Seeing through the patterns of nature

[Justin my mind]

Someone I feel really drawn to said she wanted to take me on a drive and listen to music. I’ve always wanted to do that with somebody I’m attracted to. You could never predict what’s gonna happen in the appearing future, but I feel like it’s not gonna happen I feel a sense of existential dread and need to surrender to no attachment. I have spoken about soft white underbelly interview, and I feel like I could see the patterns unfold who knows she might get back to me you never know, but I feel a sense of sadness and the part of me that’s never been when the text appeared awareness knew that it was either something beautiful happening or horrible tragedy. I know this won’t last forever, but it’s been causing a lot of childhood trauma to come up and I know either. I’ll be with it in faith that’s something will happen or I will have to hold on to where this is leading me I have had cerebral palsy all my life and I’ve struggled with getting with people I’m attracted to even I was just friends and I have to accept that I may or may not get what I need. I’m trying to see the beauty and other things, but my inner child is screaming