Zigzag Idiot

Read this soon after you posted it the other day. My thoughts have been with you periodically this week in a Tonglen way.

With eyes closed and quality sound equipment.

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You just have to discover for yourself, I would say. Ocke de Boer- In his own words: "Gurdjieff was and is a very big guy in the Fourth Way, but he did not invent it." http://www.higherbeingbodies.com/about-the-author.html I try to observe my tendency towards hero worship. This is a lifelong behavioral tendency of mine. From Captain Kirk and Mr Spock, Yoda, L. Ron Hubbard, Ken Wilbur, Eckart Tolle, Cynthia Bourgeault, ALi Almaas, George Gurdjieff, Ocke de Boer, Hunter Thompson, George Washington,,,, etc.,,

http://biologyofkundalini.com/article.php@story=DroppingthePain-body.html

That's absolutely fine. Thanks for sharing. ?@ElseImproved

He mentions a counterintuitive "precondition for experiencing the Cosmic giggle" which I take roughly as being in the flow and it sounds like what Almaas refers to as basic trust. It may sound like a stretch but as a state of consciousness, it's very similar it seems. IME Basic Trust Enables You to Completely Stay with Experience As we have seen, when you are trying to make something happen, you are not trusting the natural order; you don't trust that Essence itself will manifest in the way it is needed. The first point of departure from this trust is always a rejection of the now. To apply the perspective of basic trust, of true will, you must have the complete confidence that staying completely with what you are experiencing in this moment, will result in what needs to happen, without your having to think about a certain outcome. When the confidence is there, your awareness of exactly what is happening in you will allow you to see that your organism will do the best it can in the situation. Your mind, however, doesn't allow that complete Presence in the now; it thinks it knows what is best for you, but of course it knows only what has happened in the past, and can lead you only in ways conditioned by your history. Diamond Heart Book Two, pg. 118

? Great articulation/thoughts/integration!!

There is really some value to these short clips explaining Fourth Way Ideas.

Inner considering robs energy

Unconditional Love cannot be held as a behavioral standard. At times, I've observed guilt/shame feelings arise automatically. For no reason other than just reacting to my own automatic reflections. We can only feel what we honestly feel. Guilt often shows up mechanically. This is where awareness is curative. Witness Consciousness does not feed on negative emotions. Self Observation without inner criticism is curative, eventually. from The Oracle Of The Cosmic Way: "The idea of both conditional and unconditional love comes from the collective ego, and reveals its thinking in terms of opposites. Giving love on conditions is the ego's way of withholding love until it gets what it wants. True love is a Cosmic gift to a person's true self, and is meant to flow from there to other's true selves, and back to the Cosmos, in a complete circle. This Cosmic gift is never meant to be thrown away at the ego because the ego is outside the Cosmic principles. The collective ego has invented the idea of unconditional love to rob the True self of its very life force, under the pretense that it is "spiritual" to extend one's love to everyone, regardless of the ego's presence."

I notice how I never do,, what I say I'm going to do.

Abstract Morning Scrabble and becoming transpersonal Child - prerational - innocence - pre-personal - spontaneity slowly dissolves adult - rational - securing survival necessities - ego/personality - reactivity replaces spontaneity actualizer - foregiveness/letting go - transrational - Metanoia - spontaneity returns - transpersonal Love - understanding I never really liked Donavan's music but I couldn't resist holding my nose and posting this song,,,,? Love with a big L is Transpersonal Love ?‍♂️✌️?‍♂️

Had a very deep and sound sleep last night and upon awakening immediately made the following list that I would like to tie together in an essay sometime. My fluctuating boundaries Normal Innocent same-sex encounters during puberty and adolescence which become shadow The growth and persistence of unchecked Sexual Shadow All three sexes as mentioned by Gurdjieff The different effects of alcohol and various drugs on Consciousness and sexuality Being a 'hardwired heterosexual' but still labeled by others as suspicious and weird. Individuation Neptunium Love and Plutonium Lust during peak Kundalini flows The awakening of Conscience Culturally and socially encouraged homophobia and cowardice and stuff

This is a favorite of mine. Just found this review on it. This is a good book if you're making a study of your own corruption. Also a quote page- https://themindunleashed.com/2017/01/10-quotes-chogyam-trungpa-rinpoche-cut-spiritual-b-s.html An article about it https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/enlightened-living/200812/cutting-through-spiritual-materialism

