Azrael

If you do some research (reading books) you will find pretty shocking evidence for most of these spiritual / supranatural phenomena. I once digged into past-life hypnotherapy - read a book about it - and I was shocked by the scientific evidence of some cases. For example, what they did is: They made someone see one of his past-lifes through hypnotherapy and then brought him to a moment in time where he read the newspaper in his past-life. Then they double-checked in the archives what that newspaper said and see whether it is correct. Another one is letting someone speak out loud during the session while he is in a past-life in which he speaks a different language. Then you double-check whether the language - he normally can't speak - is correct. There also is some good research on astral projection and especially remote viewing. Read up, it's fascinating.

@egoless, I think that if you implement these things on the long-term YOU might have a good life (if you want that stuff). But keep in mind that it has nothing to do with enlightenment. One of the realizations I had after my awakening that shocked me for a good 1-2 months daily is: Well, you still gotta do shit with your time. That was so shocking because after the awakening all the mental-masturbation, all the analysis, all the thoughts about myself and spirituality just fell away. And this was a big chunk of my daily thoughts. So, expect to have radical shifts of perspective on these topics with time. None of them might be "it" and none of them will work for everyone, but just go with how it comes. For me personally, I have a long-term plan that I work out. I know that after my studies I wanna move to North America (maybe Vancouver or an American City that is similar), live their, have my own programming project, build a family at some point and have an relaxed life. And that will be fine for me. Another person might want something completely different and that's fine, too.

And God is like: "Pff, bitch whuut? I'm infinite. You can't get me with 12 laws."

@AleksM, that's well and good, but still not scientifically backed. @Berjohansen, cool that you found a paper that investigated that. I'd still not say that this is conclusive, because we know that DMT is in a lot of plants and so could get into the body through that but I think if more studies look into it they could make a case.

I just researched a little bit in the "scholar-ly" side of the internet and it seems to be that it is still an unproven thesis that DMT occurs in the body. I could at least not find any study that says something otherwise.

How are we not the brain. That is - especially for us scientific, western ppl - probably one of the hardest things to get over. Because it just seems so self-evident that we are the brain. The normal unenlightened man feels himself mostly to be in the head (although this varies in cultures). Firstly, we have to realize that the brain itself is a relative symptom of the human-alike 3D perspective. That means, that by having the senses you have, you are able to experience a brain. Imagine you'd have another sense that would be "as real" as seeing, hearing, touching etc. but would be in its function completely distinct from all the other senses. Now, look at the brain again. What would you perceive? You'd perceive something completely different and you'd make sense of the brain completely differently. Now consider, that there is not only one other sense to perceive the brain but an infinite amount and that you are just given these few finite senses out of an infinite set to perceive the world. That'll loosen the self-evidence of just being a head a little bit up. Now, I would make the argument that we have a sense that we don't even now of because we only are aware of this sense when we are born and when we die. Everyone who had an real ego death on a psychedelic experience, will know what I mean. And that sense is the contraction of the finite reality we perceive - that stuff seems literally finite. This is a very fundamental perspective that underlies every other sense that we have. Imagine how it would be if everything "opened up" and your normal reality would actually seem like a colourful projection in empty dark nothing-like space. I would also make the argument that you can show to yourself that this is actually the case and that you can empirically prove that to you. These two points can be your start in discovering that the head is not what you thought it to be and that there might be more to it.

Because our relative world works in certain structures. So for example if I let my laptop fall on my foot, I'll feel a very intense feeling in my foot. No reason why, that's just how this dynamic of relativity expresses itself. The very same way when something falls on the ground, as a human with the gift of hearing you hear a sound. So why is hate here? It is here because it's part of a dynamic. And one perspective on this dynamic would describe it the following way: Hate begins to express itself in a human being if one holds on to a concept and it is shown not to be real. Note, that sadness or fear could also arise from that situation. How can that be? Instead of asking why, look at how hate expresses itself, when it and in which dynamic it comes up. Because the human being still doesn't let go of the concept he is holding. So, it can be shown to be not real again and produce hate. Again, look rather at how can something be persistent instead of why. You release hate when it comes up, you recognize it, you ask into yourself "why do I feel hate?", listen to the answer and then release that part of your world view. You can do that with any emotion that comes up.

