Angelite

Congratulations all. I am in a mode of wordlessness. The more I understand, the more that i've become silence. It is kinda overwhelming. Thanks all, each & everyone who have been the catalyst to my thinking process. I've been trying to put it into words but is kinda impossible.... If I were to explain one thing, then I will have to explain all, if not then it will only results in more confusions..... I've tried but it's too interconnected with everything else.... Once you've explain one facet, then there's no turning back haha...you have to explain all or else the meaning won't be transmitted. I respect all gurus who can speak in a language that everyone would understand. To find that perfect balance is hard. To get it's real meanings across to every minds. I think the best gurus are those who can effortlessly gets it's message across despite the huge audience/minds. Leo, only if I could tell you how much your new insights (be it written or in the video) , interconnected with everything that i've known for the past weeks &months&prior.....haha you may not realized it because I don't post here that often, but it feels like were on the same wavelength. You have the experience, but I know it by knowledge & perceptions. Of course experience is expensive(harder to achieve), but knowledge is broader I would say. A bigger perspective. For me, it is the matter of experiencing what i've already known by knowledge. When it is not contradictory to someone else's experiences, I know I am on the right Path. That's how I view everything. But I also see where things got confused. Joseph, don't tell me to transcend my mind yet. I love my mind, it's crazy & is interconnected with everything else in my perceptions haha(even someone else's!) . I had fun making sense of things~ For me, it's like this : From Knowledge to Wisdom.? Though for the past weeks it has become a bit overwhelming. Not in a bad way. Just a bit too much clarity tht i've become like this : . . . . . . . . . Following my Curiosity, Stumbled upon Knowing, Impossible to Share. I literally stop taking in more infos for the past week & try to extract what ive known....but it's kinda not possible. I can't find the middle path yet. As in, not short and not all. #shoutouttoallgurus!

