AlldayLoop

Question about "How To Spot A Sociopath"

3 posts in this topic

https://www.actualized.org/insights/how-to-spot-a-sociopath

As Leo has pointed out, "If you have a sociopath in your life, don’t accommodate him or try to reform him. Cut him out of your life entirely."

What then are we supposed to do with these types of people in our societies? Leave them out to be alone? Put them in a mental hospital? 

How will these people change their ways if they can't even seek support for themselves? 

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I actually lived with a sociopath for a couple years, and if you understand them its actually not that hard to cope with them. Essentially, you just have to understand that a sociopath sees everything through an INCREDIBLY selfish and narcissistic lens, BUT, there's legitimately no malice behind it. They are incapable of seeing anything wrong with their actions, but they rarely intend to actually cause harm. Instead, its a by-product of their attempts to satisfy the basic needs that we all seek to satisfy, but without the empathy that allows the rest of us to reduce the potential harm of our actions.

In my experience, the best way to deal with a sociopath is to adopt a similar standard of behavior with them. This doesn't mean be an ass, what it means is don't expect them to connect with you on any meaningful level. I have a lot of fond memories of hanging out with my sociopathic friend, precisely because I accepted the fact he was a sociopath and didn't expect any more from him, and didn't invest myself, just like he didn't invest any of himself in me. Sociopaths are only really harmful if you either don't realize they're a sociopath, or if you expect something from them that they literally can't provide.

In terms of actually answering your questions, though, I don't think we're supposed to do anything. Education is important, as the signs are actually fairly obvious if you know what to look for (I understand I might be a special case, seeing as I lived with one for years, but whenever I've pointed it out to people they thought it was super obvious in hindsight,) at which point it's just like dealing with any person with a mental disorder. As for changing their ways, I legitimately don't think its possible. But if you've ever really talked with one at length, it becomes pretty obvious they don't want to change. They're happy the way they are, and they don't mind missing out. The only way I can see to possibly "rehabilitate" a sociopath is to educate the people around them, so that they can no longer take advantage of them. If their behavior ceases to give them what they want, they'll have to adapt and change it.

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Exactly. What if I'm a sociopath? Is personal development pointless to me? Its not like sociopaths chose to be sociopaths. We are just supposed to completely reject them? How is that unconditional love?

Just because they have a different lens with which they see the world doesn't make their way "wrong."

Edited by onacloudynight

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