Preety_India

•✿✿✿⊱✸⊰✿✿✿• •⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰••⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰••⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰•

•⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰••••••••••••••••••••••••••⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰• ...

•⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰••••••••••••••••••••••••••⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰• ... I suffered a lot of brain fog during my Covid . It lasted 4 weeks for me. I felt disillusioned and difficulty walking thinking. My Covid lasted from January 29 to February 18. The brain fog continued even after the major symptoms were gone. During this time I wasn't sure about what I was posting. My posts were erratic and nonsense. Take your time.

•✿✿✿⊱✸⊰✿✿✿• •⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰••⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰••⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰• •⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰• •⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰• •✿✿✿⊱ ♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥ ⊰✿✿✿•

•✿✿✿⊱✸⊰✿✿✿• •⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰• Edit here. •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿•

•✿✿✿⊱ ♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥ ⊰✿✿✿•

Keeping a tab on my interaction with this forum.

•✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿•

Just focus on the positive. •✿✿✿⊱ ♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥ ⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿•

•✿✿✿⊱✸⊰✿✿✿• •⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰• •⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰••••••••••••••••••••••••••⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰• ... There will always be stuff that is triggering. Don't pay attention to it and ignore it first and foremost. Since triggering content is allowed, you don't have much of an option other than to simply go with it. But this is the internet. It can't be completely censored. Plus you can't lose the advantage of being here just because of the triggering content. How to detect the devil? Divide content into two parts - triggering and non triggering. Only deal with the non triggering part. Do not respond to the triggering part since it upsets you. Don't even deal with it and you know the best solution for the devil is misery/inaction. Whenever the devil tries too hard, remember this song and it's tune. Imagine the devil throwing things at you and you simply deflecting it so badly the devil cries oooooooooof. Beauty queen of only eighteen, she had some trouble with herself He was always there to help her, she always belonged to someone else I drove for miles and miles, and wound up at your door I've had you so many times, but somehow I want more I don't mind spending every day Out on your corner in the pouring rain Look for the girl with the broken smile Ask her if she wants to stay a while And she will be loved And she will be loved Tap on my window, knock on my door, I want to make you feel beautiful I know I tend to get so insecure, it doesn't matter anymore It's not always rainbows and butterflies, it's compromise that moves us along, yeah My heart is full and my door's always open, you come anytime you want, yeah I don't mind spending every day Out on your corner in the pouring rain Look for the girl with the broken smile Ask her if she wants to stay a while And she will be loved And she will be loved And she will be loved And she will be loved I know where you hide, alone in your car Know all of the things that make you who you are I know that goodbye means nothing at all Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls, yeah Tap on my window, knock on my door, I want to make you feel beautiful I don't mind spending every day Out on your corner in the pouring rain, oh Look for the girl with the broken smile Ask her if she wants to stay a while And she will be loved And she will be loved And she will be loved And she will be loved Yeah, yeah I don't mind spending every day (Ooh, ooh) Out on your corner in the pouring rain (Please don't try so hard to say goodbye) Btw this guy sings better. •✿✿✿⊱ ♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥ ⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱ ♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥✿✿♥♥♥ ⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱ ♥♥♥✿✿♥??✳️✳️??♥✿✿♥♥♥ ⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿• •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿•

•✿✿✿⊱✸⊰✿✿✿• •⊱⊱⊱⊱✸⊰⊰⊰⊰• Edit here. •✿✿✿⊱????✳️?✳️????⊰✿✿✿•

Today is March 11. Put new updates here.