Oh yeahh it’s been a long time~Last week I went back to my hometown to visit my family for the new year holiday. And now I've been busy with other programme this few days. I wanna share the latest insights with the latest guru that I've met. Who give me like a closure to my searching phase, aka convince me to start on practicing. Haha. I've written some in my journal but couldn't write properly because I've been busy. The main point that I've learned from him is to be really down to earth...He reminds us to be good to our parents, our friends and everyone else...To treat everyone with love and mercy. Who are we to be proud anyway? We're only Creations. 10/1/2019 Okay. I wanna tell a story that kinda complete my first post/searching/learning phase before I am convinced to take action(finally haha). Yesterday, I’ve met with another guru. I don’t know if he is a sage or a mystic or an auliya, but talking to him was really fun. It’s such a pity that we had to go back when we’re so into it as he excitedly shares more wisdom. He gave satisfying answers, in fact I know so much from him, he really do have a lot of fun wisdom to tell. And I’ve found the answer to my first question about the soul oh yeah!^^ . I went with my younger bro~ He even gifted us with his book on how to get closer to God. *btw I wrote this when the experience is still fresh & I'm kinda excited, but that's all I'm writing. Been busy. Now it got slightly different feel as more insights started to make sense.. 13/1/2019 These are some of the things we talk about. I asked him a lot haha. Looking at everything around us, should remind us of God. Everything is a reflection of Truth.Everything is for us to see the wisdom behind it. To understand the wisdom behind everything around us... For example, The animals…are a reflections of human behavior/characteristic. (to be precise, the characteristic of our soul/spirit) For example: A snake is a reflection of a characteristic of a human who is sly. A scorpion is a reflection of deception. It can attack you anytime from behind. When you least expected it. Then he told us of the origin of monkey…it is…actually a human. But was cursed and it turns into a monkey. (snake too is a by product of a curse). I don’t know if it’s only one species or all coming from the same roots(all apes family or just one species). But again, here there is a translation that I am confused about. Idk. But it’s true. Because an auliyaa will never lie. Never… And as we talk about all these, I kinda wondered what am I then?(my reflection in the animal kingdom~). And this thought popped out~ I am a horse. The soul of a horse~ hahahhaha. But it’s true. That’s why whenever I saw an open field/horizon, I always feel like I wanna run. That urge to run freely....it is irresistable~ can’t help it either~ The same feeling that I got while skating downhill. Or running downstairs. Or even figure skating. That passion, that feeling of complete freedom^^. Just looking at horses made me feel free..... I miss my childhood, where horses are everywhere haha. But now it’s a bit limited… I think my spirit is those of a horse….haha ok I’ll stop now. Next, he told me of how a human being should never be proud and arrogant. We all should live together and love one another as we’re all are actually dependent on one another. From the beginning to the end**…Meeting with an auliyaa really teach me a lot. I’m sorry everyone if I’ve ever be arrogant knowingly or unknowingly. I genuinely apologize if I’ve ever made anyone feel bad about themselves or if I’ve hurt anyone’s feelings knowingly or unknowingly. And I wanna thank everyone who had answered my questions and everyone who had made me think. I really have grown so much since my first post. And learn a lot. May God bless all of you and give His Guidance and Mercy to all sincere seeking soul. Talking to a guru face to face really leave a long lasting effect. It really humbled you down a lot. And without getting into actualized.org , I’d still wouldn’t care about Truth. Thanks Leo. And everyone who made me think. I hope for all to find TRUTH. Sincerely, Angelite 13/1/19 **He explain the origin of human being,There are two aspect, the physical and the non-physical(soul). Physically we are from Adam, but our soul is a different thing. It’s non physical. And about why human being shouldn’t be arrogant. Because who are we without others? What is others and everything without God? The Creator of all Creations, who created everything from nothing. The God who is incomparable to it’s Creations. He talks about how we are made from the lowest of all low, the sperm…which is of no value without love. Hence we shouldn’t be proud. Our life(physically) is only made possible by everything that is around us(the people). That’s for the physical body. But for the soul, the source of all souls is….Noor Muhammad. Which means, the light of Muhammad. It is the first Creation. God Created it from nothing. Before any other creations. Way before the physical body of the prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) was created... “A Light has come to you from Allah as a Clear Book.” (al-Maidah 5:15) http://www.islamandquran.org/fatwas/is-prophet-muhammad-a-noor-or-a-human-being.html But again, this need to be explained by those who knows better. Do not misinterpret it. Do not interpret it as something new. So, about our physical body, we shouldn’t be proud because humans are originally weak and poor. Helpless. That’s our origin. Our physical body, only came into existence with the love of a man and a woman. With the love of a mother who keeps nurturing her pregnancy and the father who works hard to support both. We are born weak. And helpless, not knowing anything , shit and all(but well, I’m a baby back then so it’s cute~) ok just kidding don’t be mad~~runnn! , and then they further fund all of our needs and educations. The point is, we as human being really have nothing to be proud of. To be arrogant with. For we all depends on one another. Actually it is everyone that we’ve ever come in contact with. Every single human being, is what make us who we are today. So don’t be arrogant. Without others you won’t be who you are today. without the prophet, I wouldn't know how to pray, without the gurus, we wouldn't know what's true and what's not, without all those authors and books that we've read, we wouldn't know nothing. Without actualized.org, I wouldn't have all these questions, which opens up more ways for me to get closer to Truth, which encourage me to meet up with gurus and find truth which I never really care to do before. And I've found high quality books like those of Imam al-Ghazali. We all depends on God. Without God we wouldn't be able to make any movement possible, as everything is in the control of God...But we are given choices.... It’s like a mind game. Everything is interconnected. If you go deep enough, you’ll find truth. It all will only lead you to one truth. Be sincere and God will guide you. Another important thing that he talks about is, this world is like an entrance. It’s only an entrance to a huge mansion. Or like a bathroom. Without the bathroom, a house will be full of shit. It is necessary, but not to be proud of. There is no place for arrogance so we should be humble if we wanna get closer to God. So this world(everything that we see: the earth and the entire universe) is only a preparation for the afterlife. The seven layers of the earth together with the seven layers of the universe(including all of the different dimensions), is like a ring in a desert~ compared to the afterlife. The real deal started after we died. Real death. Not the nondual death btw. If using the term "to die before you die" , I am talking about the latter, not the prior. That’s what I mean by Real death. A lot of what he says kinda reminds me of hellspeed. He did talk about not having to read all the books. But he gifted me with his book, it's not really much about knowledge but like a practice to purify ourselves. Physically and internally for the soul. To get closer to Allah*. Again, I wanna thanks everyone who sincerely answered all of my questions patiently. Sorry if I've ever be annoying or something.. Okay I hope everyone will find real Truth. Sincerely I wish the best for everyone... I had found the answer to my first question. What does the soul made up from... It is from Noor Muhammad. The Light of the Prophet Muhammad(May Allah be pleased with him)^^. To actually start practicing with a peaceful mind, heart and soul. I hope everyone do(find their answers). I think what matters is the intention. As long as you're sincere, you'll be fine. God will guide you *btw,be careful. My definition of Allah might be different than what you think of as I mentioned it~ It will be too long for me to explain so I wouldn't even start~

