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Everything posted by Surfingthewave

  1. @Preety_India Best way to beat the trolls? Have the Self confidence to not give a ****. Even better way? Be Enlightened enough to know there's not a self.
  2. @TheSomeBody Don't blindly follow. He's giving you a no bs approach. See the work for what it is, forget the teacher. You've raised an important point about hero/non hero worship. Consciousness, beauty, love, realness is the work. Has nothing to do with how it is delivered. Forget the style and look at the substance. Here's a tip. He doesn't know any more than you, you just haven't seen it yet. What has been provided is a modern way of reaching people. A way of pointing (and screaming) at the path. Follow it. Or don't.
  3. @Carl-Richard Great post, thank you. Meditation is therapy indeed but you need the balls to sit on the cushion everyday. I wonder if meditation brought about this insight? ?
  4. @tatsumaru Thanks for sharing your story so far, what a journey you've been on. Go read peoples journals to check out more amazing stories of transformations. There are some real gems there. My story: Suffering 13 years of deep self development work (on/off ramped up in the last five) including meditation Non suffering/bliss states/mystical experiences/ Your story is a good example of going meta, but perhaps too soon? You mentioned still struggling with self esteem issues and health issues. I think what often happens is people perhaps get obsessed with becoming god/awakening /the big E before dealing with the basic self help stuff first. Sometimes working on the latter is enough. Don't blindly follow, question, observe, see and like you have been doing, use multiple sources. Remember there isn't a quick fix. It's a lifetime of work and I'm concerned many seekers perhaps are viewing it differently
  5. @tatsumaru I wonder if he meant don't spend your life on the cushion. The Tao Te Ching written by Lao Tzu is more a code to life, a set of important principles that can help you realise life is not about the seeking. Meditation can become part of the seeking especially by Westerners as it has been modified by its teachers over thousands of years. Like the Tao, there is no non-meditation without meditation. You have to use meditation to get to the non-meditation you describe (Nirvana). Some people can get there directly.
  6. @Roy I didn't believe the mind. The Never Ending Story. I began to realise there was something else, mind blowingly simple. To get there you have to wade through all the trauma. You may loose a horse in the process, fight the Nothing, meet some wizards, fall off a giant turtle and most importantly become the Story. If you can ride on the back a dragon while getting there then so be it.
  7. Sinking into Silence Why are we so afraid of silence? Listening, sitting, watching, waiting. Simplicity, patience and compassion are the three greatest treasures taught by Lao Tzu. How can we bring more of this into our lives. I struggle with patience and simplicity. Lao Tzu also states: Simple in thoughts and being - you return to source. Patience with others - you are in accord with the way things are. Patience = sitting and allowing. Allowing the what is. My other key treasure is to Sink into Silence. Live from here and there is no seeking needed.
  8. @Raptorsin7 Thank you. Yes there absolutely needs to be a balance. When I started combining Yoga practices / walking/ changing diet combined with the meditation practices that's when I started seeing real results. Retreats really are the best thing for this, but tricky right now. I agree about moving towards/saying yes to experience. It can take up so much energy moving away from pain. So stop the seeking. The secret is: meditation is reality, rather than just a state we get in to relax. Where we are in our minds when we are in meditation practices (or yoga etc) we are at one with experience. I've been experimenting with meditation in real time, off the cushion, in work, talking, listening, eating, etc. You do this more and more and bingo, you're living life right there. It's not just mindfulness it's letting go of the self's projection onto reality. Like the Tao Te Ching says - Don't live life, let life live you. Stop interfering and watch it all unfold.
  9. @SamC I am not a trauma expert or a professional but it sounds like you are trapped in a cycle here. You have made a powerful step by recognising this pattern. Trauma can become part of how we identify, for myself I've worked on accepting this and letting this go which has helped me move forward. How do you accept your feminine side? Fully, with self love. Culturally and historically, this has been difficult for men, but now however this is seen as more attractive and imo the key to having more authentic relationships. I see gender as more fluid, it's not fixed, and having trans and non binary friends and being part of the LGBTQ+ community has really helped with this. In a relationship sense, you are aware of how this is impacting which is huge progress. Be kind to yourself and consider more work around self love.