I don't know why the previous topic was locked, that was ridiculous that it was locked when I was asking a genuine question. Am I really dumb or is this just a thought? Is it even healthy to ask myself this. I have been questioning my own intelligence recently in terms of how I make choices in my life. I don't think I have made good choices. I think consistently making bad choices could be a sign of foolishness? Am I very dumb? And please don't answer it as simply yes or no. I'm looking for some insights into what a person can do if they think they have done some dumb things in life and it they don't want their pattern of behavior to repeat. This question comes to my mind very often. I don't know if it's healthy to ask myself such a question. Because it's hard to analyze myself. So i think it's best to ask other people. Am I really stupid or is this just my insecurity? I'm not talking about IQ here. Just general. Also is there a way to know if you're acting stupid in your life. Additional info — I was born underweight and I was born a premature baby according to my mom. I was good at school grades but not good at social skills, and lacked general wisdom. I'm not sure if my birth factors count. But just wanted to throw in that info. Also is there a difference between dumb and immature? I did some dumb things in life like not looking after my own well being and not getting out of toxic relationships. Also I'm a bit slow. Quite slow. Much slower than others.. This is not just a comparison but an observation. I'm open to criticism. Don't be afraid to tell me if you think I'm dumb according to you. Someone said to me that it's a good sign if I'm thinking about whether you are dumb or not. Because stupid people don't understand that they are stupid. "The Dunning-Kruger effect is a type of cognitive bias in which people believe that they are smarter and more capable than they really are. Essentially, low ability people do not possess the skills needed to recognize their own incompetence. The combination of poor self-awareness and low cognitive ability leads them to overestimate their own capabilities. The term lends a scientific name and explanation to a problem that many people immediately recognize—that fools are blind to their own foolishness. As Charles Darwin wrote in his book The Descent of Man, "Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge." https://www.verywellmind.com/an-overview-of-the-dunning-kruger-effect-4160740 But I doubt this. I do believe that even people who generally act dumb or foolish can actually question their stupid decisions if they see they are constantly getting into trouble. Help me with some insights. I'm looking for the kind of intelligence that helps a person take proper decisions in important areas like relationships and family where emotions tend to cloud your judgement. Also what kind of potential or intelligence (I mean how would you define it), is necessary for a person to be good at looking after their well being? I mean how would you define such capability? I seriously lack in the department of "well-being of self" and I tend to be quite stupid around it. I'm trying hard to figure out why I'm being so stupid with my own well being and how I can resolve this?