It depends. Enlightenment is radical shift on multiple layers. It's like you take a seed and watch it grow. Psychedelics are like fertilizers. They can speed up the process a lot yes, but it takes a lot of other things like intellectual ground work, explorations of your body and physique, understanding relationships to yourself, other people and your reality ... to get everything down. So yes, 5-MeO-DMT especially will bring you the most growth when it comes to enlightenment, but there are way more things involved that you need to be mature in your understanding.

Can't talk about business here. Find out for yourself. Re-FUCKING-search.

From my own experience with different strands, they are not that different. It's like with weed or alcohol. If you have done it a lot, you'll be able to recognize differences and like certain strains over others. For beginners, I'd say that keeping an eye on dosage is way more important.

I think that if you have to ask, you are not ready. Because this is a decision you can only know for yourself. You know "how you are", how able you are to confront very difficult situations. So it won't help you if I hypnotize you into believing that you can do that. I can bring up a ton of reasons that you can do psychedelics with a family background of psychological illness, I can also bring up a ton of counter-arguments. In the end, it doesn't matter, because I don't know you. And just reading how you write, you seem not to be too confident with this topic and because I know that it takes some balls to start with this and that you can seriously fuck yourself up with it, I say "no". It would be (in my reasoning) foolish to just say "Ahhh, you'll be fine", because probably you won't. Nothing personal man, but I just don't know you and psychedelics can be fucking dangerous.

Well, this is an important topic for everyone who wants to start and has no experiences with drugs in general. When I started out with psychedelics I had a good amount of experiences with altered states of consciousness. I did a lot of weed when I was in my teens and I did molly (MDMA) a couple of times + speed like one time when I was younger. Plus I smoke. So I know how it's like when you take something and suddenly your world beings to shift. Psychedelics still - even for me - were and ARE a big thing every time I do them because they fuck with you on such a deep level and they require so much letting go from your side. So here is my recommendation for someone who never did drugs and wants to start with psychedelics for personal development / enquiring one's own nature. First substance you should try is weed. Not in a social setting, but just get it, smoke or vape it and see how you take it. While being stoned see how it changes you and see whether you can deal with it. After you have smoked / vaped it a few times, eat it. Eating pot will give you a totally different experience and it'll go in a psychedelic direction if you have good weed. Read on dosages and research it as you please do with every drug you take. If you can stand weed I'd actually recommend to try molly (MDMA) before you do real psychedelics. Again, please read up about dosage, risks etc. Molly is a chemical and can potentially fuck you up. I think it's good to try though because you can a) have stunning insights and experiences if you do it on your own + it'll introduce you to serious chemical substances, how it is to come "on" and "off", how to handle it etc. After having done molly a few times, you can choose your first real psychedelic substance. I haven't done AL-LAD so far, but @Leo Gura speaks highly of it, so it is probably a good choice for starters. Start on low dosages and then work yourself up. After you have had some real psychedelic breakthrough on the normal substances like AL-LAD, LSD, shrooms, 2-CB you'll know for yourself how ready you are. On the way you'll discover your favourite psychedelic and maybe work with it. I like shrooms a lot and I work a lot with them, other people use other substances. As long as you take your time for this process, research everything that you do and start on low dosages and slowly increase, you can be safe. If you have some physical or mental conditions that can come into your way, you should research whether you should do this at all. In the end of the day though it'll take some big balls, wisdom, courage and trust in yourself to do something like 4g shrooms. You'll not get around that. That's needed for any big change. I would highly suggest that if you've done all that and you are somewhat experienced in the field with the normal substances, that you try normal DMT before you try 5-MeO-DMT. First of all, normal DMT is heavy enough and secondly it'll introduce you into the "WHAAAAAT THE FUUUUCK"-Land + quick onsets. If you are able to do normal DMT and you have done all the other stuff, are wise and research a lot, you got at least all the measurable requirements that it takes to think about 5-MeO-DMT (at least in my opinion). And even then ... with all the research and experience ... it'll fucking blow you away like you never would've thought. It's just well-advisable to be able to fly a jet plane before you fly in outer space.

That you forget yourself throughout the day should be a hint that there is no you in the first place. Don't train yourself to be "there" all the time. FInd out through your lack of persistence that you are fake in the first place and by that destroy the illusion. You'll end up at the same place of silence.

