Gog

So I'm new here. My aim is to share a journal of my progress in life in the hope that through interacting I can better realise my aims. I have several targets which I have had for many years. Today I'm going to start with the first one, mastering my mathematics undergraduate. Owing to ill health, I only managed to get a 2:2 although I did go on to start a PhD in maths, gaining an MPhil. So my story is not one lacking in success. However, there are several things that I feel I never really managed to achieve. One is to gain some employment teaching undergraduate. I am not so concerned about whether or not I'm freelance or attached to an institution. I know of several people who tutor undergraduate courses freelance, so that is my first aim. Another thing that I'd like to get to the stage of doing is to master the mathematics necessary for understanding quantum mechanics. To date most of my mathematical understanding has centred around the real numbers, not the complex numbers. There is a crucial difference when applying these number systems to modelling the world. The real numbers are the only complete ordered field. The complex numbers are complete, but they are not ordered, at least not linearly. The way one deals with this is one of the reasons quantum mechanics behaves differently to classical mechanics. It is not simply a question of having extra dimensions, but rather how one applies a metric or norm. Norms in the complex plane are different from norms in Lorentzian space-time, and I still need to get to grips with what the difference between these two approaches really is. Indeed I am not even overly confident with the definition of a norm at the moment. I have covered it, but I can't remember it off the top of my head. However the first course that I want to go over is differential equations. I pretty much skipped this as an undergraduate, but so far it is not much harder than A-Level. The Schrodinger Equation is of course a partial differential equation, so that is one motivation. Another is that differential equations are among the most widely applicable areas of mathematics. I have completed the first chapter of my lecture notes on the subject, covering the various methods of solving first-order ODEs. I did this on fifteen minutes a day, and it took me about three months, partly because I was working from several sets of lecture notes, covering the same material with different presentations. I found it quite easy, but I still need to memorize the techniques to really master them enough to teach off the top of my head. Of course, if I had the notes in front of me, I could teach them now, so I am relatively pleased. My next target is to do chapter two, which is on second-order ODEs. Again, I plan to do fifteen minutes a day, starting today. Fifteen minutes a day is about the maximum I can comfortably do at the moment, the problem is that at this rate it will take me about forty-eight years to master the basics of my undergraduate degree (about twelve modules). I don't know how long I'll live, but forty-eight years to do a three year course seems far too long to say the least. So beyond doing my fifteen minutes a day on differential equations, one of my aims is to get up to doing about three to four hours a day study period. However there is no rush, even if it takes me forty-eight years I am not really bothered, it is only something to do in life. So we'll see. Today I plan to start the second chapter of my differential equations notes, and try an maintain fifteen minutes a day for the next three months at least. Will be documenting my progress, and also adding in some of my other aims as well. Thank you.

Women choose, men approach. Assimilation is the woman's prerogative, this is what it means when one says a woman can only marry a Muslim whereas a man can marry a woman of any religion. Thus there is no reason for protectionism. However, to protect a woman's honour is the duty of all men. Protecting a woman's honour is done at the behest of women and that is the difference. Integration, becoming one with the woman's circle of friends and family, is one technique by which a man may gain the favour of a woman. Differentiation is another. Now does anyone have any questions? Thank you.

@tsuki so everyone is using my spam box already, why not join the party, huh, ok then, here goes, a hug x

So Class is not linear, a mistake that many naïve Marxists make. A country is a surface and thus cannot be linearly ordered. Usually it is arranged in what is called a "strict partial order". It can further be partitioned into regions bounded by a graph. When modelling the weather, and here I am guessing from my limited knowledge, one partitions into regions and then works out the dominant attractor in each region and whether it is strange or simple. One then repeats the process using a different set of regions. This is in stark contrast to elections where the set of regions is fixed, but quite close to how polling is carried out. I'm making a lot of assumptions here having never studied any of this. Who needs books? I'll return to that question tomorrow, when hopefully I can settle down into reading again. Thank you.

When one talks to a psycho-analyst, it allows one to pursue self-enquiry in a safe space, the psycho-analyst is like a blank slate. When one goes to confession, the priest will erase the logismoi (thoughts of separation) from the confessor allowing them to start afresh. Is it wrong to assume the internet is a psycho-analyst or a priest? Does gossip harm the machine?