I'll be spending my next 5 hours in building an entire timeline of events. What are the events that happened in the past 18-20 days. January 29..I get Covid I suddenly catch Covid after barely recovering from another flu just a week before. Leo is not making videos anymore in the first week of February. This is the post where users begin to vent. leo-why-is-there-no-new-videos I'm suffering Covid in the first week of February and it's really bad. I cannot even breathe, high fever. On February 7, a member here slides into my dm and tells me that he needs to talk to me. I tell I'm extremely ill and I need my time. I try to avoid conversations with people because my condition is awful. My brain is totally inflamed and I couldn't move at all.. I was feeling paralyzed and sick. Thanks Covid. Another important detail is that I wasn't vaccinated. I keep drinking juices like guava,orange, pomegranate and paracetamol to recover. But the recovery is super slow.. - Feb 10 By February 10 I'm completely immersed in taking care of myself. I'm hopeful. I also make a thread. this-is-so-funny-you-gotta-watch-this I'm trying to keep my spirits up. -Feb 12 I am focusing on political news. I learn about the Ottawa Protests. I'm scared. I don't know what to make of it. This is the first time I see the validity of the right wing. My foray into politics begins. I write about the orange beret. I also make a thread about the Ottawa protests. These protests are going to be a significant event in my life in terms of cognitive shift. This is thread on the Ottawa Protests. trucker-protests-in-ottawa - Feb 13 - I start the Orange beret. This is the beginning of distrust with the forum. I'm disappointed in someone as I realize they are racist in a closeted way. I make this post out of deep disappointment realizing that racism is always going to exist one way or another and disadvantaged people will always face racism whether they like it or not. why-does-racism-exist -Feb 14 is Valentines day. My mother threw a bottle at me. I felt suicidal after that. I'm still suffering Covid. Leo uploads a video on Solipsism and immediately within hours takes it down. Members on the forum are confused by Leo's sudden and abrupt decision. This is the post where he states that. taking-down-solipsism-video - Feb 15. I'm just recovering from Covid 19. My covid symptoms began on somewhere around January 29 and continued till February 14 after which recovery begins. At the same time Leo releases Solipsism video. - Feb 16, Leo Gura makes a post on banning certain users. This was the post. following-users-banned - Feb 16, 2022. Leo Gura makes a post strict enforcement. This is the post. more-stringent-enforcement-is-coming The post/thread ends abruptly on February 19. This thread causes many users to lose interest in the forum and forum population suddenly declines significantly. - Feb 17 many users have left by this time. Forum looks weird and empty. Awkward. In the same thread about stringent enforcement I also made a post about authoritarian users.. - Feb 18/ 19 I make a post on February 14 of putting a gun to my head after my mother had thrown a bottle at me. This is the post. I have to get the post locked by February 16. I-feel-like-putting-a-gun-to-my-head Me and my husband are married the same month in the second week of February. I announce my marriage on February 17. - Feb 18 is my happy day. But I'm still extremely nervous because of whatever happened between me and my mom. I suffer multiple panic attacks through the day and zero sleep. My system is totally spiralling out of control as a result of my altercation with my mother. It completely traumatizes me. - Feb 18 Someone predicts a bad situation between Ukraine and Russia. This is the post do-you-think-putin-will-start-a-war Fears of a war begin. - Feb 19 I'm still contemplating whether I want to be on the forum. - Feb 20 I'm thinking that I should not be on the forum. Russia Ukraine War begins on February 20. I don't receive any information or news until a few days later. - Feb 21 spl day. I wear a green gown. My husband is with me for the whole day. Nahm was demoted on February 21, my D day. I'm very upset by whatever is revealed. I also realize that day that mods aren't as perfect as I thought and I couldn't trust mods anymore. Its also the day I make this post on how to love myself. In the days between February 14 when my mother threw a bottle at me and February 21 the d day, I realize that the only thing that can save me is Self love. how-to-love-myself This realization had previously come on February 18 when I make this post in the meditation section. you-have-to-go-through-intense-fear-to-experience-love This is my most valuable insight (and also my most valuable post) on this forum of all the 4 years I spent here. This came to me after 4 years of struggle. Both threads were extremely valuable. - Feb 22.. I argue with Adeptus Psychonautica about why he constantly criticizes Leo. This is the post why-not-use-a-paywall-to-improve-the-quality-of-this-forum - Feb 23 People begin to predict the possibility of WW3 because of Russian tension with Ukraine. These are the posts. ww3-how-bad-is-the-ukrain-situation russia-ukraine-war -Feb 24 I'm trying to assess the Ukraine situation. I feel very awful. I can't believe the possibility of WW3. My mom constantly tells me that WW3 is a real possibility. I shut her down. I'm too pissed. I just can't think straight anymore. I can't make sense of world events. It's turning my world upside down. I immediately grab resources on WW2 and what I discover will change my life forever. I discover the Holodomor situation and I'm totally terrified how this was never brought to the public in history textbooks. I'm very upset. I suffer intense panic attacks after reading about it. I spend the next few days immersed into learning about the WW2 situation. And it's very tragic and frightening to even contemplate on. -Feb 25 I'm still reading about WW2. -Feb 26 I'm still reading about WW2. This is one of the most traumatizing events in my life. I spend the whole night terrified and crying in the bathroom (even feeling self destructive and screaming because I can't take it), I am constantly getting in and out of the bathroom because I'm suffering panic attacks and I'm going insane. I just cannot deal with learning all the cruelty during WW2. This is a significant event and day in my life because now I understand how the world works and how sad and bad humanity really is. I'm screaming and it hurts. -Feb 27 I try my best to recover from all the panic attacks and the awful feelings I felt. I try to get some rest and not think too much about it. But it's still in the back of my head. I have reached 1944 in terms of reading about WW2. Still not there yet. -Feb 28 Anxiety is down and I'm feeling better. Yet I'm still reading and following through WW2. I have reached 1945 and 1947. I cannot read anymore because every time I read I suffer anxiety and have to constantly turn away from reading. It is so bad. -Feb 28 John Paul incident. I feel stressed out after the argument. I decide that I don't want the forum anymore or that I should not open ask anymore questions in the forum and simply focus on helping people. I end the journal Feb 23 - Feb 28 successfully following through with it. I start a new journal titled March 1- March 8 but I'm not able to follow through and I will need to abandon the concept of weekly journals about a week later from March 1, disappointing because I thought it would work but I become seriously ill again. - March 1 I suffer leg injury from a fall in the bathroom. It's over for me for the next few days. I walk with the help of a stick. Trying to relax as much as possible right now. It's March 1. I need to fill my orange beret journal. Juicy birdy insights. I also have my Zegglife trademark logo ready. This is my brand and I'm proud of my brand. This is the logo I create or take from the internet. It's a willow tree. This becomes the symbol for my holistic life and purpose. On March 1 I come up with the concept of the Emperor Archetype who I call Emperor Olaf inspired by how people can live happily under a benevolent king/Emperor who won't be tyrannical like Putin. While being bedridden due to leg injury I also start my new YouTube channel called Zegglife. - March 2.. Lot of suggestions are submitted to the forum. I start the journal 'Upgrading my Political Knowledge.' I start a journal on March 3 about favorable interactions on the forum to avoid arguments. interactions-on-this-forum - March 3 John Paul leaves. -March 3 I learn about Russia and Britain in WW2. I am lying on the floor crying and thinking how could this even be possible. I am going through a cathartic process. I can't imagine that these people are Christian. The soldiers are Christian. How could they rape women? I can't imagine this. This is an Abrahamic religion. I'm terrified. I decide it's time to abandon Christianity. The God of Abraham cannot be a good God. I make up my mind. I abandon Christianity on March 3. I make a thread on it. im-abandoning-christianity - March 4 I start the journal 'My Religious Transformation' - March 5 I start the journal 'The Roman(magnum opus).' This is my journal entry on that day. "I'm so happy right now. Extremely happy. I no longer need Christianity although I still like the teachings of Christ. Now I have the religion of Deihism that fixes my spiritual issues. ⚖️... This is the temporary symbol, the balance" That day I invent my own religion and name it Deihism. - March 6 I start a journal 'Everyday people' to document the struggles and victories of everyday people. - March 7 I start a journal on Christianity. I want to explore both Judaism and Christianity and learn more from these religions. On March 7, I discover a channel with an extremely feminine woman and I'm very impressed with that. And I decide to explore femininity in more depth. So I start threads on femininity. One thread titled "What do guys on this forum consider as feminine?" what-do-guys-on-this-forum-consider-as-feminine I go deeper into concepts on March 7. I realize that I'm unable to complete the weekly journal March 1 - March 8 because of my mental health struggles due to various issues including the war. So I abandon that journal. I start a new journal March 7. It includes many useful insights that I arrive at on that day. On March 7 I write this entry in my journal - " I'm unable to follow the old format. So today is March 7 and I don't want to put an end date on my journal. I just want to keep tracking as long as I want. All my thoughts, emotions and actions and insights are going to be here. This liberates me from a time constraint. " I also realize that Kamala Harris has a very feminine smile and is a good role model. I want to see this woman's smile everyday. It's kinda uplifting. She looks like a cool mother figure to me. - March 8 I write a curious comment in my journal " I'm so fed up with bias." The comment is inspired by the thread "What do guys on this forum consider as feminine?" especially by this comment what-do-guys-on-this-forum-consider-as-feminine I kinda get tired of arguing on the forum and fall asleep. I wake up feeling better and then I write my wonderful insight here Insight I also start the journal 'I don't think I'm very feminine on the same day. - March 9 I start the journal 'How must we be as a nation.' I also want to apply the example of a nation to life. I start the journal 'driftwood' and it explores general thoughts. Drifting mind. By March 9 I realize how important femininity is to my Iife. - March 10 I have understood that femininity helps me more than anything. I only want to be surrounded by feminine women and feminine men. That way I stay safe. And I feel much better and energized with femininity. I feel aggressed upon by masculinity. I can't take it anymore. I'm changing everything in my life for the better and I want to have a fresh start in my life using feminine principles. Masculinity is harmful to me. It caused me permanent damage. Feminists in this regard can be damaging to women. I also made threads on cultivating femininity.

