mmKay

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Everything posted by mmKay

  1. May be a no-brainer but if you are down for some proactive procrastination you can check out Leo's posts history, starting from the very first one. Found many many gems there. https://www.actualized.org/forum/profile/1-leo-gura/?do=content&page=830
  2. pin this thread to the first page please!
  3. Hey, have you heard of vanlife? Basically you purchase a car / van, make it somewhat livable and live travelling without paying for rent. If you are a frugal person and have the savings you could go a good year or more just doing the inner work or focusing on whatever you'd like. just my 2 cents .
  4. Huh quite freaky. I've been working on understanding what my LP could be for quite long and what you wrote here looks like something copy-pasted from my own journal tbh Spongebob and Rick and morty are two of my inspirations as well ( As well as Cyanide and Happniess, Avatar, and various animes ) . If you enjoy Futurama and the Simpsons as well, i recommend you this three part interview with Matt Groening. Quite inspiring . Animation has such a huge potential not only creatively but also to impact mankinds consciousness and evolution. Congrats on your discovery btw My two cents here, If you find yourself slacking, backsliding, not progressing or just getting bummed out, check out the LP course. It will set the right expectations, lay out the big picture and help you with keeping on track. Remember these from Morpheus in the Matrix? Anyways, good luck !
  5. If that isn't a proof for aliens right under our nose i dont know what is lol. ( Yeah, another Kurzgesagt vid, but damn)
  6. I know Leo specifically said not to spam him with theories of what his condition may be but I resonated way too much with his health situation so I wanted to give my 2 cents. I'll keep it short. I have chronic fatigue, chronic sinus peoblems, cold limbs and probably thyroid problems ( yet undiagnosed) , issues with stuffy nose and ears thay are " Imaginary" as my many doctors said after paying hundreds of dollars, and extreme mental and physical fatigue after eating carbs. I'm suposed to have a chronic alergic reaction to something unknown. Also, fasting aliviates all of this INMENSELY. So. I' ve had a long history of living in places and closed rooms with mold on the walls / on the roof/ bathroom, etc. Mold sends out spores into the air. You breathe them in. They grow inside of you. They are resistant bastards nd tough to get rid of. They are undetectable in many standard tests and mainstream medicine ignores them completely. They feed off of your food, mostly carbs ( fungi eat sugar) . Idk if you have looked into this, but since you never mentioned i thought it could be of value to you. https://www.amazon.com/Toxic-Toxicity-Multiple-Sensitivities-Environmental-ebook/dp/B07H72N9RH A book on this condition that i've been recommended by someone fighting the same condition. Im late to work, sorry for sloppy writing. Good luck!
  7. I used to get real insights from Elliot Hulsex but he has regressed so much : Quite long video yes, but I challenge you not to facepalm no more once than 10 min. Quite deep regression, that seems to be the end of his development given how deep, assertive and pushing he is in his worldview.
  8. Here is a video for y'all who are broke, love travelling and are into frugal living. Also its good for minimizing your expenses and getting free time to focus on life purpose. Also check out his youtube channel. Check out Vanlife movement in google, as well as Carlife. Also This channel on Alternative housing :
  9. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperparasite#:~:text=A hyperparasite is a parasite,) and Coleoptera (beetles). Imagine a parasite hooked on a parasite hooked on a parasite hooked to the first parasite.
  10. I was going to apply but in middle of my essay I noticed that I was just doing it for the social status of having a green name tag lol. * Chimp mode off *
  11. Cat triggered by whipping tail triggered because of being triggered by whipping his tail
  12. Running late to work, but wanted to share this before. Seems amazing for short distance travel. Literally 0 emmisions. Thoughts?
  13. Leos video on meaning value and purpose, and contemplation. Broke my shit for two years
  14. May seem simple but this helped me out beyond words and may have saved my life. Let go of the " NEED TO KNOW " . ( Not saying don't ask questions, not reading books, etc ) But let go of the CLINGINESS, ATTACHMENT to an anwser like you are used to getting before. One-dimensional, explicit, non-paradoxical. Acept NOT KNOWING. There is a deep state of peace and inner silence that you get into when you embrace NOT KNOWING as a valid state of being. What am I? Why does life exist? What's the point of life? what is the fundation of existance ?? So many open threads. So many possibilities. So many unknown factors. When you start thinking and thinking and don't get to any convicing anwsers, you will feel pain, confusion and worse. But then it hits you. OOH!!! I don't KNOW!! I DONT KNOW! AND I NEVER KNEW!! I was just hiding in unconscious uninquired assumptions of reallity, of myself and worldview paradigms. And it was giving you , my favorite word of all time : Pseudo-safety. The illusion of safety. And it's okay!! Woah, I'm so astonished. I'm so amazed. I have no words. Reallity is so misterious!! What the hell? How didin't I see this before?!! Reallity seems magical. What the f^ck. HOW IS ANYTHING POSSIBLE? And that's the place you want to stay in. Not knowing is not bad. It's not stupid. It's not demeaning as our culture pushes on us . Not knowing is a superior state of being. Of openness for hypothesis. Of oppenness for direct, personal experimentation. You can ultimately only ground yourself in Actuallity, direct experience. And that's where you get deeper and deeper into spirituallity. You may want to read The book of Not Knowing by Peter Ralston. Good luck!
