Nichts

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About Nichts

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    Netherlands
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    Male
  1. Glad to hear it helped. Wish you all the best!
  2. Hey Eric, I recognize some of these tendencies in me too, although less severe. What you're describing fits a lot of the checkboxes of the avoidant attachment style (avoiding closeness and intimacy, not relying on others for support) I'll attach a checklist here so you can check to what extent it fits your experience: I took it from this website which I highly recommend reading: https://www.attachmentproject.com/blog/avoidant-attachment-style/ I used to struggle a lot (and still do to some extent) with connecting with other people, socially and romantically. I tried many different things to work with this (Radical Honesty, Nonviolent Communication, Pick-up, psychedelics, visualization, meditation, etc.) and they all helped a little bit but I felt they didn't quite address the underlying issue. What really changed things around for me was learning about my attachment style, and what's behind my tendencies to pull away from others. What I realized about myself is that I actually was afraid of closeness because I expected that if I let anybody close to me, they would hurt and abandon me. I was basically putting on a band-aid before I could even get hurt; rejecting others before they could reject me. That's my experience. I don't know if that is what's going on for you. To get more clarity on what your individual sticking-points are, it might help to take a quick test to get clear on your attachment style: https://quiz.attachmentproject.com/ . Although online tests are of course not super accurate, but it's better than nothing. What I do practically to work on this is the Ideal Parent Figure protocol developed by Daniel P Brown. It's been a life-saver for me; maybe you'll find it useful too. I'll attach some links here: Introduction to the exercises: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QMtS8DUmdwM The actual exercises: https://www.integralsomaticawakening.com/resources Lastly, be kind to yourself. Even though it might be hard to see it now, there are VERY god reasons for your behavior, and beating yourself up for it is just going to make everything worse. Hope that helps.
  3. In the last few weeks, I've had this underlying longing for crying. It's not that I'm particularly sad about anything, it's just that I would like to feel the whole palette of human emotions. And I've heard from some people that they had some powerful emotional releases after watching particular movies. So I'm curious: Which movies habe you seen that touched you deeply and triggered an emotional response in you?
  4. @Dand Thank you. I'm glad to hear that I'm not alone. And yes, time will heal. I just want it to happen more quickly. I've had about a dozen smaller doses since then, and a few powerful experiences since then, and the fear is still there. Thanks for the tip with journalling. I might try it out. @electroBeam You're right. I don't think the experience was "bad" in any way, and it is more normal than my "normal" state. And still, that doesn't change the fact that I have a giant fear of ever going there again. @Member I think the scariest thing was how irreversible it felt. If you use the analogy of a video game: It felt like I somehow glitched my way out of that video game called life, and then accidentally broke the computer. And that the game (my life, all of existence) would be forever broken and glitchy.
  5. Hey guys and girls, For about the last 6 months, I'm having problems with going deep when taking DMT. It all started when I had my first (and til now only) breakthrough experience 6 months ago. I was overwhelmed by it and had a strong ego backlash: Thinking that I kind of "broke" something in my psyche and being scared that I would never be able to return back to "normal". Since then, every time I'm smoking DMT, I have this resistance that keeps me from going deep. Whereas before my breakthrough I could just relax into the experience and let it take me where it wanted me to go, now always fears come up and I try to cling to my "normal state". I would so love to have this ease again that I had before my breakthrough, just being able to relax and go deep. Has anybody gone through something similar and has any tips for dealing with this resistance?
  6. Let me introduce Travel Bum. I've stumbled over this guy a few months ago and I'm just amazed by how present and loving he seems. He combines nondual teachings and shadow work with seduction. I think this is some next level stuff. Far beyond regular pick-up and even beyond the "natural schools". A lot of his teaching still goes over my head but it makes intuitive sense to me. Often, you might have to watch his videos a few times to get the point. A few years back, he had a very popular series called the travel bum show where he traveled around the world and dated women along the way. Not that many profound teachings in there but very beautiful to watch.
  7. You might have a point there. Still, I can't imagine that the media or scientists would hide or fail to report such an important fact. Why is every credible media source saying that it's not as lethal if you're young? There must be some other factor that we're not seeing here.