74 (Turkey invades Cyprus) 11 (Tai) 33 (Tun) - just wondering what my options are

So I'm wondering what the attraction of ivory towers are to me, A bigger salary, but less independence, Greater pain in the workload, Right now I can only really tweet the odd ode to my admirers in the mirror, Research is great unless you have to document it as well, Teaching is fun as long as it is a two way conversation, Marking is ok if you set the questions I suppose, Conforming to funding applications is more focused than I am used to, So what am I really after, security.

My friend has been talking about buying the U.S. for some time, I told him it was a bad idea, but we already bought MIT so hell why not a bit of hippy Crete as well

So some reflections of my understanding of universality: Abandoning Cartesian co-ordinates is never truly possible as with the mind-body split, this is why I have always considered zen or chan a cop out. Hieroglyphs are at once symbols and syllables and they are arranged in a pattern that may or may not be linear in space. There has always been one language, for example yineka, "woman" in Greek, somethiNG, etc... so sounds are reflected and resonated around the world, I have heard something similar in Chinese, from where does the English word "Bow" come from? If you look at a fractal there is no origin, or rather every point is an origin. Leibniz's dream was to get machines to do our proofs for us, I read the other day on the tube that we are entering into a future of sex robots and the like, maths has always been poetic, I think art sells quite well, think of Kandinsky's paintings of music, to this date I know of no one who could actually play them as he intended. I believe the problem is in the direction of writing, top to bottom, left to right, right to left. Chirality (if you will forgive my use of the word) is statistical, even a matrix contains linear equations, personally I was born ambidextrous (both handed) but had to learn to conform to the right. I think science reinforces chirality through its use of language, yet I know of no culture that doesn't employ linearity in some way or another even if it is only through the tongue. The lungs are the closest thing to being ambidextrous. The heart is definitely biased. I haven't a clue about the brain, but scientists are uncovering biases every day now. Dialectics is inherently biased in what it reveals, a zen like lesson.

A bit off topic but I'm still interested in how one achieves a rational state from a strange attractor... According to my Green Grocer, the Romanesco appeared in England some years ago: What is it's true origin, tasting as it does like a cross between a cauliflower and broccoli?

Zen(0)'s Solution Fractal = lessons to be learned Rational state = lessons learned God(el)'s Solution The statement is false = fractal The statement is true = rational state

I will summarize my intuition on the subject having only coded a Mandelbrot set from a book without actually studying the maths. Hearsay tells me that the infiniteness of the reals leads to undecidability and indeterminism, nevertheless attractors exist. The question to my mind is what is the difference between a strange attractor and a simple attractor for want of a better word. My guess/mental download is that a strange attractor gives rise to a fractal whilst a simple attractor gives rise to a rational state. Comments.

Guilt is a word used without much thought, at most it is considered a base emotion, possibly in response to Catholic dogma or some other ideology. In fact it serves a very useful purpose in reminding one of one's separation. Sin is the separation of the human being from God, the splitting from the source, which is the meaning of the fall. Sin is not something inherently bad or wrong, it is simply a state of being, in separation from the almighty. Orthodox Christians seek to attain Theosis, union with God, which is also the meaning of Yoga, or so I am told. Guilt is the recognition that one has not attained such a state yet. Whether such a state is ever attainable whilst alive is debatable, as is the concept of death itself. Self-realisation, Theosis, Marriage, etc. are all ideals. The connection between the yi jing and astrology is well documented, it is not I who seeks to absorb but you as was indicated by the question mark, unless I misunderstood. Anger is a gift. Thank you.

Serotonin, can I ask a personal question; do you think I have anything of worth to teach; if any number bigger than one is just money and a coin has two sides what is the point;

