Ryan_047

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Everything posted by Ryan_047

  1. It is a sign of anxiety along with rapid heart beats,shaking excessive thoughts.
  2. Din shadow work,it really does help
  3. It is very kind of you for wanting to help her. No, don't you tell her about taking psychedelics.You don't cure from depression like that. She needs affection, understanding and support.It feels like heaven if you are depressed and get those things.Talk to her on a regular basis.Let her confess and explore her feelings. Once your relationship develops a little bit,tell her about personal development.It can be huge.Also,Teal Swan's videos about depression suffering and suicidal thoughts are good. I suffered from depression in the past and managed to get over it.I can't say that I am happy and that my life has turned 180 degrees..I am still working on myself and I have a lot of things to learn.What I've done:meditated using the Do Nothing Technique for 20 minutes every day..went to gym..went regularly on walks,hanged out with friends..They may seem like ineffective things..but they add up.Also,what helped me was watching animes(Japanese cartoons).They might seem stupid,but they are not.They are very entertaining and have a lot of deep messages..animes inspired me actually.
  4. Have you been diagnosed with AvPD by a doctor? I've got anxiety too,but mine is not as bad as yours.Please tell me..are you depressed? One thing that I recommend is mindfulness meditation.It is the best kind of meditation for curing anxiety.Don't just limit yourself on 20-30 minutes.. Practice as much as you can.
  5. Hello! I am confused about this topic..I see people here on this forum taking about the NoFap challange and actually doing it.On the other hand I hear people saying that masturbation is healthy and prevents prostate cancer(Ralph Smart).On another fucking hand I see people saying that if you masturbate you increase your chances for prostate cancer -_-. What am I supposed to believe or prove to myself that one of the "theories" above is right?I am 17(guy) and never had a problem with masturbation. Fortunately,I am not addicted to porn nor to masturbation. Is it really that the NoFap challange has a role in self development?I mean..it is not normal to jack off multiple times a day or everyday..and the issue lies within yourself or your mind,not within the act itself.Therefore,trying to brute Force your way out of the act doesn't resolve your issue.I know from personal experience..there was a short period of time in my life where I masturbated a lot in order to avoid stress and other strong negative emotions..and yeah,it worked..for a few minutes..then the emotions came back.And I admit..I tried NoFap and went on for 2 weeks..I could have gone further but I thought to myself..what for? That being said..is it healthy or not to masturbate?If yes,is there any way it could have an impact on developing myself?(like developing intimacy with myself,I don't know...) Oh yeah..if you plan on telling me.."Go get a girlfriend and f her"...please don't. This is stupid..I am trying to understand if the act itself helps me in any way and how I should react to the urge to do it.
  6. @Max_V Shadow work is a better alternative.
  7. @haai14 How do you actually go on accepting yourself?I don't mean insights or mindsets,I mean some techniques. Don't give me Leo's video about self acceptance.That exercise doesn't work to well for me.
  8. I've been slacking off recently..I don't see any reason at all to do anything.Why study,meditate or improve myself in any way?For what reason? One day I am going to inevitably die.One day the entire human race will die.Even if we manage to colonize other planets to ensure our survival,the Universe will die,and therefore we too. I am not a fully developed human being,I am far from that.I have emotional problems, there is a lot to develop about myself..but why?To experience happiness?What is happiness?It just an emotion,and what does an emotion is?Some chemical reactions in your body.That's it.It is no different from anxiety, depression,stress,love, courage etc...Why should I even bother to do anything to cause some chemical reactions in my body? Why should we create purpose in our lives?Why should we fight for anything?That something that we are fighting for is going to die/disappear and no one will ever remember it again.There is no afterlife in which we will remember our achievements in life.There is no heaven/hell/reincarnation or other stuff like this.When we die,we die.Nothing remains. I often think..what if I would die right now?Why should I bother becoming enlightened or finding deeper truths about life if everything is going to end at some point?.. Please.. don't spam any of Leo's videos here.. chanches are that I've seen it.Just write.. To anyone who is thinking about replying to this thread..why are doing what you're doing?For what reason that important to you are you developing yourself? Why add value to a reason if what you're going to achieve doesn't have any value in of itself and will inevitably disappear?
  9. I can relate to some of this stuff here.I've got problems with anxiety too,but for me when I'm talking and I'm really nervous,I begin to stutter and quite often my mind just stops and forget what I wanted to say or do.One thing that I am planning to do is to practice mindfulness throughout the day.Like mindfulness breathing whenever I remember.Good luck mate!I understand your pain..
