ivankiss

Creativity alone can purify your entire being and set you on 'the right track' towards peace, joy, fulfilment and enlightenment, even. In fact, creativity is what ultimately lead me to self - realization. I came to understand reality and existence as a whole because of creativity. Because of my pure, unconditional love and appreciation for music. And its unconditional love and appreciation for me. I've been committed to this path since I was 6, not even knowing what I was really signing up for. It's been more than 20 years now and the passion just keeps burning stronger and stronger. I was knocked off track, several times, but I always found my way back. It always found its way back to me. It is simply meant to be. It was challenging to get back into the flow - if you will - but once that momentum started building up, I was sucked into it before I even knew it. And oh boy does it feel good. There is no bullshit running through my mind. No toxic nonsense. No limiting, self - defeating ideas, no judgement, no fear, no worry. My mind is preoccupied with melodies, rhythms, arrangements, etc. It's all just juicy, free-flowing creativity. Active, conscious, living, breathing imagination. And guess what that is...? It's Truth. Creativity is all around you. Yourself included. Creativity is God - quite literally. Knowing how to take hold of that energy - so to speak - channel it and turn it into something unique and defined, is a skill worth learning. You cannot not be creative. How conscious you are of your creation (and destruction) is another thing. Generally speaking, the less you consciously create, the more you unconsciously (self) destruct. Have fun.

@Princess Arabia All is well. No hard feelings. Besides, it's not like there is no truth to what you wrote. I am well aware that I can be a dick sometimes. Not denying it. Take care.

@Princess Arabia I don't think anyone ever knew me this well. You must be a psychic. Thanks for the tarot reading, will reflect on your words.

Don't worry guys, I'm not as grandiose and omnipotent as Leo. I do not claim to be the most awakened one, the God of all Gods or anything like that. I do consider quite a few people higher above me - if you will. I do think there are more 'woke' folks out there than me. For sure. And for all you brainwashed nondualists: chill, I know there is no 'others'. But consider the possibility that I know something you don't. I do have deep respect and admiration for some. Even on this forum. But sadly, those are very few. The majority of members that wanna be smart with me and prove how much more awake they are than me... are ignorant sleepwalkers. Another insult you can write down and memorize. If Leo can beat you with a zen stick, then I guess we can all bash each-other too. After all, we are being lead by an example. Right, princess? I know this place well. I learned to speak its language fluently - a while ago. I know which buttons to push. I know what it responds to. I will not be the one to clean up the mess. But I will say it's shit if it's shit. With all the good intentions, of course.

Don't be so needy of attention. You are not the first or the last one saying that exact same thing. You should know that if you read my rants - as you say. Besides that, I don't see any point in continuing this dialog. I do not see you fit for giving me any advice and I doubt you know this place and what's going on here better than I do. I cannot take your opinion too seriously, sorry. Wow, thanks. Wasn't aware of that. It's not like I said it like 7 times in this thread only. Obviously, I still see some kind of value in this place. That's why I'm hesitant to leave. That's the stupidest thing I heard today. lol. Talk about toxic spiritual nonsense...

What is "masculine anger" ? (as opposed to feminine anger, I guess?)

It's nothing new really. I had my problems with this place from day one - pretty much. And I wasn't silent about it. Maybe it's just me, maybe not. I highly doubt it though... I think many see the same shit I see. But even if it was just me, I think the situation is getting worse and worse. It might spit me out on its own, if I'm too hesitant. I don't want to leave just yet, but I feel kind of ashamed for staying.

You guys are full of shit with your 'be the change that you wanna see' kind of nonsense. Yes, true to some extent, but that's not exactly how things work in a severely toxic environment. What you are suggesting would only contribute to the toxicity, paradoxically. You absolutely do have the right to be pissed about something and speak your mind, especially if it's holding you back or harming you. It will not make you less enlightened or awake or heart-centered or anything. Fools. Yes, you guys can piss me off so much with your bullshit. And that's where I understand Leo. You must have nerves of steel for this kind of shit. I would not trade shoes with him. But the real reason I'm pissed is because I think this place is turning into shit and I don't want to be a part of it. Even though I would really hate to leave, after all these years. That's why I'm angry, that's why I'm being loud and dramatic lately. Hope that clarifies things for you.

What does it mean to be awake? I'll tell you what it does not. It most certainty does not mean you become a lunatic who keeps mumbling stuff about some stupid trip, or some lame realization, or some weak ass insight, or whatever - completely disconnected from your being and your environment. Sound asleep. Thinking you're wide awake. It's the biggest ego trip there is. It's beyond insanity, indeed. And not in a good way. Yes, your realizations and experiences might be true and valid. But you have to be aware enough to realize that they do not exist, anywhere, in this very moment. It's mist. It's gone. It evaporated. It is simply not here. In actuality, there is nothing but complete emptiness in this very moment. And not the hollow, incomplete kind of emptiness... Rather, the most fulfilling, whole, united and connected emptiness. Oneness. Anything other than this emptiness, is some sort of an alteration. Distortion. Imagination. Delusion. It could hold value and be of some sort of use, I imagine. But is it absolutely true? Heck no. It's an idea. Just like Santa Claus. Or your entire identity.

