WaveInTheOcean

And yet, there exists only True God Consciousness. Even Trump's present subjective experience -- whatever he is doing right now, shitting or writing a Tweet -- is True God Consciousness. A new paradox to ponder, or not. Every experience is God's experience. Yet, some of God's experiences are more aligned with God's "true nature" than others:-)

Never thought of that analogy, but now that you do, I must say I sort of do:)

The problem with questions like this -- although I like the question -- is that no matter what answer I give, it will not be the Absolute Truth and therefore it will not satistify you. Yes, you are the Self (/God/Consciousness/Etc.) imagning your own ego and all other egoes and the world. Not only are you imagning it, you are also the substance of that/your imagination. You are the creater, the knower, the substance of all experience. You are One as the Self. Nothing is outside You. Anyway. Yes, from the PoV of an ego other egoes have their own separate thought processes. From the PoV of the Self/God, it is all ONE though - no separation. See, I am back into WaveInTheOcean-consciousness-mode now. I am not bathing in God-consciousness as I were during the peak of my last 2C-B-trip. So naturally I cannot --- as God, cos I'm always God, even though my true God-Consciousness is currently slightly veiled because I'm alive and living as a human being/I'm in human form -- have access to other people's PoV in my current consciousness. It's possible that the more enligthened/selfless you become, the more you will in some limited form have access to so called super-natural abilities such as mind-reading etc. I'm not there yet, even though I would say I'm pretty good at reading people none-the-less=) There are some naive dudes who will claim that actual enligthenment is a permanent state of Absolute God-Consciousness. However it is retarded -- sorry to use that word, but it is -- to believe in this, because Absolute God-Consciousness is only possible through temporary peak mystical experiences or actual physical biological death (these two things are the same, experience-wise). It is retarded, namely, because if you were to find a person who's in Absolute God-Consciousness 24/7, that would then for example imply that - that person litterally could roll a dice and say what it would be, before you opened the cup, every single time - that person litterally could mind-read other people's minds to exact precision, every single time and many other things that are not fully possible within the dualistic laws of living human life. Laws that You created, of course. Make no mistake. Also make no mistake, I'm open to the possibility that some people are so enlightened -- Jesus, Buddha, Ramana Maharshi etc -- that they almost can do these things I just said are not _fully_ possible :-) Full enlightenment is the opposite of Life: Death. All living human people can "only" approach Full Enlightenment in human form. We can never get there 100%. Yet I'd still say I'm "fully" enlightened in the sense that I am now completely aware of the fact that I'm God in all my experiences, and that all I experience is me (God). I know that. I'm aware of that. But I'm not claiming I'm in God Consciousness 24/7. I am not. None are. Don't be fooled. People who believe enlightenment equals a state of Absolute God-Consciousness 24/7 are people who have not (yet) tried to actually bathe in Absolute God-Consciousness. Simple as that :-) ------------------------- Anyway. Yes there is only one Now. And it is Yours/God's/The Self's . Yes, indeed. Time is an illusion - but see, so is everything that is "distinct": anything you can find in maya/life/mind is an illusion. There exist no things. Only the Now/God's Happening is real. And see, within "The Infinite Happening of God"/"The Now" there exists illusions such as separate minds/egos, and time and trees and cars. There do. They are just not real in the Absolute Sense. Nothing is real in the Absolute Sense, except God of course! " Other POVs with other NOWs implies objective reality, since they exist outside of this present moment this ego (my ego) experiences but since everything exists as a probability how is it possible? " You are being confused. You are confusing things. And of course you are! How could you not confuse things? All non-enlightened beings will make confusions when discussing the Absolute/God. I did so too before my 2CB-trip two days ago. Contemplating/reading/listening to gurus can only take you so far. The limits of language. The laws of duality prevents you from getting it fully, until you let go and fully absorb God's gift (that is: your own gift) of removing the veiled glasses (= ego, mind) and thus DIRECTLY EXPERIENCE YourSelf/God. Objective reality / subjective reality is a dualism that ultimately must collapse like all other dualisms. To be arrogant, this is even an easy one;) Reality is subjective-objective There is only one Now. Nothing and everything exists outside your present moment. That is a paradox. But both perspectives are true. That nothing outside your present moment exists (the Now is the Truth) is true. That everything exists outside your present moment (reality is Absolute Infinite) is also true. HOW CAN THAT BE? Answer: God. God loves paradoxes. See: In order for you to not see your true nature, there has to paradox embedded into your existence/present experience. Your ego experiences nothing. Your ego doesn't exist, so it naturally cannot experience anything. There is only one thing in reality that can experience 'stuff'. That One Thing = Consciousness You = The Fabric And Structure of Reality Itself = The Self = God! End of discussion. ---------------------- I stumbled upon this: Leo's most profound talk in a way. Let's get that bread.

