Identity

It went really well. We had a good time talking, and I still felt a fysical attraction to her, but it became clear to me that I did not have a desire to be in a relationship with her. I told her that I had liked her for a long time, and we discussed that. After that we talked some more, and left as friends. ?

I need to figure it out by meeting with her. i haven’t been with her 1 on 1 since a long time, and in that time I have changed so much, and so will she have. There is no need to make any romantic gestures, however I do need to be authentic in my expression towards her. If there are vibes, there are vibes. If I in that moment feel like I need to tell her something, than I should not supress that feeling. My throath chakra has been the biggest blockage from being real with her. Any supression from that department or inauthenticity is what I should try to overcome.

Is it something I need to figure out before the dat, or can I use the date to figure it out?

I dont know what I want. That’s the problem right there. That’s what I need to find out.

I like fearless (youtube channel and website) a lot. Also Zan Perrion and especially his book the alabaster girl is great. Both stage greenish perspectives I would say. love the way of the superior man as well.

All I can tell you is, I recently transitioned from stage orange to stage green, and it really fucked with my sexuality. I think because stage green is much more introspective and in touch with feeling you have to face a lot of things you suppressed in stage orange. In stage orange I would just push down any feelings of insecurities and go at it. This resulted for me in pretty bad sex, not feeling a lot, and finding it hard to come. These problems have now largely been resolved, but it took me around half a year of not having any results with girls whatsoever, and not being able to express my desires, because I could actually feel my fears. Just saying that this might be a sign of growth rather than a problem. Probably you have to face some things through and be much more vulnerable during sex. I would suggest to keep listening to yourself and find a girl with whom you are comfortable, perhaps can even tell your issue to. Hope that helps

I was just thinking about IQ, as I've found @Leo Gura talking about its unimportance and delutedness. Than I had this idea that maybe it's not completely useless, but it is highly specific to the values and goals you have in mind. So for example, for stage orange IQ tests might be very valuable. If you are to assume that in this reality you are very important, and it is very important for you to build mental models to manipulate the environment to your preference, IQ might be a pretty important measure of someone's ability to do that. It's one of multiple measures maybe, but quite useful. (Forgetting maybe the question of how one gets to an IQ level). If you are an investment banking company, building software to exploit "inaccuracies" from the market according to some complex calculations, on some Suits type shit, would you rather have the guy who scored high or low on the IQ test? I know I am choosing the latter. However, looking at it from a stage green perspective where you are trying to maximize love, acceptance, community, etc. It makes much less sense; Just open your heart and accept each other, we will figure it out together! No need to put people in categories guys, or girls, or whatever you want to be called! How unfear those poor low IQ scored people have grown up, let's give them a hug. Stage yellow, I would think; how can we optimize this system we call society and bring it to a better performing level? IQ tests are a flimsy surface level tool which we will probably not use, or use as a very partial perspective, to make this shit happen. Or, as I try to understand, from a turquoise perspective, as moving parts of consciousness. IQ test? What the hell are you talking about? Get on that meditation cushion real quick, and plan a 5-meo session whilst you are at it.

This question just hit me. I was thinking about understanding things. What got really clear to me us the understanding by BEING. What is hard for me to grasp is the relationship between BEING something and symbolically understanding what something is. Like language, models, pictures, whatever. They seem to arise to me at these moments. But what is going on here? Where does this come from? How to actually evaluate whether anything is accurate? People have idea's all the time. Also, those ideas might come from what they perceive to be god-like states of consciousness. What instrument of evaluation can you use to make any of what is arising? Rationality? But is a partial perspective? Does not account for the whole, but where does it usefulness end and the delusion start? Intuition? What do you know about intuition? When is it some true intuition and not when are you deluding yourself? How will you evaluate the difference, by using some thought process? pictures/symbols? Some kind of picture the mind present and enters with a lot of noise? How the hell do you even understand what that is?

Just had this idea, wanted to share and see what others think. Comedy and laughing is an important component, or maybe more a tool, for spirituality. Through these activities you learn to take yourself a lot less serious, it detaches you from identification and giving overly importance to stuff.

@oMarcos

@Leo Gura Directly, through Being? Or also symbolically? Or am I creating an artificial duality between the two?

@outlandish Thanks for sharing, ordered it right away!

@Leo Gura well yeah, I guess im with you on that. But then again thats mostly just because I trust your views. And thats mostly because your reasoning makes sense to me. When I get out there and brave these kind of debates myself, I find it hard to evaluate whats true. Especially if reasoning flies out the window as well, what do I have left. I guess what Im starting to realize more and more is that I actually dont know shit ?

@Serotoninluv I dont have any of the evidence. What I mean is people like Stefan Malineux refering to evidence in general. so in this video for example, he is like: There is a correlation in iq tests.. bla bla. im like yup, yep sounds about right. then hes like, have had experts pro and con on my podcast. im like, oh, really? Thats open-minded. Then he talks about how he incourages viewers to send him counter-arguments. im like, oh, thats pretty self-reflective! Then, all of a sudden, I walk away thinking black people are worth less than white people. (Overexageration ofcourse).

