Preety_India

Such good, much love, aah yess Honor to the doge I think I'm too tired to deal with this crap. I don't mind hurting you. The feelings are dissipating. I have taken enough bull. So. You are always a dick head. So I just don't have the energy to deal with a dick head anymore. I can't be blamed. I showered affection and attention And... you're ungrateful and incapable. I'm done with that. You are emotionally abusive. You are mean to me. So i am getting out. That's what any person will do. I get shit on like constantly. I have no patience. I don't want to deal with that. You take me for granted just because I love you. So I'm better off without you. I need a person who loves me for who I am. Not a floozy. I need a person who values me, appreciates me. Is attracted to me. Has a chemistry with me. Not someone who just wants me around. You have been so mean to me. Feel like you don't like me. Maybe you do. But you come across as cheap. Past several days I've been drained by your crap. So when you said you didn't need me, that was the last straw.. Too much self respect. Can't take. Call it female ego or whatever. Don't want to deal with that.

Commitment is necessary to bring up children in healthy functional households. With lack of commitment, there is this single parent phenomenon which has adverse psychological effects on children. Nobody likes a non committing partner, not people with high values. People who are okay with lack of commitment do so because they themselves cannot commit. Both men and women get displeased by a non committing partner. It's just counter productive to mental and emotional health. Divorce is not the same as lack of commitment. Divorce happens because of reasons that are unforseen. You cannot simply predict that your marriage will lead to a divorce on the first day. That would be a very pessimistic approach. A sense of commitment shows a sense of responsibility in both men and women. Anyone who does not have this sense of responsibility appear unattractive.

I'm not a native speaker. So forgive me!

I have decided to operate from a perspective of the "brand new me" To be self positive. To have this abundant mindset which is empowering and move away from the low self worth low self esteem scarcity mindset.

Why should an amazing woman like me be with a duldo like you who rates women only based on their looks.. Ughh. Don't need that sleaze. I am happier than ever and discovering the new me. The amazing me now. I am looking for a wonderful life ahead. A truly amazing incarnation.

I will flourish in a nourishing, supportive, positive, Empathetic and empowering environment.

You know all the those tricks and you have done a good job. The Satan is pleased by the performance.

Boundary decides everything between good and bad. When a certain thing crosses a boundary, from good it turns into bad. Certain terms that define abundance mindset Empowering Enriching Kind. Abundance mindset Leadership Empathy mindset Enabling Opposite words Incapable of loving Judgemental Narcissistic Disempowering Unempathetic mindset Unkind Scarcity mindset Unwilling (to help) Disabling Incapable of loving Incapable of unconditional love Selfish Insecurity Lack of Openness Ungenerous Demonizing Unsupportive .. Gaslighting and reverse Gaslighting. Gaslighting is direct. Like 'you're a bad person "... Abuser Reverse Gaslighting. Example " I don't want you to do this so I protest " " you're a bad person for protesting ".. Abuser.

You're the best devil Takes one to know one.

I think I don't look at life this way. Maybe it's just me. But my attitude towards life is based on a bit of stoicism. I think life is meant to be about challenges and obstacles. So I don't categorize people as healthy or unhealthy because in my mind every person is a work in progress. If I were to label a man as low quality or high quality that would probably be a bit unfair but I understand the whole idea. I too have standards when it comes to dating. But my standards are based more on moral values rather than the psychological or physiological makeup of a person. Because I take it this way. I can meet an incredibly wonderful man who has suffered trauma in his life and has anger issues or has other problems because of his past trauma but he is otherwise a wonderful person. I don't want to let go of his redeemable qualities only because it appears that he is lesser than me in some way. So I don't buy into the whole idea of dating up or dating down.. My idea of dating is more about finding a soulmate, having an experience in life rather than calculate the costs or rewards of a potential relationship. The only thing i wish to avoid is a person who is not genuinely in love with me because such an experience is surely not going to align with my emotional needs at all. I believe that life is about struggle. So if I had to struggle with a man I'm in love with then I'm ready for it because in my mind struggle is a part of life and it will be worthwhile to struggle in whatever I can if the man I'm with is worthy of my love whether he is low quality or high quality. Coming to the perspective of standards. I wouldn't ever date a sleazy piece of.... That is part of my value structure and I think that's completely fine. Because why would I compromise with my values and principles. I just wouldn't find any attraction to a man who doesn't match my value frequency.. Which means his mentality and ways of thinking should have to match mine. Coming to the question. I don't know if I can qualify for a high quality woman, I just find the term a bit odd, but all I can say is that I don't think a woman needs to give up or put up with anything when she wants to be with a high quality man, because I believe that in a loving relationship she will face the same struggles as in any other normal relationship and both of them will need to keep the relationship going and face its challenges as they come. The only thing that differentiates a high quality dynamic from a low quality one is every low quality relationship has toxic patterns, energy draining, lack of consideration and selfishness. Both men and women need to avoid relationships that drag them down and don't help with their life goals, value structures and relationships that erode their potential growth.

