Waken

Well, I don't think you have to understand where it comes from. Something that you could do it just to reach for better feeling thoughts about the subject when you feel the judgement coming up. Perhaps start with statements that express how you feel and then work your way to better thoughts (over time): 'she shouldn't just have sex with others', 'I feel disdain that this girl has had (causal) sex' 'I can't do anything about it', 'it's not really my problem', 'what she does is her business', 'maybe she has just been figuring out how to do her life', 'I don't really know why I feel this strongly about it', 'maybe I make it a bigger problem than it is', 'of course it doesn't really matter what she's has done, only that we can have a good time', 'I like that she is honest with me about these things', 'she seems really nice'. Those are just examples. It can be quite fun to move yourself to better feeling thoughts. When old ways of feeling come back, you know how to get back to good feeling thoughts again and you can use the approach to anything

My thoughts and how I see it: you are always creating yourself and life reflects and supports the energy you choose/are. If you are reaching for something that is -for probably most here anyway- an activity that is anxious and not relaxed. Just think of your usual drive for reaching a state or whatever it is and see how that feels in the body. If that's the choice you make, that's the energy you practice making more and more strongly 'you'. Perhaps life is then also reflecting that energy back to you and you find more reasons to keep going down that path. What you really want is just to feel good, and what feels good is what's natural to you. Stressing, chasing and achieving are energies that are something else than what you want and therefore not a very wise choice to practice. If you align your actions and thoughts with what feels good, you are then setting up a good feeling you/state for now and also setting it up for the future. Life can then support your choice of alignment with yourself/what feels good and then 'flows' you down the path of least resistance to all you really want. With other words; relax, think thoughts that feel good, that give relief, choose what feels good, no need to try so hard.

I usually just sit and close my eyes and be present with the energy I feel. When there are many thoughts I either hold the focus on the aliveness I feel in the body, or I think thoughts that feel pleasant. I wouldn't be too busy or concerned with 'what is the most effective meditation technique', because that idea itself probably contains some tension for you and if you practice that idea you just practice that tension. Just relaxing and not worrying too much feels more at ease, and thereby you create ease over time. I think it's a good thought that whatever makes you feel best (thus not trying too hard) will be most effective, because it is most you. Whatever technique is the most attractive to you -not one that hypes up the mind per sé, but the one that feels most pleasant in your body- might be the best option to choose for you, because the attraction tells you it's aligned with you. Just my 2 cents:)

Well, in the end what's causing you to feel bad is not how you look or how (you think) others perceive you, but how you think (about yourself). Perhaps because of your belief of being ugly, you are attracting situations that are reflecting that belief back to you. I can imagine that to be a heavy burden, to think of yourself such a way. An important point for you would be to change the way you look at yourself, to think kinder to/over yourself. Find thoughts about yourself that make you feel better, and perhaps than you'll attract people in your life that will reflect that new energy back to you. You could also use the thought that you are not the body, (p.s. you're really not that body lol), so it's actually not even you. That body is just something you're wearing. I just say that because it might give a little relief, but of course the most loving thing you could do is to learn to love yourself just the way you are. Again, I think if you look at what you really want, that you might find that what you really want is not a girlfriend or such, but just to feel good. And that you can control. Hope that helps a little

I would suggest a slightly more gentle approach. Of course, there are other ways to go about it, but this is something I feel is real good and loving way to go about life. Okay, so if you hold this thought: "I need to let go of my past mistakes and ...", how does that feel? Hard? Heavy? Struggle? And how Do these thoughts feel: "Maybe I don't have to make myself feel so much struggle", "Maybe I don't have to try so hard in order to feel good", "Maybe I only have to be more gentle and loving with myself". So how does those thought feel? Stressful, stuggly and heavy again? How about thinking thoughts that make you feel relief, starting from what feels true for you and then moving towards finding more good feelings thoughts (over time) that give you relief, like: "I don't always feel good about myself" "I'm trying to do my best though", "I know it doesn't really matter what others think about me, only how I think to myself", "I'm not doing so bad" "I'm here to learn all this and have plenty time to sort it all out", "I like it to feel better and better about myself". That's something I've picked up from Abraham Hicks (channeled material), and if you feel attracted to this approach you could for example read the 'astonishing power of emotions'. However, your message does feel to have this "I'm wanting and am motivated to really make my life happen"-energy that so many people have, that I think perhaps you won't take the bait of a more gentle approach lol. But.. finding better feeling thoughts like just described, I think is much better 'thought art' than the sloppy thought thoughts expressed in your text.. ;-)

Liked it, thank you

@Alysssa Love it, especially that I think you stick really close to expressing to what you feel is you

Sounds wise, love it

And how to these thoughts feel: "I don't have to try to be optimistic", "I don't have to try to be compassionate", and "I don't have to bring myself back to a place I've already been". This is a method you could use. Find thoughts that give you relief and make you feel better. It doesn't matter what the thought is, whatever it is, any thought will do, just a thought that feels good and gives some relief and thereby releasing resistance. And then you do it, feel some relief and after some time the negative pattern comes back somewhat, and you find thoughts again that give relief and feel good. You can climb your way to better feeling thoughts this way over time, start whereever you are and then go for better and better feelings thoughts: "I don't have to be different than I am now", "I don't have to have it figured out", "Maybe I made things harder for myself than they need to be", "I only have to be gentle with myself", "I really appreciate what I've learned in the meantime", etc.

