tsuki

Fundamentals sound more like axioms upon which you build a theory. Principles sound more applicable, flexible, practical. More like rule of thumb.

@Nathan leigh Why don't you try to mix and match various teachings and see what works best for you? Spirituality without application in everyday life gets dry very quickly.

How does the dynamic of your childhood look from this perspective?

Does the lack of free will free you, or imprison you? Can you blame and hold responsible if there is no free will? Can you be a hero if there is no free will?

Nah-ah. Don't blame sweetheart. Don't blame him and don't blame yourself. To prevent re-occurrence of your childhood in another setting is a reaction to your shadow. Do you believe in free will? How does free will play into blame and guilt?

Why do you feel responsible for your father's actions? Why is it your responsibility to grow him? Would you, personally, benefit from the change you want to introduce to your father?

Still, you sound troubled. You doubt whether you should let them go, or not. What stops you? What seems wrong about doing that?

It depends on what do you mean by 'leaving them behind'. If you try to simply bury your childhood without reconciling the feelings of hurt, it will give birth to shadows. What was crucial in my development is understanding how this whole dynamic played itself out impersonally. That each and every actor (including me) was reacting to their own feelings of hurt and dealt with them inappropriately. This way you can own the responsibility of this situation and stand on equal footing with your parents without demonizing anybody. From what I understand from your post (and please correct me if I'm wrong), you still feel very hurt and put whole responsibility on your parents. I don't think that it is a good place to free yourself from your past.

@Key Elements Beautiful. That is how you spell silence.

Integral Zen.

@Scholar I would try to point towards the fact that the recognition of truth of a rational statement is not a rational statement. When one hears a rational statement and evaluates it - its truthfulness is a feeling and it is non-discursive. Post-rationality starts with integration of feeling with thinking and mapping their interrelationship.

Profound insights from an existential philosopher Martin Heidegger. I will not fail to mention that he joined the Nazi party later in his life .

From my experience, ego takes hold of reality through two mechanics of thought: Time / not now Space / not here These two dimensions are subject to projection. Projection is based on preference. A sensation that arises is judged and reaction is formed. Projection through time creates past/future. Projection through space creates this/that. Projections through time create reactive thoughts that explore imaginary scenarios. Past scenarios are called memory. Future scenarios are called possibility. Sensations that occur are deemed positive/negative and are enjoyed/resisted. Enjoyment of sensations creates desire. Resistance creates suffering. Desire and suffering are imaginary. They are a loop between past and future in avoidance of the present moment. Projections through space create finite entities that are deemed to exist. Imaginary scenarios are comprised of such entities and their relationships.

What I read in your post is that you feel guilty for not adhering to a specific, self-imposed, schedule of practices. I treat techniques as lessons to learn. I learn them by merging, integrating, what I do in formal sitting with my ordinary (organic) way of being. You don't have to sit and still your mind at one particular point during the day. You can meditate and walk, you can even meditate and sleep. This applies to do-nothing, self-inquiry, mindfulness, 3-centered awareness, and even yoga. Which realization? The one about the underlying scarcity mindset/hole? It's a gateway to spirituality, enlightenment work. Egoic mechanism and duality are the root cause of that.

That's very powerful. I'm so happy that you want to confront the hole. When it comes to practices, I tend to treat them as lessons to learn about my everyday consciousness. There is always an insight within a technique that I can merge with my ordinary way of being. This is why I'm not concerned with formality too much.

I don't feel the same way as before. Don't burden yourself by claiming that you (or I) caused this experience. My energy runs amok from all the identity that I released in the process, that's why I need space. I need the dust to settle until I can dance with you again effortlessly.

Hey, I don't want that! You wouldn't either! I'm still integrating. That is what I call weaponization of ambiguity. You hide in symbols. Your anja is working in reverse. It should read and not write them.

@now is forever Obsession is choice. It does not mean that you choose to obsess over something. It means that you choose to not obsess over it. You are drawn to it, attracted, but you don't want to. You resist what you get. That is obsession. By trying to get away, you stir your mind more into thinking about it. You crave it more by deprivation and you finally give in when you feel starved. You still engage on the forum, but now you have guilt. "I promised to not come here!" "I spend too much time here!" "How much is too much?" etc. I think it is much better to introspect into why you are attracted to this place at all. Is it about what Mandy said about me and you?

There is no me, sweetheart.

@mandyjw OH MY GOD THAT IS SO BEAUTIFUL. The watery "I love you guys" at the end was powerful.

When I am talking about chakras and kundalini, I refer to the substance of emotions. Kundalini can be usually experienced with inner movements of the body that are flavored by the mind. Flavors of these movements are what we call emotions. Emotions are distinct from raw energy/kundalini through ego. Egoic interference shows itself by conflating these movements with "external" events. This is when the illusion of control takes hold and we project current circumstances towards future or from the past. Chakras are energetic centers around which kundalini can be focused. There are 7 such centers and they are spread across the spine from the base to the top of the head. Energy can be focused willingly and their experience can be recognized when emotions arise spontaneously: Muladhara is located between the genitals and the anus . It s the 'DO' energy. When hijacked by the ego, it manifests as anger. When the body is energized for action, this energy is used to justify the mind's subversive attitude. Svadhisthana is located between the tailbone and the navel. It is satisfaction. When hijacked by the ego, it manifests as fear. Projection through time and space makes us conflate this feeling with objects or people. It makes us dependent and defensive. Manipura is located in the solar plexus. Its energy is FLOW. When hijacked by the ego, it manifests as doubt, directionlessness. Prior to awakening, this is the prime driving force of the mind. The greatest component of time. Post awakening, flow feels thick as jelly. Anahata is located in the heart. It's energy is softness, vulnerability. When hijacked by the ego, it manifests as infatuation, or hurt. The feeling of this energy is overwhelming, like when you cry. It tightens the chest, radiates towards the throat and disrupts breathing. It is very easy for me to confuse this energy and project it towards people or situations. Vishuddha is located in the throat. Its energy is silence, clarity. When hijacked by the ego, it manifests as chatter. Ajna is located on the forehead. Its energy is vision. When hijacked by the ego, it becomes imagination. The loop between Vishuddha, Manipura and Ajna is the driving force of the Ego in intellectuals. Sahasrara is located at the top of the head. Its energy is oneness. When hijacked by the Ego, it becomes separation.