I WILL NEVER TRUST HER EVER AGAIN. EVER. SHE BROKE MY TRUST

I would have probably just left the gathering. Or asked other women to help me out to get her off me. What she did was so gross. I'm sorry you had to go through such an ordeal. I'd have been stern and probably left her a warning not to do that again. And if it went too far or happened too often despite the warnings then I would have created a scene at the party and screamed and got the other women to notice what's going on. And reported to the police once I got home.. It's not okay at all. I will consider it sexual harassment. Although I would have felt sorry for her homelessness but i would have still not allowed such a behavior. I mean it's hard for me to feel empathetic to people and also scorn them at the same time. I guess it's tricky. She is a total wacko total weirdo. I hope you are safe. The question really is, if she is capable of that, what else is she capable of? So as a word of precaution I would say never be around this woman if you are ever alone like in a bedroom or a bathroom or any room or trust her in any way because she can do harm in the name of fun if she is that much of a nutcase. She can experiment to test your boundaries and go overboard and try some sadistic games with you or something. So better be safe than sorry. Weird behaviors are obviously signs of mental issues but can transform quickly into criminal intent and this often gets ignored. So be on the safer side with this weirdo woman. Now coming to the part of your friend. If she is your true friend, shouldn't your friend understand your boundaries? What kind of a friend takes your concerns lightly? You need to have a sit down with your friend. Tell her straight up that her cousin is weird and you can't stand it and tell her that you value your friendship with her but the cousin needs to stay away and stop the mess. Be upfront and honest but also remind your friend that it's not being offensive to her or her cousin. It's just you standing up for your self respect. I hope you do that. And if your friend is beating around the bush, then there's not much that can be done other than just avoiding this weirdo woman. That weirdo woman needs to be dealt with and put in her place. It's sexual harassment and gross and vile, whatever nonsense she is doing.

Patriarchy was never a beautiful thing no matter how much ever you defend it. It was a system designed specifically for sexual dominance on women so that they can be used for the purpose of men. We need a system of equality neither patriarchy nor matriarchy. It's important to uphold each other's human rights first before considering the gender. The world will be a better place if we considered a woman a human being first and then a woman. The identity with a gender is a part of the low conscious ego trying to protect and prove itself. Rights cannot be given by men or women, they are protected by laws and a system put in place by the majority. It's created by people. And it's stupid thinking that women chose to get oppressed. Nobody chooses to get oppressed. Women were subjugated and subjected to oppression in mass numbers and then convinced and manipulated to believe that this was the only they could live. That's oppression, not choosing oppression, just like nobody chooses to get raped! Get your head out of the sand. In old times, the physically powerful dominated the weaker ones and established a game of survival where certain rules were made for survival and these rules were made in the favor of men to suit their needs in the survival game. We don't need that anymore. Women creating their own systems?.... Gender doesn't work like that. There is nothing like a male system or a female system. Older systems were male dominated because men dominated women, simple. Once the domination is gone, we can have a system which is more equal and gender neutral. Women don't need to create their own systems which excludes men because that's equally as low conscious as patriarchy. We need a custom fit. A system that values the rights of everyone, weak or strong, men, women, trans, mentally ill, disabled, young, old and this should be an all encompassing and accommodating system that accommodates for the needs of everyone. Anyone who thinks that such a system is not viable is operating from low consciousness.

The 3 things that I need are Supreme confidence Abundant enriched mindset Believing in yourself and positivity.

So today I need this I need energy over 9000 via Imgflip Meme Generator

I was hanging out with Neil. And that pissed him off lol. Cute. But I'm not going to leave Neil. He js an important support for me.. My claim to little fame. He has been extremely handy and helpful. He called me amazing and a wonderful person. I'm glad he was with me.

I want to think about the things I would have liked to achieve if I had already achieved my basic goals and dreams.. Having a great quality of life is a blessing.

So I want to think from a state of abundance and plenty and not from a state of lack or deficiency.

The other thing that I'm learning really quick is that the question "what I am really missing out on?" And the answer to it is "a lot" I'm missing out on a lot. And much of this is coming from a scarcity mindset. And there is an abundance mindset which I have never had the opportunity to explore. I have said several times in my journal and elsewhere that I have suffered terrible abuse in my childhood and in my life in general. I have suffered extensive child abuse and it has debilitated me in a big way. The psychological trauma it has caused me is severe. When someone steps on that psychological trauma it gets reignited once again. But I'm trying to cope with things at the same time. Although I don't have the requisite physical stamina to deal with stuff and that impairs me a big deal One big loss or disadvantage of child abuse is the lack of ability to think beyond survival. Since your survival was always in danger as a child you were always ingrained with the thinking that only basic survival is a big achievement. Because of that you don't feel the need to think beyond it about better prospects.. You get stuck in thinking about only how to get through the day or secure a day's meal. I am now realizing that I might have operated in survival mode or deficiency mode for a pretty long time. And I need to get out of it.. When I see abundant people achieving a lot of things I get jealous of them I get hurt, I feel left behind.. I feel like asking myself "why can't I of they can" But the immediate answer that jumps out from my subconscious mind is that they weren't abused like I was.. This either causes a victimhood or victim mentality whether real or feigned.. I want to now think that I want to imagine from a place of abundance, like I already have everything. The seeds are in place. The soil is fertile.. Because I have understood that only from a place of abundance can come growth.. Not from a place of deficiency. Me as a woman can feel better only when I'm happy or enriched.. And when I feel better I will also have growth.. I want to do things that other people do like joining a piano class. I want to do things that abundant people do. People who have already achieved their potential and life purpose..