nice

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤❤ ❤ ❤ Ego and God is One, absolutely speaking . Jesus was also an ego. Buddha was an ego. The difference between you and Jesus -for example- was that the ego of Jesus was nearly perfectly aligned with the true nature of God, while your ego still lacks behind a tiny bit ❤ ❤ ❤ I project as I want. I don't care of your opinion of me. I'm arrogant when I want to be arrogant, when I feel it serves a purpose. I may be wrong at times, but I don't care. The path of least resistance is my path now. I love you ❤ ❤ ❤

❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ Niels Bohr is great man. I'm Danish so I know quite a lot about him. Wise motherfucker he was for sure.

<3 There are many depths to awakening. I have had God-realization on Ayahuasca before. This 2CB-trip is the final nail in the coffin though. I've never felt the realization so deeply integrated as I do right now, writing these words. In another way it's not the final nail though, I'm very aware of that. There will be more deepening. New insights. No doubt. more facets to it. 1. As God you are the only one actually existing. God = Existence = You = Me = The Self = Consciousness = Love. Nothing is outside you. You are absolutely Infinite in every infinite way. This is why you feel you are the only current incarnation of Consciousness. Cos in one way that's true. The mistake you unconsciously make is that you confuse "God" and "ego/yourself as a person" . Of course from a Absolute/God-perspective God and ego is One. However, relatively speaking --- and we do have to speak in relative terms, cos we're using language, we're in human form, you and I, and thus we are bound by the laws of duality, which we ourselves as God created in order to imagine ourselves as not-God --- ego and God complete opposites! You, as billiesimon, is an imaginary mind/ego/body/person. Just like all other persons are imaginary. Who is imagining them? You! God! You - as God - constructed it in a such special way that you only have direct access to one persons inner thoughts one at a time. You can't have inner without outer. Mental without physical. Good without bad. god/love without ego/evil. (Love and God with a capital L/G is a non-dual truth though). There are infinite perspectives my friend! Infinite! And they are legitimate in their own right. However, some perspectives are more aligned with truth, more aligned with God/Love. Follow that perspective and Goodness will come to you <3 But see: In order to know that one perspective is more God-like/True/Love you also have to be aware of other perspectives that aren't. You can't have tails without heads. Yet all the infinite perspectives are also in one way just ONE perspective: YOURS! GOD's! haha <3 If your point of view is the point of view of your True Self/God then, yes, you are imagining all of reality. If your point of view is the point of your egoic self, your self-image/persona, then you are caught in illusion. God caught in his own illusion <3 Why does God want to get caught in his own illusion? Fun! Love! Exictement! To test how loving she can be! Human life is a love-simulator. How loving can you be? When God finally gets back to himself it's an explosion of love and joy. The more twisted and far out God got in his stage play, the more amazing it is when the play finally ends. <3 <3 <3 -------------------------------- A side note about meditation: I think when you're really enlightened, you don't really have to meditate so much to ground yourself. For me 5 minutes will probably be enough to ground myself. Cos in these 5 minutes I can quckly enter into a no-thoughts-high-consciousness-state, where as for people with lots of ego-baggage left in the sink it can take them hours to get there, if they ever manage to. So meditating for long time (30 min+) sure has its purpose, but mostly for people who has a long way to go, still. However for me, meditating for a long time can still be nice. Just for the enjoyment of it. Like watching a good movie. Bliss. Love. God. Self. -------------------------------------------- "2. For some weird reason I have reached this first awakening even though I still have some self esteem issues and some negativity left. I practice meditation, breathing and shadow work everyday. The awakening felt totally loving and like I was worthy of all of existence. Why is it that now I'm feeling somehow depressed and having this victim-like ego backlash? Shouldn't I be empowered by this experience? " Good. Keep it up with those practices. Healing is important. Very fucking important. Shadow work is fucking important. I know all about self esteem issues and negativity. I have been there. Heal yourself. Whatever it takes. Be kind and gentle but don't be afraid to go into your deepest caves and see what hides. It will terrify you, but it will heal you also. I'm grateful for you that you've had a micro-awakening and that it felt loving. Of course it felt loving! <3 Ego-backlash and depression is SO FUCKING natural after the first minor awakenings. I've been there, my friend. Hell, I've been there man. I'm almost crying now, thinking about it. I think there is a very logical reason behind ego-backlash and post-awakening-depression. It happens when your ego is not attuned enough to integrate God. That's the short and simple answer. But keep going. Slowly, if you continue this work, your ego will become more attuned and you'll get there! <3 I love you. Remember to not use this forum too much. This forum can EASILY become a distraction. It has its purpose though. Go out in live, and live and learn. That's one of the most spiritual things you can do. Sure, keep meditating, keep reflecting over life, stay conscious. But fucking live man. Live and learn! <3 Haha my man. It's so freaking obvious to me that even though you consciously see yourself as a spiritual dude/non-materalist, you are unconsciously still very much materalistic. Your bashing of pyschedelics as just "chemicals" clearly reflects that. Much love to you brother, you'll get there, no doubt.

