Onecirrus

I’m curious what percent of men are actually “winning” in this dating game. All of my married friends are miserable and tell me it was the biggest mistake of their lives and they feel like they can’t get out, my other friends spend all their time playing Magic: the gathering and vidya and seem to have completely given up on dating entirely, and I have one friend who fucks lots of girls and commits to none of them. Out of like 8 men I know, the last one is the only remotely successful one. We’re all under 30 btw. What percent of men do you think is actually getting the results they want in this dating market?

@Princess Arabia Do you really think most men are romantically satisfied? What about all the incel manosphere shit? What about the divorce rate? What about 66% of men under 30 being single? What about the rising rates of virginity? I don’t think it’s just my relative perspective. Me and people around me aren’t racist, but most of the world is still virulently racist.

@Princess Arabia You said single men were rare, I was just saying otherwise.

@Emerald I think you are like the third person to make this personally about me, but I’ll answer your question. I want someone who is emotional invested in my survival and well-being. Do I believe I can get that? Not really. I am curious about the macro dynamics of dating though, since none of my friends excluding one is happy with their results in romance. If this was an economic discussion, no one would be trying to pry into my psyche, it’s kinda annoying.

@Princess Arabia In the original post, I specified what percent of men get the results they want from dating. Generally, men either want sexual abundance or a fulfilling relationship. Possessing either of these seems very rare for men. As for rarely meeting a single man, something like 66% of men under 30 are single.

@Princess Arabia I think if you polled American men, most would say they are unhappy with their results, even the married men.

@RendHeaven We’ll never have an accurate estimation, but certainly most are miserably unfulfilled. I find it puzzling why this isn’t discussed and any attempt to discuss it is dismissed as incel ideology or something.

@Princess Arabia The most promiscuous men seem to also be the least responsible and mature so makes sense

@Princess Arabia Okay, so it’s a hygiene thing, I understand. I thought it was some kind of reverse slut shaming

@Princess Arabia I consider him a success because he gets the results he actually wants, can’t say the same for those other men I know. I also don’t understand how promiscuous men disgust you but a working girl doesn’t, why the double standard?

@NoSelfSelf Not positive results, cheated on, etc. But even my married friends have talked to me about this.

@NoSelfSelf This place is worse than Reddit sometimes

@gettoefl I’m curious about the entire population, my personal dating successes are unremarkable and unrelated.

I think one of the most profound discoveries of my life is that human interaction does not really produce happiness. It can be a nice experience, but it’s ultimately an impermanent fleeting experience, and it doesn’t really fundamentally make me feel any better than if I didn’t have it. In fact, just being alone in my own awareness is far more satisfying than having to play human. All human conversation is also usually about past, future, problems, and pop culture, it really drags me into concepts, thinking, meaning making, and judgment, which all really produces quite a bit of unhappiness and obscure being. Playing human just ultimately feels like a chore, I was just wondering if anyone else could relate?

@Leo Gura I remember your Life Style minimalism episode and Things you don’t know you want episode. Holy shit, it’s hard to believe I wanted a material life once. No life actual feels like pure life.

And why do these posts get attention but not mine?

I’ve never had sex, why should it feel different from never going on a rollercoaster or something?

I’m curious what the most common traps are in relationships. I’ve never been in one before, and maybe I never will, but I’m still curious. Also, do you think never getting into a relationship is a trap? It wasn’t my intention, but that’s how things turned out.

Survival is exhausting. I feel like having another pair of hands to share day to day tasks with is a much better survival strategy. Marriage and relationships were seen in a much more utilitarian sense in the past, but can’t you still hold that perspective today? Imagine if someone wanted to be in a relationship with you. You like them and enjoy they’re company, but you’re not over the moon about them or anything. Would it be wrong to get into a relationship with this person primarily to make life a little easier? I’m not saying to just take advantage of them and offer no value in return. Both parties aid the other’s survival, but one party isn’t necessarily in love. Is that wrong?

Femininity seems to be an amalgamation of certain dispositions, attitudes, and behaviors both men and women can exhibit, but why does femininity even exist? And why am I attracted to it? I also have quite a bit of contempt toward it’s approach to life, often finding it foolish and immature, yet I still find it enthralling.

For example, the way women add a decorative touch to a dead space, or how they’re more intuitive, or how they give up control and flow with life. This is femininity, and it’s attractive. But I don’t know why.

@MarkKol I clarified it was the behaviors, dispositions, and attitudes that are attractive. That is femininity. A vagina and boobs in a vacuum is not femininity, although they are still attractive. But why are the behaviors, dispositions, and attitudes attractive?

I was in complete denial I was bi until I did LSD for the first time. I’ve also theorized maybe all humans are bi, but social conditioning makes it unconscious. I don’t know if that’s true or not.

@Princess Arabia I asked a woman what she would do if she won the lottery. She said she’d never wear the same outfit twice ever again. It was the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard, but it was also really cute and enticing and now I like her more.

@Javfly33 I’m bi btw.