Preety_India

Trigger warning. Spoiler alert - strawberry porn

I'm not close minded at all. I'm against police brutality but you're the one supporting it. I'm against any form of violence and it's perfectly in line with my Green values. Why do you support violence. Self defense is something else.. Being a cop should not be about killing people, rather protecting people even the criminals. Criminals need to be tried and punished in the court, and not given the death penalty on spot.

To all the people who chime in with Sam Harris and talk about logic, rationality and statistics, here's a good riddle for y'all, use your logic now.

You wanna know more about Fox News and their panel of experts. Wanted to share this. Really funny.

@ParanoidAndroid I can't have counter arguments for you. All I'll say is that you're just skimming the surface and that's fine.

I feel very weak right now.

The gist of everything is this ?If you have love in your heart, you will attract love and so you will attract God. If not then you won't. ? I'm a part of you and you're a part of me. This is non duality. When I become a part of you, all judgement stops.

Wherever there is lack of empathy growth stops.

I'm just too self destructive. I really need to work on this.. Because I'm getting tired of myself.. Been through way too much at a young age to feel normal anymore. I wish I wasn't living anymore. But whatever. I'm too done with everything. I want a new life.. A new day. A new way. A new start. I want to be done with parts of my past and present. I want to be done with the status quo.. I just want to be done with everything toxic. Sometimes I just feel like this life is not for me..

That guy Sam gives me a brain aneurysm. He is a massive deception in the garb of spiritual development. I absolutely hate that guy and his views. So myopic and lacking in absolute empathy. He is pure symbolism of western supremacy and Stage Orange garbage and constantly using rationality and reason and all bullshit facts to come up with his weird thought experiments and scenarios that are perfect for his selfish goals. He shouldn't have visited India. He gives Indian spirituality a bad name and is banking on it by marketing his meditation brand to people. Someone should tell him that meditation is not a business. He is not living in the richest neighborhoods for nothing. He has reduced to selling Sam Harris t shirts and mugs at conferences to generate money. I feel pity for those who follow Sam Harris in the name of rationality. Sam Harris is dangerous to humanity, his ideas are. He is a motherload of bad ideas and it's just a fact and it will corrupt the youth.. He is worse than Trump in my opinion, at least Trump signed the police reform executive order and Trump shows some empathy when police brutality happens. Humanity can do way better than all that logic nonsense. He doesn't even know what morality means. For him morality is so cutthroat and he has this horrible mentality of painting an entire race or culture with one brush. He will go down in history as the most myopic person in a modern century. 100 years later people will laugh at whatever he wrote. He is the sanitized version of George Zimmerman with a nice suit and a neuroscientist hat. Ben Affleck was very very right when he said to Sam Harris on the show "dude, you made a career out of Islam." People need to open their eyes to all this YouTube propaganda against race and religion . It's misinformation propaganda machine that he is a part of. Last time he was suffering from Trump Derangement Syndrome TDS on Twitter. After that I never followed his Twitter feed again. It wasn't worth following in the first place. If you really want to follow someone on YouTube, first of all you have Leo Gura who is an excellent example of a very balanced person. And I'll suggest Carl Benjamin aka Sargon of Akkad, he is pretty balanced and not very extremist in his opinions. There is a difference between Sam Harris and Leo. Leo is awake. Sam Harris is not awake. Leo has even opened this politics segment on Actualized.org that didn't exist before because Leo understands the needs of the youth. Lots of young men and women like me and others who have political curiosities which is very healthy. The whole world talks about politics now, not just a group of men with beards. Leo understands the pulse of the youth. He doesn't want the young guys to be brainwashed leaning into mainstream political hogwash. He wants the youth to learn the right way of looking at politics, a holistic approach. This is helpful because if political curiosities of young people like 18 year olds is not addressed here, then they will go to places like Reddit or 4chan or lean into extremist opinions on YouTube. Thus they will get brainwashed by people with agenda and propaganda. Leo doesn't want that In a sense, Leo is doing God's work here. That's why Leo even allows trivial questions on politics from teenagers because he doesn't want to discourage them from thinking or questioning Sam Harris teaches you the lower truths. Leo teaches you the higher truths. It's important to learn the higher truths because we all serve a higher purpose. We are not simply surviving but also living and thriving And thriving needs true love and empathy for all in this world.

The breakdown of a relationship hurts but prolonging a toxic relationship is even worse

I mean what was left of my relationship with Joseph. It was ravaged by all problems and resentment and fallouts.

Sometimes being blunt is better than dealing with all the passive aggression.

June month is my purging month and all of this purging is slowly lifting all the burden.

Me and the likes of me are a forgotten species Because a plain Jane like me is not celebrated anymore. If I had to write a song then these would be my lyrics I'm feeling tired after hours of crying. I need to go back to sleep and forget that the world exists .