<3 Jon Hopkins is seriously a next level genius in regards to music <3 So much depth, emotion, melancholy and cosmic transendence in many of his tracks. <3 Another great is Four Tet. You don't have to do anything in the grand scheme of things. That's perhaps the horrifying part of this deep God-realization. I see clearly how I actually don't have to do anything, litteraly. I can decide freely what to do, and in the "Absolute End" it doesn't matter what I do. Yet I also saw that God's plan was/is to make me a spiritual vessel that can help people in various ways -- mental issues, waking up. And I thus naturally -- I am God, I know that -- want to help people through psychedelic therapy/psychedelic enlightenment-work. Psychedelics have destroyed me - my stage Orange belief-systems that is. And then I have been reborn through them. Deep healing. First LSD trip 5 years ago initiated stage Green. I integrated all of green. DMT/Ayahuasca/2CB the last year helped me go to stage yellow, which I'd say fully integrated around 1-2 months ago. This 2CB-trip has initiated stage Turquoise for me. In some ways the real fun for me in my life starts now. I see that. My point of all my rambling is that I have extreme respect for the violent and powerful nature of psychedelics. They are dangerous in the wrong hands. On the other hand they have the potential to heal and evolve human consciousness. That's my life purpose; to help make that come true. Psychedelic experiences have shaped me, healed me, and now made me very, very conscious of the fact that I'm God, and that everything is me/God (Oneness). I have woken up. Anyway, you can help people in infinite indirect ways. Art is one way. Even something as "low-conscious" as sports can help people. Everything serves a purpose. Follow your intutition. There are many people with high levels of consciousness who don't go around saying "Hey, I'm God, you're God, everything is God" and yet they are still very enlightened beings in some ways. Just take this muscian, Jon Hopkins. I'm just fucking amazed by his music. We don't call Jon Hopkins a guru. Yet I'd say in one way he is one of my biggest gurus :-) Fuck, even somewhat mediocre-conscious people like my parents - they are also my gurus. Everything is put into your life for a reason. You did it. You created it all. You did it all. Everything that happens in your life is YOUR/GOD's intelligent design. It's so fucking beautiful when you realize that. ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤ Yes I do. To summarize how I feel this morning: Grounded as fuck. Light in mind and body as fuck. Very, very sensitive to everything around me - in a beautiful, grounded way. Just listening to a few minutes of this talk - that Leo put up on his blog - - made me cry a bit. Obviously, I'm not in the same "God-consciousness-state" as I was on the peak of my 2CB-trip yesterday night. However, I deeply know that I'm still God. I just know. In that sense enlightenment is not a state. Peter Ralston is right in a sense: it's not a state, enligthenment. It's just a flipping 360 degrees of everything in the way you look at things. In your awareness. The mirror has been turned 180 degrees during the peak experience (yesterday) and now it has turned 180 degrees more and we're back at WaveInTheOcean-consciousness. Full circle. Yet, now I'm complete. I know I'm God and that all is God. It's so beautiful. Fuck, enligthenment/awakening is SO FUCKING OBVIOUS. How could it be ANY other way? How could it? Of course there is only one Self - YOU! Me! God! How could it be any other way? Hahahhahahhaha fuck man. It's so, so , so , so , so obvious that we all miss it. haha >.< Of course I still felt tired when I woke up. I still have "negative" feelings such as being tired and so on. Enlightenment doesn't change the content of your perception. It just changes the way you look at it. At everything. So to look at enlightenment as some sort of a "state" where you don't need to sleep, don't need to eat, don't "need" anything, where you can't feel pain: That's a naive and immature way of looking at it and reflects lack of actual insight. "since you are fully awakened I suppose you would be able to sit down and be alone with “yourself “ / meditate for 10 hours straight? Or at least 3-5 hours ? Am I mistaken to believe that is something an enlightened person could easily do?" Look, I can do anything. Litterally. I can fly. I'm all the birds. I'm already flying. I'm already you. To be a bit more serious -- relatively speaking - the maxmium amount of time I have consciously forced myself to sit down and meditate is 1 hour. I have no doubt that I could pretty easily meditate for "infinite" amount of hours in a row (still getting some sleep, food and so on), but what is the point of that? Meditation as a practice is a technology. An art-form. A way to ground yourself and widen your conscious (both things). However, in another way, you could say meditation is what I'm now doing 24/7. I'm meditating as I write these words. It comes so naturally. That's another thing I have realized this morning. As I said I just feel so light. Everything I do , I just do. No resistance. It's almost like I'm not doing any of it. An enlightened human being can do anything. That's the short answer. And it's scary to be so free. But also beautiful. My call in this life of WaveInTheOcean is to help other people. Do I help other people -- /reach