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About effy01

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  1. when i had a panic attack , i say to my self all panick attacks dont last more than 30 -20 min and wont cause you to die .... like it appears too , like the kick ass state , so i accept it and make space for it in my body , i say COME ON Eff YOU CAN go through this , then i ask my self wich part of my body do i feel more in alert ,in my case its my heart down to my stomach so i try to sense it , and it goes away slowly ...
  2. @Javfly33 i think i should fine my dance between the two .
  3. @Serotoninluv you are right , thats what i feel .
  4. you guys dont understand me , maybe im wrong im not saying that i have it all sorted , i just has this insight : what if the we are incarnated to this life , to forget that we are god , i feel like we want to exit human life as soon as we are incarnated ...
  5. Today after digging deep while locked down in my home alone , i realised that i actually dont wanna be awakened , i just wanna experience life as it is in this human form , i wanna feel evry emotions as it is , im okay to being afraid of my death , i dont wanna be right , i just wanna be this simple human i am , i just dont want self developmnt anymore , it just created this resistence of me , when i started on this i just accept my self less and less like if i always need to do something to love my self more ...... maybe im wrong but thats what i feel
  6. that can be a good movie scoring , congrats man .
  7. i think both cities offer a wide art painting craft , Malasaña ,Lavapies , are good place to start here in madrid , if i were you i would write the pros and cons of every city , don't care much about the catalan prob its not your FIGHT its theirs it has always been this way years ago , you can easy talk Spanish and English and survive in Barcelona or Madrid if surrounded with the right people , here is pretty cold in winter and very hot in summer , im Moroccan and don't care about what people think of me and i barely feel racism only when i go to do some paperwork ,people gonna treat you in the way you are projecting your self ,not your ethnicity ,and artistic circles are pretty open minded in that way .both cities have similar rent cost , if you love the sea go to bcn , remember you can always refine your vision and expand your art in different cities , follow your intuition don't listen to people .
  8. i live in Madrid , which kind of art are you doing ?
  9. i started my dj career at 26 , i had more knowledge of music than most of young djs ... so twas just about learning techniques hope that inspires you @Aeris wrong Djing is an ART if done properly , go digg all kind of music dont get stuck in one genre , i started from disco going to house, acid ,garage break beats ,hip hop ,jazz,pfunk .... the mainstream scene is a trap , target your audience carefully ,the underground audience is very intelligent and want to hear good music
  10. i dont care about how leo praticee spirituality , you should create your costumed spirituality practice dont be lazy what works for others not always work for me error and trial is key.peace and love.
  11. @Aggelos Doulgerakis YES you are right , i m expecting nothing from meditation , its just that it made me confused because i was feeling normal , ut after 10 min meditation i was scared of what i don't know really ,last day i journaled right after , and start contemplation the sense of fear i had and me crying at the end , the crying was me having empathy for my self , scared maybe to stay in the current situation im in if i failed another time but its no sense because i finally found my life purpose i payed two years training online and practice in the studio and im starting in October , i made a bold change in my life , the transition phase was the hardest one , i literally lost everything , i think a huge part of my ego still didn't accept that , so it refuse to be still in the present moment ut rather want to distract my self , also i just felt high naturally when i opened my eyes , this sense of awareness of reality scared me , the different state of mind scared me , im a coward AHAH , but will definitely continue on this path because it brings out all my fears at the surface , i can FEEL them and finally let them GO . peace and love y all
  12. @Nahm thanks man woow the link is very helpful and well explained i ll start with the second meditation for tomorrow that's what my intuition tells me thanks . peace and love
  13. thank you so much for your response;im gonna try 5 min session tommorow in the morning with do nothing technique but in the morning outside in the park with sun shining ,and not in my tiny room because it reminds me of me smoking weed here and feelin depressed .if the anxiety kicks in im gonna try mindfulness meditation then see what suits me in this period of time . thank you so much peace and love .