  15. @JessiChell ofc it's alright. The insight is that ONLY when you accept yourself , you can change. You certainly will change nothing by repressing and guilting yourself. Love any "unwanted" aspect of your life to death. Repeat with me . When you accept yourself, you change. Repeat again. Step 2 is doing it at an emotional level. I feel like I undersold the exercise I just told you in last post. It is LITERALLY the anwser to all of your suffering, since it is self-inflicted. You won't think your way out of anything. You must feel your deepest triggers and release them with Love, maybe several times. It literally is the anwser to all of your suffering. But this is as far as I can help out. You gotta do the rest. On the other hand, what do I know, I'm writing this in my underwear cos its like 33º here
  16. Wanted to add this Youtube Channel under the exact same category. This guy has over 100 one hour long precise beautifully laid out summaries of quality personal development books. Enjoy. Look at the playlist of " Study notes " for the gold, not just random videos of his.
  17. @Leo Gura Little experience in relationships is one of my weak point so this may mostly be armchair philosphy but i'd like to hear your take on this "insight " : Long story short, I used to have a massive crush on a girl and it would drive me nuts, make me depressed and feel extremely jealous when I saw her with other guys, making out with them even imagining her having sex with others. It was a real source of suffering for me . I even imagined scenarios where we would be together but she cheated on me with my best friend or even family members, which would make me suffer even more. Yes , I used to be a monumental SIMP lol. But my intuition tells me girls also obsess over guys in this excessive creative way, so maybe this will help you in some way @JessiChell Before I say anything , yes, you could argue that these are just imagination and mental exercises, but I feel there is a ton of value in experiencing this in a Mind, Body and Feelings - emotions Visualization exercise and fully accepting it, rather than simply discarding it as " but this won't work in an actuall real-life scenario" etc. And I'd be willing to play devil's advocate and say that the potential for growth is as just as high as going through the actual real life experience. So, a huge release came when I applied detachment , Love and acceptance to those imagination exercises. In real time, from one second to the another I felt this overwhelming sense of release and letting go. What I did was Imagine all these things that make me suffer, see them in my minds eye and feel them in my body, and deeply come to peace with them. Accept them, embrace them and fully love them. Basically accepting that I'm resisting those things and proceding to fully accepting them happening. I Imagined many many possible scenarios that would make me suffer, like she hooking up with my brother, or with my best friend, or she getting gangbanged and enjoying it, etc etc ( feel free to substitute these for your personal painful imaginations , the richer and more detailed the better ) And I couldn't belive it! it was such a huge weight of my shoulders. Suddenly I was okay with all of these scenarios. I was completely open to the ideas of open relationships, polygamy, threesomes and even tag teaming her with my friends ( mentioning these because they specially triggered me ). I was okay with she being with me and also she not being with me. I feel like that's where the actual jump happens from "Codependency - She needing to be with me and me needing to be with her "- " Independence one not needing the other, but in a repressive way of not being able to open up or not wanting to get hurt , and finally interdependence where both are fine with whatever happens and are free to leave whenever they want and still being open, loving and fully taking in the experience of eachother Most likely pragmatically such things would hinder healthy relationships or would requiere unrealistic base level of consciousnesness and detachment from both sides for it to work, but I really wish you develop the skill to experience this. It's so beautiful and so amazing to be free of such suffering, and realizing that it was self-inflicted all along. You may look into Byron Katie books or her YouTube channel for a simple 1-2-3 formula, but the real growth is made at the level of deep feeling into your emotions and triggers. Good luck!
