Overcoming Sexual Performance Anxiety

[GeorgeLawson]

What I'm about to share with you is very personal and something I've only recently had the courage to talk about and even admit to myself: 

I suffer really badly from sexual performance anxiety and as such most of my attempts to have sex with girls have failed bar one (which wasn't even that pleasurable because I was so anxious about keeping it up). 

I saw a video on youtube recently which gave me a little assurance that this is a commonly shared issue. It's based around what it's author calls 'The Basic Instinct Formula' and has a lot to do with the limiting beliefs our culture instills in us about the sexual roles of men and women. I would urge you to watch this video and let me know if you have any insights regarding sexual performance anxiety.

Many thanks,

George

 

[Mistico]

Hi bro, I know what you feel, I'd like you to watch out for this possible causes.

-Porn and masturbation. Don't understimate the importance of this man, it could be the only reason for sexual performance problems.

-Being too much in your head, don't try to imagine how good or bad is going to be the intercourse, just be present and try to enjoy yourself at every step, don't focus too much on your couple, contraintuitively she's gonna feel more at ease. 

-Don't ever believe the past defines who you are.

Good luck.

 

[Lynnel]

Take viagra once so you don't have that stress anymore and then proceed to have sex and you won't have the issue anymore because it shall boost your confidence. 

If it doesn't work don't get hooked on viagra and go see a psychologist.

No porn/ no fast and meditation for being more present should also help.

[Corte]

I just want to assure you that you are making great progress already in this moment, I find that when I learn about/research my problems, they begin to dissolve. I'd encourage you to learn as much as you can about every aspect of this. I'm sure the men/fellow bros in your life have contributed countless awful beliefs. 

In my opinion, if the feeling of anxiety is magnified by your partner to begin with, she's probably not worth your time. Sex is a beautiful connection shared by people, it's not something that should be judged or used for recreation. I guess I'm saying you should redefine your entire perspective of sex. Something that brings peace to the subject, like realizing that the importance placed on it by society as the ultimate goal, is not true. 

You can also use this feeling/issue as source of deeper understanding within yourself. Is it possible you're attempting to fill a void through these interactions? What is it that you wish to be fulfilled? What do you really want from all of this?