That was a metaphor. I spoke about that it doesn't matter what happens while "Do Nothing". Whether you have monkey mind or a 5-MeO-LIKE sitting.

Nope, there is no goal. Really. There isn't. Nowhere to get to, nothing to do. Doesn't matter if you have monkey-mind or a 5-MeO like sitting. Just sit. With time you'll understand why there is no goal. And yes, eyes open, son.

No, stick with meditation.

https://www.wimhofmethod.com/

Thanks for the share. Interesting video!

As long as you have to ask, you are not there.

OMG, you just came up with the most beautiful counter argument to this point. Nothing to add. Applause to you.

Probably. Your dreams work through unconscious stuff. If you think a lot about enlightenment, you'll dream about it. Just as with anything else. Yes, you can become completely absolute in that state. Happens sometimes after you've taken 5-MeO. You don't forget to be aware. You are still aware when the ego kicks in, as you say. It's just that the content of awareness changes when ego is there. It's like you put on a suit through with you perceive the world. When an enlightened man thinks, there is no make-belief fake persona in the back of his mind that says: "Yeah, baby". No one, who is excited, no one who is sad. There might be thoughts, might be excitement, might be sadness, but no one who suffers from them. That's why on one level the experience of the enlightened man is exactly the same as of the unenlightened while being completely different at the same time. For the enlightened everything still happens the same way, it's just that there is no one there who experiences it.

In the fully conscious state there is a coherent story of thoughts happening. Because it's coherent, it seems to your "watcher" that everything is fine. When this coherence gets out of balance because you are for instance depressed, sad, dreamy, injured, ill etc. it seems to the "watcher" that something is not working properly. As a normal reaction resistance is brought up because that's what automatically happens when you are in a situation that you don't like. So, the state of numbness is nothing to get rid of, it's the resistance that needs to be released. Where do you go in that state? Well, picture it like that: Say awareness is a big TV portraying your story and let's say there is a feature to the TV that it can know whether something is happening on the screen or not. When you are clear and alert, there is a good movie running. When you are dizzy, fatigued, ill, dreamy ... the TV is switching channels. YOU are always there as the TV. It's just that its content changes.

Let your friend do EMDR. It will be much faster than meditation and work quite instantly especially with PTSD and traumas. Research it. I've done it for other reasons and it's one of my top 5 knives when it comes to cleaning the mind / nervous system.