That's a good thing you are looking for. If a woman is toxic to you then you should move on, as simple as that.. You have to be with a woman who can jive with your goals. Basically what you are saying is nothing but a definition of a healthy woman. A non toxic woman. And that's a rare thing to find. But you will eventually find that if you're more upfront about your intentions in a relationship. You are less likely to be stuck in bad relationships if you're more open about what you really want and decide not to settle for anything less than that.

Can you explain to me what's exactly the meaning of "high quality women", been hearing this phrase a lot very lately from people especially men.. No idea what it is supposed to mean. Never heard it before as much. Next thing is my question to you, why would you date a woman in the first place if she weren't high quality in your opinion. By high quality do you mean a wealthy woman living in places like Los Angeles? Anyway coming to the other part of the stuff you're mentioning. I think you should just let her go. By the looks of it doesn't seem you totally love her or you are not really into her, so maybe she can be happier with someone who truly appreciates her for who she is.. Abandoning and hurting her is far better than having her around but at the same time thinking that she is unworthy of you. That will do her significant damage in the long run unconsciously. If you feel like you can get a better woman in life I think it's high time you move on and spare some suffering on both ends, So if you think that you guys are going to grow apart anyway because of your work, why not grow apart already. My suggestion would be for you to move on and break up with her because clearly she is not the one on your list. Then do what's best for you. What is best for you will also be best for your future partner.

I'm trying to identify with my feelings a little more I felt like trash. I felt crap. I was made to feel unworthy. I was made to feel unwanted, undeserving. Uncared. Unloved. Deprived.. If I'm undeserving I should move on.. The more I identify with my feelings the better it gets for me.. Absolutely important for me to identify with my emotions. Because they are an indication of what's going on.. Of course he will continue to find other ways to hurt me. Because he has to prove that I'm undeserving. He will try to make others look so good.. He will make it seem like heaven.. He has never been empowering. Two things that I have learned out of this experience is that ? Is to pay careful attention to what a person says and record those lines in a diary or something. So I can reflect on them later.. I have understood that doing that is the key to knowing a person deeply enough to make a value judgement on them, to pay careful attention to their words and to keep reflecting on them from time to time and not take it for granted. Don't ignore the red flags. The red flags are in the words. Don't ignore the words and just let it go as temporary anger or slip of the mind.. There's a lot more to the words spoken.. When a person says something, do not be dismissive about it as casual banter or rant. It means something. It says something about that person. They mean something when they say it.. ? Second thing is to completely and fully identify with your emotions.. How do you feel exactly.. Record it. One problem that I consistently faced in all of my relationships is the inability to identify with an emotion. I was not able to do that. That is every time an emotion came, I had it without knowing it, I felt distress but I wasn't able to articulate or describe exactly how I'm feeling.. I didn't know how to label it, how to put it, how to know it, It would generally take some amount of coaxing and some reflection and thought and the right vocabulary to be able to pen it down and say it Like for example in this situation, I couldn't put my finger on what exactly I felt but finally I happened to crystallize this feeling and when I crystallized it, it came into these words " I AM BEING MADE TO FEEL LIKE I DON'T DESERVE IT" " I DON'T FEEL RESPECTED." but to come to. This could be a cognitive dysfunction in me or a personality disorder, I'm not sure. I'm not sure what it's called where you are struggling to deal with your emotions..

I didn't want to feel hurt anymore. Is all I can say. That's why I chose to move on. And it feels amazing after a long time. It feels like great relief at last.. Finally happening. I don't have to carry any guilt anymore.

Finally today is the day I give up It's January 5. And I was absolutely fed up. I took my final decision after a lot of thought. And I took it. And I just decided to take the final call and call things off. It has been a really rough ride and many lessons learned along the way. I need to know whether I want you here or not. Being judged. Then seeing all those pictures. It's too much. I can't handle it anymore so I gave up. I am not evil. I did nothing wrong. I felt like crap. So I did what I did.. That had to be. You said that I will regret it.. I don't regret shit. If at all I'm happier than ever to be out of it for good. But yes there is that disappointment that things didn't work out. It's too much too late too long. I have suffered severe distress. I have been nice and instead of gratitude I received hate. I am not like other women. But that's completely okay. It's me.

Often times it's the image of a person which is more important and that's what I have realized..