  10. So it's not really about your views about feminism and more to do with unconscious/shadow work you are doing? Also the thing you "can't stand" is a movement of reforms for the equality of women dating hundreds of years. Women have died in the name of feminism. Be aware that the anima you describe is a psychological construct. It's good you're making steps to heal/get in touch with the feminine within you but be careful of projecting your trauma onto others /oppressed groups and labelling it as something else. I've done it myself. Just an observation.
  11. @SamC I have experienced sexism and discrimination in the workplace, I have experienced feelings of being unsafe when walking down the street and I have also experienced discrimination because I date women (that's more homophobia however). Based on the many replies you have been given on this thread how will you be reframing your position on feminism?
  12. @SamC You resonate with JP because perhaps like JP you are a priveledged male who has never experienced sexism. Do you know what it feels like to not be allowed access to a library because you are a woman? Do you know what what it feels like to not be allowed to vote because you are a woman? Do you know what it feels like to not be promoted in a job because you are a woman? Do you know what it feels like to not be able to open a bank account because you are a woman? Do you know what it feels like to be paid less than a man for the same job because you are a woman? Do you know what it feels like to be expected to give up your career because you have a child? Do you know what it feels like to not feel safe walking down the street because you are a woman? You don't because you are a man. Perhaps you should study a class on where feminism has come from, the history of oppression for women and you may have a different perspective.
  13. @Raptorsin7 Hey, good to hear from you. I have more experiences of this space, of presence, these days as I described above. I also continue to have experiences of intense "monkey mind". It's like the Yin - Yang symbol of the Tao - you can't have one without the other. It's less about trying to resolve anything and more about keeping up with the practice, as you say diligently. Keep doing it, daily if possible, and the work will guide you. Most of my insights occur during meditations/after yoga/in silence. They can also randomly. Insights occur more often, are often deeper as is detachment to experience. Or being with presence. Other thing I would add is something that helped me recently is realising the deep body/mind unity. Meditation is important but so is movement in the body, and what we put into the body. When I eat/drink rubbish my monkey mind is let loose. How are you examining this in your life. It sounds like you are making good progress. Good luck.
  14. The Consciousness Gap Ever noticed the more conscious you get the more you are aware of the unconsciousness of others. Got into a bit of deep water recently with this. Challenging others can be tricky but if it comes from a place of awareness/love then it is important. The ego fall out is interesting. Mainly from others ego but could also be your own. If you can see this for what it is, other's ego/ lack of consciousness at play/your own difficulties , it can help with the process. If you also do the following: What buttons were pressed for you during the exchange? Did you really listen to the others point of view? What else might you be dealing with? Is it coming from a place of love? (I also use other resources here such as letting go technique Michael Singer or The Work Byron Katie or Brene Brown's work vulnerability /shame). The mind can play a game of cat and mouse here. See the game for what it is. Another distraction from the path of consciousness and a "I'm better than you" egoic state. Remember Oneness. The main technique here is surrendering and let events play out. But do apologise if you need to, forgive yourself and if you can, forgive the person.
  15. The Secret Do we need any more books, classes, pod casts, self development gurus? We think we do. The mind creates drama to be solved. All we need to do is remember we are not our thoughts. Move into pain, see it as energy. Allow the energy to pass through. I allowed the emotions to pass through. Like friendly reminders of what life is really and truly about. The addiction of the mind is it's function. Without thinking, it cannot survive. Today during my short 10 minute meditation I was able to access the higher self, the one that knows. The one that knows that we are not our thoughts. That was all it took. After years of practice it took me the same amount of time as making a sandwich. That's the Secret. Right now, you have access to it. This can only be accessed through experience. I describe a higher self conceptually, experientially it is like sinking to the bottom of a deep blue ocean. The ocean underneath the tidal wave of Thought. To take it a step further, the one that knows, is also the one. The (energy) source. I've been caught up recently in the mind. Trying to swim amongst the waves. Come back to source as there are great times ahead.
  16. 3 pals are back: anger fear and sadness Triple whammy this week. Huge emotional upheaval but that is what is. Yoga Nidra session = heart opening and self love Beautiful session, deep relaxation. Message this week = sometimes things are just a bit rubbish. But things change so quickly, everything is impermanent.
