Marc Schinkel

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About Marc Schinkel

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  • Birthday 10/12/1993

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  1. Hey @Iiris , I love checking your journal from time to time. Your posts are waaaaay too cool to be coming from someone your age. I really want to go see this movie the next time I am in a town with a cinema, hopefully next week some time! Did you know that Elton John was inspired to write Crocodile Rock after he heard this song from an Australian Band? There is a tradition here, whenever this song is played in a bar everybody pulls down their pants to their ankles and hops around in circles flapping their wings. It's very fun. You could try next time you are home alone
  2. existance = non-existence
  3. Ikr, I swear I realized all this while taking a piss in high school one day.
  4. Actually there is no existence. There is only non-existence. Non-existence is an Absolute with no opposite. Existence is an image within non-existence. Which means existence exists (but only as an image). This is a very twisted mindfuck. The problem is that you are mistaking an image of existence for actual existence, which doesn't exist! Look at how you twist yourself into pretzels, all to create the illusion existence. LOL It's pure genius! You are a genius bullshitter
  5. You would love this film.
  6. Nothing happens in the jungle without my knowledge. We are one.
  7. This is AMAZING dude, well done! You are on the right track with this. It will only get easier and easier exponentially. Soon it will seem funny that you got so triggered over such small things. I know because I used to be the same. It could be helpful for you to realise that most girls these days are probably more anxious than you even if they're talking more and seem more comfortable socially. This is because they're more vulnerable and because (generally) more of their self esteem comes from social interactions. She was probably so pissed you didn't ask her name! It can also really help to give as much attention to others as you can in a social situation. As Jordan Peterson says, people love being paid attention to, because it hardly ever happens and if you are focusing on them you aren't focusing on yourself and fucking everything up.
  8. Woah, I don't really know what the particulars of your states were, sounds deep though Can you only express when it's intense, leading to outbursts? Dance more then!
  9. Oh, I get it a bit more clearly now. Cool insight. I also need to integrate my two centres at this stage. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply that you don't feel, in fact it's very obvious that you have a powerful vulnerability/sensitivity operating in the background, but it seems like you shield it or channel it through your mind. That's what I mean by "cerebral". I am similar, sometimes people get a bit overwhelming and I need a lot of time alone.
  10. Zen Mind, Beginners Mind I've been resting for the last few days in this small country town of Hay. I guess I'm having my first major ego backlash of the trip. I rationalised staying back here for the first few days due to bad weather and to gain some weight. I've lost somewhere in the vicinity of 5-7kg (10-15lbs) and I did NOT have that much spare weight to lose when I started. If anyone is trying to lose weight, long periods of low level aerobic exercise just melts the fat away. I can't keep my weight on despite stuffing myself every opportunity I get. I have so much respect for the marathon monks, I honestly have no idea how they are able to pull of 100 days of 30-60k walks without ending up like Christian Bale in The Machinist. Sure, they're not pushing a cart load of shit and I their pace is much slower than mine, but it's still physiologically dubious. Its difficult to balance being kind to myself and pushing myself to do things I don't want to do. I am the judge the jury and the executioner of every decision because I am out here alone, it is difficult to lead myself. I can't tell if I'm being lazy or if I genuinely need to rest. I spent the last few days with a pen and paper writing down everything that came to mind, just to get it out in front of me. I realised that I still associate a large chunk of my self worth to the goals I set out to accomplish and how successful I am at reigning them in. I don't want people to think I am lazy or weak, or poor at execution. On some level that's how I feel about myself; those are the parts of myself that I have difficulty accepting. I have felt like I wouldn't be able to progress in my life until I finished this walk because I feel like a total failure for not having done it already. It's like an open psychological loop that has been tormenting me for years, crippling my self esteem. I know, it sounds stupid to say it like that, but that's how I feel about it. My mind comes up with a million reasons why I couldn't do it before, or why stopping was the right thing to do and on and on and on ... But at the end of the day the basic calculus is did I finish. Yes / No? The answer is No, and the deeper parts of my mind won't let it be. Just got to take a deep breath, and start again. And hey, it's not a big deal. I'm doing fine. I'll get there, and there isn't other than here. The beginning is the end, is the present. Every step is the first and the last. It's like, all linked together, man.
  11. @Limbo Thanks! It means a lot to read that
  12. Almost spat out my coffee!
  13. Hey tsuki, cool videos man! I enjoy them. I thought you might find this short video helpful with regards to aligning your conscious and unconscious processes. Have you ever tried to perceive people and communicate using your instinctive (unconscious, physical) process rather than you intuitive (mental, imagistic) processes? It seems to me like you are a pretty cerebral guy and you over-exert that power at the expense of your other capacities. I'm not sure if this aligns with what you are trying to communicate, it is quite vague but interesting nonetheless. Edit: I just realized I gave a head before heart response to you
  14. Dude, is that even legal? I can see it clearly in my minds eye. The two of you walking to some secluded place. You're both wearing cute smiles and giggles, talking about squirrels and Indiana Jones. You sit her down, play a beautiful, heartfelt, soulful song, the emotion just oozes out of your pores and melts her. Then you slowly set the guitar down. ... "jj,,, what,,, what are you doing?" (She knows exactly what you're doing) You slowly rise up and walk a little off to yourself. ... "jj,,, is,,, is,,, everything alright?" (She's a little puzzled) Her voice trembles slightly. ... "why don't you come and sit back dow.." You cut her off: "IT IS TIME!" Birds take flight from the epicentre as you slowly rise off the earth .... Poor girl. I'm so happy for ya, man!