Emerald

That’s the way that I understand it too. My friend Bunny identifies as non-binary, and she’s quite feminine. It’s just that the label of woman doesn’t resonate with her.

Terf stands for “Trans Exclusive Radical Feminist”… basically Feminists that are bigoted towards trans-folk. But Terfs don’t call themselves that. That’s what non-Terfs call them. They call themselves “Gender Critical” Feminists… meaning critical of gender’s existence. They believe that gender isn’t real and that no one has a gender. They believe that people only have a certain type of body. So, you have male-bodied people and female-bodied people but no gender identity. They believe that all notions of gender are 100% made up for the express purpose of oppressing women. And they have a very black and white world view where all male-bodied people are inherently predatory and all female-bodied people are inherently the victims of male-bodied people. And they view trans-women as male-bodied people who are using their trans identity to sneak around and be predatory toward female-bodied people. And trans-men are just female bodied people who have gone into denial about their victimization at the hands of male-bodied people and use the trans identity to avoid predation by male-bodied people. So, they’re very anti-man. But trans-women get the lion’s share of their ire.

I’m sure that Terfs wouldn’t like it too much. They’re the ones that are all about gender not being real. But they use that “gender isn’t real” rhetoric mostly to be shitty to trans people, so I don’t mind their outrage. But non-binary people are not Terfs. Non-binary doesn’t mean that they believe that gender doesn’t exist. Non-binary people just feel like the label of male and female doesn’t fit them accurately. They feel more comfortable in themselves by shucking those identities. They also belong to the LGBTQ community, which is a community all about embracing different intonations of human sexuality and gender. So, if there is a group (like Terfs) that believes that gender doesn’t exist, it means they’re crapping on others’ gender identities and will probably be deeply unpopular with many members of the LGBTQ community. But I personally am of the mindset that the widespread acceptance of the LGBTQ community is one of the most liberating things we have begun to achieve as a human species. Not only is it liberating for the LGBTQ community… it also liberates straight, cisgender, and gender conforming people to integrate their opposite polarities more deeply and with less shame. And this newfound fluidity with sexuality and gender will help us integrate the feminine deeper into our currently masculine principled society. But what must be understood is that every person contains a natural masculine/feminine signature. And while most people’s masculine/feminine signature skews more towards the polarity typically associated withtheir sex at birth… some will have a more equal balance of masculine/feminine in them and others will have it skew more towards the opposite polarity of the energy most typically relates to their sex assigned at birth. This masculine/feminine signature also runs along the the sexual instinct. So, you could potentially have a person who’s very gender conforming in their overall signature… but still primarily have same sex attractions. So there is nothing in what I’m saying that contradicts or invalidates these identities. In fact, the masculine and feminine in all things explains how there can be so much variety with regard the spectrums of human gender and sexuality. But some people might get upset about it because they feel I’m being heteronormative or stereotyping as I do have to paint with somewhat broad strokes to get my point across.

In case you’re genuinely interested… Et voila… But the reason why I didn’t post the other such thread is because the women on here don’t generally have an issue with masculine integration. In order for women to be interested in Leo’s content at all, she’d likely be fairly well acquainted with her masculine side… more than the average woman. But you can look on here and see that 80% of the guys on here are really struggling under the weight of feminine repression.

Yes, if you repress your masculine side, your feminine will also take a hit. The masculine and feminine are like conjoined twins. But yes…. anyone can repress either or both sides of their polarity. And the symptoms are similar for repressing a certain polarity, regardless of gender. For example, I used to repress my femininity so much. And I see a lot of my past self’s neuroses in men who are currently repressing. And for both, the solution is to find the root of the resistance and drop it. For some, the root may be core beliefs like, “If I am feminine then women won’t like me.” Or “Men are all predatory and only want one thing” Or “If I show my emotions, I am weak.” For others, the root can come from past traumas and protection mechanisms.

Well said

Just don’t encourage people to spiritually bypass their issues with integration. This issue with repression is actually taking a toll on people’s lives and psychological wellbeing. So, while it’s true that these are the relative truths of Maya… Maya problems often require Maya solutions.

