ivankiss

@allislove I am the thing that should not be. The impossible

@Nahm Curious, have you directly experienced serious abuse in relationships?

I don't see how I'm being harsh here. It's not like I'm telling anyone they're doing anything wrong or that they suck. I'm speaking in general here, and about the majority of people, not everyone. Psychedelics are simply not a shortcut to enlightenment. And they are not for all people. Sorry if I ruined the party for some of you. Then again; these are just my thoughts. Not absolute truths, or anything.

@Raptorsin7 For now, my main source is trading. I imagine later on music will be making me some nice money, too. And I also have a few other small businesses ideas in mind. Good luck on your journey!

@Emerald Interesting twist. Thanks.

Holding. No significant moves on the chart. I might be a bit too early. ATR: 18.64

Men get abused by women, tons. It's not just the other way around. I love everything @JosephKnecht said. I'd add these thoughts: When you have been repeatedly humiliated, devalued, shamed, ridiculed, manipulated, played and betrayed - by the one person you call 'the love of your life' - you are being stripped away of this thing called 'dignity'. And without that; you cannot be a man. Men must be proud and stand tall. They must not doubt the steps they're taking. The poison you got infected by, is just that. Infinite self-doubt. Lack of self-respect. Self-trust. Self-care. Self-love. Shattered self-esteem. Poor self-image. And all of that is caused by the above mentioned. By the hands of your lover. Sad but true. The firs step in reclaiming your power and masculinity... is walking out that door and never looking back. And that... is but a beginning of a long and painful healing journey. That's where you grow your balls out.

@Preety_India Cool, you know what's best for you. All I can do is guess.

I hope this does not insult you, but I'll be very direct. Speaking from the heart. You come off (to me) as already way too masculine. The chaos you think is caused by your feminine side, might indeed be the reason why. But it's only because your feminine side is desperately trying to catch your attention. I think this is extremely common in all women, today. And especially in women who live under deeply conditioned circumstances and are being practically held hostage by rules and people that reflect pure toxic masculinity. If I'm right - and I might totally not be - I'd say; plan your escape. Find safety. Peace. Respect. Warmth. Freedom. Only under those circumstances can your femininity truly blossom, and things can balance each-other out. Anything bellow that is suppressing your true, divine nature. Don't try to become more like them, in order to thrive amongst them. Get the hell away from them and be as you truly are.

God... I love it when I'm horny and also in touch with my dark side. It's such a special vibe. So powerful.

Don't wanna take it slow I wanna take you home And watch the world explode From underneath your glow I wanna watch the way You creep across my skull You slowly enter 'Cause you know my room And then you crawl your knees off Before you shake my tomb I wanna watch you close I need to see for sure And then the tape is on Who do you think we could show? I wanna watch the way You creep across my skull

I'm an animal I'm a victim I'm the answer to your prayers I'm a witness On the witchhunt I'm the monster up the stairs I'm ghost that's In the mirror I'm everything that you fear I'm the riptide I'm the soul-shock I'm the voice that's in your head I've seen it all Still can't taste it Smashed to the wall That brought me to my knees I've done it all Fucked up Wasted Still in my blood But now inside unseen I'm the hunted I'm a predator I'm the answer to the riddle I'm the upbeat I'm the headfuck I'm the way yarn flips to the middle I'm the player I'm naive I'm the one who's not addicted I'm the logic To the fuck up I'm the broken one who fixed it I'm just a child With the tears in it's eyes I am holding this gift That is broken What do I have left now I've seen it all I've done it all I've seen it all I've done it all

Well I wish there was someone Well I wish there was someone To love me When I used to be someone And I knew there was someone That loved me As I sit here frozen alone Even ghosts get tired and go home As they crawl back under the stones And I wish there was something Please tell me there's something better And I wish there was something more than this Saturated loneliness And I wish I could feel it And I wish I could steal it Abduct it, corrupt it, but I never can it's just saturated loneliness Does the silence get lonely? Does the silence get lonely? Who knows? I've been hearing it tell me I've been hearing it tell me Go home Cause the freaks are playing tonight They packed up and turned out the lights And I wish there was something Please tell me there's something better And I wish there was something more than this Saturated loneliness And I wish I could feel it And I wish I could steal it Abduct it, corrupt it, but I never can It's just saturated loneliness And the bath waters cold And this life's getting old And I wish I could feel it And I wish I could feel it And I wish I could steal it Abduct it, corrupt it And I wish I could feel it And I wish I could steal it And I wish I could feel it Abduct it, corrupt it But I never can I never can Never Can Never Can Never Can

Because survival is consciousness, too.

Being in alignment with your purpose? Your highest calling? Your mission? Duh.

The dude died in a battle, his wife was barely pushing through each new day of her life, and all you see is moustache and uniform. I thought you were deeper than this.

