tsuki

@mandyjw Whatever that means, I will take it as a compliment.

Interesting. What is your relationship with women in general? Are you also suicidal?

If hypergamy is something he wants deep down, then it's not like I'm going to talk him out of it. In a sense, there is only one way to live life. That way is called here/now.

Synchronicities are moments that reveal the true, empty, nature of the mind. It is when the small self and the big self connect, when your thoughts become indistinguishable from events of the real world. Did you attract me by creating them? This question arises because of inconsistency. Mystical experiences show the point of view of the big self and there is no difference between us, physically. It's like looking at two hands clapping from the point of view of the mind and asking whether one attracted the other. Was it just a deception? JUST?! The Ego may create the inner world through lies, but so does God create the external. In fact, the Ego is identical with God and that is the lesson of the Law of Attraction. LOA is Ego/God praying to itself! The insights were world-shattering because they did, in fact, shatter your world. They were the sounds of a dying mind, the sounds of silence. The path is not about depth. When you press the mind hard enough, it will give you everything, including occult powers, clairvoyance, omniscience and so forth. They will not bring lasting peace regardless of the fireworks. It does not matter whether you do this for your own benefit, or for the benefit of others. I/other is the root fixation of the mind, the fulcrum point that lets it spin the meaning and run the show. Release the 'I' through purification (shadow work, meditation, contemplation, self-inquiry, etc) and the mind will cease. There will be thoughts and maybe even occult powers, but there will be no thinker and no mind. Psychedelics have healing powers. My one LSD trip was an intense, 12-hours release of trauma. Ramana Maharshi taught that realization is accomplished through Grace. This is confirmed by my path. My guru was reality itself, I contemplated it until I became nothing - out of pure curiosity and desire for truth. A guru is something, or someone, that you find magnetic, but instead of being pulled towards it - you are being pulled towards yourself, your own being. Devotion is a very powerful tool of releasing individuality, but I don't think we Westerners are open enough to accept that kind of madness. Yogis devised deities such as Shiva, Kali, etc as object of worship so that people could surrender without guidance of another human (guru). Grace is when you humble yourself down to nothingness and God becomes everything. Then, your deity may let you see yourself as it. You are a Christian. Go meet God in person.

I find it to be extremely beta to hinge your happiness on such fickle matters as sex. A true alpha would be able to sit on his ass for 8 hours straight, not move, not think, and be peacefully happy.

@themovement What have you learned?

After the initial awakening of 560s the work is about purification from the position of no-self. In order to purify, you need to bring it out and scrutinize it. The self-centeredness is not attributable to the awakened one when the realization of the no-self is genuine. It's a form of accumulated psychological and physiological trauma that needs to be released. That is what was happening in your journals. You needed an ear that would listen and the amount of synchronicities confirm just how much. It is not possible to go any further by 'accepting' the self-centeredness. Self-centeredness is the root of suffering and you need to be willing to stop. The only way forward is by letting go of things you hold dear and fight for. That includes both things you fight for your own benefit, as well as things you do for the world. There is a small self and the big self and they both need to go. That is the only thing that makes the pendulum stop.

Because in your experience good has an opposite (selflessness vs self-centeredness). You need to go all the way in and surrender your humility. The book is very vague towards the end. It would probably put me in the 900-1000 range. The grand finale is the stateless state and I resonate with that a lot. There was no path to begin with.

You are abiding in the 800s, in the state of not-knowing. It is not a not-knowing of ignorance, of false humility. It is a not-knowing of directionlessness, of validity of both ends. It is a union through paradox. The path starts in 590s with a negation of the self, but ends in a final, groundless, affirmation. A positive answer at 1000. There is no need to shy away from choosing either end of the paradox, because even this total paradox is surrendered. Your attainment is genuine and remarkable precisely because it doesn't make you feel proud. A paradox is a sign of incompleteness, of overlooked assumptions. The book may help you find them. If you find the author's experience confusing - skip it. The content of mystical experiences is individual and expressing them (like the author did) is what is used to self-reflect. It is a mirror that helps you see your self that is overlooked. Good luck @mandyjw.

It is as real as everything else. Study psychology and see for yourself. I prefer Jungian psychology because it does not treat the subconscious as a separate entity and gives you tools to deal with it (shadow work, as linked by @Truth Addict).

Whose mind?

Alrighty, what are you? Are you? Are you not? What is the world? Is there a world? Is the world not there (or here)? What is knowledge? What is God?

What do you mean by 'real'?

Hmm, can you avoid learning things? No reason can be attributed to unity that can explain its fall to multiplicity. And what perspective is that, exactly?

The article went over my head, I'm preoccupied with Meditations for now. I find it charming that Tomberg seems to argue in favor of Christian yoga over Advaitan non-duality. I need to re-read the second chapter (The High Priestess) because his arguments seem to me like petty squabble and I can't accept that.

Both books are superb. It seems like 1000 is challenging to you emotionally, while I find Meditations to be difficult intellectually.

