ivankiss

Something tells me though, she has the idea of me paying both of our rents. Because we're together. Or what. Ahh... Pretty girls...

Three months would be ideal, but really, I just need the room for a month, to save up a bit. Let's hope things don't become too wild. In which case, back to the hostel.

I can see myself staying here for the summer, even under these circumstances. Sure, why not, I'll do a little situationship for a while. I really need this room.

Yes girl no girl, one thing is for sure... This is the best thing I've ever done in my life, and the story could not get any more epic. One day I'll tell you all about it.

Yeah, it's a no for me. God bless her poor soul, but she's at least 3 times crazier than she is hot. And she's really hot. Definitely not considering her for a long term relationship anymore. But maybe something short term... If it’s too good to be true, it's because it probably is.

I think I get it now.

Now she wants to go to Spain together again... Ok...

Yeah, it's best if I take a few more steps back...

Wow do I feel like a jerk now... Here's a girl that has a thousand and one problems, and all I'm thinking is how to put my dick inside of her. Of course she sees right through it.

It would be easier if she wasn't sleeping half naked next to me...

I'm open to giving this some more time and energy. I'm willing to negotiate. But I cannot afford to be thrown off track. If I read in between the lines, what her body language and overall vibe is telling me, is that she's here, that she's in, but she's very overwhelmed and I'm adding even more pressure and stress. Yes. Too fast too furious. For sure. And that's my fault, admittedly.

We're slowly starting to communicate normally again. But she's in pain, I can tell. And on her period. So yeah... It's best if we keep some distance now. She did point out a couple of my shortcomings during the argument, and it was spot on. Assuming instead of asking. Jumping to conclusions instead of communicating clearly. I can’t actually hold anything against her. Can't blame myself too much either. All is well.

Jk I know no one is reading this.

Is this yet another I want her but she's not good for me type of a situation? Should I be single a bit longer? Is she really capable of following me? Co-operating and co-creating? If you're not about to jump out of your seat from all this tension and excitement, you're not doing it right.

I don't think anyone knows it, but it's possible to learn how to love yourself when no one is around to love you. You don't necessarily have to turn into a psycho and walk all over people just because mommy and daddy weren't there. But you can.

If you think this is because I still have some unresolved mommy issues, you're wrong. I was abandoned and neglected not just by my mom, but by both of my parents. Yup. I'm that kind of fucked up. And by that I mean badass.

Lots of baggage... Heavy stuff... But oh so understandable. I'd like to see you not going nuts after learning you have cancer. Can I love this girl and take care of her? Would I? Yes. But do I really need that in my life now? Would it slow me down, or exhaust me too much? Would it break me? I don't know man... Let's give it a bit more time...

I bow to no man and no God. Only hot, crazy girls.

Yesterday she had 3 seizures. At some point she stopped breathing, and my heart nearly jumped out of my throat. I had to breathe into her. Fuck... I don't know if I really wanna sign up for this...

I'm a good demon I swear.

Jk never apologize it's for the weak.

It's working because now she's vacuum cleaning the apartment in a mini skirt and no panties on.

First fight was yes. For you amateurs out there, I'll let you know, in order to have a happy and long lasting relationship, it's not enough for you to just say that she's right and that you're sorry. Oh no. You must also know to explain to her why she's right and why you're sorry, in great detail.

Of course it's better than I can imagine.

A new fucking era. And just how epic. I have achieved more with this girl in a single week than with others in months or even years. It's just working. And we're heading up towards the sky, fast. I still don't really know exactly who she is or was, and I don't want to examine her past. What matters to me is that we're rocking it now. That we're staying true. Loyal, committed, devoted. There was a match, then straight away mirroring and growth. I don't know how high she can follow me, but she's more than willing to just drop everything and go. She's ready for a new life. A good life. I can tell. And that... kind of makes me wanna buy a ring. Yes. I cannot belive I'm saying this, but it feels right. If things stay this awesome for the summer... I'm pretty sure I'm doing it. She's already dreaming about it, I know...