Olaf

@Valach if it is a technique you can fake it, but you can't fake true abundance, which is the willingness to let go. To be truely abundant is love, spiritual.

@Valach this is not a game, this is abundance, don't get me wrong I am not doing this as a technique.

@LordFall Yes respect is important and therefor also respecting her space, I wasn't playing games I am genuine when I want to give her space. I have to look into those memes lol.

Okay so I want to talk a little bit about youtube. First of all I will give my secrets away, for me the best way to grow is to use someone famous in a niche and have some drama about them or involve them in a subject. This is working well to get maybe 1k to 4k views. Especially when I edit it well and work on the thumbnail etc. Now what has helped you to grow on youtube? and what are some things that helped you to get more reach? I am curious to hear. Even if you are in a different niche then me, I think I can still learn from you and also the other people on this forum.

Okay this is exactly what was happening, holy shit he describes it so well. You get tense, because you are trying harder, that is also what I felt at the end of that bad day. Like my muscles were more tight. This is starting to make sense, his advice says: become 10% less tense, act like you're stoned lol or become aware of the tension, but just don't use it, like with singing. I have had singing lessons so I exactly know what he means when he talks about the tension when you are trying to force a note. I think Owen calls it tension versus release muscles.

I have had this happen before. I don't know why, or I kind of do, but I'm not 100% sure exactly what my problem is. Today I approached some girls, and I can say that I wasn't in a good mood. I don't know why. I just wasn't feeling it, and I was also kind of doing it like it was a task I had to complete because I had committed myself to it. It's like going to the gym, you make yourself go because you want to stay consistent. That was one thing. Also, once again, I didn't have too much time, so even though I tried not to rush, I still felt in the back of my mind that I shouldn't take too much time in between approaches. So somehow I was still rushing, even though I tried my hardest not to. Every set went wrong, and this is why energy is so important. One day you're super confident because you're feeling good, sets open easily, and people are very receptive. Other days you're just not feeling it, or you're rushing, or whatever the reason may be, and you're not able to do it by any means. I think these might just be the ups and downs of the process, and slowly it will become more stable. But for now, it was kind of annoying, and I went home earlier than I wanted to. Looking back, I'm not feeling too bad about it. I still went out despite not feeling that good, but I'm trying to understand how I can have fewer of these days where I'm not in flow. Warming up is important, and not being in a rush is important, but I feel like there's something more underneath the surface that I'm doing on these off days that makes it much harder for myself than it really needs to be. Anyway, I'll keep digging and trying to understand what happens on these days because I know it wasn't the girls, it was me, my energy.

@Lyubov thank you for explaining, I think yeah that quality is valuable although what is quality right? Like something attention grabbing can still not be interesting as something that people seem to be interested in, but the video isn't super well edited, they still seem to watch. Example would be for example news about politics. People seem to be interested in it and they watch it even if it isn't that well edited. Also I have seen videos with the craziest editing I have seen and get very few views. I was listening to mrbeast and he was talking about the purple cow effect, which is that you do something different than everyone else and that makes you go viral. That is quite an interesting way to see it. For example, "Eckhart Tolle will run for president" HAHAHA I would instantly watch. Of course then also you have to deliver on that video title, so it doesn't become clickbait. So for my latest videos I have been trying to be as original and sometimes I have to think an hour before coming up with a title or thumbnail. Also I have seen some people blow up without editing at all which always blow my mind, like what the hell are these people doing, it doesn't even seem they have a strategy.

@Xonas Pitfall oh yes that is a good idea, looking at outliers from 1k to 50k is definitely a good one. I think I should look more at the smaller channels then, because the bigger channels can go very viral but also their data isn't really valuable if you have a smaller channel. Yes I feel editing is something I am still learning, I think people also enjoy clips, like in streams. It kind of is the streamer area right now, so I am thinking of making more videos that almost are stream like, but then edited and still within my niche. Is that your channel btw?

Today went better, I watched some things on Owen about decision, persona and self judgement fatigue, I think that set things in perspective I realised that I am acting like an introvert as I am introverted lol, but that when I am doing this social stuff I should act more like an extrovert, aka get energy from conversations by removing the fatigues, the energy leakages. That is why going crazy in a club would work, because you just talk with everyone and you spend very little time in between sets, not out of rushing to talk to people quickly, but to just let yourself take action fully without holding back or judging yourself. Something I am still figuring out to navigate, but something I wanted to share. @LifeEnjoyer thank you for your answer. Also the idea of introverted people is that they get energy from taking breaks and being alone and I think what Owen is trying to explain is what extroverts naturally feel and that is that you can get more energy from being social. It comes down to energy.