@Fairy Stop playing with magic. It can do no harm to anyone neither can it gives you any benefits without God's permission. Sorry I might seems like an extremist, but I'm not yet a pro in other scriptures. So I can only speak confidently from one perspective(when it comes to solution to magic). I think everything is clear now. Between Truth and Falsity. Duality? Haha

But the thing is, there is fake death and there is real death. Make sure that you know the difference. Don't be deceived. Change is good. But make sure that you change for the all worth it. and not the opposite of it. Make sure that you're experiencing real non duality. And not the fake non duality. It might seems similar. But actually the opposite. Thinking that you've found the real Light, when in fact you're in the deepest Darkness. Duality? haha.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wt_Usd_2F9Y Magic is nothing but a test to human being. It can do no harm to anyone without God's will. Indeed, it is only to test you really~ Don't fall for it. For it has no benefits or whatever(though it might appear so to you,don't be deceived). Neither can it harm you unless God allows it. "And they followed [instead] what the devils had recited during the reign of Solomon. It was not Solomon who disbelieved, but the devils disbelieved, teaching people magic and that which was revealed to the two angels at Babylon, Harut and Marut. But the two angels do not teach anyone unless they say, "We are a trial, so do not disbelieve [by practicing magic]." And [yet] they learn from them that by which they cause separation between a man and his wife. But they do not harm anyone through it except by permission of Allah . And the people learn what harms them and does not benefit them. But the Children of Israel certainly knew that whoever purchased the magic would not have in the Hereafter any share. And wretched is that for which they sold themselves, if they only knew". Quran 1:102 *Btw, This is only for those who didn't know what they are into. Not for those who know exactly what they are into and still choose to~

Why? Because this world is just temporary?.... Oh yeah! So I won't be a grandma forever~~

Create wonders while you're still young. Live life! Run! Skate & explore! Live the adventure while you're still able! Learn as much as possible while you're still young. (Because as you get older, your memory wouldn't be as good as when you're younger, it's harder to learn something new,comparatively) Appreciate those around you, especially when there are still many who are older than you. Because as you get older, the number of people whom you can look up to will be decreasing. And you will slowly.....become the elderly instead. Many of your loved ones will die and new generation will look up to you instead. Until finally...it will be only you who are the oldest. Now that I think about it, they must feel a bit lonely(the elderly). I might be wrong though.. But this is not valid though, it is still from the perspective of the 22y.o me~ It can still be limiting~ *my grandma always told me to do things that older people are not able to do physically...just sayin~ I will soon be in their shoes so I will appreciate those advice~ Lastly, always be grateful for the now❤ Be mindful of your responsibility in the now. Whatever stage you are in life.....

First, you need to have good judgement. It is not about sympathizing or judging the guy. But, when it comes to safety and defense, you do have the rights to defend yourself. And to protect those around you. It's self defense. Had nothing to do with judging/being a bad person for beating someone to defend yourself. If someone inflicted physical danger you, you do have to defend yourself. That's just about the right thing to do. Especially when it comes to your mother & younger sibling. And of course yourself. This only applies when you are in that situation. And no one to defend you. You don't have to hate him. But do beat him up if you get into that situation again. But be in moderation though.. I thought you have an older brother. But it's a younger brother~ So you're the older one. More reasons for you to take care of your mother and your younger bro. If anything, your younger brother suffers the most... "I can't do anything" That's your limiting belief. Really it's all up to you to be a good older brother. He couldn't even trust his older brother~ what have you done?.... The least you could do is to be a good example. It's time now. Show him that you are responsible. And that he can trust you. But you need to get yourself together. Stop with all those limiting beliefs, it wasn't your fault btw(your father had done that to you) but you gotta overcome those limiting beliefs. Only then you can be a responsible older brother&son. Who else can they look up to if not you?.... I think it's hard for each to change. But you be the change then. Be good to your mother and your brother. And to yourself first. Don't add up to what's already broken. Make this a turning point for your family. This is your chance to be a responsible son/brother. Show by example. You don't have to talk to him. Maybe later...with your mother too... You're acting cold btw, of course that's how he gonna perceive you?. Show him some love! I know you are matured enough by now to be responsible & you have a good vision. The only thing that's holding you back now is your limiting belief/self judgement. Only you can work on that & no one can convince you otherwise. I think you know your potentials better. Be good to your brother & your mom.....show them that they can trust you.... Maybe by getting yourself together. Wake up call for your father. And you too. Make it worth it. *sorry if you can't relate & if I got it wrong. It must be hard to see em injured...