@AdamR95 Awesome. I'd add; it's not only about how many hours you spent contemplating the nature of reality... but also how in alignment with your true purpose you lived. How heart-centered you were. How loving, caring, sensitive, etc. @Carl-Richard Haha good call. I might take a break soon. Right now though; it's relevant. I'm more creative and also; sex is otherworldly

@Hulia Oh, I see. My bad. J... is not her. Definitely. But they do share quite a few qualities.

@Hulia Does it matter, really? Both songs are potent enough to completely devastate and kill a man. Beautiful story, too. Thanks for sharing. I don't remember imagining how exactly would we meet... But I was searching for her since I can remember. Only recently have I been spat out of that spinning wheel of madness.

I tried to project your image onto another, and delude myself into believing you're by my side... It kinda worked for a little while, but deep down I always knew it wasn't you. None could come even close to the reality of who you truly are. It was all a cheap knock-off. But I loved them as I love you... sorta. I trust you understand my passion for women. You know it's all just child's play. And If there is a man by your side; I only hope he's treating you with respect and showing you at least a quarter of the love I've got for you. Blessed be his name. Only I know how to love you truly. Unconditionally. Only I am your true match. We split up in heaven. I know it was an agreement. We're both on a mission. We've got stuff to do here. Hope you're doing well, my love. I'm sure I'd be infinitely proud of you - if only I could see you for a moment. I made peace with not meeting you in this life-time, ever. Something tells me, we're both alone in this game. I can live with that. But if our lips are indeed destined to touch, on this journey... man... I cannot even begin imagining all the beauty. It seems to good to be true. ...Here's another masterpiece for you, in the name of this silly, illusory distance between us two. Remember: We are one in heart; one in mind. Always and forever. Keep rockin', girl! You are one of a kind. All the stars are shining just for you. Cold windowpane A car upturned in the rain Wait on in vain Don't try to bear the blame Deal with the pain Dust down your wings again You need to clear away All the jetsam in your brain And face the truth Well love can make amends But while the darkness always ends You're still alone So drive home Pause without end A moment in time suspends How could she leave? Release all your guilt and breathe Give up your pain Hold up your head again You need to clear away All the jetsam in your brain And face the truth Well love can make amends While the darkness always ends You're still alone So drive home Drive home Drive home

I know I have not met you yet. But sometimes it feels like I've already lost you. My truest, one and only love. I have mistaken someone else's eyes for yours. Someone else's lips. I know you're out there, somewhere, gazing at the same moon, the same stars; wondering where I am. I'd like to dedicate this beautiful song to you. It's about the pain of loss and separation. Or at least; that's how I interpret it. Yours, truly. Forever. Spiralling nights in the void Weathered coat and a dagger If I dream back my youth I can still hear you sing A voice that will die on a mountain And I fear That I've stayed here Just a little too long I had to go where you couldn't follow In my weariness I still hear you singing in my mind And all the of fortunes they took away The shifting earth beneath us (Nothing to observe) The clouds at our feet (Nothing to observe) The sun was made of a jewel (Nothing to observe) When at night it did sleep Nothing to observe Cast in a trench of fire I can see the sky is a ceiling And when my heart dies down I am long gone On the fields of summer's green Away from fall and famine In my weariness I still hear you singing in my mind (And all the fortunes they took away) The shifting earth beneath us (Nothing to observe) The clouds at our feet (Nothing to observe) The sun was made of a jewel (Nothing to observe) When at night it did sleep I'm in every season The one you have always known Life did not reward you So find your way to the river and let go The shifting earth beneath us (Nothing to observe) The clouds at our feet (Nothing to observe) The sun was made of a jewel (Nothing to observe) When at night it did sleep Nothing to observe The shifting earth beneath us (Nothing to observe) The clouds at our feet (Nothing to observe) The sun was made of a jewel (Nothing to observe) When at night it did sleep

Apparently, older women like me, too. A pretty damn hot, classy lady just fucked me with her eyes. Flirting is more subtle on these levels, but still, it was pretty damn obvious that she was attracted to me. She must've been 45+ years old. Feels good, not gonna lie. Maybe I should consider older women, too. It might be a very cool experience. So far, the oldest I've been with was 33 or so. Back when I was 20. It was pretty much a fail though. A story on its own...

The vibe between me and that supermodel blondie is just ridiculous. We are flirting hard. Fucking each-other with our eyes. Sho does not seem to be avoiding me, at all. She's always waiting to catch me looking in her direction. What a fucking tease. I know it might sound evil, but man, I hope she dumps her boyfriend. Something tells me I'd tread her much, much better.

@RendHeaven All is well J slept over, after all. She could not resist. I came 4 times like a true champion. She came god knows how many times. I'm still kinda horny though..

J is coming over for a quickie. She's not going to sleep over. Perfect timing. I'm horny as fuck today. I'm getting all this female attention and sex, and it feels great. But secretly, on the inside, I still feel very insecure and unworthy of love. Good thing no one notices.