@LifeEnjoyer so what did you do when you were having more down days like I described yesterday? Or that never happend to you?

@LordFall I am not too interested in social circle right now, but if I ever am, I know where to find you hehe

@LordFall yeah I think my life is pretty good, but I have days I am just not feeling it, on good days it goes super good, but on days like this it just doesn't seem to pick up. Also I had a good day yesterday, I always feel I have my tougher days after a good day, it is weird like that, I am still trying to figure it out myself and see the patterns. I would say my consistency is good, but my consistency in mood isn't really good as it goes up and down a bit too much.

So I don't use ChatGPT that much, but today I had a good idea. I was reminded of how I felt before and after succeeding in different areas of my life, and I wanted to see what the commonalities were between the mindset that brought me success and the mindset that didn't create my desired outcomes. I wanted to find the common denominator. I'm quite satisfied with this list, so I thought I'd share it here as well: First mindset Second mindset -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Acts Waits or quits Creates value Expects rewards Learns from feedback Takes feedback personally Accepts uncertainty Wants guarantees Keeps generating opportunities Stops creating opportunities Focuses on what can control Focuses on what can't

A friend of mine is now leaving the border of Ukraine and he is going through such headaches. When I left Ukraine it was the same, it is such a headache, being in Ukraine is scary, but what is even scarier is the idea that you will be locked in the country forever. At the border you don't get checked once, but twice and I had to show all my bags, explain everything, because I was the only non-Ukrainian citizen to leave and they thought I might would be a Russian spy or something lol. The border is the main reason I probably won't go back to Ukraine, it is the worst border experience ever and it took atleast 4 hours. Probably for good reason, but still a horrible experience. I was happy to be able to leave the country and you could feel everyone be peaceful again entering the bus after the border. You only know peace after going through all of that and making it out.

I have two questions for you. What do you specifically mean by more shallow shit? Also what do you mean by making better content specifically?

@Meeksauce When I was around 20 or so, I used to feel the same way as you. I was angry at women instead of working on myself. I thought I was doing everything right, I thought that it was the woman's problem. Looking back on it, I was a bit immature. It was easy to feel like a victim instead of taking accountability. It was easy to feel hurt and pain, instead of gaining confidence over time. When you start to understand what works, which is to gain confidence. You start to see that I can either bitch about why woman are not choosing me OR I can actually do something about it and start approaching woman. Also delayed gratification is important, like you might have to work on your confidence for a few years, depending on how bad it is right now. Being angry at woman only helps you to get more angry at woman, it won´t help you get to have good connections with woman. This desperation for woman to acknowledge you will all go away, it is just a question of when you will start to do the actual work. Which is to approach, talk to many woman, learn how to attract woman and not be focused on one single crush, there are much better woman out there then just your crush, trust me.

@Butters I am from the Netherlands myself, I don´t know where you are living, but this isn´t an everyday thing here. You are talking crap or you just have your looks that hook woman, don´t forget the difference between a good looking guy and an average guy, you can´t say the same for someone average-looking.

Coming from the Netherlands, we value direct communication. We are famous for saying things as they are. Whether it is ugly, beautiful, or anything in between, we don't care if we come across as rude, as long as we are honest. Yet I have found this approach to be quite ineffective and, honestly, a bad way to communicate. Imagine if you said everything directly. Instead of hopping on a sales call for an hour or so, you would just have someone tell you in the first minute, "This is the product, this is how much it costs, are you in or not?" It would be an awful way to conduct a sales call. Even calling it a sales call would be too direct; you call it a discovery call, a free coaching session, or whatever. The opposite of the Dutch, who are very direct, are the Brazilians, who are about as indirect as can be. I think that is why many people find them attractive, because they are flowy, go with the flow, and don't say, "BUY THIS NOW." They slowly get to the point. The only problem with being indirect is if you never get to the point. Imagine a sales call that lasted 15 hours before you ever offered your product. That wouldn't be good either, so I guess there is a balance. At some point, you need to get to the point. Another thing I was thinking about was dogs, lol. They don't just hump each other. They sniff, they play, they become friends, and the male dog might try to show off his dominance by barking or whatever. After enough sniffing each other and playing, they go for it. Being social is all about being indirect, in my opinion. The idea that being social is therefore dishonest could also be a question to be raised, because you are basically delaying the actual intention behind why you started the conversation. Now, of course, if you have no agenda in the first place, then it is honest because you are not trying to lead it anywhere. But if you have some form of agenda, which I think every sales call and every conversation with a beautiful girl kind of has, then the more indirect you are, the more, in that sense, you are being dishonest. Yet if you are very direct, this doesn't work well, isn't a good approach, and isn't very social. These are just some thoughts I had today. I thought sharing them would be interesting, and I'd also like to hear what you guys think.