Thank you

But how will the people who are repressing their feminine side come to realize it if they don’t allow themselves to take this perspective? The thing is that lots of people (especially men) are out of touch with their feminine side. And not only does this create tons of problems in their personal life… on a global scale it is responsible for everything from wealth inequality to global warming. Our suppression of the feminine is making us totally out of tune with nature. When we are disconnected with the feminine side, we become disconnected from our emotions, our bodies, and the Earth. And in order for things to get better for the individual and society alike, we must recognize the importance of integration of the feminine.

The main efficacy of knowing about feminine/masculine is subtractive… not additive. If a person is aware of the masculine and feminine, they can see more easily where their resistances are. I used to be very repressive of my feminine side. But I was also of the mindset that masculine/feminine were mere social constructs. So, I didn’t recognize my bias towards my masculine side and against my feminine side. Once I gained insight into the nature of masculine and feminine as well as the traits associated with them in an esoteric sense, I was able to recognize and drop my resistances and judgments towards the feminine. So, the efficacy is in the dropping of the blocks and resistances that people’s culturally ingrained ideas about there gender create in order to allow that which is natural in a person to be expressed regardless of feminine or masculine polarity. That said, the general effect will be that people will be in tune with their natural energies. And for most men, that means they will be mostly masculine and some feminine and vice versa for women. But we get there subtractively by allowing whatever happens to be there simply to be. We allow ourselves to come into our natural alignment when we stop resisting one side of our polarity or the other.

Masculine/Feminine is a very useful dichotomy. But at a certain point, all dichotomies collapse. It’s just like up and down. There’s not really such a thing as an absolute up or down. But that false distinction is very useful to us indeed… lest we decide to take a long walk off a short cliff. But within everything the mind could label as masculine there is the feminine, and within everything the mind could label as feminine, there is the masculine. They are two sides to one coin.

The thing to understand is that Leo’s feminine side is just as much of a woman as I am. Functionally, a man is part woman. And you can tell a lot about the relationship a man has to his inner woman by his feelings and attitudes toward women in general. So women who understand this truth can usually tell when a man has issues with his feminine side and to what degree because that man will be reacting to the inner-woman the same way that he behaves towards women in general. As within, so without. It’s very obvious when a man has issues with his feminine side.

Thank you ? If a woman suppresses her masculine side, there is a dualism that springs about. The dualism denotes disintegrated masculine in the sense of lack of Divine Masculine and the Shadow Masculine taking a possessing role. The same dualism is true for men who repress the feminine. They tend to express Shadow Feminine qualities such as bitterness and pettiness as well as a lack of Divine Feminine qualities like social acuity and emotional intelligence. So, for women with no integration of the masculine… On one hand, with the Lack of Divine Masculine, she might become whiny, fretful, vague, flaky, emotional overwhelm, directionless, and passive. And overall she’ll be overwhelmed by details and will not be able to see the big picture. On the other hand, when the Shadow Masculine is possessive she can become irritable, domineering, controlling, smothering, high maintenance, and passive aggressive. The thing that’s lacked of Divine Masculine is objectivity and emotional distance. When a woman is disintegrated from the masculine her emotions overwhelm her and she either succumbs to vagueness or to hyper-protective harshness. And this lack of distance makes it difficult for her to be in touch with her emotions without getting overwhelmed and it prevents her from being receptive and intuitive. And either way she becomes quite stiff.

With regard to Leo, he’s a mixed bag. But I’d have to say that he leans more towards disintegration of the feminine than toward feminine integration. He’s just a bit hung up on the masculine. But I can see that he’s done some work in that area and he theoretically understands the value of integrating the feminine as a man. But overall, I would say that his audience is a bit of a mirror of where he’s at in his relationship to his feminine side.

The men who are the most hung up on being masculine tend to be the most repressive of their feminine side. And this puts them out of alignment with their masculine power. I’m not trying to be unkind. but having read your posts, you are in the group of forum members that sprung to mind while I was writing this post.

Thank you! ?

