Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
Gabriel Antonio

150 Min/day Do Nothing For 10 Days

8 posts in this topic

___________________________________________________________________________________________

BACKGROUND

Prior Meditation Practice

I meditated 4 hours a day for about 6 months (Oct 2016 - April 2017). This practice helped me rejuvenate, go back to my natural body shape, and practice hardcore comfort zone challenges.

Hiatus

However, I completely stopped practicing the do-nothing technique about a month ago, after a huge insight at an ayahuasca cermony--to focus heavily on overcoming shyness. Furthermore, I got very inspired by evangelical churches. In essence, I was both socializing and praying a lot. This worked pretty well, but now I feel an inner drive to turn inwards. Why? I feel like I have become totally part of the herd. The more I seek these outter desires, the less fulfilled I feel.

New Chapter of My Life - New Journal

I have another journal here on this forum ("Letting God Work Itself Through Me), which I don't feel like updating--because I feel like I am in a new chapter of my journey. This journal right here is to help me stay motivated to meditate, which is very easy to slack off. 

I feel like investing more time in contemplating life, having the courage to be with myself, and watching myself transform in this process of self-observation.

___________________________________________________________________________________________

PRE-TOTEM 

What could go wrong?

- "I am wasting my time being alone. I have got to socialize more!!!" 

- Go to an ayahuasca ceremony (which takes place from 9:00 PM - 5:00 AM) and don't meditate the next day due to tiredness. 

- Think my situation is getting worse. (Reminder to myself: Expect your situation to get worse & thoughts of self-doubt)

- Get influenced by what other people say about me. ("Oh, you're ignoring me", "You're acting all weird.", "What happened to you?")

- Start focusing on other habits. (Reminder to myself: Just fucking focus on the meditation, and the rest will take care of itself.) 

___________________________________________________________________________________________

GUIDELINES

- Meditate sitting on a chair (or crosslegged) with my spine upright. 

- Can be indoors or outdoors 

- External sounds produced only by third parties (i.e., go to the quiestest place possible) 

___________________________________________________________________________________________
 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 1 (6-6-2017)

Total: 150 minutes (as of 11:20 PM)

Level of difficulty: Easy

3 Thoughts/Insights: 

> It's ok to think anything you want. 

> It is almost impossible to engage in unhealthy behaviors (e.g., binge) if you have meditated a lot during the day.  

> Always remember to relax your face. 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 2 (6-7-2017)

Total: 250 minutes (as of 11:18 PM)

Level of difficulty: Easy

3 Thoughts/Insights: 

> I feel like meditating for longer periods. 4 hours is ideal. I feel like I have only had enough of formal meditation when I stop thinking about it. If I keep thinking, "Oh, man... I wish I could be meditating right now." Then, it is a sign to meditate more.

> Turning inwards is not as painful as it may seem. No matter the situation, meditation is always here to alleviate what you're going through.

> It is quite sad to see myself engaging in unhealthy behaviors (e.g., overeating, depressive moods etc.). However, I recognize that I need to have patience with myself. And keep practicing!

I have been feeling a deep bitterness towards other people. Hyper-annoyance.

Both my mom and my sister have said, "You're weird!" Also, a friend thinks sent me a message like, "Get out of the shadow. Go back to the light."

I have become conscious of how needy our society has become. It is liberating yet challenging to extricate myself from this quagmire.

Edited by Gabriel Antonio

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 3 (6-8-2017)

Total: 255 minutes

Level of difficulty: Medium

3 Thoughts/Insights: 

> I am able to digest all the info I am bombarded daily when I meditate.

> It is a real challenge to be a hardcore meditator. But I do think it is possible to find time to do so. We only have to strategize in order to pull off lots of hours of meditation.

> I had a deep natural urge to meditate today. I was with a friend, and I was thinking, "Man, I can't wait to contemplate life in my meditation."  I have been craving for my solo times.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 4 (6-9-2017)

Total: 240 minutes

Level of difficulty: Medium

3 Thoughts/Insights

> Everything we do is an attempt for us to feel well. That's the ultimate result we want. To feel well.

> At some point, unwanted behaviors simply lose their pull over us if we are flexing our awareness muscle daily. "Eating a double cheeseburger? Why would I do that?" The key point is to always observe yourself, and change will pour in.

> I like to set "interval bells" for every 10 minutes so that if I am about to stop the meditation prematurely, I tell myself, "Ok, let me wait until the next bell rings."

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 4 (6-10-2017)

Total: 150 minutes

Level of difficulty: Hard

3 Thoughts/Insights

> I feel like I am fooling myself into meditating for so long. Maybe I should focus on more basic things...

> I want moments of true and enjoyable solitude. Lately, my meditations have been like hell. And this is not a good thing. Instead of me going out and see people, I isolate myself. Needless suffering...

> I have realized that I have an extremely pro-active part and an extremely lethargic part. The goal is to integrate them.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 4 (6-11-2017)

Total: 150 minutes

Level of difficulty: Medium

3 Thoughts/Insights: 

> The problem is not that people or your ego dislike you, the problem is that you care too much.

> Notice how much your mind exaggerates how "unpleasant" meditation is. The only times that I don't like to meditate is when I am not meditating.

> Breathing is everything. Correct your breath, and you will experience life more deeply.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Day 5 (7-12-2017)

Total: 150 minutes

Level of difficulty: Medium (6/10)

3 Thoughts/Insights

> You cannot hide nor lie to yourself for long enough in meditation. That's why it works.

> I am nailing meditation. Question is: Is it becoming a mental masturbation?

> Focus on one thing and forget the rest.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0