@Someone here Yeah... "Spiritual folks" often use insights and realizations that they may or may not have actually had, to justify their deficiencies, their nasty behaviours, their twisted words and views. I've seen "enlightened" beings acting more asleep and stupid than any random stranger you can stop on the street. Often someone who has no idea about any of this stuff is more present, grounded and actually awake than someone who can ramble on and on about awakening. @Swarnim Yes. Awakening of the mind, awakening of the heart, and then the balancing and the integration of both. Merging into one, singular, whole "entity" - if you will. The heart is the mind and the mind is the heart.

It's just the mind playing tricks on itself. Thinking it will be more enlightened if it stops using certain words, responding to its birth name, or whatever else. It's rather funny. Stupid, but innocent.

I'm so pissed I'm not even mad

Divine man Appointed Claiming the stern voice of God Absolute judgments passed from where you cowards hide The lair of snakes Your dark haven Where you and your ophidian partisans abide

@Someone here Thanks. I'd say art is the final product of creativity. It is something defined and solid that the artist puts on a pedestal for others to admire, interpret in their own ways, etc. It is the artist's attempt to capture a moment of infinity. It is like a snapshot of God - if you will. And a good artist should know how to make that picture speak loud and clear.

Is it just me or is there more and more low quality nonsense on this forum - particularly on this sub? I've been active here, pretty consistently for the past 4/5 years, and I'd say that the quality of the content has been dropping steadily over the years. My guess is that more and more 'low consciousness' folks are joining the forum and more and more 'high consciousness' folks are leaving, or are semi-active, kind of in the background. Which is not necessarily a bad thing, but I feel like the balance is not quite there in this case. Every other member posting on this sub is now 'God-realized' or 'the most awakened one' or whatever else. I've seen members hijack the entire sub, rambling about how enlightened they are, what things are or are not, etc. And I get it. You have some mystical experiences, a few realizations, you take some psychedelics, you meditate a bit... and now you want the whole world to know how enlightened you are. I know the feel, bro. Been there. And I certainly have done or said some stupid shit on here myself. But you gotta tame that beast, bro. You gotta be smarter than that. You must know your place. I have respect for certain members here, even though I wouldn't say I'm particularly close to anyone. But I value the opinion of some. To various extents. I also find zero value in what some other member have to share or suggest. Simply because they've proven themselves to be immature, underdeveloped and 'asleep'. They are usually equipped with loads of fake confidence too, which makes things even more cringy. Where is genuine curiosity? Genuine desire for wisdom and awakening? Love? Communion? Unity? I'm not saying there is zero of that on this forum, but it's far less prevalent than all the other nonsense. What I'm trying to suggest is: don't post just any stupid shit that crosses your half awake mind. If you're going to state something, make it good and solid. Make it so that it makes sense to those who are reading. Make it so it has a tail and a head. Don't just ramble foolishly, jerking off in everyone's faces. And if you're going to ask for guidance, advice or help... do it with humility and open-mindedness. Don't ask if you think you already know the answer. Don't ask if you are unable to listen. Work on basic communication skills before you set out to seek enlightenment and whatnot. Be a decent human being first. Then you can maybe try being God lol. I used to like this place. I still kind of do. Don't turn it into a shitfest now, ok? Thanks.

If this place is shit, it means that most of you guys are not doing the work at all, or are not doing it correctly. Because ideally, you would come on here and try to get some answers, open up some doors for yourself, discover new methods and tools, etc. And then you are supposed to go "out there" and do the work. Implement all that stuff you gathered here. And you do that, you should come back a better person - if you will. Stronger, wiser, more loving, etc. Some sort of progress should be noticeable. You would contribute higher quality content to this place. And I don't really see that happing. I see the opposite. That is why I'm disturbing your sleep.

