Preety_India

When I get married I want to do this Indian makeup on my wedding day..

.

I'm fascinated by Indian Art.

Add later.

I feel weak.

I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD I suffer PTSD

I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone I deserve to be alone

I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love I don't deserve love

Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me Nobody can love me

At some point I simply want to throw everything away and simply be myself. It's really not my responsibility to make someone understand me.

I don't know exactly where my feelings take me, maybe to a deep dark place. I shouldn't have to speak if there's nobody to listen. I shouldn't have to try if trying wouldn't work anyway.

Was I the only one who always felt emotions? Was there nobody at the end of the bridge?

Why to even put false pretenses if just generally I'm considered worth nothing? Who cares what someone thinks about me anymore? I would be lying to myself if my heart felt heavy and I didn't let the tears flow. Why should I hide and what is it worth? Just an incomplete piece of poetry that remains redundant and gathers dust.

I guess the luxury of being delicate and fragile was never afforded to me. I wasn't built that way.. I was built to fight all the time because that's the only way I had learned to live. The more I'm hurt, the more I have begun to turn inward. Love doesn't do it to me. Force does. I always needed someone to push me a little further on my part, I hate being analytical about things. Is it even worth it in my case. Sometimes I would simply keep rambling like a lunatic, there was no beginning and no end to whatever that existed in my life. The only thing I needed to do was collapse deeper and deeper into my own walls. Is there a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow? Maybe not. Now I realize why this kind of writing is important, why this kind of venting is important and I'll let it become a part of my fabric, I'll learn eventually the way others learn.

The road to all these neuroses was to find freedom. Yea like I learned today to be fully vulnerable. Sometimes I was scared of being vulnerable as well.

Why should I care anymore what someone thinks about me? If someone truly understood me, I wouldn't need to defend..

@Michael569 that means a lot. Thank you Michael.

Replies like these is exactly why trolls justify themselves and feel stronger

@Marcel OK. Thank you

I have had thoughts about this in my mind since the last week and I wasn't able to fully express it,which as usual I just generally suck at. But this topic is very important to my spiritual growth. It is about loving Vibration and the yellow color which means sunshine. This color represents harmony to me. There is a deeper truth hidden in the word harmony. I want to figure it out. I have it figured out yet it's not too clear in my head right now. Will add notes later. Half baked ideas that is

@Cykaaaa just because you find someone to be annoying doesn't mean they have to be at the mercy of your judgement and negativity Maybe grow a bit tolerant of other's freedom and space and spare them your annoyance

@Marcel ?

@Someone here then your wording is very wrong. Using words like "worth trolling" is completely opposite of what you have written now.

@Someone here then your word is very wrong. Using words like "worth trolling" is completely opposite of what you have written now.

@Someone here trolls exist because of people like you.