Soo, I am just back from my Vancouver vacation. I met @Be Yourself who lives there and he introduced me to the place. Thanks for that again. It was very nice. He got me some of that good BC weed, we had a lot of very deep discussions about the whole journey and we actually tripped on acid together and shared a nice trip. It was very spiritual in many regards. Cheers to you, man. Plus, I went to a concert of one of my favourite rappers who actually inspired me with a song to create this avatar, called Azrael. I'll come back to that city and probably move there in a few years. This trip report - however - is about an experience that I had like a month ago that is by far the deepest I ever went. It took me so long to put this into words because it was so profound that I have actually a hard time thinking about it. Even right now it's kinda hard. When I trip these days I always trip on 5-MeO, doesn't matter which psychedelic I choose. If I do shrooms as I did in this experience, it's 5 hours of 5-MeO combined with shrooms. This brings tripping to a whole new place for me. Because there is a very distinct difference in having a nice and profound experience compared to having a complete dissolution of your normal perspective and going to a different place. I'll talk about that in a second. I think I went to the same place @Leo Gura went in this trip. I've talked to him about that. Of course I can only listen to his description and my trip was very different, but it's like you go to Mars. It doesn't matter what place you visit on Mars, if you hear somebody talking about it you know whether he went there or not if you went there yourself. It feels like that. So I had a very big smile on my face when I listened to the video. You know that shit gets serious when Leo doesn't start with "Hey Leo" no more. But let's go back in time roughly a month ago. I'm in my apartment, currently learning for my exams for over a month now. I'm a little exhausted from that. Also, I got the first harvest from my shrooms grow kit that is fully dry now. I got a golden teacher grow kit for the first time and it brought me some nice, all natural shrooms. So I'm thinking lets try the shrooms. It's in the evening, I weigh 3,5g of the shrooms and cut them into little pieces. Now I know that when I do 3+ grams of shrooms these days where I'm headed. But I didn't expect where it would take me this time. So, I eat the shrooms, drink some orange juice, put on my favourite tripping music mix and lie down on my bed. In the beginning I just chill, relax and wait for it to come up. So I wait. After like 20 minutes I feel that it starts. I get the typical super meditative shrooms vibe. Everything calms down, looks very sharp and nice. The body load comes on quite heavy, so I just try to relax more and get into it. I close my eyes and just breathe. The first thing that happens is that my body feeling slowly goes away. Before my awakening shrooms would always get rid of my tensions. Now I don't have a lot of my tensions in my body any more, but I can still feel it. So it feels like a wave is going through my body every few seconds and deletes the feeling of having a body quite drastically. I watch this and at some point it is totally gone. My eyes are closed at this point and I'm super relaxed. The body load is completely gone because there is no body any more. Ok went there before here and there. Then, the deconstruction of my personal perspective begins. You can picture it like a head that slowly deconstructs into all the pieces that it is made of. It's ego death to the fullest. It feels like going away. Firstly the concentration in the eyes deconstruct to the point where I cannot perceive sight any more. Then listening deconstructs to the point where I cannot hear any more. Then feeling goes away as well. At last there comes the ability to think, the total deconstruction of mind and through that the total dissolution of your personal perspective that is kept up by all these ways of perceiving. As the mind falls into a thousand pieces a lot of very scary things come up. I relive some of the bad things that happened to me in life. I also relive how I am eaten by a tiger and a crocodile, some crazy stuff happens. In the beginning it's very uncomfortable, but as I go through some of these scenarios I naturally begin to just take the pressure of the intense situation and ride on that. Then at some point they are finished and the last thing I think is "I am about to die". It is that cold and clear. I went a few times to this point in prior trips and it never went beyond on shrooms. Sometimes I freaked in the last moment and stopped the trip. This time - and I don't know why - I just took it because I was ready. It was okay. So at this point I feel "myself" to be a little electronic impulse going through my neurons. That's the last thing that is left of me. All the body is gone, all the senses are gone, all thinking gone - the present still remains. And I am now this tiny, tiny impulse in my head. Then at some point even that goes away. And when that happens, it feels like I am total presence, but still locked in this world, just that everything else went away. It then feels like this presence expands and expands to the margin of its reality and then it pops. It's like there is a man in a balloon and that is his life. The man is always in the centre of the balloon so he can never actually touch it. When he seems to move, the balloon moves. All that happens for him, happens in the balloon. He doesn't know that he lives in a balloon and he doesn't know how the balloon world works because the actual reality of the balloon is axiomatic to his existence. That means, that there is a bigger reality outside of the balloon that shapes and forms the balloon reality. It is an implication of the bigger reality and so can never fathom this bigger reality because it's a part of it. When I did the shrooms, first the little body of the man went away, then the head space of the man went away, then the balloon was left and then it blew up to the point where it exploded. I cannot really perceive how this felt. I think I saw some stuff, but it is not important either way. It felt like being sucked out of reality from behind. Like someone would grab you from behind out of this world. Quite crazy. Now the personal reality is totally gone. Azrael is totally dead. What happened. I still have a few pictures of the place that I went to and I can clearly see how I came back into the personal reality after it. So let me try to describe it. It feels like I am coming out of a book page in front of me into some place. I don't have a body, I cannot really think, but I can somehow perceive. Firstly, it is totally apparent to me who I am - God himself. Secondly, I instantly realize that I am coming out of a dream and that I have done this before. Then I see this book in front of me and the pages of the book turn by