Viking

name experiences, feelings, everyday activities, meaning, whatever you think is the stuff that makes life worth living. for me now what makes life worth living: tv shows, genuine laughter, food, love (didnt experience it much but i have a feeling its good), genuine beauty (again, didnt experience much of it but i think if i will it will be good) and thats about it i think.

I show my appreciation out of guilt that if i wont show it they would feel bad. didnt understand that one

actually i played dark souls with a guide and it was very fun. @alankrillin wait, so what you're saying is that i shouldnt look at perspectives other than my own? i shouldnt try to discover new things? ok, so ill just sit in my room and watch tv until the end of my life, bye.

ive seen that video, but he also said in the video that you have to develop a taste for these things. i dont understand them yet. i tried to do a gratitude practice but it became hellish. for appreciating being i guess you would have to eat tons of mushrooms and have like 700 enlightenment experiences and im not in that realm of development yet.

it happens automatically, why do i need to focus on it? so you want me to just believe everybody who tells me to do something and do what he tells me to? opportunities for what? that was what the topic was about. i wanted to ask people here what they see valuable in the world because i dont see much value except the things i listed. maybe if they showed me some valuable sides of life i would also see it as valuable and i would have another thing which has value.

i guess then food and tv bring me to a place where i enjoy things.

maybe because you are stuck in negative thinking, like i am, and dont have much positive meaning in life. happiness is not just about presence, i think. there is a book that bases itself on psychological research that acknowledges spirituality and buddhism that says that happiness is not just about the inner world, but is also about the outer, which is in Leo's booklist, its called "the happiness hypothesis".

i hate contemplating my own death because it makes me bored and i get all tangled up in my own mind. though the other 2 things are interesting. what do you mean by "sitting" in different places? also why should i sit? and why should i focus on my breath? for what reason? oh thats a good point

yeah i try to figure out myself all the time, slowly im understanding myself more. my ego likes to hear that

can you be more clear please? i didnt understand

i dont see why being makes it worthwhile. i take it for granted and i dont see why i shouldnt because i dont know anything else.

from a dualistic perspective, if one loves everyone and everything equally, he doesnt love anyone. but in spirituality theres always talk about loving everything and everyone, so my question is, is that love possible only if you understand that you ARE everyone? I dont think its possible if you still believe youre an ego

this topic made me look at life in a way i have never looked before, thanks.

I dont have any desire to grow anymore, i do that out of necessity. I dont have dreams i want to achieve. i just want to not be disturbed. sometimes i feel like i just want to stop existing (I would never consider suicide, dont worry about me) i dont want to initiate anything, i dont want to initiate conversations with people, im ok by myself, being proactive takes too much energy, i dont want to do that. i dont think im depressed, im not sad or anything either. im actually fine. im just tired, just want to do nothing. and its not that i need a break, ive had a lot of vacations, i have a scheduled relaxation time in the day, im not stressed too much. i dont know why i dont want to do anything. any ideas?

im getting tons of insights all the time, i cry, i realize stuff about myself, i see through my delusions, but i always forget, it never sticks. for example i realize that my social anxiety is caused by me wanted to get liked by others. i try to force certain behaviors, im not authentic, which makes me anxious. i realized i dont need to do anything to be liked, and deeper than that, that i need others approval to approve of myself i cried for like 20 minutes after i realized that. ok, so i realized all that yet i still find myself acting fake and unnatural. do i have to remind myself of those insights daily? do i need to figure them out over and over so they sink? i dont get it.

@NoSelfSelf thanks

oh awesome, ill definitely watch the video if leo has it, do you have any idea how it was called?

As i often post, i feel empty so i crave entertainment, connection with people, food, etc. I want to be able to more easily accept that emptiness and accept every suffering that comes. More generally, dismantle the resistance of the ego to life. Which daily meditation is best for that?

@Salvijus thanks but i hate self inquiry actually i think im not ready for it

@zambize lol dude chill im ok, i think im gonna do the awareness of thoughts meditation that was in the list you stole from nahm.

would that be effective as a 20 minute meditation? @zambize ill look into it, thanks.

what's that? also i very often get lost in thought when i do do nothing, will that go away? generally i was extremely lost in thought throughout most of my meditation sessions and ive been meditating for a year and a half already.

@Sahil Pandit @Serotoninluv @Jack River great answers, thanks.

thank you all for trying to help me, but as someone pointed out here i just need to get some friends, no need for me i think for some spiritual mumbo jumbo because it doesnt work for me right now. ill just have to wait it out while surrendering to the (sort of-) suffering and this period will pass.

@Joseph Maynor I did the life purpose course for about half a year but i came to a conclusion that i cant know for now what my passion is because im too young, i didnt experience enough of the world to have enough perspective to know what i want to do. the answers i give at the life purpose course are crap, because my identity hasnt solidified yet, i barely have any preferences and tomorrow i could decide that all my values i chose for the values exercise are a whole another set of values. ill wait a year or two or three before i engage in the life purpose course and find my passion.