The transition from Ultraviolet to Clear Light: The end of the road

[Fearey]

So, I just realized I haven't really spoken at all about my spiritual journey since my post more than 3 years ago, where I talked about my transition from Coral (Indigo) to Teal (Violet), my experiences and the shifts it had on me as a person. There is a good reason why I haven't talked at all about my spiritual journey since then, and that's because around this time is when I ended my spiritual journey. I considered myself done, and I was satisfied with where I was.

Then about one year following that, another major shift happened in my subconscious, a silent, hyper-focused efficiency in all pursuits and a deeply rooted grounded-ness and peace with all that is. It's surprisingly a lot more difficult to talk about Ultraviolet from the point of Clear Light as it is about as different as any first tier stage would be from Ultraviolet. There are almost no commonalities between the two, and I'm having a hard time relating to this point in time despite not even having spent two weeks since I began transitioning to fourth tier consciousness.

So, to get to the meat of it all. What and how did this come to be? Well, you see, I met this girl in school, and through her presence experienced selfless love for the first time in my life. This however was not the reason this change could take place, it was the intense emotional highs and lows that resulted from our relationship, resulting in both more pain and more happiness than I had ever experienced before in my life. This emotional rollercoaster eventually led me to face and unknowingly discard the last remaining parts of my ego. What followed was that I had unknowingly started to integrate the selfless love I felt for her, shaping my very being, allowing me to produce these feelings within and by myself.

I didn't know it until it dawned on me a week later, but I had just started tapping into clear light. Looking back, that much is clear. Barriers related to feeling exhausted, physical and mental tiredness, limitations in focus all simply disappeared. While I can obviously still get physically tired like if I don't get enough sleep, since this point in time I've been immune to physical and mental tiredness in every other sense of the word. 

Even back in Ultraviolet, I would've never believed something like this to be possible for anyone, period. It feels like a transcendence of introversion and extroversion in many regards, as energy is no longer derived from socializing with groups of people or being by myself, but simply through being, resulting in limitless storages of energy throughout every moment of every day. This has been my reality for the past 12 days, and I've tried to test it by pushing myself to an extent that would have completely broken my past self.

One such test was to study an extremely technical subject I'm working on, but for 15 hours straight, where 5 minutes of rest follows after 90 minutes of deep focus work until 15 hours have passed. I expected this to completely break me mentally, however it didn't. My focus didn't waver one bit throughout the day and I got more progress done than in the last week and a half put together.

Ongoing list of immediate changes and insights from clear light when compared to any prior stages:

• Introversion and extroversion transcended. Energy flows freely, infinitely at every moment of every day with no effort needed to maintain it.
• Any and all past barriers and imagined limitations disappear completely. What's left is to witness the endless possibilities of it all, and to casually sail the waves of time.
• The capacity for deep uninterrupted work is supercharged to what would previously seem like an impossible degree. Sitting uninterrupted with something for x number of hours, be it 12 hours or 20 hours straight makes no difference. It's as effortless during the first hour as it is during the last. The beingness that happens at this stage makes past limitations, self-imposed or otherwise vanish as if they were never there to begin with.
• Physical capacity is greatly enhanced and too feels effortless when compared to what could be achieved before and what back then would have pushed the body to the breaking point now becomes an effortless dance between mind and matter.
• An outlook on what is with a profound sense of childlike wonder. Everything becomes magical and interesting, as if opening ones eyes for the first time.
• Extremely high levels of compassion, warmth and care for everything and everyone around me.
• Moodiness transcended. Permanent sense of bliss, wonder and unbound potential.
• Complete disconnect between past and present. No reference points to look back on, even from prior stages like Ultraviolet.
• There can't be any "after" as all limitations and dualities break apart at this point. It's very appropriately set as the final stage, as there can't be any after, when there is nothing more left for there to be an "after" of.

I will probably keep adding to this post as I experience more, and I will date my updates accordingly. I've only "been" at what I perceive to be clear light for 5 days now (while the transition lasted 7 days), and which most definitely has to be a 4th tier stage due to how radically different it is from any prior stage or tier.

It's been difficult for me to post about this sooner, as I've been having great difficulty grounding myself in reality following this realization. My body has very much been lagging behind so to say, but it's getting better by the day.