So I am still trying to get my priorities sorted. In this information age it is tempting to want to buy and sell information or at least collect it and give it away as a profession. This is neither being a student nor a teacher, but a middle man, and thus pretty unfulfilling. I certainly don't want to be a political football, and being a referee is also quite daunting. What I want most is to have a family. I have noticed that many people here seem, at least from their writings, to dream of endless sex. This is not even animalistic, animals are far more sophisticated than mere sex machines. I am not really bothered by how much sex I have, there is a difference between short term pleasure and long term joy. Of course sex can be healthy, pleasure can be enjoyable and games can be fun, but raising a family is what brings true joy to my mind, that and being one with oneself which in a way boils down to the same thing. One of my teachers once told me I would be a perpetual student. I don't know if that is true. I am certainly happy with my life for the most part, leaving aside the nightmare scenarios I seem to keep experiencing on a regular basis, though even those can be exhilarating like a horror movie. I could possibly even learn to accept those as part of my life too, if they didn't leave me so confused afterwards and dysfunctional. At present, it seems to me that raising a family should follow a particular order, get into a secure position in life first, then meet the right woman, then settle down. However maybe this is not correct. I certainly couldn't financially raise a family at present on my own. So this is one of the things that I think I need to address. Also, I am not so young any more, and though I am a man, the clock still makes things difficult to some extent. I need to make some plans, rather than just be, at least that is how it seems to me. I is no harder nor easier to just go with the flow, just different. Structure is always there and always changing, and there are different ways of interacting with it. The eternal observer or stillness is something that I am often aware of, though to be honest I think that even the observer is always relative. Knowing that there is an observer who collapses the wave function, orders the world, and so on, gives me reassurance, but is no guarantee of pleasure, and that is something that many people have yet to learn. There can be joy in suffering, love in pain, these things are guaranteed by "God" if you want to call the observer that. However, the question of free will remains open. Thank you.

The Sun and the Moon possibly. Being "Greek" I tend to think of Asia as starting East of the Bosphorus though most of my relatives think of such a notion as being far too antiquated. Whether that makes Europe Western or Centric... My apologies.

I am not a fan of Wilhelm's translation, for English translations I tend to go to the rather eclectic selections of the Orientalist (sic) scholar Thomas Cleary, as well as original English commentary by authentic Taoist masters. I have yet to try and read any text of the oracle in traditional characters. FYI as I understand it the German philosopher Leibniz is often said to be the first European to study the Yi Jing, way before Wilhelm and Jung, and it is from his study that the European concept of binary was developed. Leibniz was a diplomat as well as a philosopher and mathematician, also designing machines for movement and computation. I do not know if he actually translated the oracle or simply observed the combinations of yin and yang, at any rate, I'm sure there were others before him who were aware of its existence. Quite why it is called the ICHING is beyond me, perhaps it simply means 10. Thank you.

Wyclif Jimmy gen anpil rivyè pou travèse; You can get it if you really wantsi; in dem na resh alla; shi bais u tai ji chan; shen do na timatoe; nagaste!

So I've noticed there is a lot of emphasis on beingness on this forum and not much on actual productivity which is why I came here in the first place. I am drawn back here for want of a better place to journal, but there's not much point if it's just going to be more about learning to go with the flow. I think I need to set up my aims in a private journal as I was doing before and journal here about issues that require some external energy. Sharing energy with peers is addictive and accomplishes little of any worth. However it can be fun, and a bit of fun in life is never a bad thing. In the information age of the creative commons there is a lot of desire to learn things by oneself without seeking out a teacher. Obviously, most people are here because of Leo's teachings, so perhaps that is not quite true, however the fact remains that the majority want to learn their own way. Perhaps it has always been like that, the difference being that now there is so much more information freely available. Information overload means that people prefer to learn techniques than facts. Indeed many people have ceased believing in facts altogether. This is dangerous. Without a consensus of facts, the structure breaks down, indeed there is no structure. It is impossible to live without structure, so facts are necessary, and in order to live with others a consensus of facts is necessary. I want to talk a little about the Jordan Curve Theorem which states "that every Jordan curve divides the plane into an "interior" region bounded by the curve and an "exterior" region containing all of the nearby and far away exterior points, so that every continuous path connecting a point of one region to a point of the other intersects with that loop somewhere." according to Wikipedia. The theorem is the basis of the standard proof of the four colour theorem amongst other things. The reason I raise it is for the issue of conflict and stability, movement and stillness. It is one of the many resolutions of the paradox of structure. The Jordan Curve Theorem is said to be one of the most rigorously tested theorems of any note in mathematics. My question is if it is the resolution of a paradox how does one jump to the next level? This I believe is a dangerous question, but perhaps it has a simple answer, simply move from a plane to a solid. I still haven't studied any of this in any great depth, these are just some initial thoughts that occur to me. At any rate, I will return to my private journal now and start to invest energy in structuring my life. Thank you.