@Serotoninluv That makes a lot of sense. For someone making an argument about genetic differences, there is talked very little about genes indeed lol. I find it hard to argue against these types of belief systems though that build up rational arguments and refer to evidence. I find it very hard to not get into black and white thinking, either fully accepting their frameworks, or fully ignoring and judging them. Especially when I am talking with friends about this stuff. its like building a tower one brick at a time. Every brick seems to lay pretty well on the one beneath, but then when you look at the whole tower its crooked as fuck ?

@Leo Gura Hmm, but in the video he says that it has been tested even when black kids are grown up in a white urban family, with the same culture and economic situation, their results on iq tests are lower than white kids in that same situation. Also, he says its reflected in their “physical” brain size. If these facts are accurate, which I dont know if they are, would that not undermine your argument? It could just be that different strands of people evolved differently, allowing them to tap into reality in different ways? If you would change my genes, or change my brain, that will also have a big impact on my experience and performance in the world, right? Ps. I’m playing the devils advocate here, I would usually defend your side of the argument.

@mandyjw Im sorry, but ive got no idea what you are getting at

I never heard of Stefan Molyneux before, so I decided to look him up. I watched about the first 15 minutes of this video, where he talks about the iq differences in races and how they explain the differences in societal outcomes, such as income, genetically rather than environmentally. now, I understand this to be a very difficult topic, and that there are a lot of assumptions brought to the table here, as well as a lot of interpretations of what consequences these scientific findings have. However, “the basic facts”, the observations, that people grouped on certain characteristics perform differently on a test, seems hard to argue with. And than if that test seems to be an accurate predictor of other outcomes.. is there than not a truth to the “genetical” explenation of differences in societal outcomes? Without than coming up with arguments what that means for society, isnt that accurate? I notice myself getting extremely confused as I think about this topic. Intuitively I feel like an ideology is being presented here. However, I cant see where it begins and ends, as I feel there is also a partial truth to it.

@Leo Gura survival for whom? Why? Is it necessary for there to be something that observes?

If it is just being, how come I am experiencing struggle? If I experience struggle, that means it is true right, because it is? How can there be illusion if all there is is truth? Why cant I just let go, why does there have to be a process?

Its all just pointing to one thing, but why then is there this struggle? Why cant it just be?

@Nahm Wow, that just made so much sense to me. Thank you for sharing.

So, overall my life is going really well I would say. I feel like I have a nice direction going and am growing a lot. On a daily basis I feel great, see an increasing amount of beauty, and yeah, well I’m doing just fine. However, I do experience ego backlashes on a regular basis. I would say once a week/two weeks I have this day where I just can’t get anything done. I feel like if I don’t watch bullshit on youtube and eat junk food, like I am burning. Like I can’t handle the light of awareness or something. It makes me just want to scream. The video where Hitler reacts to non-duality resonates a lot with me in this situation haha. I don’t think it’s just spirituality, more a combination of every way I am trying to grow. Sometimes it just feels like I need to get so much done, and that it has to happen right now. I am 22 years old and it just seems that I need to find my life purpose right now, get better with girls and relationships, be social, get good habits, etc. At the same time that I have gotten pretty deep into spirituality. My back has also started to hurt in the last half a year. It’s this really annoying feeling, like I want to crack it or move it in some way, but it won’t go away. I’m not sure if this is related at all, but it seems to get worse at times of highs and lows. Now, I know that ego-backlashes and suffering and stuff is part of the journey. But a few days ago I had a dream in which I was driving a car, and for some reason, the breaks were not functioning properly. They were working slightly, but the car was still gaining speed. So I was trying desperately to break, and keep the car on the road. I ended up crashing. Usually, I don’t do much with dreams, but this one stuck to me. I looked it up and some sites suggested it meant I was losing control. Anyways, I am not exactly sure what I want from anyone responding, since I think it’s hard to judge my situation from the outside. Just wanted to put it out there I guess, and express it, since I don’t have a lot of people to talk to about this stuff. Thanks for reading! ?

@bejapuskas Thank you for your reply yeah, defininetly have the idea that things have to go to perfect, and very quickly as well. Indeed, Ive got a morning routine going, as well as other habits. However, at my bad days these tend to fly out the window, at least some. Reframing the ego backlash will definetely help. I tend to get into victim mindset a lot as well.. ”PS. Who is going too hard” mehh not today ? I will go meditate for a bit though!

@Peo I think there can be value in communicating about your non-dual pursuit and belief systems to other people. I don't know how far along you are, but for me it started as just beliefs and theory. At this stage you still have a very persistent sense of self, just your identity and perspective on the world changes. At this point I mostly kept to myself because with every conversation I tried to start about this type of stuff I pushed people further away. This however created problems for me because it created this rift between what I thought and felt and what I said and did, for which I felt increasingly inauthentic. This closed down my throat chakra. I had to work quite a bit to restore this balance again. Not sure in what position you are and what is wise to do for you, just wanted to share my experience so you are aware that not talking about it can produce some problems. I like welcometoreality's approach: talk about it in a way other people can relate or understand a bit. For me the dream metaphor and virtual reality worked all right. Also, writing your views out can help.