2024-11-21 16:58 GMT

• More about me. While I've been "on the path" very actively for the better part of 11 years, I've never taken psychedelics, so I've never gotten to experience glimpses of higher states of consciousness, only to drop down again right afterwards. Every time my consciousness has shifted, that new stage has quickly become the new baseline.

Edited November 22, 2024 by Fearey

[Fearey]

2024-11-22 16:10 GMT

Introverted intuition, combined with radical open-mindedness, I think has done a lot of the heavy lifting for me throughout this 11 year long journey that's now come to an end. Peter Ralson's The Book of Not Knowing played a great part in enhancing my level of open-mindedness, a book that I've read more times than I can count. 

For my personality, without the combination of the two, I could never dream of making such advances in such a short time, or ever. What pushed me to clear light was completely out of my control. Like waking up one day and winning the lottery several times in a row.

I had to meet someone that could 1. produce the feeling of selfless love within me, and 2. would challenge me mentally to such a degree that I'd nearly break down on a daily basis for a couple weeks. The odds of these two taking place at the same time seems astronomically low, but nevertheless it happened. All ties to past stages of development seemingly permanently severed.

Edited November 22, 2024 by Fearey

[Fearey]

2024-11-26 20:25 GMT

Clear light differs from all other stages in that it doesn't integrate prior stages. It discards them completely.

[Fearey]

2025-01-03 19:45 GMT

Clear Light consciousness radiates an intense and uncompromising extroverted feeling (Fe) energy to its external surroundings, though in a vastly different way.

Following this shift, this has become one of my strongest cognitive functions, and is a function I can now wield effortlessly, and even elevate to a dominant position in my cognitive stack when necessary, despite normally being a blind spot for my type. The same goes for my introverted thinking (Ti) function which I've carefully worked on developing for the last 8 or so years.

These two functions are now more or less on par with my extroverted thinking (Te) secondary function, and all 3 of them can and has been elevated to a dominant (1st slot) position under very specific circumstances. Most of the time however, these 3 functions play a supporting role in elevating my introverted intuition (Ni) to new heights.

Following my very sudden and rapid growth in Fe, my introverted feeling (Fi) has now taken a backseat role, becoming a blind-spot in my cognition. A function I no longer see as valuable. One that actively limits and slows down my Fe, Ti and Te.

Edited January 3 by Fearey

[Fearey]

2025-01-03 20:00 GMT

I have gone in and out of clear light more times than I can count following my last post in November.

This has simultaneously been the most freeing and developmentally enhancing period of my life, and also the most emotionally taxing. This due to a very close and personal relationship, the one that prompted this growth to begin with. I came to realize that I accidentally overwhelmed this extroverted feeling (Fe) dominant person with the level of Fe energy I was radiating onto them through my constant care and nurturing of them and their needs. This eventually became too much for this person to handle, resulting in a mental breakdown. In hindsight, likely due to feelings of being unable to keep up themselves, even if that was never my intent.

Edited January 3 by Fearey

[Fearey]

2025-03-15 22:22 GMT

It's now been 2 weeks since I retook the IPIP-300, a big 5 personality assessment commonly used in psychology as an attempt to map the extreme personal transition I've undergone for the last few months. Something impossible happened, I had been an INTJ for my entire life. Then the most emotionally violent, destructive few weeks of my life completely reshaped my cognition to that of an INFJ, where my Fe presence became so strong that it unconsciously overpowers Fe dominant types (ENFJ, ESFJ), and sends them into existential crisis.

The big 5 test results gave me cognitive dissonance, and I was stuck in confusion for several days. I know I'm an Ni dominant, yet somehow my scores should not be possible for an INFJ, despite me knowing with full certainty that this is my type, based on my cognitive preferences. My enneagram had also changed from having been 5w4 for the last 10+ years, to 8w7.

Openness to experience: 90th percentile
Conscientiousness: 99th percentile
Extroversion: 96th percentile
Agreeableness: 36th percentile
Neuroticism: 0th percentile

https://www.personalityassessor.com/ipip300/results=1657068-832219/

Edited March 15 by Fearey

[Fearey]

2025-03-15 22:43 GMT

I feel like my skyrocketing extroversion may be a direct result of a near complete absence of neuroticism, which may be the reason why I never get overwhelmed or drained socially, or second-guess myself in front of others, no matter the size of the gathering.

Edited March 15 by Fearey