Hedge of moss and moon 🌘

[Lila9]

May 15, 2026.

I opened a new journal. 

I write about all that wants to be written through me.

[Lila9]

I’m fascinated by black holes. I imagine or I heard a theory about aliens knowing how to use them for travel and for energy.

I hope to be alive when there are some major discoveries about them.

 

I painted one with gouache last year. I put it on my sacred altar. It reminds me of the greatness, vastness, the mystery, and the horror of the universe.

[Lila9]

I am writing this while one of my dogs is sitting on my lap, after she did a little cute fart ❤️

[Lila9]

The last episode of Euphoria was something.

The minutes of Rue dying after a fentanyl overdose, and the dying hallucinations, are so symbolic.

In the hallucinations, she returns to her home, where her mother is waiting for her and accepting her with open arms, and then she hugs her deceased father.

She returns home, to her mother, to her womb, to nothingness, to death.

 

Very sad, very beautiful.

Someone brought to my attention that, at the beginning of the first episode of Season 1, Rue talks about being in her mother's womb and describes her birth.

I don't know whether it was deliberate or not, but it is interesting.

The show started with Rue's birth, describing her mother's womb, and ended with her death, returning to the home of her mother.

It creates a closure: the story begins with her emerging from her mother's womb and ends with her returning to her mother's home, as if completing a circle.

 

Though Sam Levinson is an asshole, especially after stealing from Petra the asthetics of the first season, I love the show.

It is based on the Israeli show of the same name, which I also watched when I was a teenager. It is just as wild as the American version, following a girl who is addicted to drugs because she feels guilty for the death of an innocent man at a party, caused by her boyfriend (if I remember correctly).

She lives with the deceased man's friend, who sleeps constantly because he cannot face reality after the tragic loss. He is always dreaming about a trip he took to South America with his late friend.

There is also a nerd who is in love with the drug-addicted girl, and he is the one who supplies her with drugs. He creates them in his home lab and experiments on her. Eventually, he performs brain surgery on himself to remove his amygdala, the part responsible for fear, and ends up raping his crush in the final episode.

He also works with a religious child who handles selling the drugs and is a little criminal. If I remember correctly he is also bullied by his peers.

They live with the child's brother, who is addicted to sex. He constantly brings women back to the apartment for orgies and radical acts because normal sex no longer excites him.

He has a rich friend who is addicted to porn and sleeps with his immigrant housekeeper.

There is also an insecure girl who desperately seeks attention from men on social media and constantly settles for less. She met the sex addict through the internet. I think he rejected her if I remember correctly.

While there are some similarities to the American show Euphoria, and I can clearly see where it drew inspiration from the Israeli series, they are still pretty different.

 

Edited 1 hour ago by Lila9