First Trip: Dipping the toe into the water with 5g magic truffle tea

[Loving Radiance]

Date: 31. August 2020

Set: Relaxed. In the background there were nagging thoughts that didn't feel good... however nothing impactful.

Setting: w/ trip sitter in nature on a lake; on my own at dorm site, supermarket, campus and dorm room

Prelude: I initially wanted to take 75ug of 1P-LSD if my efforts for the truffle package would be for nothing. So, I called the delivery support line for the location of my package 'cause I already waited for the delivery for 5 days. I got off to a nice bakery, picked it up and opened the grow kit at home.

Prep: I ate 2 bananas that day and had no food intake at least less than 6 hours before the tea. I removed substratum from truffles, threw the substratum in the trash (yes, I now know that there could have grown more, noobie mistake of me), cleaned the truffles with a brush and got a teabag. I made a strong ginger tea, while I cut the 5g down to snippets. The first truffle teacup got 20min & I reused the same 5g for another cup and 20min for optimal extraction. My mistake here was me pouring boiling water into the cup.

I got no intention for the trip. Beforehand, I wrote down experiencing healing love and a perspective that would make me more functional for human survival, but that proved itself to be not necessary because of the low dose.

 

Report: 30 minutes after intake I got to the lake. Nobody was there. The setting sun was shining through the treetops and a breeze came over the water and sand. I placed my blanket close to the beach and began to get still to really notice any changes in perception. My head felt heavier while the weight itself did not change.

My trip sitter came after few minutes. We chatted a bit about how I felt. With progressing time, I was less able to speak full sentences. I felt a disconnect in how I could sense and articulate these changes.

One hour in, my thoughts became less tangible. I felt energy in my hands and feet. My 3rd eye pulsated. I began to feel energy all over my face especially in chin, mouth and nose like in deep meditation and then more strongly all over my forehead like during cacao ceremonies. I got a heavy/oppressive feeling in my nose which I usually get in deep meditation.

We talked a bit more about random things. However, language became less understandable in its meaning and there was more disconnection & forgetting to what was said previously.

I got up hunting for some visuals. I went to the beach and watched the water: There were tiny droplet like waves in between the waves washing ashore. I wasn’t surprised, I saw that being sober, but now it just came effortlessly without intentionally relaxing or becoming still to notice it. I looked at sand and fixated it: around my fixated point of interest the surrounding sand began to move. I saw some fellow students in the far back, however they were not recognizable for me. I waved to them, but these kind of customs for human interactions felt less tangible & with less meaning.

I got back to the blankets and got still again. I heard a person coming from behind and surprisingly a man on his jogging tour came from the front. I wore a hood and the sound was directed around to come from behind.

In perceiving thoughts and senses, I felt constructs to slowly lose their limits & separations. They got meaningless and merged with other closely related constructs. I felt a general confusion in this world.

My trip sitter got up to do some workout to stay warm during our time at the lake. As he got more far away I saw him becoming smaller, his height to be like a manikin. He seemed to be smaller because he as a form of material reality was seen on a canvas. The sense of him being far away was not connected to seeing him smaller. The sense of depth was loosing its limits.

I told my buddy that I wanted to go alone to other beaches on the lake, that I would come back in a short amount of time. On the path through the park the distances seemed to collapse through experiencing the moment & collapsing of the concept of time. In retrospect, time was meaningless. The memory of there being two beaches merged into one and I was confused because the beaches were still two and at the same time merged into one. It was interesting to see at that time how constructs of the same category merge.

Throughout the trip I sensed what this altered perspective is capable of and I got insights that made me understand the logic behind things happening on a trip: I understand how bad trips can happen. I understand how the killing of the body is entirely possible. I understand how one can travel to other dimensions. I understand how trees can speak. I understand why people seem crazy. There were one or two other insights that were forgotten, but this sense of getting constructs from this perspective was fascinating.

In documentation during the trip I mixed up the sequence of things occurring, which was also very fascinating to witness. 1.5h after intake the texture of the ground moved in a wavelike manner. The sense of identity was clearly there as preferences & tendencies were still there. 2h after intake the thoughts were fleeting.

It got time for us to go back to the dorms. When packing our stuff together I found it not to be possible to plan or solve any intellectual problem.

I jogged besides with him being on his bike on the street (small sized town). I seemed to semi recognize the traffic rules; they too lost their limits & separations. My trip sitter and I parted back at the dorm. There were other people and I didn’t quite know how to behave with them. Behaving in social situations seemed to be pointless and my ego felt awkward to just do anything. There was no confidence to project outwards or act out, and an insecurity came forth. Functional (survival) behaviors seemed to be recognized but I was unable to act out as they were not tangible.

Nevertheless, I went to the supermarket to buy a salty snack and to wander over the campus with. Still on the way there I had trouble recognizing familiar & unfamiliar people. Inside when choosing the snack, I saw the judgement of “don’t eat that ‘cause that’s bad for you” to be less relevant. Basic math was possible. The taste of the snack was same & somehow different - different like I tasted for the first time a completely new taste. The sensation in the mouth felt full, dull and heavy which does not necessarily mean that it was a bad feeling. The act of reaching into it, pulling out a few beans stuffing it into my mouth felt primordial. Just interesting.

Coming back to my apartment, I read a few threads at the forum. The posts had no coherence and I dismissed them. I watched a videogame on YouTube and ate a pizza: Stories of every kind were less comprehensible, and I remembered that a story told by my trip sitter was less comprehensible too. My sense of orientation within the story of the video was non-existent - just getting dulled by consumption. Magical animations in the game became real. I ate the pizza like an animal with my mouth. Eating with this style felt different. Felt like being in a primordial trance.

 

Insights:

• Consciousness is to perceive form.
• The experience of reality is formless and fluid.
• There are no separations, and constructs are constructed (duh). It becomes apparent that the sense of self is constructed.
• “I” is a thought construct that is believed to be tangible.
• Visuals are fascinating and nice pointers to the state of being.

 

I felt good to open my perspective to this altered perspective as it felt good to contemplate & explore perspectives using my journal. Next time I want to trip alone in nature or at home just to meditate & be.

Edited September 10, 2020 by Loving Radiance
date, addition at report, understanding