that goal -- by meditating in a cave 365 days a year? Hell fucking no. Will some light daily meditation of 10-30 minutes a day help me in my goal? Hell yes. It will help ground me. After I was finished writing yesterday night here I walked outside in the beautiful early morning night and sat at a bench by a lake, smoked a cigarette and meditated for 20 minutes. These 20 minutes really felt short. Then I walked inside and slept. When you have an ego that's not really spiritually developed/mature, I think ego-death really feels profound/scary/intense. When your ego is very developed spiritually, ego-death is just so natural. I meditated for 20 minutes, and for most of these 20 minutes there were no thoughts. Yet it wasn't very intense. It was just bliss and calm. Grounded me. And I feel it's VERY important for me to stay grounded. Cos I'm naturally a person that gets really excited about the stuff I do. Now I have just become enlightened and there are impulses in me that just want to follow fucking through and go crazy/leave this planet/plane of existence. But I won't do that, no worries, I will remain grounded. <3 Yes, you are very right. I can do that, no problem. That's how it is now. No resistance. No suffering. Sure I could still feel pain if a girl rejected me -- cos that's how my body-mind is wired -- but I wouldn't resist it and naturally, easily get over it. Why would I? I'm fucking God. The girl rejecting me is me rejecting myself! It's all my doing. One of the most profound talks ever: My parents aren't that bad. So that would be super easy:) Even if my parents were bad, it wouldn't be a problem. Sure that would be negative feelings arising in me, but I wouldn't resist them. Why would I ? ;-) Haha. Love your ego. Yes, it is your ego. But that's natural. The ego wants to survive. Everyone on this forum are ego's searching for enligthenment/awakening. And naturally when someone makes a bold post "I'm enligthened - AMA" other egoes easily gets hurt and rejects/resist what the dude writes. I've been there myself. I've been on this forum for a few years now, and I remember all the "i'm God - AMA" posts and I remeber how I felt annoyed and pissed off by them :-) All the people who writes nice things to me/asks geniune questions - to my ego - in this topic, it's easily to see that they are the most conscious. The ones who fool around are just egoes with a narrow consciousness, lack of Self-love, lack of insight, lack of understanding, lack of direct experience :-) I feel sorry for them, but I hope they'll get there. I've been there myself. <3 Don't say sorry for your ego. Let my post piss you off. Let you experience how you also find it funny. To conclude, yes, it feels Good. Amazing. Hehe How can I, as God, fool myself? <3 It's pretty easy actually. We all do it. Now I remember I'm God, so no more fooling around <3 Hey. I am an ordinary human being. I just know I'm God. That's all. I don't want to be a non-ordinary human being. I like being human, for now. But to take the bait, my friend, have you ever wondered about all the chemicals right now flooding around in your so-called sober brain, like right now as you're reading these words? The most prominent/dominating one is called 'serotonin'. It's a natural chemical. A neuro-transmitter. It hits all the receptors in your brain that 2C-B, DMT, 5-MeO, LSD, psilocin also hits. They are all serotonin-agonists. You probably don't know what that means, since your post obviously reflects a deep lack of knowledge about the topic. But anyway, I'll continue, cos this is fun! So you can easily call serotonin a pscyhedelic. Easily. Hell, look at the structure of serotonin. It's nearly identical to psilocin and DMT. The difference between the psychedelics -- serotonin included -- is how they differ in their binding affinity to specific serotonin-receptors in the brain (cos there are many different ones). My question to you, dear observer, is: When will you come down from your serotonion-trip ??? Other questions I want you to ponder: - What is the difference between consciousness and outside physical reality/stuff? - What is the difference between a dream and what we call ordinary, waking reality? - What were you before you were born? - What will happen to you when you die? - What happens to you when you go to deep sleep? Look. You're already hallucinating. You're hallucinating/tripping on serotonin. So am I, right now. We are fucking God tripping, hallucinating herself to believe she is a human being! How fucking hillarious is that, mate? Only difference between you and me is that I know I'm God tripping, while you still pretend to be "poor little me, poor little "the observer". Get out of it, God! Come on! For God's sake! <3 Outside pyschedelics just helps to tweak the serotonin-system a bit, strips you off your ego (it kills the default-mode-network), widens your consciousness and gets you access to your True Self. I have also thought a lot about how I now have zero desire to ever get drunk on alcohol again. Alcohol really lowers your consciousness. And I don't want that. I want to remain in a high state of consciousness as much as possible. In one specific way, however, alcohol may actually widen your consciousness. Namely in the way it sort of makes you less inhibited/less worried about your self-image. This action alone is the sole reason why people drink. ----- Much love to everyone here. That is, to myself <3

