Carl-Richard

What you really should be asking is if I would be ok if she watched porn as well, which I would say yes to. There are some girls who watch a lot of porn.

Hmm yeah, maybe I mostly appreciate them from afar. I don't think I particularly want to be dominated. Maybe it's just an awe response that comes in addition to the sexual arousal, like "man, what a majestic creature", kinda like when you look up to a male figure that you respect.

I like dominant women too. Maybe because my mom is one If you think about how females are mostly attracted to masculine behavior and males mostly to feminine physical appearance, I think I appreciate a certain mix of that. It's like a black panther; beautiful, seductive and dangerous.

There are like 3 pop songs that come to mind that my gym plays regularly that I kinda like, but I don't know what they're called

Do you think the traits hyperactivity and attention deficiency exist?

Spiral Dynamics is related to other stage theories in developmental psychology like Piaget, Kohlberg, Erikson, Loevinger etc.

Different words, similar concept, just like nirvana vs. moksha.

Stagnation.

They're certain regularities of perception that you tell yourself stories about cognitively in the form of symbols, in order to construct a generalized and higher-order understanding which is pertinent to your survival.

@Danioover9000 What did you eat? ?

Ok, so you posit nothingness as your reduction base. When you do that, then by default, you no longer require an explanation for nothingness, but also in a similar vein, nothingness cannot explain anything by itself, or it's at least not a very useful explanation (e.g. "why can I not read your thoughts?" – "nothingness"). If you want your metaphysics to be able to make useful explanations for different stuff (maybe you don't), then where do you go from here?

A pragmatic post-Kuhnian understanding of science and epistemology, a biopsychosocial understanding of health, a systems understanding of physiology and neuropharmacology, a pluralistic understanding of spirituality and religion, a meta-theoretical understanding of psychology and society, and an understanding of deep ecology and holism.

You always need to start with something that cannot be explained, that cannot be reduced to something else. That applies to all metaphysics (unless you want a metaphysics that cannot explain anything).

@Raptorsin7 I guess I'm pointing out how such a task can look very ugly if you're not principled, because you'll easily adopt a hyper-idealized and dogmatic worldview which goes straight against your former self, which is how you'll end up pushing people away etc. On my path of integrating Red, I'm not going to go full "wife at home, me at work" like Greek over here. I'm fine with the modern project. For me, it's mainly about tapping into a certain energy. Maybe it will have some impact on my temperament, but I'm not going to let myself be swallowed by a completely different value system.

Meditate more.

I talked about in the other Tate thread how integrating the shadow is a tricky thing. Greekgodx is a perfect example of how when the Red shadow starts getting explored, the more repressed it is, the more violent it is.

What about doing things that are hard?

Whatever you do to act on your desires and ultimately survive, has a structure, be it going to the fridge, going to work, or having sex. When you do these things, you feel inherently fulfilled. Merely achieving the desire is just a small part of the equation, and that experience is extremely short-lived. You won't just sit and bask in it for the rest of time. You'll always return to performing actions. Ok, so that structure can be emulated symbolically in rituals (physically), or stories (metaphorically), or philosophy (theoretically), and merely engaging in these meaning-making behaviors is inherently healthy. It's because they're in fact the symbolic representation of health itself. Health is that which sustains you as an organism, and the structure of that, distilled to its essence, is what you experience as meaning.

Hahaha I'm sure all women can feel it. They just don't tell you about it ;D

And this applies strictly to sexuality, not other aspects of the relationship?

I think cheating is seen as serious because of the fear of getting dumped. However, people seem to generally want to have sex even though they also watch porn, so porn is not exactly analogous to cheating, because there is not really a danger of being dumped because of it.

Would you feel better if he told you that he feels that porn does not replace sex?

Almost, but not really, because there is a solution: to stop watching porn. A true double-bind has no possible solution, i.e. he would lose whether he gave up porn or not.

Do you feel that porn replaces sex?

Dukkha.