Political lobbying and corruption of the elite

This is to Joseph I cry as I write this. I really loved you. It was very hard breaking up with you. I never wanted to start another relationship. I always thought that you were my soulmate. I was extremely heart broken because I loved with all my soul, with all my heart. Yet you wouldn't stop attacking me. It's so hard that it had to end this way. I didn't want to dump you. I wanted our relationship to work. But you wouldn't stop hurting me. You were emotionally abusive. How can you not know that I was also a part of you. You found your way, but what about me? You think that you don't need to care about me but then why expect that something that you decided to throw away should become good again Why do men

You wouldn't say the same thing if you were at the receiving end of the cop's gun. Be careful what you wish for about the police. Don't give any system so much power that taking lives becomes an everyday reality. It might become as normal as sipping coffee at Starbucks. There can be practical ways to arrest people without dead bodies. Wearing bullet protection or bullet proof tactical gear, all over Investing more into the police Extra police officers for resistant and difficult arrests Body cameras banning choke holds, etc. Proper recruiting and training for a year, extensive checks on mental health. Weeding out racism and increased cultural awareness training Not making arrests just for the sake of a promotion or a pat on the back Letting go or arresting later if the suspect does not have a severe criminal record Creating trust with citizens rather than fear and paranoia Not writing up false reports or unnecessary additional charges Disciplinary action when excessive force is used Reasonable actions. No drinking on or off the job. That increases mental incapacity Mental health evaluation each month while on the job Checking background history of suspect before making an arrest Less racial profiling and racial sensitivity rather than focus on stereotype. Policing is not a video game turned into life. It's a serious and responsible duty, a very important job. It should be done properly and reform is absolutely important.

Last night I had a dream. A kinda weird one. I had rape fantasy about Andrew. Andrew just avoiding me at first. In the dream, me and Andrew aren't looking at each other and we still do, just in a way so that the other doesn't catch the one looking. And then he can't resist me anymore. He comes around and he is pissed off. I try not to look at him. And go about my work. Andrew just wants me bad. I know it. But something in me is mysterious. I don't want to feel like I am there. The dream is blurry. It's all messy and I only remember parts of it. And then in the dream, the scene suddenly changes to night. And then Andrew is still there. Looking at me intently. And he proceeds to grab me and gets rough with me. It feels like I'm asking Andrew to dominate me. Just rape me. In the end I am looking at Andrew, he is looking at me. And I wake up.

If anyone has ever taken or tried this plant called Ayahuasca or been to centers around Central, South America, could you describe how your experience was and how the trip felt. I'd love to know since I'm new to it and a bit curious. Would love to know an actual practical experience that someone on this forum had. Also if you had taken this plant, how has the trip changed your perspective towards life and world in general. This has been on my mind for some time so felt to ask here Would be a fascinating discussion. Thanks.

@abrakamowse sure when I get the opportunity to try it again.

@abrakamowse nope

Sometimes I try to create hate just for the sake of creating hate. This is a psychoemotional resistance in me. Maybe the underlying reason is that I suffer from social anxiety. That makes me a bit stressed out when I deal with people. But even when I am not stressed out, my introversion is so deep that it makes me push people away. I don't want to have to deal with something I feel I cannot really connect to. This avoidant behavior is a part of my psychological makeup. But then I also add other things to it. Like wanting the other person to hate me really badly. I pulled this shit on Joseph. And I don't feel guilty about it because If someone is not able to understand me or doesn't want to put the effort into understanding me maybe they should not be a part of me. I don't have an obligation to serve a person who doesn't understand me. This can come off as rebellious or selfish or bratty or entitled but for me it's a survival mechanism. It's how I thrive in a situation. If my survival can't be respected or allowed, then I shouldn't be held to judgement, I shouldn't be contradicted or virtue signaled. Sorry but your virtue signaling doesn't help my survival.. So once I was talking to another guy and he lied to Joseph about me. Some slander. And Joseph took me to task. Joseph started interrogating me. Even slammed his wrist on the kitchen table. He was furious because I wasn't answering and being wishy washy. Then I flew off the handle and said a bunch of insulting things to Joseph, called him a pig and so on. I kept hurting him till he could take no more. My wicked idea behind this was to anger him, anger him some more and make him hate me some more. The underlying reasons behind such behavior are complicated. Of course I didn't want Joseph to hate me. But during his interrogation I was intensely nervous and frustrated stressed out beyond because that day was my father's death anniversary and I was very emotional and I didn't want to be bothered anymore. So I just decided to stop the pain from hurting me more. My defense mechanism was to make Joseph hate me and get the hell out of his place for some quiet and peace. I didn't care what he thought, because it didn't matter anyway, if all he was going to do was yell at me or upset me. There was no point in endlessly defending myself. So I gave up and made it worse.. Whenever I have to defend myself too much, I run into self pity mode and I reach the end of my line. This is where I feel that the only way to survive is to close myself off permanently. And the way to achieve this is to make that person, who is the source of this stress or trauma, hate me more more more. Sometimes there is freedom in hate.

@SirVladimir I already tried Aya six months ago with a friend from Mexico. But hey thanks.