My thoughts: I think if you want to advance spirituality, it would be a good perspective to just look at what excites you most. Because spirituality is about YOU, and so whatever attracts you most, is most in alignment with the vibration you are, which will therefor serve you best.

Lol, little typo there. Edited it

I think if you feel excited about it, then surely it must be the right choice for you. Yesterday I had my first 1-on-1 video guidance with someone, helping the other to see he wasn't a body or person. Felt excited and nervous for it, but the conversation went really good it felt really good too. Following excitement/joy is my guiding light and doubt it could possibly lead you wrong

@Preety_India Thank you. I feel quite confident that the more you relax, are kind to yourself, the more good feeling things will (have no choice but) come your way. I suppose though, that will profile pics such as those, some horny man might also find your way

Maybe, but you're still saying that you're trying hard to attract a man. Trying hard is a very different energy than being in a good feeling place and thus allowing it all to come to you. Yes, I understand. In my current view, it's however much better that if you are going for a relationship, to find thoughts about finding love that make you feel relief/better and then see what happens.

Are you trying to fill a void? How I understand it is: if you are aligned with who you are/your natural vibration, and thus when you feel good, you will attract things that feel good to you. You are getting back reflections of your energy. So if your real preference is having a partner that is emotional, and you're in alignment (thus feeling good), you'll attract someone that will feel good to you, thus he'd be emotional. If you are trying to fill a void by finding a partner, perhaps you'll attract someone who also tries to fill a void with finding a partner. Like, if you feel inferior or something, perhaps you'll attract someone who will reflect that belief back to you. If you are sending out the energy of 'trying hard to attract someone', that might not improve your odds or speed of attracting a partner you would really dig, so it might be good to relax and remind yourself that what you actually want is having a good relationship with who you really are first. However, even if you attract partners that aren't what you prefer, that's not necessarily a bad thing. Because you then can better get in touch with unwanted beliefs and decide that you don't prefer to chose that belief anymore, and by seeing something you don't prefer you get clearer on what you do prefer, and thus be able to attract that improved idea of a relationship in the future. I love sharing Abraham Hicks or Bashar video's, I think what they say is just such amazing news for us earthlings that have been taught that life is so hard. Frankly, Abraham has many videos on the matter, I didn't check it but just took something. Bashar also has a good video on Youtube you might like 'Bashar channeling, I'm heartbroken'.

Not sure if you find this video resonating, but in my view it is an answer to at least a good portion of your struggles:

I didn't get much RASA, but I was told I was at 1000 at some point, and some of the connections of the one who told me confirmed. That's quite some years ago now, and can't say much happened. Pretty sure there was a lot of make believe there involved. I think if you feel attracted to the transmissions, there can be use for it. But I think it's a big misconception that any sort of transmission is a golden pill for everyone. Maybe when you're very close to a breakthrough and someone gives a little push with a transmission or something.. And of course if you believe a transmission will work miracles, perhaps that believe will generate a positive effect.

Thank you flume:)

I doubt I would have felt inspired to create something like this if I hadn't experienced certain expanded states of consciousness. For some time I've been into fractals and kaleidoscope which are used in the animation. I made light fractals first and then animated them and am very pleased with the result :-)

Maybe talking a lot just isn't in your nature. I would just give up the struggle of trying to fix yourself and trying to conform to the idea of how you think you should be, and start dropping in what actually feels right for you to do and be instead. Of course, if you feel that sharing something is something you like to do, but feel some fear for it, it's good to try to share a little more. That gets easier over time rather fast even if you just do it a little more. How you are right now, is good enough. Just relax a little more and go with what feels good, you'll expand naturally

Most people try to fill the idea of a void within them, and then look for outwards things to fill it up; substances, relationships, food, etc. What I would do is to recognize that someone who is controlling me, is not actually the relationship I prefer. Maybe I would question if there is something in me that has benefitted from the controlling behavior. Maybe I didn't think/feel highly of myself, and this controlling relationship was attracted because of that. I think that waves of missing him is very normal, that happens to people all the time. I think that maybe for you there is a big gift for you by not trying to distract yourself or trying to fill the void again when you feel you miss him by grasping to food/television/other activities, and allowing yourself to be present with how you feel. Maybe this video resonates with you? :-) Much love,

How I see it, not controlling life is just the same as being present in the moment. As a practice you could (I'm doing this too) practice alignment with what feels best for you to do in any moment. Just let go, go with the flow, look for the option of things to do that feels best. Don't do things because of what you think it will get you, don't do things to 'make it happen', just pick the option that feels best. Could be taking a walk, watching a movie, calling a friend, etc. If you feel inspiration, go with that. Meditation is good, because it is a non-resisting activity, but going to meditate while you don't feel like it, just because you want to make it happen, is a no for me. Most humans think that 'I am here at A, and I want to go to B, so I'll have to forge my way to B from here'. With this approach you practice aligning yourself/your life with what feels good, and then the better you feel, the better things can come/are allowed to come to you.

Ah yes, discovered Jacob Colier not too long ago. When I listened to his music I had the thought he might have come with an expanded consciousness to this earth. His understanding of music is great and he follows his own passion very well. I make music too, but when I listened to him I felt like I was just fooling myself and even felt to give up on my own playing because my own music just felt like childsplay

I dig Bashar's suggestion on how to do these things, which is: follow your excitement. Just look at what option is available that has the most joy/passion/attraction/etc to it. What feels best for you to do now. No need to force anything, to try to make something happen. Just looking at what you would like most to do or experience now. Then as Bashar says you are following the guidance of your soul and everything will start fitting together perfectly.