Btw, my father is the spiritual one in the fam, so I have no problem respecting him. *in case if anyone misunderstood*

Actually I was moved when you said your relationship with your mother is better now. And that you paid attention to her more. Because in my religion, a son will be blessed if he take care of his mother till forever. His life will be made easy by God. A son's responsibility is to the mother(and to take care of his female family members). While a daughter's responsibility is to respect the father. Then when she's married, it will be the husband over the father. But still both, only slightly more. Anyway, I said this because I see this with my brother...His life was made easy when he's taking care of our mom(In terms of fortune& his works). And btw, why are you still in that house if your father is only belittling you? Leave the house for something(could be learning/work etc) and he will miss you haha. (Not running away haha but find something new that is away from home) I thought your mother was at home that's why I wouldn't recommend you to stay away from home even if it's toxic to you. I've noticed that you are afraid to step out of your father's limiting belief about you. Trust me that's your only obstacle for now. Try to see past through all those limitations/harsh words your father had been feeding you. Only then you'll be fine. Really. But still, be good to him. Just don't let him limit you haha. Never! Ok Goodluck~

@kieranperez So your mother aren't at home?

Hmm...I don't have much knowledge about China... @Jeff Zhang but be grateful for the good values anyway. There's a lot.

@Jeff Zhang China is a buddist country isn't it? I think there are many enlightened masters in China. But then again, it has the biggest population therefore are more diverse. From both sides, embrace your culture/values and respect other's values. Haha I give up?? *Aha, I am just curious about Uyghur. What are your thoughts about it as a normal citizen? Are they really chinese minorities? Or are they not originally from china? Btw, is this a distraction?.....?hmm.....not really. But is it?

Middle ground is key. Because we have extremely unenlightened dangerous people, and extremely enlightened people who are already liberated. To have peace & all being enlightened is ideal. But that's not how things are. Because there is the other extreme? How do we actually handle those extreme end if the gaps are too far apart? Maybe everything is already perfect~ who knows. What's most important is that we became 100% enlightened first. Not something in between. Or else it will be total chaos. In this "illusion" haha Btw, this does not only applies in enlightenment work, but also safety. If you come from the developed side, make sure that you are developed enough to know how to handle those on the other extreme end. Awareness is key. ❤ But not to the extreme either that you cannot enjoy the beauty of life...

I actually couldn't categorize people in terms of the spiral. Maybe on the surface level, but as I tried to go deeper, it is not possible. Everyone is different really...uniquely different. Even society at large....maybe it is just me who haven't understand the spiral. For example, do you categorize a sage who is very rich and successful, while being spiritually developed a stage orange? But this person had the values of green too. Or aborigin people who are open to new ideas but are less educated as blue? Is spiral dynamic a tool for measuring someone's values & fears or the level of open mindedness? What about respect? It can make a big difference no matter what colour in the spiral a person is. There are cultural aspects too. Any colour from the spiral can be rich in culture. I think I can understand the complexity of every groups/ individual as a whole, but couldn't put them into categorization. Idk~

*facepalm* why hadn't I watch this earlier~~ haha Now I can see the whole picture of this perspective?