@Leo Gura fair enough lol

@Butters and even if that is the case, most girls will need more than just a 1 min conversation. Try to do the same thing 11 in the morning next to a bus stop. Also they won't outright ask, because they are woman, it is not normal for a woman to ask you to have sex with her, that is why indirectly talking exists, both the girl and guy might talk indirectly, she might try to hint something to him and he is hinting to her, this is being social instead of being autistic and directly trying to sleep with a girl.

@Karmadhi I don't think no one likes Russians except russians themself.

@Zenterus small world

@ZenAlex Part of getting older is also to feel less excited I guess. I think right now you have a stable life, you have overcome allot, you have overcome your OCD and adhd, that in itself is like a miracle to be honest. You might not feel amazing, but imagine someone who had all of those issues you had? They would die to be in your position right now. They would want nothing more than to feel healed. So some gratitude will help and maybe even helping people deal with that, not to make money per say, but life isn't all about you and your happiness, but also about giving back to those who need it and you seem like a great example to help those people who had these issues. I think purpose is more important then happiness and excitement.

@ExodiaGearCEO Do you feel you could transmute that into something productive? I think that, as a gambler, you're naturally drawn to taking risks for potential rewards, and in a way, that can be a powerful trait when it comes to entrepreneurship. It might be too early to think about this, but I like the idea of channeling that drive into building a business or following your purpose instead. When you realize that gambling doesn't make you richer but actually makes you poorer, you begin to see that the desire to create wealth isn't the problem, the path you chose was. I still believe you could become a successful entrepreneur and build something meaningful. Again, it might be too early since you're just coming out of this addiction, but I could see this being part of your future path. Or maybe I'm just projecting onto you, who knows. Anyway, good luck on your journey.

I have noticed lately the fear of being seen. It is something I noticed in myself and therefor also can spot in others. It is the idea that it is `scary` to be seen in public, the whole idea of being caught, even think about pick up, the idea that someone sees you doing pick up, almost like you are trying to hide what you do. Why can´t you be an open book? Why can't you draw attention to yourself? Why do you have to hide? Why do you feel uncomfortable being seen, noticed? Why is it akward? Because you are deep down afraid of being seen. Imagine you fall on the floor, is it embarassing if no one sees you? No. Yet if 100 or 1000 people see it, it is sooo embarassing? But why? Because of this fear of being seen, being generally aswell as authentically seen. So instead of pushing yourself more, maybe it is good to dive into this fear of being seen. As an experiment draw more attention to yourself and see what comes up. For example dress in a way that draws allot of attention to you, something crazy, colourful, unique whatever. There are many ways to dress to stand out and to draw attention to you, you don't have to walk naked on the street, but something more bold. Why is it bad people are looking at you and your clothes? What bad could happen? Or another exercise could be to be a bit louder, like start talking a bit louder on the street or if you do pick up, start doing pick up almost over the top loud. Not as a strategy to get laid HAHAHAHA, but to dive into that feeling of being seen. After that exercise, sit with yourself, sit with that fear, and let it go. Put your hand on your heart. Breathe in love and breathe out the fear, shake it loose and tell yourself "it is okay to be seen in my own authenticity" This is the real inner work, real release work, to be okay with being seen and even love yourself being seen. Aren't you such an amazing person who is worthy to be noticed and seen by others? I think you are and we can't give our gift to the world if we already get afraid by drawing some attention to ourselves. It is not that you have to do these exercises every day, but once or three times already gives you some reference experiences and will help you to let go of a big chunk of this fear.