All theories are built from the fundamental duality of yin and yang. They are comprised of visible, inert, passive 'things' and hidden, active, alive 'interactions'. Dimensions are the fundamental 'trick' that lets us think of yang in terms of yin - it is a quantitative measure of freedom that the theory accounts for. The more dimensions a theory has, the more expressive it is: interactions (yang) can unite the various kinds of 'things' (yin) into a tangible, unified, system. Dimensions themselves, however, are neither yin, nor yang - they are a mirror that lets us see one in the other. They are what informs our notions of possibility and designate the extents of paradox and ambiguity. A theory beyond its application is like looking at a projection of a cube to a plane and arguing whether it's viewed from 'up' or 'down': The connection between God and dimensions is such that it can be viewed as Nothingness and Absolute Infinity. Nothingness is the divine Yin, zero dimensions, where everything is explained because nothing makes sense. Absolute infinity is the divine Yang, infinite dimensions, the God of Love and ultimate freedom of creation. The former is stillness surrendered-to, while the latter is genius possessed-by. Of course, they are symmetric in the sense that it takes a genius to be still because reality abhors vacuum, and it takes stillness for a genius to express his/her inspiration. So, humans are meso-dimensional because we choose the theories based on their dimensionality, and we're meta-dimensional because we create theories to fit the dimensions of any given problem. Both of are divine, as they require from us a choice in directionless conditions - to unwrap the unknown into knowledge and wrap it back to unity.

From Meditations on the Tarot

Yes, the feedback is a mystical experience. The point however is to not cling to it, not making it into an 'achievement'.

Yes it does. Worship is a very powerful method of releasing individuality, but at the same time it's also very prone to misunderstanding because of its simplicity. Today's culture makes it difficult to have a personal relationship with God, so there is no feedback from this method. To become self-realized through it, it requires immense surrender followed by Grace given by God itself. I don't picture that happening too often in the West because of our materialistic/scientific disposition. What we could use though, is a prophet of science that would express God in terms of technology. Maybe, with more man-machine integration and artificial intelligence, being a man of God would be feasible again? Hmmm....

@Zigzag Idiot Thank you! ❤️

I've been reading Meditations on Tarot, and I stumbled across an important distinction. Hermeticism deals with multiplicity of the world by using its underlying unity in the unknown. This multiplicity, knowledge, is two-dimensional. One dimension is time (past-now-future), the other is space (below-here-above). The author of the book makes a distinction between these two dimensions and classifies spiritual technology (that, which makes one arrive at unity) into two categories: mythology and typology. Mythology are universals that show the multiplicity relating to time as inherently unified, while typology shows the apparent multiplicity of 'things' as unified between levels of abstraction (subtlety). The example of a Mythology would be Hero's journey, while an example of Typology would be Enneagram of personality, MBTI, or endocrinal type. I'm still quite baffled by the Enneagram itself, as it seems to be a map of maps, something that can be used to express both typologies and mythologies.

So, for the past few weeks nothing happened. I kept the momentum of my everyday life at peace. The dust after my recent happening is settling down and I'm resting in the state of no-mind. It's still difficult in the morning after the night's sleep, but noticing the struggle to be struggle-free seems to end it. My nights are usually peaceful and dreamless. I am aware of that I am sleeping and the constant thought creation and annihilation seems to carry on into the night. The thoughts that occur in this space are often profound insights about love, truth and beauty, but I'm unable/not interested in retaining them in the morning. There are a lot of synchronicities happening there, but they are expressed in terms of things that happen during the night, like my wife squirming in bed. I noticed that I've been asking myself "what now?" often, and the only satisfying answer that comes up is simply: 'now'. What now? Now. If I were to say what the world needs the most right now is to simply need less. The only worthwhile contribution that I can make is to teach, by example, how to be free of desires and offer guidance to people in need. However, teaching is not a desire of my own, so I will not venture out on a quest. Making myself publicly available is the only thing I'm going to do. I found a meditation group in my city and I'm planning on going there few times a week. It's equally an opportunity to help others that seek help, as it is an opening for them to show me my place. Both are fine with me. Now that I'm a steady state of surrender, I no longer need to be 'on my own', without a teacher. I started reading a lot. In the past few weeks I finished the Kybalion and started reading God is Nothingness, but lost interest halfway through the latter. The book is great, especially for those mistaking Nothingness with nihilism (@mandyjw) but did not offer much value to me. I bought myself Kindle Oasis to fuel my passion for reading and ended up short on money this month. Thankfully, Amazon lets download previews of books, so I can keep my space from the black hole of youtube cat meme videos. Talks with Sri Ramana Maharshi are giving me a lot of insight into the process of self-realization and the nature of various practices that I've done. Maharshi is very intelligent and somewhat cheeky, so reading it is entertaining. I'm Just getting started with Meditations on Tarot, but I can already tell that this book is very profound. I may start to study Christianity more deeply because it's very popular where I live and I need a common ground to work from, if I want to help people. When I was reading Ramaji's 1000 I stumbled across the fragment about Lama Tsultrim Allione and immediately resonated with her. Her books have been translated to Polish and I was hoping to find Feeding your demons, but it has been sold out. I bought Women of wisdom instead and gave it to my wife to inspire her. The results are mixed because she's interested, but it's tearing through her trauma a lot. I also bought her Loving what is by Byron Katie and she seems to be much more into this one. I find it a little flattering that she finds mine and Katie's teachings regarding the heartmind similar. In the future, I will probably study the practices of Kriya Yoga from the book list. Unfortunately, the most important book is not sold as an e-book, so I will have to order a physical copy.