  10. @RossE Ahm..what practice?Thinking about how meaningless life is?
  11. @Serge What does real really means?What is required of something to be considered real? I think it's "bad" that existence is pointless because I am going to die and everything will be gone forever.I fantasize about how life could be for me if I start working hard..having a big house,a Golden retriever,high conscious wife and friends,help other people,have a big positive impact on my country..but then I think..what for? They are going to die, so am I so the rest of the human race.I will just spin in a circle for the rest of my life where I'll experience good things and bad things,be happy/sad etc. My mind is still looking for meaning,for a reason to do something.I want to do things...but the fact that I do them for no reason feels..sad and unmotivating..so I get stuck in doing nothing.I only follow 2 teachers (couldn't find a better word) in the realm of self development and spiritually..Leo and Teal Swan..The way she talks and explains things suggest that there is actually a reason/meaning for our life on Earth...to expand the Universe.I don't know where this knowledge comes from and how it can be proven so I am confused.I don't think that she lies or tries to manipulate..but I just don't understand. @RossE Of course there is beauty in life..in both good times and bad times..I sometimes think..if I could choose between hell and void,I would choose hell.Yeah,I would suffer for all the eternity,but I still exist.But the fact that this beauty won't last forever..makes me sad.@kieranperez Your question got me thinking.. And..I came to the conclusion that everything I do leads to ensuring my survival.Why do I eat/drink?Why do I clean myself?Why do I study?Why do I try to do personal development?Why do I want to be happy? Because I want to survive for as much as possible..In other words,I am greedy for life.
  12. @LaucherJunge Life sucks for me.How can I love a life that sucks?Yeah,I can think that things will get better at some point and then I'll be able to love life.But how does a good life and a bad life differ?They don't.How can you actually come to love life no matter the circumstances?
  13. @Hafiz How does happiness is then?
  14. @Nahm What is this love you are talking about?Where does it come from?How can you actually prove that such thing even exists in the first place?If you can't prove it,then it's no different from religion or personal beliefs about how the world works.
  15. I'll start off with my questions regarding Leo's video about self-acceptance.In the first part of the visualization, we need to remember a strong feeling of love that we experienced in the past and re-experience it.My problem is that is really hard for me to keep that feeling stick during the practice.I experience it for like 2-3 minutes and then forget about it...On other hand,Leo says that we should offer love to the "negative" aspects of ourselves.He also says "Don't think how,just give it love"..This is really frustrating to me.I don't fucking know how.Yeah yeah,he said don't think how I give that aspect of myself love,but I got stuck during the visualization.By the way,isn't this practice some sort of shadow work? Today I was sad and started craving for affection and approval more than I usually do.I just wished that somehow,someway someone would see my suffering and then hug, accept,understand and give affection to me.Right after that,I imagined a fantasy of how that would happen,and I've had strong goosebumps and also started to cry for a bit.I would like to talk about my feelings with someone face to face,but I am afraid to death to do that.I don't know any person who would understand me,and I can't reach out to a therapist for objective reasons. I should add that I experience anxiety(my anxiety comes from lack of self-esteem) often.It ruins my life,and if somehow I would get rid of it my life would be a lot smoother.I am meditating and doing affirmations daily,but they don't directly help with my anxiety.Is the practice above helpful for anxiety?Please tell me if you are currently doing it/have done it and your experiences with it.
  16. The only way I know of expanding my awareness/consciousness is by meditating..What can I do other else than meditating or increase the amount of time that I am meditating? From what I've found,another way to do this is by being conscious as much as you can throughout the day..But this sounds a bit too..vague.Are there techniques designed to raise one's consciousness? I admit that I am pretty new to the subject...I would like some theory/explanations on it, BUT DON'T BE VAGUE. And again,I am stressing that you give me practical advice on how to actually do that.
  17. 1.How can I convince myself that I am an awesome person?I have self esteem and self confidence issues and I genuinely think that I am not worthy as a person.I never praise or appreciate myself also.Please, don't start preaching about self esteem and spam videos because I am studying this issue by myself and already working towards developing my self confidence.The thing is that I want to work on this particular problem,and I don't know how.I want practical advice only. 2.Today while meditating(I'm practicing mindfulness meditation)I switched my focus on the center of my body and felt a weird and pretty intense kind of sensation/feeling.It started from the location of the heart chakra and that sensation expanded quickly into my legs and up into my arms (not all the way into my forearms though). This sensation was somehow similar to anxiety and agitation..if I would give this sensation a feeling I would say light blue..I just wanted to throw that out for some reason. Also,the sensation sticked only if I stopped breathing.This sounds a bit strange,but if I started breathing deeply the sensation would have gone away.I can recreate the experience now,but it does feel like a 5% of what I felt.I do this by stopping to breathe and shifting my focus on the place where my heart chakra supposedly is.Can someone tell me what this is?
