now is forever

@Viking there is no exploration without an explorer. truth is what remains when you explore until it is shaken to be not true anymore. if you experienced both under exploration you at least know what is your truth.

@Viking you never know anything until you know, and even then you might not know - but you know at least more or less than before “i don’t know” is just a comfort zone.

yet

mhhh - basically i think it’s not a conspiracy, it’s just that artists learn to think in pictures. during education in product design (in sens of industrial design) we used to say you can’t reinvent the wheel, we used that to get less fixated on doing something really new, because then we could let go a little bit. if you try to take the perspective of the artist, you maybe can understand, that they need some kind of foundation - they need it more, if they are talking of something that does not exist - how can you show something that does not exist physically? the meaning of the underlying story has to be translated somehow - and it also should be perceived by the audience. they also work in different teams on the movie - so costumes may play a big role etc. they think about how to translate the story. you have different directors and people who all work together to make that happen. that brings about the depth of picture alignment. but it doesn’t make the movie automatically a good one. a lot of movies are flatliners even though they have deep pictures. why because they don’t get the essence of what they are talking about out there. or the story was already not it. it’s open for interpretation. so it’s certainly about the glases you are wearing, to understand them in a certain way - leo’s video about recontextualisation is supposedly about that, too. and don’t forget how difficult it is to throw a movie out there. you already mostly only see the ones that had potential initially. the ones that are worth spending money, to earn some more money. but sometimes you don’t get to see the really good ones. because no one wants to make them - it’s like baking bread - you can bake a bread that’s really healthy but fear not to sell enough or you can let it look healthy but the colour is made with sugar couleur. in that sense, you can always learn something from a bad movie, too. may that be visually or content poor if you set that into some kind of context. then of course, you are the director of the movie you are watching. kopf kino - head cinema. so it’s about how aware you are about the underlying content and the content of reality, if you get it right and at the same time about how aware you are about the pictures, to get hidden meanings right. might look like a pretty bad movie but on the second schell it is not and one level deeper it’s still hollow ? (something else than empty) - i usually ask for the intention to make it, to begin with, to decide if it’s hollow or not. there we are already at the question about nihilism... i thought that through some day. what i kept was the last part of the thought, too: a no to a no is still a yes. a yes to a yes is also a yes. but in some cases a yes to a no can also be felt as a no but said as a yes. so in the end it is a matter of how aligned one is to his/her own yes’s and no’s. but nihilism as a philosophy and way of interacting turns to the yes at one point. while negativism may keep the no to the point of selfdestruction. so it’s very important to separate negativity from the nihilism. as well as the false yes from the positivism. - think i’m still learning to do that, saying no more often. so a yes to a yes is only a yes if the yes seems to be very important. maybe because it is a no to a no.

@tsuki how did you like it? went to a lake side - mostly i liked the plasticity of the moon when the shadow was moving on. also liked the plasticity of the space during the eclipse - the stars made it look 3d. has been a long time since i’ve watched the night sky in a remote place with that kind of attention. all in all something too be repeated without eclipse maybe during new moon. might also go to a observatory to watch mars. you were right, choosing a topic of interest randomly is very tempting, too.

mh - difficult - now i also need a translation to what you are saying. i’m talking in symbols. and talking about how holism reappears in a lot of cultures - especially in religions. all these cultures are producers of art. in the art you can find symbols these symbols stand for something - if you try to align them with medicine politics etc you get some kind of code. and this code is a step closer to infinite intelligence. because you just have to follow the code. to understand the hidden meaning of unwritten knowledge. if you’ve found it you can embody it into every space or system. and then experiment upon that. but you are good in nihilism- so that’s your strength. so you are already good in saying no - why should you say yes, you are already saying yes to no. disconstruction is your power, it’s good without changing something about it! it‘s still good to understand the symbols. sorry i can‘t explain it better! it‘s about the meaning of the body parts what they do etc. what is a body when you talk about the ego, if systems are ego‘s etc. the ego sits inside another ego inside another ego - like a matrioshka. the space in the middle is yourself. the house represents the shells ? it‘s a spiral, isn‘t it.