I don't know with other scriptures, but arabic is the hardest language. I can only read but couldn't really understand the language. Translations are fine with me. Both english translation and my language, it is easily understood. Maybe it is just me though, because others can learn it fine~ I have read some part of the bible. NKJV & English standard version. Also in simple english. Don't get me wrong, I became interested because it was mentioned in the Quran. So I'm curious to know since God had mentioned about previous scriptures. Torah , Injil & Zabur. Apart from others too which is unknown.

True. Don't be a fool. Mind your safety wherever you're at. Know when to draw a line between being open minded and defending your safety/your values. But Leo, what is ISIS really? Did they genuinely believe what they're doing is right? Or is it intentional? ? Morocco is known for it's vibrance and beauty. Rich in culture. With beautiful people. I haven't been there, but it's on my wishlist. It has been fine all these while..... I went to a few middle eastern countries this year. I did went to a war conflict country, but we are guided by the locals. It's on the safe side. Stayed for a few weeks. It's a beautiful and profound experience. The locals are kind to us. And we visited ancient buildings that are more than 2000years old. But I don't know if it is still safe now. Beware of the war area though... Then we went to Dubai, on the surface it might seems like an orange country. But actually, the population consist of mostly immigrant who works there, not that many Dubai locals, the rest are tourist who went there for leisure and shopping.... Then we went to Oman. I think it is the best country i've ever went to.... Oman is the epitome of true balance......the manifestation of real Islam. And lastly, I lived in Egypt once in my early childhood. It was really fun and vibrant. But be smart. Especially if you're a tourist from the west. Egyptians are really fun to be with, but you gotta be smart. I miss Egypt.... Another thing I would like to remind, wherever you are(especially if it's a country that is foreign to you) make sure that you are accompanied by a man. In the middle east/india especially. It is part of the culture there, they respect you more. (some unethical guys might see u as vulnerable if you're alone). But don't get me wrong, most of the places that i've been to, it is safe.I do explore alone sometimes. But don't be totally mindless either. Btw, Asia is fine.....

@lmfao can u explain a lil bit more?

It's neither that either......because most people here had awakened to that consciousness......obviously they would speak in a different language than you......& you too... But then again....if you are conscious enough, nothing will traumatize you either. Nothing will scares you....

@SoonHei But no. Practically, in this world, God created the evils not to be loved. I'm not talking about the human individually per se. But their actions. The real devil? Btw, all human/babies are born pure. Like a blank canvas✨ Yo who spoiled the kids?! Hahahaha but isnt it inevitable to be in this illusion?

@Ampresus that question wouldn't arise if you've known what u gotta do Btw, make sure that your perspective is already broad enough if you decided to stop all the theory, or else u might missed something valuable. And i'm not just talking about the "theory" & "practice" but other aspect too. There's way too many things to explore when you're young. Dont limit yourself to just that. Have you found your niche/skills of mastery? 14 years old is not too young anymore hahaha jk?. It's not too late, you shoud find one if u haven't already. But then again, you're not me. So do whatever feels right to you~

@winterknight I've tried the self inquiry some time ago with non_nothing but it didn't work for me because I already know the answer. Haha or maybe because I am impatient. But ok. I will follow God's guidance and have faith

That only happens if you allows them to hold you back? It's all up to you~ Either way for you to choose~~

What i've noticed is that, it's not really much about moving up the spiral. Each stages have their own qualities and values. As long as we respect each other's values, even stage red person will be fine with you. & can get along with you fine. Really. I think it's about you accepting those around you for who they really are. We're all human afterall. You can't expect everyone to have your privilege(experience/education) or your perspectives. For example, there are aborigin people, who are happier than you. They might be uneducated, but are smarter than you(in a different sense). And have a bigger heart than you. Haha but unless you personally wanna move up the spiral, the only way to do that is by living with everyone from those spiral( however you wanna think about it haha). Jk, I mean, open your mind to as much perspectives/area of studies/countries/travelling/be a polyglot etc. Just to see & experience things from different perspectives. Haha I don't know tho. As Leo said, there are many independent factors. Don't limit yourself to the spiral either~ Don't limit anyone to spiral dynamic. The way I see it, everyone is unique, spiral dynamic is a useful tool on the bigger perspective, but not on individual level. If I try to categorize people individually (or even myself) , i'd go crazy~ so I won't even start doing that~ just don't~ I am not sure with isis tho, and those who have lost touch with their innate nature.... But God created everything for a reason