  18. Can I get at least an answer please?It has been more than 3 days and no response...
  19. I am currently in a state of apathy and lack of motivation.I really have no drive to do anything..I'm meditating every day,doing affirmations,reading and working on my self confidence.But still,I have no direction in life.I'm in highschool and in 2 fucking years I'll have to go to college and choose a career afterwards.For now,I am studying programming and think about going on to this path.But the thing is...I like it,but not adore it..I don't feel alive,I don't have that joy.I have pretty good grades,they could get higher easily,but I don't see why even bother studying more.I don't know what I want to do with my life,but I know that it has to be something meaningful to me...I'm tired of living this boring life where nothing exciting really happens..I know that I want to have a vision for myself..but I fucking don't. I don't know what I fucking want and I don't know how to discover what I want!This sucks!And even the things that I know I want don't drive me to do much(they are trivial things like having good relationships,have money yata yata). I don't have money to buy Leo's Life Purpose Course.My parents wouldn't let me have a job because of stupid reasons and won't give me money to buy it...It is way to expensive and they would label it as trash.I've said that only to get it out of the way... So...How the actual shit can I get motivated even though I don't have a clear picture of what I want to achieve?
  20. @Mad Max How have I fitted in?Well..I'm not that sure.I've recently found out that my father abused me physically one time in my earliest years of life and for a long period of time I was afraid to even come near him.Eventually,I started to become emotionally attached to him and started to love him..but I remember that most of the time I've had a kind of resistance feeling towards my father..Like..whenever I had to do something with him,I've felt a resistance..maybe it's because of the time he abused me.My bigger brother..I remember he didn't let me express myself..Like making noises when playing with toys or talking to my toys..or running around..things like this.And he did this most of the time.I remember that I became very silent at some point because of this..being afraid/annoyed when he showed up because he would forbid my self-expression and telling me that only retarded people talk to themselves.Being the first time I write and remember my childhood..I realize that this might have caused me to become so introverted....My mother was loving most of the time..Except the times when things were going bad(financial,emotional matters) and she was spilling her frustration on me by shouting loudly..Other than that my childhood was pretty dull .I don't remember doing anything exciting..the Kindergarten years were nice..even tough I don't recall that much I know that I truly enjoyed them..I think it was the best part of my life..I was having fun with the other kids..no one was stopping me from doing anything. Pfff...Now I realize how important would be to go to therapy..But heey..I'm 17,I have no fucking money,I can't get a job because my parents would not let me to,and most recently can't even study properly because of self-doubt/hate issues,low self esteem and anxiety.It's so damn hard to heal myself emotionally..I see that now.The worst of all,I don't even have hope for myself in any way..The only reason I am going forward is not to get more miserable than I am now..because if that happens I will most likely end up commiting suicide or living a very shity life.Not that I would care that much(I don't care about myself)..but I care about my mother.I can't stand the thought that she would see me how low I've fallen..So yeah,I am trying to get up for her..not to make her suffer. Life truly sucks and there is not a light at the end of the tunnel..not even a drop..God fucking dammit.
  21. The title says it all..I really need to cure my anxiety..It literally fucks my life.I've researched the topic on the internet but what I've found is only vague and general advice that applies to only a very small amount of people.The ones who are not really suffering from panic attacks. So..how do I cure anxiety for good?Please don't give me answers like medication,sleeping more,eating healthier...I am already doing those type of general advice and it doesn't go away.Has anyone here on this forum been through anxiety and panic attacks and managed to cure it?Please share your story and most importantly how you managed to cure it..Please help me.
  22. @smd What is NLP? I've just watched Leo's video on how to deal with strong negative emotions.I'll use that process,it is really helpful.
  23. @smd It is actually mental for me.I don't drink coffee and I usually sleep for 6-7-8 hours and 20 minutes nap almost everyday of the week(except weekends).
  24. @The Monk How long have you used this technique?I mean in months/years. Also,could you please explain what do you mean by a self inquiry manner? And last..when do you actually use this technique?I know it sounds a bit dumb..but,you are doing it exactly when the feeling comes up?Or could you use this technique later that day when the moment has passed?
  25. @The Monk Has that worked for you?Have you had high anxiety levels?