I think one of the most beautiful things was seeing how all the pain and suffering I have endured in my life was something I did to myself in order to get to where I am right now. And right now I don't think I can ever suffer again. Sure, there will be pain in various ways. But I don't think I will resist and suffer anymore. I feel so fucking free. And I have to add to that that I also felt very light-weight and free in the past month leading up to this 2CB-trip. I really don't care much about other people's opinions anymore. All that matters is my own opionion of myself. And hey, I'm God, and other people's opinions are thus also my opinion's, so in a way I still have to care, but I just do it in a non-needy/selfless way now. A conscious way. When you stop caring about what other people think of you, when you stop worrying about your self-image, then it feels like you step out of a space suit. You feel so light in mind and body. And you get muuuuuuuuch more energy. It's like I don't even need that much sleep now. No more energy spent on how to please other people. I just please myself now, and every other human being is myself.

♥️ ♥️ ♥️

I mean that everything that happens in everyone's lives is always God's/my will. Before and after enlightenment. Nothing changes. All that changes is that when you become enlightened/remember you're God, then it's like God through that human-form can make changes "on-the-fly". From a human PoV you have 0 free will if your consciousness is very low/selfish/narrow. (You may very well believe and feel that you are free to take your own choices but that's a big illusion. As long as you identify with your ego-body-mind-persona, you are per definition not free). The more you expand your consciousness the more free you become. When you fully realize you're God you become absolutely free to make free changes on the fly. Before you could also make changes on the fly, but they were "not-free" in the sense that the changes were determined by God. Now that I'm enlightened the changes are still made by God, but that's fucking me, and I know it's me! Ta-dahh, you see? Waking up is realizing that absolutely speakning you have never made a mistake and you can never make one! (Relatively speaking lots of mistakes have been made and I'll make more. But they will absolutely speaking be perfect/correct/not-mistakes/made out of Love/Goodness). (changes = choices in this context).

I gotta say that I think music really helped me during my 2CB-trip. I listened to Jon Hopkins. I just pressed shuffly play Jon Hopkins and listened to his tracks only for 3 hours straight in my earphones (Jaybird Vista, very nice earphones). It was amazing how Spotify's algorithm just seemed to pick the right songs in the right order of Jon Hopkins. Of course I am Spotify's algorithm, so it makes sense. One track that absolute destroyed and shattered me was this one: Listen to it in quality headphones with high volume and close your eyes and drift away. Works even sober.