@tsuki it‘s a matter of construction and a matter of returning to the center fast enough. i recommend wheel throwing class for yogic experience in flexibility. ? we all carry our house on our shoulders it’s a matter of learning to fit us into the house and the house to fit us, when we are gone all that remains is an empty shell. it’s nice to know, with growing, we already grow into a bigger house. here and where we really are.

bauhaus philosophy of education, basically you wander through all phenomena, experiencing it, in the end you meet at the experimentation space together to create. that‘s bauhaus networking. if you finally understand the emptyness off a cup - you understand zen.

found this yesterday the darker ones are related to the outside material world - the light gray to the inner spiritual work. i hope i don’t reveal too many secrets here... please delete if that‘s the case. 1.how to find love 2. how to keep love alive 3. sticking with it or going 4. how to develop potential in creating something (here it‘s related to career) 5. how to develop self-confidence 6. how to fail 7. how to develop selfawareness 8. how to interact/deal with others 9. how to be serene/composed 10. how culture can change your life 11. how to enjoy life 12. the meaning of life

if you let a materialistic worldview in sense of political philosophy with an utopian outcome run it’s tracks through the symbolism of religious systems in a childlike open mind, it will cut a track into existential survival, understanding where humanity has always wanted to go, leaving the controversials behind. it’s a matter of possibilities to act uppon them or the wanting to act uppon them that makes you one with everyone else. if you then reflect on the symbols and decide witch one are fake and witch one overlap in meaning you‘ll get a clear hint to the survival outcome of humanity on this planet. the path maybe smeared but the vision is not. survival is the ability to find something positive in life and something to cling to.

but the money makes the opportunity and the trade, and the quality and the drugwar as well as the non legalization. it’s multiple factors.

if we skip the responsibility part - i‘m certainly a long bleader.

wrote this oneliner with 16 - looking back i think i was smart back then: „träumst du deinen traum denn nich, wie jeder hier auf erden?“ don‘t you dream your dream, as everyone on earth?

@Crystalous most psychedelics influence emotions more than the thinking. over the time they remodulate your emotional system. a lot of psychedelics influence the serotonin and dopamine process - they mimic emotions. the body thinks: overload and stops producing them for a while. or starts destroying the ones that are already there.depends on the substance. for longterm users, it’s more difficult - sometimes they need substitutes, because the body get‘s used to underproduction . that’s the short version. the body doesn’t really produce negative emotions... it‘s in that sense the absence of emotion. or remodulation of emotion with some emotion missing. so the system counterreacts, that’s also why counterreacting from outside with psychiatrical drugs again is controversial - because you start manipulating the system again. that’s why adaptogens are an alternative, they overall balance the system more holistically.

yeah that’s a huge system, too. state supported... doctors as dealers. in germany we have a lot of alternative practitioners though. but a lot of them fall of the insurance system. it’s slowly changing. but still some money needed for the individual at the moment and some consciousness, too. and antibiotics safe life sometimes, at least that those kind of drugs are also standardized and come with an explanation on how to use them. i know psychiatrical drugs over the counter in the us it‘s more of a problem... huge topic!

@Leo Gura you almost sound like a dealer here what about the money made with drugs? that‘s a huge topic. i know all the explanations about legalization and how that would help etc. but the so called hard drugs will still supposedly stay illegal even if they ever change the system. would be interesting to talk about conscious dealing and a conscious mafia... i suppose that’s difficult. some parts will always stay criminal. well, money... from flat to round.

hahaha - i also have to tame a dragon? flower growing is something else ?

hope the song is not too sad, it doesn’t really fit. maybe this one: @Zweisteini‘m really bad in saying goodbyes

actually i wanted to stop this here for some time - there is a lot going on in reality for me during the next months. i’ll move, deeper into the chaos and life purpose is calling. so i really need to focus. it‘s just that it was difficult to stop, because my mind wouldn‘t let me. so i tried to bring the heart to some kind of rest we are always stronger together, but dreams have a self agenda too. unfortunately we have just two hands, i always wanted to have a third one... maybe one day. but we‘ll work in parallel‘s on the social sculpture. if beuys or the bauhaus, it doesn‘t matter.

@Zweistein what do you think i‘m talking about? my heart always wanted to be one. in sense of size relative to the sun i might be just a neutrino

the song of the butterfly

...

berlin calling

i‘m thankful for this empty space here, where i could squeeze a part of myself in - i would never have told it to just myself. the feeling of talking to this space or to everyone who wants to read gave me the opportunity. i would never have written here if i hadn’t had an existential crisis and an autoimmune disease. i also wouldn’t have written without having a near death experience in my youth experiencing nothingness shortly after - without shaving my hair at the age of 15. i wouldn’t have written if i hadn’t had all this symbols and pictures appearing all the time during writing and not without the mini experiments with challenging chaos i had in the chaotic parts of berlin. i even have a small dimple on my forehead, where i ran into a tube at the age of 5 hahaha, so many coincidences. wouldn’t have written if there wasn’t something greater than me. i now feel part of. thank you for that, all of you, blanc papers

and some problems solve themselves