Thanks for your input guys. I resonate with most what you said. To various degrees. Perhaps this is just natural progression and it's just how the forum and the community are evolving. There's always going to be little bit of bullshit in the background. Everywhere you look. And I think that's beautiful. It should be that way. Spices things up a bit. Makes it a bit more exciting. But if the bullshit is overwhelming and there is little to no light to be seen, then I'd say there is a problem. Not saying this place is all shit, but sometimes I'm kind of worried that things are not heading the "right direction". No, I don't really give a fuck. I've got much more important things going on for me than some stupid little forum. And also yes, I do give a fuck. Because I do see beauty in this place and I would like to be a part of it. It's just that it's a bit difficult to be proud of being part of something that's still kind of toxic and twisted. It just does not seem like a very healthy environment. It's kinda getto. And again cool, to some extant, but not cool if it completely takes over. I myself am a lot more shadowy these days. I'm not all rainbows and butterflies. You could say that I'm integrating my shadow, and it's not the prettiest process to witness. I do say stupid shit here sometimes and I do become a bit aggressive or bitter or bitchy here and there. I might be a bit of a dick towards some of you. And for that I am sorry - in most cases. But still I'm doing my best to stand for "the good" and "the light" - if you will. Even though I allow my shadow to take over the wheel, here and there. I try to be wise about it and not let it spiral out of control. I try to respect both my shadow-self and whoever else is on the other side. To the best of my abilities. I'm not just saying all this to brag about how cool and enlightened I am, but since some of you emphasized the importance of leading by example, I felt inspired to briefly share where I stand on these things. Maybe it opens up something in you, maybe it does nothing for you, who knows... What I very rarely do, if ever, is attack random strangers on the internet out of nowhere, for no other reason than different beliefs or ideas that we subscribe to. I thank that's a line that should not be crossed. It's ok to disagree and even have heated arguments, but if you start attacking one's character you are simply not developed enough no be here. It's useful though to know how to "defend" yourself from these dicks. Because they can fuck you up, real bad. I was never really a victim of abuse on here, but I've seen stuff... So yeah, maybe another thing that should be given a bit more focus. And that's all mostly just basic human decency that I'm talking about here. I'm not even going into all the grandiose delusions about God-realization and whatnot.. It pisses me of sometimes because a lot of the stuff that's posted here is like a bastardisation of "the real thing" and "the real work". It's just cringy and goofy an low quality. It's misleading and it paints the wrong picture of this place and this work. Maybe every topic should be read by a moderator before it's approved to be published or something, idk... Point is, I'm sure things could level up instead of down, so let's try and strive towards that.

No. That's an extreme limitation. Almost like a defect. Sounds nice at first, but in reality it's not really what one would think.

@uronlydreaming No bro, ain't gonna work, sorry. It's not my first time dealing with folks like this here. You ignore what's being said and instead attack my character. You basically say "there is no issue. You are the issue." And I heard that one before. It's one of the favourite cards to pull in spiritual circles. Cannot take you or what you have to say seriously, sorry. Thanks for screening me though, appreciate the feedback. I only hope you are equally as good at reflecting on yourself.

With great power comes great responsibilities Yeah, it's not devoid of bullshit, but cool. Good for him.

@uronlydreaming Of course. I'm just projecting. Did not see that one coming... Not everything I say here is gold. Far from it. There's plenty of bullshit, I'm aware of that. But expressing a few thoughts about an issue is not a "low consciousness" thing to do, in my book. This is just me seeing the shit that's going on, painting a picture of it and posting it for others to see too. So please, post some of that earth-shattering, super duper transformational stuff for us to read - if you got any. I hope it's at least as exciting and mind -blowing as alien squirrel consciousness, or ultra absolute solipsism, or war of gods or something along those lines. Make it good. When you come back, that is.

Although it is funny to see topics like this being ignored, while topics like "I AM THE GODLIEST GOD OF THEM ALL - AMA!" blow up instantaneously. We all want THE TRUTH, yet we play dumb and refuse to see it when it's right in front of us. Marvellous creatures. God job, Father. Jk lol

It is what it is. I don't really have any suggestions on what should be done about it. It is the internet, after all. Just an observation on my behalf. Felt like saying a thing or two about it. All is well - I suppose.

Yes. Perseverance. Never look back. Consistency. Protein. Hustle. Push ups. Never sleep. Never rest. Never listen to haters. Never give up. Never back down.

If you are on the hero's journey, or any journey at all - trying to attain or achieve something, improve or transform, etc... you better be ready for them curveballs. Life is most certainly going to throw a couple of those along the way. And you won't see them coming. That's what's so brilliant about it. It's perfectly inconvenient. Unexpected, and it fucks up things so flawlessly. As if by design. As if it's higher intelligence at play. Because that's exactly what it is. So how can you be ready and prepared for something that's meant to catch you off guard and shake up your world? Well, you can't, really. But you can acquire the skills and cultivate the strength and wisdom to deal with pretty much anything that emerges out of nowhere and tries to throw you off track. You can also let it knock you down, trusting that you will always recover and eventually find your way back. Up to you. Nevertheless, curveballs will be thrown. I had a solid plan laid out for myself. A plan to get me to a specific place - if you will. And oh man, the amount of curveballs... but here I am. Still going. Still pushing. I know I can overcome nearly anything life throws at me, because this is what I am meant to do. There is nothing else for me. This is my purpose, my mission, my game, my dream, my life. This is what I want, this is what I signed up for. This is what I chose, this is what chose me. You see what I mean? When you really have something worth living and dying for, the challenges in-between are not all that scary. You see past them. See through them. Understand why they're there. You might not have a solution for every problem in an instance, but you will have this deep knowing that it's all ok. All part of the plan.