Preety_India

Wasn't Lawrence Krauss accused of something?

my-youtube-videos freeing-myself-from-Delusions practicing-self-honesty

You should reduce sugar in your diet.

I'm trying meditation. Lets see if it works. Recently been experiencing a lot of anxiety.

This seems good. This has been on my mind for such a long time. Will bookmark this post

Thank you for being there

Planner Check Microsoft account subscription for Microsoft word Write romm statements in daybook Use newly created journal notes on other websites. 99.in Tax work. Check verify and cancel all subscriptions. TALKU. Omg you're definitely that.

@Marcel I'm so grateful for you I could cry right now.

I'll get some coke for the guests now.. I'm so tired with this drama. And I'm supposed to keep up appearances when I'm dog tired with lack of sleep, feeling anxious, body aches and I'm supposed to smile at guests??? Yea apparently...... For appearances.

She used to play loud music when my dad was tired home from work and sleeping I was barely 13 years old.. I used to wake up and yell — "mom, dad is sleeping, stop the music." And she wouldn't listen I grew up feeling sorry for my dad all the time.

Yesterday she put on the music so loud, the entire house was filled with it. I went out into the garden for peace of mind. Who Plays music this loud that everyone wakes up? No manners at all I'm so angry. I have to deal with someone who is low conscious and cheap I just hate this crap I like decent peaceful people, not people who play loud music and don't have any consideration for how another person might suffer. And then she will turn around and tell me that she cares about me. No you don't care about me. You only care about yourself. You never cared about your kids or husband. That's why he died early tolerating your nonsense. You made him work 24/7..because you wanted money. You didn't give a damn about his complaints. And then you made your children work. You only wanted kids as slaves. You only wanted kids so they could fulfill your needs and desires There was no consideration for what the kids had to go through. We were just collateral for you. Part of my internal misogyny directly comes from her. Some women are so selfish towards their children. They use their children for their own needs. She was a pushy helicopter mother who never gave a damn if I was sick and dying.

One day I was sleeping on a cold hard floor with only a blanket for comfort. And this dumb woman took my blanket and gave it to a guest and I slept in the Coldness all night feeling feverish next morning. I was a kid back then. How can someone do this to their kids? Absolutely zero consideration for their own child. I had a thick sweater that I had got on a London trip It was really thick and great for protection during winter. And one day I saw my maid wearing it I was like what the fuck? And my mom told me she gave it to her because she thought it wasn't too fancy. I'm like what —you gave my sweater to the maid, without even asking me, because that was the only sweater that gave me some protection during winter? I'm absolutely angry with this woman for constantly breaking my boundaries ever since I was a kid? She has ruined my health as a child by her stupidity and I'm still having to pay the price of her negligence.

Update 7 December 25 I woke up feeling anxious and stressed out. If I sleep on the floor, it will hurt my back. I just woke up sleeping on the chair. And my body is hurting terribly.. All her nonsense that I have to deal with. So tired. My eyes are burning. If I don't get proper sleep, I don't feel good. I feel like punching a wall right now. I'm so done with this woman's drama. Here I can't sleep and she is worried about guests. I have never seen a more dumber person in my life. Everyone cares about their family first. She cares about what other people think more than she would about her husband or kids. I am like Fuck that... You bitch. You should first care about your husband and your children, you dumb bitch. I'm so angry, the way I get treated all the time, like a piece of toilet paper. How dare can a woman treat her own children like disposables???

I made a wreath.

Update 6 December 25 So today is 25 December and my chest is pounding. My mom has invited some guests today. I don't want to meet them because I'm feeling anxious.. I barely had any sleep. The problem that I'm describing here. I just wish to sleep in his arms and forget all my worries.

Update December 25 I'm still feeling a bit drained. It's 5 am now.

Update 2 December 25 I need to kinda fast track my stuff. Sometimes I feel like time is running out on me. I either do stuff or face consequences. I'm trying so hard to get away from my mom. It's now or never. Update 3 December 25 Update 4 December 25 Update 5 December 25

Update 1 December 25 I still don't have a proper bed to sleep. The bed that I'm currently sleeping in is causing me neck pain. I feel like nobody gives a fuck how I feel. I need to move out of the bed I'm sleeping in. And make a proper arrangement for a bed. I have been sleeping on chairs and suffering insomnia. I got a Christmas wreath and a Christmas tree. I decorated my Christmas tree. I still feel awful. I need to try some relaxation exercises. 15 updates throughout the day looks okay to me. This is a good way of keeping track of my emotions. Update 6 December 25

Update 7 December 24 I have permanently moved into the garden. Update 8 December 24 Hun I really enjoyed the Popsicles you made for me Update 9 December 24 I need a couple of water bottles. A makeshift bed. A lip balm. Some blankets. My keys. A lavender talc. A stand to keep my lunch plate. A yoga mat. And I'm done with the arrangement. And I need a book to read. Update 10 December 24 @marcel You're definitely that. Hehe Update 11 December 24 Update 12 December 24 Update 14 December 24 Sometimes morbid thoughts run through

.. Why do I feel offended and how can I work on it?

@Marcel and I jumped from INTP to INFJ-T. Lmao. I still resonate a lot with INTP.

@Ulax I did handwriting. My room got filled with sheets of paper and books that it started to fill the whole room. So i understood that there is no other option than digital journaling. Handwriting is only possible if you got little to write But if you were to observe patients then they have to write a lot on average. Handwriting won't help you for long.

And TYT is junk with anti - white propaganda. I'm a leftist liberal SJW type but even I can't stand the bias of TYT - clear as day. Someone needs to call them out for spewing lies.

@Marcel I forgot what your mbti was. Mine was INFJ-T last time I did I think yours was ENTJ something if I'm not mistaken

@Marcel not pressuring you. Just telling you. I'm sorry if it felt in any other way. Did not mean it that way.