  17. Moving towards joy When you begin to move towards light, darkness can be there to remind you of the opposite, the duality. I've struggled at times to walk into joy, abundance, and complete acceptance. I had an insight of why this must be. Although there is a part if it which is about the personal, and about the path of surrendering to the "what is" rather than "what was/will be" it is also about unravelling conditioning we may have put on ourselves. Being hurt by key people in my life at happy times in my life (childhood, university, coming of age, formative years) is part of that conditioning. As an artist I can often get blocked by past patterns which can impact how I move towards flow, joy and light but most importantly how I express my creativity. It can also affect how I receive energy, self worthiness, abundance and life's gifts. I realise I am here to experience this energy/ vibration and have a lot to be grateful for. It's time to let go of those past patterns. They are just part of the rich tapestry of (my) life. When you move into a lighter way of being, the darkness is just a reminder of your progress and how far you've travelled. Don't be fearful of this, welcome it. Contemplate what could be stopping you from receiving life's gifts.
  18. @mandyjw Thanks for reading.. Great YT channel btw, keep doing what you're doing ?
  19. There are no "moments" Insights from my meditation practice today have focused on time. I got a sense of how eternal awareness is. Awareness without perception, with no limitations of the mind. Experiencing. There is no "moment by moment" there is simply this. The mind likes to impose limitations on the unlimited. If we could see the true unlimited nature and beauty of what we're experiencing, then there would be no reason to seek at all. Today on my walk I realised I am enough. I do things because I enjoy them, with an idea of a goal perhaps, a purpose, but this doesn't limit me. I was chasing a goal for the wrong reasons. We all get caught in the trap of wanting to achieve things. When it is enough to just be alive, experiencing. Rupert Spira wrote that Time is thought superimposed upon eternity and eternity is another name for our true nature of awareness. Today remember that rather than just a moment, you're eternity.
  20. Women don't perceive that as how you think. Perhaps unravel where you are getting your perceptions of women from? Stereotypes are outdated. James Bond included. It was a very successful film franchise written in a very out dated time. Don't base your perceptions of women's preferences on that. Lots of women want authenticity and connection. Forget game, forget movie stars. I look forward to a female being cast as James Bond, a Jane Bond who can shatter some of these perceptions.
  21. I hope you feel proud, you should. I'm sorry you feel hurt. It's not an alternative lifestyle, it's your life. Well done to you. The whole Christian/religion/gay thing is frustrating. The shame is on them, we live in 2021 and it's time for people to update their attitudes and beliefs. My partner received homophobia at work from a colleague who is religious so I feel your pain. It's their insecurity and it's sad but I wouldn't let it change what you're doing in your life.
  22. @Ander Tomsen Sorry to hear you live somewhere so many people are homophobic. It also sounds like you are having to keep who you are a secret. My advice to you is where you can, be brave. When people start talking in that way, casually drop in the conversation you are gay. Homophobia is based on fear of difference. Exposure is key to breaking down this fear. If you live your truth you will be not only helping others to realise it's okay to be gay, you will be aligning yourself with love and will get that in return. If someone has a problem with you being gay that's their problem and not yours. Try not to let their toxic opinions effect you. If you have to drop friends or colleagues over it, then do. So many gay people have fought and died for the right to live a life of loving who they want to love and being who they really are. Keep up the fight with three words, actually I'm gay. Truth = power and love.
  23. You will. Keep meditating. But stop trying. Stop having a goal. There is no goal in meditation. It's just allowing what is. Also do something else, a completely different practice you enjoy to get through blockages (I do Yoga Nidra). Could be exercise, singing, drawing etc. What do you do when you put a heavy backpack down? Just put it down. Stop the efforting. It took me a long time but actually it can also happen in an instant.
  24. @Max_V Because we live in a world where being different is feared rather than celebrated. Don't feed into this fear. Talk about your experiences. What we need is awareness. Your 21 years of experience is valuable, how will it help you going forward? How can it help others? You know the way. Your backlash is actually pushing you forward you just aren't aware of it yet. What I've realised is a backslash is an important kick towards our true purpose. But you've got to really want it.