  8. @electroBeam This might be a factor that plays into it. And I don't think it's the only one. You saying that age effect is a small factor is speculation. I'm pretty sure that scientists take things like this into account when they calculate a death rate.
  9. Where did you get this information? This site which takes their numbers from the WHO, says otherwise: https://www.worldometers.info/coronavirus/coronavirus-age-sex-demographics/ @Leo Gura I read the article. Couldn't find anything about it being that dangerous for young people. This site right here speaks of 5% severe or critical cases.
  10. Yeah, I know that. I was surprised that exactly this number was this high. I thought that out of the people with the virus, the portion of people with severe symptoms would be smaller. Especially for young people. Because that's what I'm told from all sides: "You will most likely survive the virus but stay inside to protect the old and vulnerable"
  11. I'm a bit confused. In Leo's latest blog post, he writes that 20% of severe cases are people between 20 and 44. This is the first time I'm hearing this info. What I've heard before is that Corona is mostly dangerous for old people and that most young people just get flu-like symptoms. Any thoughts on this? Do you know some sources that I don't know which share these numbers?
  12. Thanks for all of you guys' answers. I decided against doing the bootcamp.
  13. @Spiral thank you! What do you mean with "PD" online course?
  14. Hey everyone, I'm about to make a decision about a big sum of money and could really use some second opinions. So, I've found this 3- day Daygame/Pick up boot camp in a city near me which starts a few months from now. I'm very excited about it and would very much like to go there. The thing that got me thinking though, is the fact that it costs $3000. Right now, I am 19 years old and studying. I have a decent amount of savings (the price for the boot camp is about 15% of my savings), so I could pay for the boot camp if I wanted to. It still is a hell lot of money and I don't know if it is worth it. And yet, I can think of a lot of reasons for why attending the boot camp might be a very good idea: I just really want to make progress in that area of my life. Flirting and also social skills in general have always been a weak spot for me and I would really like to fix that. I know that I can also make progress in dating through others means than the boot camp but I am scared that this might take a long time and that I'll be bothered with doing pick-up for the next few years with only slowly making progress. For example, my new year's resolution for this year was to get better with girls and do lots of cold approaches. And in the end, I ended up doing only around 20 (!) approaches during the entire year til now. It's really frustrating to not live up to my expectations and I am scared of having a few more years like this one, where I tell myself that I will make progress, but in the end, I barely do. I'd like to get this area of my life handled as quickly as possible so I can move on to more meaningful things like life purpose, committed relationships, or spirituality. I'm actually already becoming sick of that pick-up stuff, and at the same time, I think that this is a phase that you have to go through in order to go further. Right now, even though I would like to be in a serious relationship, I imagine that I'm not ready for that yet. I think that I first need to date a decent amount of girls to get to know myself better, see what kinds of girls I like, what's important to me in a relationship, and to get more comfortable with my own sexuality. I think that the earlier I get this area of my life handled, the more benefits I will get in the long term. Almost like a compound effect. My life purpose involves, among other things, Nonviolent Communication (NVC). This will most likely be my domain of mastery. And one of the best ways to practice NVC is by being in a relationship. So, I imagine it to be like this: The earlier I get into a committed relationship, the earlier I'll be mastering NVC, therefore the earlier I can actualize my life purpose. It's still a LOT of money Do any of you guys have experience with dating boot camps? Would you say it was worth it for you? I've also considered doing an only course instead but I'm worried that I might just not take enough action if I don't have somebody in person pushing me. Also, on a boot camp, you get feed-back from your coaches which I think can save you a lot of time and effort. What's your experience with online courses? (How much) Did you benefit from them?
  15. I had the same problem. Felt stressed at every driving lesson and seriously doubted my abilities. I think I needed like 60 hours til I got my driver's license. So, compared to me, you're still doing well Meditation can help with stress and anxiety but I suppose you already know that. People are not equally talented at everything. Just because you're having difficulties learning to drive doesn't mean you're stupid. It might just mean that you need more time than the average person. That's ok! Don't beat yourself up for it. See it as a growth opportunity. This is a great exercise in mindfulness and managing your emotions. See your driving lessons as a mental workout. If you keep working on it deliberately you will succeed eventually.