Spiritual Autolysis

[Spiritual Warrior]

Spiritual Autolysis Journal Entry #68  Wed July 30, 2025 6:55 AM

Samadhi

Lowers self: Hey, we need to talk about this voice in my head. What is it exactly? 

Higher Self: What voice? 

Lower self: This voice. This voice that I can hear inside of my head that is being heard by me and then being typed onto this screen. What is it? 

Higher self: I don't hear anything...

Lower self: What do you mean? Of course you hear something, we both hear it. It's right here. Open your fucking ears.

Higher Self: Nope. 

Lower self: Okay, whatever. Then I am hallucinating a voice inside of my own head

Higher Self: Yep, that is correct. 

Lower self: What is a hallucination anyways?

Higher self: A hallucination is something that is not real, it is completely fabricated and imagined. There is nothing tangible or concrete about it and therefore is no Truth behind it.

Lower self: But the voice inside of my head feels so real to me. I can hear it speaking to me. 

Higher Self: Who is speaking to whom? 

Lower self: The voice is coming from me and is speaking to me... Ben... The voice is telling me what to do, how to behave, etc .. 

Higher Self: Why do you listen to this voice? 

Lower self: I listen to the voice because I feel like I have no choice in the matter. I cannot shut this voice off. Therefore, it just feels like it is a part of who I am. 

Higher Self: Why can't you shut it off? 

Lower self: I'm not sure. But I virtually have no control over it. I am at the mercy of this voice and therefore cannot get any peace and quiet. I just want this voice to shut the fuck up. 

Higher Self: You can shut it off actually. This is what a samdhi experience is like. All of your attention is pointed towards one thing. This eclipses everything else around it and you dissolve into the experience of that one thing that you are focusing on. In this state, there is no mind, no thoughts, no emotions, just pure experience, pure nothingness, pure samadhi.

Lower self: Wowwwww, that sounds amazing. 

Higher Self: It is amazing, now get to work...

[Spiritual Warrior]

Interlude: Messages from Her

Lower self: I am no one. There is no me. Don't you see that? There is no me. I do not exist. I, the person that I believe myself to be is not real. He is not a tangible thing. I've created a story inside my own head.

My true nature is that of an infinite shape shifter, that can experience anything that it desires. The issue is that I will not allow my mind to get there. Why is that? 

Her: Fear.

Lower self: Fear... But what is that? 

Her: Fear is what keeps you alive.

Make your story beautiful. Cherish life. Dream up the most magnificent dreams that you can possibly imagine. Your hearts should be bursting with love and energy, spines tingling with joy at the majesty of  existence.