tsuki

You can stop yourself from eating shit once you catch yourself doing it. Effortlessly. Once nothing is meaningful, eating healthy is meaningless as well.

Oooh, I know that. It's like a weight of your life was lifted off your shoulders. Beautiful, isn't it? So you're saying that it's gone?

Did you share it on the forum? How was it like?

@Saumaya Tell me one more thing: how did you come to terms with you being "it"? I don't know your background, it may very well be the case that you sought it for your whole life and it was a great relief. After being deceived for so many years by yourself, aren't you weary of possibility of losing your insight and going to sleep again?

@Saumaya Oh, I see. You can put like that.

Can you elaborate on existential suffering? What do you mean?

This is what happened to me as well. Fist was the self, then there was the other, and then they started to merge which was a hit in itself. Once they merged over a few months, it hit me again. Thanks!

Is the order of these experiences important in your understanding? Or you simply experienced them in this order?

@Joseph Maynor I think that is it a very important observation that everybody seems to know what is true, but nobody seems to agree on what is truth. To ask what is truth is to ask "What is true about truth?" and then to try and find a single answer, which would be true, of course! This self-referential question "what is truth?" is the very essence of the mind that got here in the first place. It constructs reality by transcending it - by finding meaning where is none. It creates meaning out of thin air by making observable, direct phenomena something that they are not. It makes the monitor a forum, a keyboard mouth and a "moving image of the mind" a memory. This meaning-making machine is not lying, per se. What the mind has constructed may become false only by the very mechanism of transcendence, of changing meaning. Whatever you see and "understand" is true and very moment that it changes meaning you declare your past experience as "false". In short: "Truth is whatever stops you from seeking". Is that sentence true? Does it stop you from seeking? You can always ask more questions, do you?

Welcome home @Patang. The cycle has completed itself! You can see it! Congratulations!

@Saumaya Haha! What does it even mean to be near enlightenment? #TooMysticalIndeed @Shin Certainly! Know thyself!

@Saumaya I'm not really sure about that. There seems to be a speed-up once you are getting close to awakening, but there is no way to tell the reason for this. There is a shift in perceiving time once awake, so your speeding up may be just a perception. You may have gotten to the "right" path to you that led you there faster. There may have never been a path and it always played itself out by itself and you simply became aware of it. There are millions of reasons for any of the above statement and once you realize that everything is relative - you are not so confident in making such claims. There are no key points to led you to the place you are. There are only events that you can backwards-rationalize to produce any story that seems fit. It doesn't make the story false, mind you. It's a decision to be made once you are aware of it. This reasoning is circular. There is no logical way out of it. There are no rights and wrongs in this discussion.

@SOUL, @Faceless Your discussion can be summed up like this: In order to choose the path to enlightenment, you need a set of criteria to discard invalid paths. Criteria are up for choosing. What are criteria to discard invalid criteria?

@Nahm I've gotten ahead of myself. I was seeing my own story. Instead of loving myself I decided to push myself away. It was a mistake. @Scholar You are going in the right direction. Keep digging, and you will become it. You may be interested in my story even if it's quite lengthy. Here's the link, you may relate to it:

@Scholar Aren't you seeing yourself in the text? Didn't it ever surprise you that a text is ambiguous and people will argue about it? When I say "truth", how do you know what I mean? By asking questions, you don't question the words you use to ask them. Truth is whatever stops you from seeking.

@Scholar Let me ask you: where does truth come from?

At this point all I have to say is this: applying logic is illogical. Logic cannot prove its own method. You apply logic and get results. You treat results as reality. By treating them as such, you create it. There is no difference between you being in control by understanding things and things playing themselves and you narrating a story afterwards. The answer to your enlightenment lies in the answer to the question: where is logic grounded? Once you answer this question sincerely and see what changes in the world, you may become enlightened.

@Scholar Logic is a feeling that A follows B. How is it logical that A follows B? When you see the two above sentences, how do you know that they correlate? Logic is an illusion. It's groundless.

@Scholar Consciousness is unconscious from a different perspective. When you move your hand, does your conscious process make the hand move? Does it move your muscles? Try first moving your hand, and try to move your hand by moving the muscles themselves to mimic the other. Can you? How do you know that you consciousness is the one moving your hand, and not narrating your thoughts, as the hand moves by itself?

See this: logical process itself is illogical. Why is there logic at all? 1) Mary ran over a cat. 2) The cat died. Where is the logical connection that points 1 -> 2? It's a feeling. It's illogical!

Thoughts think themselves. There is no reality, there is only you. What is the difference between you not understanding reality and reality playing itself out as you? You have control if you understand. If you don't - the thing plays itself.

@Scholar What I claim is that your whole life, every single story that you have about yourself is such a paradox. The only thing that prevents you from seeing it is the size of the circular reasoning applied. Every thought is a loop. A paradox.

You are almost seeing it, I can tell. Are you seeing how this thing spins itself trying to produce a result that disproves itself? This is the paradox of reality. This is why you see yourself as you stare at the text I'm writing. There is one difference between someone insane and extremely intelligent. The answer is: you. What is the difference between not understanding somebody because you're too stupid and him being incomprehensible lunatic? The answer is: you. Is someone saying something to you, or are you producing the meaning out of thin air?

@ScholarYou are getting at something important. This circular reasoning is not present only here, but in every other assumption-conclusion, cause-effect reasoning. Every conclusion you make have an assumption. Where did it come from? From the notion of something else being true. Things are true only by the virtue of a "gut" feeling. Your reason tells you that they are. Why do you trust your reason? Is it because it is reasonable? Have you ever tried to assume a paradox and come to a conclusion? Once you try, you get so-called "false" ideas about reality, but that's only true because you assume that you can't assume paradox. Reason has its limits. You are approaching them. Keep going and you will become enlightened.

It's like writing an SMS to your loved one trying to tell her to "enjoy life" and the auto-correct changes that to "I'm enjoying life" and realizing that you are giving the advice to yourself. That correcting it back would spoil the whole thing and you let it go, sending it. And then, she replies: "I'm enjoying my life too!". constant death awareness is seeing your own, so called, wisdom turning on itself, showing you your own ignorance.