It doesn't appeal to everyone but in case your interested, ACIM addresses this in dialogue where the idea of Romantic love is called the special relationship,,,, ,A Course in Miracles – Chapter 15 – V. The Holy Instant and Special Relationships T-15.V.1. The holy instant is the Holy Spirit's most useful learning device for teaching you love's meaning. 2 For its purpose is to suspend judgment entirely. 3 Judgment always rests on the past, for past experience is the basis on which you judge. 4 Judgment becomes impossible without the past, for without it you do not understand anything. 5 You would make no attempt to judge, because it would be quite apparent to you that you do not understand what anything means. 6 You are afraid of this because you believe that without the ego, all would be chaos. 7 Yet I assure you that without the ego, all would be love. T-15.V.2. The past is the ego's chief learning device, for it is in the past that you learned to define your own needs and acquired methods for meeting them on your own terms. 2 We have said that to limit love to part of the Sonship is to bring guilt into your relationships, and thus make them unreal. 3 If you seek to separate out certain aspects of the totality and look to them to meet your imagined needs, you are attempting to use separation to save you. 4 How, then, could guilt not enter? 5 For separation is the source of guilt, and to appeal to it for salvation is to believe you are alone. 6 To be alone is to be guilty. 7 For to experience yourself as alone is to deny the Oneness of the Father and His Son, and thus to attack reality. T-15.V.3. You cannot love parts of reality and understand what love means. 2 If you would love unlike to God, Who knows no special love, how can you understand it? 3 To believe that special relationships, with special love, can offer you salvation is the belief that separation is salvation. 4 For it is the complete equality of the Atonement in which salvation lies. 5 How can you decide that special aspects of the Sonship can give you more than others? 6 The past has taught you this. 7 Yet the holy instant teaches you it is not so. T-15.V.4. Because of guilt, all special relationships have elements of fear in them. 2 This is why they shift and change so frequently. 3 They are not based on changeless love alone. 4 And love, where fear has entered, cannot be depended on because it is not perfect. 5 In His function as Interpreter of what you made, the Holy Spirit uses special relationships, which you have chosen to support the ego, as learning experiences that point to truth. 6 Under His teaching, every relationship becomes a lesson in love. T-15.V.5. The Holy Spirit knows no one is special. 2 Yet He also perceives that you have made special relationships, which He would purify and not let you destroy. 3 However unholy the reason you made them may be, He can translate them into holiness by removing as much fear as you will let Him. 4 You can place any relationship under His care and be sure that it will not result in pain, if you offer Him your willingness to have it serve no need but His. 5 All the guilt in it arises from your use of it. 6 All the love from His. 7 Do not, then, be afraid to let go your imagined needs, which would destroy the relationship. 8 Your only need is His. T-15.V.6. Any relationship you would substitute for another has not been offered to the Holy Spirit for His use. 2 There is no substitute for love. 3 If you would attempt to substitute one aspect of love for another, you have placed less value on one and more on the other. 4 You have not only separated them, but you have also judged against both. 5 Yet you had judged against yourself first, or you would never have imagined that you needed your brothers as they were not. 6 Unless you had seen yourself as without love, you could not have judged them so like you in lack. T-15.V.7. The ego's use of relationships is so fragmented that it frequently goes even farther; one part of one aspect suits its purposes, while it prefers different parts of another aspect. 2 Thus does it assemble reality to its own capricious liking, offering for your seeking a picture whose likeness does not exist. 3 For there is nothing in Heaven or earth that it resembles, and so, however much you seek for its reality, you cannot find it because it is not real. T-15.V.8. Everyone on earth has formed special relationships, and although this is not so in Heaven, the Holy Spirit knows how to bring a touch of Heaven to them here. 2 In the holy instant no one is special, for your personal needs intrude on no one to make your brothers seem different. 3 Without the values from the past, you would see them all the same and like yourself. 4 Nor would you see any separation between yourself and them. 5 In the holy instant, you see in each relationship what it will be when you perceive only the present. T-15.V.9. God knows you now. 2 He remembers nothing, having always known you exactly as He knows you now. 3 The holy instant reflects His knowing by bringing all perception out of the past, thus removing the frame of reference you have built by which to judge your brothers. 4 Once this is gone, the Holy Spirit substitutes His frame of reference for it. 5 His frame of reference is simply God. 6 The Holy Spirit's timelessness lies only here. 7 For in the holy instant, free of the past, you see that love is in you, and you have no need to look without and snatch love guiltily from where you thought it was. T-15.V.10. All your relationships are blessed in the holy instant, because the blessing is not limited. 2 In the holy instant the Sonship gains as one, and united in your blessing it becomes one to you. 3 The meaning of love is the meaning God gave to it. 4 Give to it any meaning apart from His, and it is impossible to understand it. 5 God loves every brother as He loves you; neither less nor more. 6 He needs them all equally, and so do you. 7 In time, you have been told to offer miracles as I direct, and let the Holy Spirit bring to you those who are seeking you. 8 Yet in the holy instant you unite directly with God, and all your brothers join in Christ. 9 Those who are joined in Christ are in no way separate. 10 For Christ is the Self the Sonship shares, as God shares His Self with Christ. T-15.V.11. Think you that you can judge the Self of God? 2 God has created It beyond judgment, out of His need to extend His Love. 3 With love in you, you have no need except to extend it. 4 In the holy instant there is no conflict of needs, for there is only one. 5 For the holy instant reaches to eternity, and to the Mind of God. 6 And it is only there love has meaning, and only there can it be understood. from : https://acourseinmiraclesnow.com/course-miracles-chapter-15-v-holy-instant-special-relationships/