Witness The Unthinkable

[ivankiss]

I guess time will tell. 

My plan stays the same. Regardless of who may or may not join me somewhere down the line. 

[ivankiss]

Why would I get back with my ex when I now have all these hot 20yr old girls throwing themselves at me? Well because I'm clearly looking for the real deal. Not just to get my dick wet. 

It does feel like it could work now much better than before. Simply because I have made this huge statement by moving away. And further, remaining silent. 

I know she loves me. I know she wants me. And I'd be lying if I said that I don't feel attracted to her anymore. Because I do. In my mind, she still turns me on more than any of these little girls. 

[ivankiss]

Haha gotta love when my hearth chakra waves are interfering with my bluetooth speakers. 

[ivankiss]

Jk I don't believe in that new age hippy nonsense. 

[ivankiss]

I never went back to an ex. Maybe I hooked up with one or two of them, but never actually started dating again. I don't stay in touch with my exes. Like, ever. 

Maybe I could make an exception this one time. Just to see if there's anything there. It feels like there is. 

I would not call it unfinished business perse. More like unrealized potential. 

 

Edited yesterday at 10:25 AM by ivankiss

[ivankiss]

In any case, even if she wanted to come and join me now, she can't. Her passport won't let her. She cannot enter this country. And I'm glad it's that way. I still need some time alone. To finish what I started here. 

However... I know she'd be more than willing to fly some place else to meet me. 

Asia, for example. 

[ivankiss]

I guess what I'm trying to say is... yes, the door is still somewhat open, I'm kind of curious and I'm sort of keeping her as an option. 

[ivankiss]

Now back to reality. 

[ivankiss]

I shit you not, just as I finished typing that, I got a text from the Italian girl, saying that she's free on Wednesday. 

Lord have mercy. 

 

[ivankiss]

One thing is for sure... I'm still way too broke to be entertaining this many girls at once haha! 

[ivankiss]

I'm not crying you are. 

[ivankiss]

Spiralling nights in the void
Weathered coat and a dagger
If I dream back my youth
I can still hear you sing
A voice that will die on a mountain

And I fear
That I've stayed here
Just a little too long

[ivankiss]

I had to go where you couldn't follow
In my weariness
I still hear you singing in my mind

I'm in every season
The one you have always known
Life did not reward you
So find your way to the river and let go

[ivankiss]

The shifting earth beneath us 
The clouds at our feet
The sun was made of a jewel
When at night it did sleep

Nothing to observe

[ivankiss]

Wow. Everything is completely up to me and it's terrifying. 

[ivankiss]

Look papa no training wheels! 

[ivankiss]

Not sure if I'm projecting myself so far into the future because I think it's going to get me there faster, or because I don't want to be here. 

[ivankiss]

No we can't skip to the good part. 

Bite down. 

[ivankiss]

And there we go... 

Woke up to a blessing. 

[ivankiss]

It's all in how you breathe.