Note that I said "best possible explanation through _language_" . Simultaneously is a special word to use. In one way it works. In another way it doesn't. The reason it kind of doesn't work is that "time" is also just imagination/an illusion. To say "one at a time" is also kind of true and not true. It just can't be put into words fully. But existence is absolute infinite in infinite many ways. Know that. "Can I became consciouss that I experienced @WaveInTheOcean's life directly? " Look, you are already experiencing the life of WaveInTheOcean just as I am right now also experiencing the life of Javfly33. you = I = God WaveInTheOcean and javfly33 are just imagined isolated ego-body-minds within God's infinite mind. The reason you - relatively speaking - can't consciously transform your current PoV-experience into WaveInTheOcean's-PoV-experience is that >>>YOU ALREADY ARE EXPERIENCING IT<<< =D So of course, relatively speaking, I as WaveInTheOcean cannot read your mind right now. Just as you cannot read mine.

Oh yes, it feels very Good to merge with the Ocean, finally This wave surely was wild and long before it finally collapsed. It slowly got smaller and slowly approached the surface these last 12 months. This experience feels like the final splash.

As a slight off-topic I would add that I find 2C-B very interesting because it retains your language-abilities. Like 2CB makes your mood super trippy. How you feel is trippy in body end emotions (and your consciousness is very much expanded so that it feels like you can get insights from outside yourself, talk with "others"). But you can still think pretty clear if you want to. It's been years since LSD, but I remember on LSD that everything, including my thinking, got veeeeeeeery trippy. Like it was hard making a coherent sentence. Maybe I was just unmature back then. However I can read that many say they can act out sober on 2CB if they want to. And that's pretty true in my experience. Very good beginner psychedelic (in lower doses though).

Neither and both is the answer. Existence is inherently paradoxical from the human PoV, if you didn't knew that already. If you want to answer the question in a relative biological true way, I guess most biologists would say the egg came first. You can read up on that if you want. It's called evolutionary biology.

WaveInTheOcean as an ego/isolated mind is honored for your reply, dear Leo ;D God is honored too I guess. ;D The experience felt like getting done for good. Like a puzzle piece being assembled in all the right ways. However, you are right, now this finished puzzle piece can begin enter a new larger puzzle. That new larger puzzle now has to be assembled. And so to infinity.

@Javfly33 Thank you brother. Good luck in your pursuits as well <3 No problem. solipsism can relatively speaking be viewed as true. Absolutely speaking, it's not. The only things that are absolutely true are: God. Consciousness. Love. Absolute Infinity. Infinite Imagination. And all these 5 things are all pointing to the same truth: God. Language/words are just pointers though. Either you directly get it or you don't. Words don't really matter (yet they also do in a sense, in order to ground you as God in human form). You can surely come up with more Absolute True words for the Absolute Truth. LIke "Nothingness" and so on. It all works (as pointers).

Yes. You and I are the same - God. The best explanation possible through language is this: I/You - as God - is "simultaneously" imagning "WaveInTheOcean" and "justfortoday" as two different isolated "minds/persons/bodies" within God's dream. These two minds have their own different private thoughts. However the thought-creater/the thought-perceiver/knower/the thought-substance is all: God/Me/You.

Both. Other people surely have thoughts of their own, relatively speaking. Just like WaveInTheOcean does. However, ultimately speaking, all people are imagined by me, God. Leo's "trick" of differentiating between relative truths and Absolute Truth is really smart and helpful in this work.

Proper preparation / studying is probably of uttermost importance if you want to waken up through psychedelics. Just taking a psychedelic alone is not gonna work for most people. I have listened to many teachers: Leo, Spira, Watts to name 3. I have read a good deal of books on spirituality. All this has helped a lot in attuning me. No doubt. I think suffering is nessecary too. I for sure have suffered a lot these last 5 years. I think if you are so "unlucky/lucky" to get a full-blown enlightenment without having an ego ready to "ground" it, then you'll probably lose it like that youtuber did. Losing it as in wanting to do crazy things like commiting suicide. If you have a stage orange ego and get a full blown God-realization you either have to be really open to change yourself or you can do the easy thing: completely merge with God/yourself (that is: "losing it").

Short answer: It helps.

Why God? Because God. God is you! You = Consciousness = God. Only you forgot it (on purpose).

Neither. The chicken-egg came first. You can't have tails without heads and vice-versa. Relatively speaking, it's the complete opposite of love. However, ultimately speaking -- from the PoV of me/God - everything that happens is my doing and i'm doing it out of Love. One of the major reasons behind my motivation to create life/existence is to challenge myself of how loving I can be. And police brutality, rape, terroism, racism, nazism and other nasty "evil" things are some of the biggest challenges, indeed.

<3 <3 Thank you, best of luck to you too brother <3 <3