Get up

£6

First off I would recommend learning the difference between light and white or dark and black, both have colour, but one is yin and the other yang, if that makes sense, and these are analogies used by many of the early quantum physicists. Once you have learned that you can turn to theories of time-travel, one such theory being about connecting "black" holes - read "dark" holes to "white" holes - read "light" holes, again, yin and yang. This is the frame work, turning it into maths is still an open question for many, be prepared to work through the pain on paper even if you get a scholarship, maths on a computer generally is more trouble than its worth, but you need to know how to do it to advance into academia. I currently teach according to the material means of the student, my teaching is mostly algebraic to do with management at this stage so is more likely to be what you are looking when you have completed a course on calculus.

There is a scattering of origins in divination, I generally use marbles not beans and I will explain why. Africa is certainly a paradise with it's only systems of consciousness. Life appears out of the void, space, moment. So what? Work? Slavery? Service? No, I am(Erica). I first came across the term "animism" in a direct comparison thread between "Shintoism" and "African religions (sic)" The apple certainly conveys pain. The point, cars, computers, rocks, crystals, trees, clouds, Ra, are alive. The example for those of a stupid inclination is that the Japanese believe this so much that they try to ensure their cars have happy faces. I'll quote Lester Young "that's alright for him". Or James Brown "I've got mine, don't worry about his". Both these quotes are a gift to the insecure from a scattered origin. There is a scattering of origins in divination, the theory of relative origins, trees to base what, see? Yes, it is radical, technology is the devil's invention, but everything lives. One world. Get real America!

So expressing the following correctly is giving me trouble, indeed I'd even almost like to say giving I trouble: My dad hasn't read my book, my mother neither. Somewhere at the beginning of it I wrote that in the process of self-inquiry I would have to get into "race" and was afraid. I am nothing, my skin has a tone, and I don't deny it resonates with certain frequencies. My hair too, my eyes, brown with a blue ring, even height and weight have resonance, a 1 in nine billion chance, some say. Reading other's posts, I have associated some interpretations, that my prejudice for associating myself with "black" came from my mother and not my father, though my "black" hair is supposedly the genetic results of the latter. Indeed it may even have come from my grandparents whose role it was to give me away. So back to the issue of excuses and being ashamed. "Why do I keep defining people by nationality" my father always asks me. It was not the association with "black" that my dad would be ashamed of but "Cypriot". My father has always said he was "British" if challenged which he excused by saying that Cyprus was still British when he left. I clung to the excuse. I am still debating whether to edit my work. Nothing is ever lost, change is a part of life, but being still is profound. I tend to agree that one should just accept what is produced in the moment. However, my path of misrepresenting unfortunately seems to continue. Women tend to gossip more than men I have noticed. Assumptions are made. It can be haram or halal like all things. I have heard that Muhammad (pbuh) used to watch all his words. For the record I do not claim to be anything of note without an insult of integrity, one of the things I regret, even nothing is too strong a word for I am I ka nage ni love da la sha ma lol That's supposed to be a joke Thank you,

So I emailed a few people about what they thought of my book and am still waiting for their responses. There's definitely some bits I don't like. Whether it needs editing or not is still an open question for me. I'm not going to make excuses, in fact I know that my father would be ashamed of me for many of the direct comparisons I wrote, but I write in the moment to satisfy my reality of the present time and space and obviously this cannot be without external/outer influences. I'm still considering kriya yoga, whether it's better than sitting meditating to in coffee shops like an old retired grandfather I don't know. To be honest, both are good. Returning to maths study is something I'm keen to do. It's been a long time since I've made any attempt to make serious music and I think that would also be a good way to relax. I've thought about trying to learn the proof of the four-colour theorem by applying Galois theory, but basically resisted because it is after all a boring theorem. I know a lot of people are obsessed with it, which is how the latest descent arose, and it still annoys me. Of course there is North, South, East and West, but there is also a fucking war in the centre at least for the time being. I guess there is always a war going on and people always die. That is one of the things I don't like about the little I know about Buddhism. "Life is suffering" is not wrong, but I prefer to ease others pain without taking it on myself, which is the opposite of the Catholic philosophy I think. Just give energy and positive vibes or something. Journaling in a more public space than one's hard drive was supposed to help me to focus on staying disciplined, which it was up until Christmas. Ultimately it led to a great deal of indiscipline and I think I need to return to journaling alone, maybe even using pen and paper as many elderly people do, though I don't think I'm ready for that. I'd like to say thank you to all the posts on the forum that inform rather than debate. Many thanks. Gog