It’s not subjective. The biggest distortion that occurs on this forum is repression of the feminine side. You can tell if you take a peek at the dating/relationship section. You may not recognize it when you see it, so I’ll mention some symptoms of feminine repression below. And you’ll notice many of these popping up on the forum. Intellectualization Spiritual bypassing Ineffectiveness in birthing an idea into reality Lack of emotional intelligence The mind is seen as superior to the heart, which creates a lack of clarity and non-directionality Decisions are made from a place of pain avoidance or abstract “shoulds” and “should nots” All things can be rationalized- devil’s advocate Difficulties with women Misogyny and bitterness Trying to escape reality Anti-Earthiness Valuing the ideal over the real Coldness Competition to prove one’s worth Lots of judgment around holding up a certain standard of masculinity Men policing each other’s masculinity Seeing social isolation as a virtue Macho posturing - aping masculinity Prickliness

Thank you for recommending my channel!

Great analogy. Lots of people nowadays (especially men but women too) lack integration of the feminine and end up ungrounded and disconnected from reality… and from their emotions. Without the feminine, we’re all a bunch of balloons filled with nothing but hot air.

No, it’s not that extreme. The leaning back that women can do is far more subtle. But the pick up strategies you mentioned might work because they get a guy to shift into his feminine so that women shift into masculine pursuer mode. So, the polarity flips and still creates attraction. And that way, she pursues him and not the other way around. And this gets him access to easy sex because he has the feminine magnetism working for him. An example of a man using feminine energy to get women would be someone like Dan Bilzerian who uses feminine energy and being to get lots of sex with women. He just cultivates a social circle (also feminine) where there are more women around than men. And this creates an environment where women shift into their masculine pursuer mode to get male attention just because there’s more competition. But most women won’t really be satisfied when they’re in masculine pursuer mode. They’ll just get hooked on the man in his feminine being mode and run themselves into the ground… all while not arousing the deeper drive for love and commitment in the man. But if the woman remains in her feminine power and leans back a little, she creates a space for the man to pursue. And this creates the feminine magnetism. If a woman leans forward into her masculine pursuer mode, it will repel men who are in their masculine pursuer mode and she’ll get attention from low investment men who are fine with hanging out for a bit and having sex… but won’t invest any deeper than that.

? Thank you!

I feel like this would be bad psychologically for you in particular. I’m sure there are people who feel okay with sex work. But I get the sense that this decision would be made from a place that hurts you. You may end up feeling very objectified and it might aggravate your self-esteem issues.

I don’t think that’s transphobic because it relates to other factors than them being trans. My assumption of transphobia would only come if someone was really hellbent on expressing a disinterest in trans-people. It’s not the disinterest in itself because that can come up with regard to factors of compatibility. It’s just sort of a feeling I get when people go out of their way to express sexual disinterest in trans-people that I’d assume that. But for me, having more kids with a future partner is also something that I wouldn’t want to take completely off the table until I’m past 35. I probably won’t have any more children. And I’m truly okay if I don’t. But I also wouldn’t want to take the option off the table quite yet. So, I might also be hesitant to start a relationship with a trans man for that reason. Yet again, dating a trans man or infertile man might save me from the ambivalence and my tendency to toggle between baby fever and the “my womb is retired” mindset. Part of me is like “Yeehaw… empty nesting with two adult children at age 43!” The other part of me is like “Awww… babies.” So, I’m going to imagine that my choice in partner would likely nudge me out of my ambivalence in one direction or the other.

An insight that I had at a recent plant medicine ceremony was that, underneath everything (even the most bitter hatred and prejudice) that all human beings longed to love and receive love from each other. There was a desire to be a human family. And it contextualized a lot of things for me. I could see that men really wanted to love and be loved by women… which I’ve had my doubts for obvious reasons. And that it’s the desire for love but feeling deeply unlovable that’s led to this culture of objectification and bitterness towards women. So, men emphasize the aspects of their own sexuality that make them feel more in control and less vulnerable. And they try to pretend that the desire to love and be loved isn’t there… perhaps to the point that they fool themselves. Basically it’s a certain type of avoidance strategy that keeps them detached in order to avoid the vulnerability of loving a woman. And it was clear that most men are playing out some form of this avoidance pattern… in varying degrees. Some very extreme and others more mild.