Preety_India

Will put all my recordings here.

So here is my first singing sample of the song Silent Night Holy Night by Sinead O'Connor, only the first few lines That's one of my favorite songs I hope you enjoy.

words-in-a-dream maple-leaves-and-acorns fixing-myself nobody-that-i-can-trust waking-up-part-2personal-intimate-journal back-pain-journal bad-dreams-look-into-causes notes emotional-healing-part-2-using-gifsclosed-journal my-singing-skills-part-2 my-diy-art-and-decorations-journal photo-journal-please-no-comments being-dominated-and-victimhood-no-comments peeling-layers-no-comments

Last night's dream the words were quite unclear.. I'm generally quite terrible at recalling dreams. So a few of those words are - tail, train, machine.

I somehow can't explain the feeling I get when my mother is angry. It feels like absolute hell. People don't realize what narcissistic abuse looks like. I can't look into her eyes, it's awful. Her face gives me nightmares. She has murderous rage in her eyes to the point that she could literally kill me She even said at one point that she won't hesitate to kill me. She can be absolutely heartless and cold. That's the face of mental illness. Sometimes I feel like I can't take it anymore. It is awful. I go into a dark self destructive mode I wish things were different. I wish my father never suffered the way he did.. My father's death is too heavy on me. I can't even think of it. The trauma from his death is severe.

There's something that has gone wrong between my mom and my sibling. They both aren't talking to each other. And my sibling has started talking to me. But my sibling is constantly asking me whether my mother is complaining about this or not. I have absolutely no idea what is going on. I feel like I don't know what to do I feel weak, exhausted and tired. Been suffering from insomnia for weeks over this It feels like suicidal feelings are back after a long time. It's hard when your own family is so against you and is completely selfish. My mother took all my money last year It's just awful. I so wish things could be better.

Sometimes I feel like my mother has no humanity. That she can see me dying and yet she won't do anything about it

I don't think I can reconcile with my mother ever. I can't stand her selfishness. She pretends like she cares but she doesn't. I have seen her act selfish for years. She has not a drop of mercy. I think it's time for me to call it quits with her for good and simply move on and take care of myself. There's no point in thinking that things will be good with her. She is a big bully and an abuser. She will never change. She loves a sense of control, it gives her happiness But I wish to move on and away from her

Try not to focus on negativity. That makes a lot of things easier

@Marcel Hehe

One way is to keep everything neutral. Remove this Chain link. An/lo - - - - - >mo/Y - - - > mi - - - - > ma - - - - - > my - - - - - - > so_m - - - - - > zi- - - - - - >eth- - - - - - >hul- - - - - - - >rapl- - - - - >esi- - - - - - > gin- - - -> me/bar- - - >- - - - >- - - - ->ego - - - - - - - - - >zer- - - - - - - - - -> k gh - - - - >the big l- - - - - - - - - >- - - - - - - - -> arch- - - - - - - - - - - >- - - - - -> - - - - - - -> barb- - - - - - - - - - - - - -> gest- - - - - - - - - - - >maze - - - - - - - - - -> - -- - - - - - - - - - >- - - - - - - - - - - >pros- - - - - - - - - - - >- - - - - - - - - -> - - - - - - - -> - - - - - - - - - -> - - - - - - - - >flow - - - - - - - ->knowledge - - - - - - - - >- - - - - - - >- - - - - - - - >- - - - - - - - ->shere - - - - - - - ->- - - - - - - - - - >- - - - - - - - >- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -> - - - - - - - - - >ila- - - - - - - - - - - -> - - - - - - - - -> - - - - - - - - >funny - - - - - - - > Lmfao - - - - - - - - - - +-¦ -

On this forum there's literally nobody I can trust (except my love of course) But I have realized that there's nobody to trust. My trust has gone significantly lower much lower than before. Now I just don't talk to anyone and will never talk to anyone. It's like everyone is just the same, maybe just a few shades different. There is nobody left. Anyone who messages me I'm just gonna delete it or leave it without reply, just don't care about me..

Remember to be cheerful. As Bob says.

This is a good one .

@Marcel I love this.

This was an amazing one.

@Marcel thank you so much.

This one is awesome.

I find this fascinating. It reminds me of how mysterious everything around us this.

I'm going to do this later.

This was awesome.

This journal will be devoted to things that I love or would love to do at some point.

I just love acorns.

I absolutely love this.