  18. Tai Chi Singing Improv speaking off the cuff ring training photoshop is one i fell in love with obseving wild plants, how they are similar, how they are different, what insects live on them, how their flowers look, how they smell, what their texture is. I was completely mind blown when I discovered about Aphids in my garden weeds self massage and foam rolling Speaking in tongues Making myself laugh with ridiculous ideas biking in nature <3 learning basic car mechanics and electricity. Im 22 and I didnt know how a wall socket works. Also, research youtube in other languages. most likely you are suck in the recomendations in your own language. Translate something you want to look into into russian, german, spanish, french etc and follow the rabbit hole. Quite eye opening. for chinese you may need VPN
  19. ?? jump on second hand websites . lots of people upgreat their pc and sell their 2019 pc dirt cheap, or just go to some friend with a great PC and pay him 10€ to let you play for a whole day and get your fix, something along these lines. if gaming is what you want to keep doing. for me what helped was realizing that every time i sit at my PC to play League of Legends, I'm just skipping time, nothing else. This exact moment and situation I find myself in, I will stay in, for as long as I keep playing. So imagine yourself at 25, playing Cyberpunk 2077. then yourself at 35, playing cyberpunk 2088. then yourself at 45 playing cyberpunk 2099. In the same house. in the same job. with the same friends. etc. this may help you to get some leverage. If not, that's okay. the desire to change must come from within. " guilt " may be used as leverage but only deep intrinsic inspiration will get you some sort of transformation
  20. I'm sick since yesterday. Been working on exposed sun for pretty much two days and dealing with close contact with really dirty materials and air ( mold, tons of dust, sewer gasses and rat feces ) . I got a quite pulsating headache. Nothing too serius but : Two years ago undergoing really heavy emotional pain ( Dark night of the soul ) mixed with some Kriya yoga and Byron Katie exercises I discovered that I'm able to bliss out on command, no matter what the circumstances. The idea is, I get very present, I surrender to the experience , and then I accept it completely. I radiate Love from inside out , imagining like an aura coming from inside of my chest towards my surrounding, just as router " radiates " wifi signals from the inside out . Woke up at 5 am. I found myself resisting the headache, and I had the idea to flip it. I surrendered the idea of the headache being " bad ", and the idea of there even being such thing as an "headache" besides a "sensation" in the forehead area, . Then I put my attention on that physical aspect of the headache and focused on " experiencing it fully" and embracing it as much as possible . I started feeliing how it's fading in real time. For 5 minutes it was gone pretty much completely. But later on It comes back, in a quite softer way. Pretty sure I'm able to re-create the experience multiple times more . I had the ah-ha moment of this being what is actually ment by lower case "self-healing" . I imagine there is much, much much more depth to this. Also, the kind of energy that I manifest by "blissing out on command" feels so real, so empowering, so light. Many times I get the chills up my spine when I do it . It makes me feel so "Complete". Maybe this is what Charlie Goldsmith is doing with his touch-healing. Idk if his things are BS or not, but I'm open to the idea, just in the same way that if you put both of your fingers in the electricity sockets, electricity will FLOW THROUGH YOU and you will be electrocuted. Well ?. Is this the essence of healing ?
  21. @Even Hessen Thanks for the feedback. Interesting, will check all of that out.
  22. This is the excerpt I was talking about from the very beggining of Maslow's book. We have, each of us, an essential biologically based inner nature, which is to some degree " natural, " intrinsic, given, and in a certain limited sense, unchangeable, or at least, unchanging. Each person's inner nature is in part unique to himself. It is possible to study this inner nature scientificallt and to discover what it is like --- " not invent, -- discover " This inner nature, as much as we know of it so far, seems not to be intrinsically evil, but rather either neutral or positively " good " . What we call evil behaviour appears most often to be a secondary reaction to frustration of this intrinsic nature . Since this inner nature is good or neutral rather than bad, it is best to bring it out and to encourage it rather than to supress it. If it is permited to guide our life, we gro healthy, fruitful and happy. If this essential core of the person is denied or supressed, he gets sick sometimes in obvious ways, sometimes in subtle ways, sometimes immediately, sometimes later. This inner nature is not strong and overpowering and unmistakable like the instincs of animals. It is weak and delicate and subtle and easily overcome by habit, cultural pressure and wrong attitudes toward it. Even though weak, it rarely dissapears in the normal person- perhaps not even in the sick person. Even though denied, it persists underground forever pressing for actualization. Somehow, these conclusions must all be articulated with the neccesity of discipline, deprivation, frustration, pain and tragedy. To the extent that these experiences reveal and foster and fulfill our inner nature, to that extent they are desirable experiences. Also, check out Leo's majestic video on Happiness : Lastly, once you start running on Feeling more than on Thought, all of the traits of " Self-Actualization" of this post start to fall into place :