Deziree

First is awareness of your problem and then letting go.

You're way too attached to who you are as a person so it's causing a lot of friction in the inherent ego. Let it go. Let people say what they want to because people will do it anyway. Become immune to it, be more focused on what you want in the moment and then whatever they say will be a piss in the wind.

Different psychological aspects discussed on this channel.

It seems like you want to escape this human form but is this what you genuinely want or just a coping front?

(self referential notes) Dear OceanicBlizzard - OceanicWorm/BlizzardWorm. Breathe in, the Knight has come in his warrior clothing. Let yourself relax into it. You are an important part of everything. Waves are traveling across vast lengths of ocean,rising and falling right now. Just as your circadian rhythms tick on, the tides are responding to the moon. The trees nearby are taking in the carbon dioxide you exhale. They send back the very oxygen that circulates through your bloodstream, allowing your muscles to relax in this very moment. You live in an interconnected world, as your own story revolves here in a Fabulous way, do not be surprised if it becomes easier to have patience for those around you. You are learning to have patience towards yourself. The simple act of breaking habits into tiny pieces and committing to just the first, is an act of patience. You are creating space and time for your own ups and downs, free of judgement. The Serbian poet Dejan Stojanovic takes perspective taking into poetic levels. As you breathe in again, imagine yourself, embodied in every one of these lines : To be a lantern in the darkness; Or an umbrella in a stormy day; To feel much more than know. To be the eyes of an eagle, slope of a mountain. To be a wave, understanding the influence of the moon. To be a tree and read the memory of the leaves. To be an insignificant pedestrian on the streets. Of crazy cities, watching, watching and watching. To be a smile on the face of a child. And shine in their memory. As a moment, saved without planning. Know that, someday, your own memories will be made of unplanned moments. You are planning your habits, true, but you can remain alive to the experience. The way water feels as you drink, the tree you never noticed on your walk. Let each moment be vivid so that, when you look back on the tapestry of your life, each is still beautiful to you. Tomorrow may contain a moment that will shine on into your future and, someday, bring a smile to your face as you look back.

I liked this. And I'm going to follow this. Consider that when it "hurts", is not about the other person but what your thoughts are telling you about yourself in that moment. Basically your mind is playing a trick with you, is saying the problem is outside when actually is inside. You can´t let your mind tell who you are. Because it will always tell you who you are based on your experiences, past and karma. Because that´s what the mind runs on: information about the identity it has constructed. It can´t reveal who you are. So if you use your mind to tell who you are it will always tell you the same story. You need to stop letting the mind telling you who you are.

Self-honesty is the path mate. Just be aware of your emotions and thoughts. Avoid comparing yourself to others. Everyone had their own unique path. You have yours too. You are suffering from deep insecurities and that's pushing you to growth but that's negative motivation. You are operating from a paradigm of fear rather than motivation and enthusiasm. You want to succeed at the things you do because you like doing them and not because you want to be better than everyone or to put someone down. Extend an empathetic glance to people who are doing better than you, think that they deserve and even if they don't, think of them as fortunate instead of thinking that you're inadequate. What's happening is that you are largely centering your ambition around Ego and egoic fulfillment. Instead take the route of compassion. Both fortunate and unfortunate people deserve compassion. You don't have to be jealous of them. Think of yourself as deserving of whatever you don't have and thankful of what you already have. Then focus on what you gotta do to filter out distraction and pointed focus on what you want without any ulterior motive. Without any insecurities. Without too much illusion or attachment. Radical self acceptance might also help you. You haven't yet embraced the unhelpful parts of yourself. Integrate that. Tell yourself that you love yourself as you are and who are. Begin with this emotion of acceptance. Then your jealousy might fade away a bit. And always know that what we do is not just to feed the ego endlessly but to find awareness, hope, help and gradual improvement. Other responses were good too. Excellent!

It also depends on the instruments used.

In late May I started getting these unique experiences. It started with a walking mindfulness meditation, where 20-30 minutes in I started to really feel everything around me, the hardness of the concrete, the heat of the sun, the noise of the passing trucks. It all became overwhelming. I had to take a break from it all and ended up in a park. Deeper meditation made the colors vivid, and I could feel the plants, hear the bugs, people walking by were moving in slow motion. The weird thing is that it felt like it had been 15 minutes, but an alarm in my phone indicated it had been almost 3 hours. Although it is inaccurate the only experience that is similar was the weed I had before But it wasnt quite like that either.

Eat at your friend's place. A retreat might help. Be hardcore on changing your diet and hit the gym.

During meditation, a powerful insight struck me: Motivation is like thirst, needing constant replenishment. This led me to consider how I seek inspiration, often consuming motivational content that builds up an intense internal energy—like a volcano about to erupt. However, I realized I lack a clear purpose to channel this energy, only vague desires to 'be better.' This is dangerous: repeatedly getting excited about my potential without a true goal, then falling into despair because I fail to apply that motivation constructively, becomes detrimental to self-improvement.

Thanks!

Make a high consciousness group on Facebook or something like that or start your own community group and hire an app designer. This is something Sam Harris did with his app.

Some of my musings As you settle in for rest, breathe in deeply. You have become a good friend to yourself here on your fabulous path. Let your muscles relax as you exhale. Breathe in again and feel your shoulders drop. Let your arms become heavy. Listen to a poem by Jane Hirshfield and realize your extraordinary power to heal. There are names for what binds us: Strong forces. Weak forces. Look around, you can see them. The skin that forms in a half empty cup Nails rusting into the places they join, Joints dovetailed on their own weight. The way things stay so solidly Wherever they have been set down — And gravity, scientists say, is weak. And see how the flesh grows back Across a wound, with a great vehemence. More strong, Than the simple untested surface before. There's a name for it on horses, When it comes back darker and raised: proud flesh, As all flesh, Is proud of it's wounds, wears them. As honors given out after battle, Small triumphs pinned to the chest - And when two people have loved each other, See how it is like a scar between their bodies, Stronger, darker and proud : How the black cord makes them a single fabric That nothing can teal or mend.

You can mentally pleasure yourself endlessly, a true cerebral acrobatics, and the only reason you can is because it's utterly meaningless. A vacuum, a null-set of purpose. But building a life from actual suffering – now that's got some heft, some real conceptual density. Imagine you're just a big, empty space, a pure void. Nothing, absolutely zero, could make you happy. To suffer is to actively make that void even worse, a deliberate descent into something more, something less blank.

What's the key difference between pseudoscience and esoteric science please?

I agree there's not much merit to it. Bogus slogan invented to attract Trump brigade.

They are Tier 1 people and you can't change them. You have to let them be. You also have to engage with them at their level to get along with them or to thrive among them. Their survival agenda is too constricted and non-inclusive.

Your definition of sanity was near perfect. You seem to operate on a logical paradigm. My question is, why is it hard for you to know what insanity is?

Isn't it easy to differentiate (based on your definition), between who is and who isn't? I mean it's easy to conclude that someone is insane if their interpretation is totally incoherent with human logic, isn't it so? Why would need anyone to tell you what's insanity and what's not?

Brain is a muscle and it's how you exercise this muscle. Type A personalities exercise it way too much. That's how they get things done besides raw genetics. Then it becomes a habit once they are in a feedback loop.

This can mean that our feelings towards ourselves influence how we see our reflection, potentially creating a "vicious cycle" if self-feelings are negative. You have to try mirror gazing but without any preconceived notions. It's like the mirror is not lying but perhaps you want the mirror to lie because it's too difficult to confront the truth

How would you define sanity yourself?

You don't need to think God. You have to be God.