Blue Oak, your post means a lot to me. I don't know which part of the world you are from but wherever you are from, you are very kind and respectful and gentle to me, I thank you deeply for that, you understand my trauma like nobody else here, most of whatever you said is very true in regards to my trauma and your description of my trauma resonates very closely with me, you understand me much better than most people, your words are understanding, helpful, insightful and empathetic. I am so glad I read your post. So this is for you. A big thank you from me.

I'm also learning that a more feminine environment is more suited to me and a more masculine environment is more suited to someone else probably, but not me.

In the past 2 weeks I've seen a major shift in myself. I turned away from Christianity and Abrahamic religions in general. I have also learned to balance my political perspectives. And not be too biased but gain a middle ground. I have focused much more on femininity to cope with life's problems and seek a path through it. Lately most of my shift is reflected in the threads I made One is this. I asked about how to be more feminine and what was considered feminine in general. There were a lot of helpful responses. I'm also looking for women in politics to influence my femininity because I don't believe that femininity is only about looks or fashion but something deeper that gives women soft power. Kamala Harris is one such woman that I look up to. She is soft and tough and smart at the same time. She is also a bit of a motherly figure. I never had a motherly figure like her. My mother was like a Tiger Mother, nothing gentle or soft or motherly. I think i was always looking for a mother in older women. Kamala Harris is older than my mom in age but much more softer, wiser, matured and smarter. Go Kamala.

I'm looking for hope, fulfillment and motivation. And I'm turning more and more to the feminine, femininity, fertility, women in politics, to get hope, fulfillment and motivation. I've realized that femininity has been suppressed very badly. And that can be one of the reasons why the world is so chaotic It's important to restore this femininity back. I'm looking for women in positions of power that can inspire me.

I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I was always "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" I'll always be "that girl," "that girl," "that girl" "that girl," "that girl," "that girl"

Listening to these songs. They are so beautiful.

So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone alone Girl you deserve it And you were worth it Girl you deserve it So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone Girl you deserve it And you were worth it Girl you deserve it So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone Girl you deserve it And you were worth it Girl you deserve it So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone alone So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone alone Girl you deserve it And you were worth it Girl you deserve it So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone alone Girl you deserve it And you were worth it Girl you deserve it So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone So I’m waking up, waking up, waking up To being alone, being alone alone Girl you deserve it And you were worth it Girl you deserve it

I removed my comments from the forum to disappear from it entirely. I don't wish to be in a place that doesn't respect women. I'll keep to myself.