themselves very quickly and I see countless dreams. As I look into them it feels like I download countless bits of insights and information but it happens so fast that I cannot make something out of it. Then it goes to one specific page which shows me the nature of relativity - the explosion of Yin & Yang. I see into it and go through endless dreams as God. I go through the scenario of being eaten again by a tiger and a crocodile as God and it does nothing to me. I feel nothing. I can see it clearly but I feel nothing. It's just an intense experience that happens but nothing more. It's not even intense in that situation. It's just one dream world. Then I go into a lot of other worlds and I see how they manifest in nothingness. I see how they come up in this book and I see how they have endless structures and dynamics to them. It's happening really fast so I just get a a glimpse of that. But it doesn't matter what happens in the dreams because I begin to understand how they work. All of this time insights and information hit me. I don't know why and how and can't even explain how it feels, but it's just clear that it happens. Then after this the book turns to the page of my dream "called Azrael" again and then I slowly turn into this. It really feels like going into the page. While this is happening everything turns black and I see a thousand little particles in this blackness arise. It feels like a concept space arises and it slowly gets together and creates a total conceptual reality in this pure empty presence. And as it does it I become that. As this happens I remember that I went through this before. When I was born the first time into this perspective. Now I'm back in this dream, in "my room", in "my body" and it slowly begins to work again. I breathe for the first time again. The body feeling slowly comes back. the mind comes back. I'm still completely aware that I am God and I am completely aware that everything here is conceptual. Conceptual and non-existent to the point that I could cut myself with a knife and I wouldn't feel it. I was in that mode for a few more hours after the trip until it closed down to my normal awakened reality. But to this day I can sense how this dream works. How it comes into existence every moment and that it is completely conceptual. Completely groundless. Now, this is the best I can describe what happened. It doesn't even cover 1% of what really happened because it sounds that I just went bad shit insane. It surely does. And maybe I cannot convince you that I didn't, but that's fine. From this day on it changed completely how I perceive the world because I saw for the first time how it actually manifests. Bad shit insane. I would have never thought that our dream reality is that fucking crazy. If you are brought up with the normal scientific paradigm that you live on a planet and are this body it is bad shit insane to see that this actually is a complete conceptual, groundless dream happening in nothingness. In nothing at all. In a concept space. Soo, that's the trip. What can we make out of it. Firstly, let's get rid of some misguiding perceptions. Is the place with the book the place where you go after you die? The place itself, probably yes. The stuff with the book and shit, probably not. Why? It became apparent to me when I went there that relative reality is actually not one reality but an endless fractal of realities. So we live in our dream right now that has certain properties. It looks a certain way, it works a certain way, it feels a certain way. There is a concept space of stuff that can happen and there is a creative, intelligent force that makes certain stuff appear in this concept space. It's like a river of patterns and structures that is flowing to you right now from nothingness that makes up everything you are in this dream. Now this dream concept space is enforced by another reality, another concept space that is axiomatic to the dream. It creates the dream. So there are different things to see there, to feel there and to perceive there. Stuff works there a different way, but it works also in a certain way. Just as we are able to build a car in this dream, the reality behind that is able to create these dreams. How it does that, I don't know. What else you can do in this space, I don't know. Are you still some kind of individual in that space, it's strange. I felt to be God and absolute - just as on normal 5-MeO very clearly but at the same time it had an individual aspect to it. I will need more trips to explore that. So the stuff that I saw there and experienced there is as relative as it is in this dream. It's just that it's a different concept space, a different reality. That's why you will see different things there, because it's a different world to explore. And lastly, this is not the end stage. As I said, relative reality seems to be an infinite fractal of realities. That means that the dream you are living right now is implicated by the place I went to and the place I went to is implicated by another reality. And it seems to go on like this. Just because it's relative, completely conceptual and groundless. So, to sum things up. When you die, your dream ends for sure. Your current relative reality pops. You'll then probably go to the place where I went. I'd guess. How it'll be for you, I don't know. What will happen there for you, I don't know. I don't even know what'll happen for me there. But something will happen in some way or another. Reality is actually a fractal of realities, one creating the other, totally groundless, totally conceptual. You can realize that this is so right here and now, in this dream. You can go there yourself and experience how it is like to die and be born. You can be God. Well, you are God any way. Now, I know myself that this is a big pill to swallow. And trust me it's even harder when you experience it yourself. That being said, understand that I just describe in the best way I can how it was for me. It is still a description and can never portray to you that this is actually the case. Maybe it convinces you, probably not. That's fine. It's enough that I have seen it for myself. What you have to do now if you wanna experience the explosion of Yin & Yang, the nature of relativity, is to go there yourself and see that this is so. To do that you just need some 5-MeO trips and then every psychedelic that you'll take after will with time bring you there. For sure. I'll let you know whether I go to this place again in future trips and if I do, what I can bring back. Until then, be good to yourself. Cheers, Azrael PS: I'm thinking right now to go to the US next summer and visit some big cities so that I can make a decision whether Vancouver is the right place for me or not. I'd like to see a little bit of the east coast and then some more of the west coast. So, if you live in a big well-known city that is exciting, let me know. Maybe we'll meet.