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@Pablo Neirotti Good stuff from Rito. I noticed this part in your Op in particular It seems like the large part of "concentrating on a task" is not actually doing the task but figuring out how to do the task. Like figuring out what to write. Try to first figure out exactly how to do the task before actually doing it. In this way, any interruptions during the figuring is not interrupting the task since you have not yet engaged in it. And if interrupted while doing the task, won't upset you because you know where and how to continue with the task afterwards.

This may not be related to OP, but it reminded me of a poem given to me many years ago. It was written in 1934.

Have faith that you are and will be okay regardless of what goes down. Faith destroys the fear of doubt.

Depends on your reference point and belief in the affirmation. Also, an affirmation without action may never eventuate. Words have a lot of meanings for a person. Using the wrong words, for an affirmation, could actually backfire. Example; If your affirmation is "I want to be healthy and fit", then your reference point and belief is that you are unhealthy and unfit. As long as you use that particular affirmation you may actually stay unwell. An affirmation which will make it hard on yourself to change: "I no longer smoke". Your reference point and belief is that you once smoked. It was a copying strategy that worked. So when you are looking for a way to cope, your mind will remind you that you once smoked and that worked. Good affirmations focus in the NOW. They do not refer to your past. Example: Whenever the urge to have a smoke arises, the affirmation would be (said with absolute conviction) "I don't even smoke! Why would I want a smoke!?" The mind will sense an error and quickly cancel the urge for a smoke. This sort of affirmation can change a person very quickly, such as three weeks, to never having an urge for a smoke. Side Note: For most people it takes 90 days (3 months), doing the new behaviour daily, before it becomes not only automatic but you will miss it if you don't do it.

@Roxane Thanks for your resources. I have looked at them but I still like to eat small portions of fish and other meats. Though I have increased my proportions of veg and starches.

The ideal is both (1) and (2). In that way, when you are with family and friends, life is good. Then when you find yourself alone, life is good also.

Why not try introspection. Pick a single word to explore (to find the truth of the matter) which may be related to your self. Example, sitting with the word "doubt". For at least 30 minutes, sit with that single word and find what it really truly is. Go beyond what your mind will initially define. Go beyond your doubts about the word 'doubt'. Go beyond self ridicule for seeking out the truth about 'doubt'. Even sit with the silence of surrendering to 'doubt', for that is when revelations awaken you. This can be a way to awakening, one word at a time.

Hello Leo. I studied psychology for three years, as a subject, to gain a degree in counselling. Psychology is very interesting for newcomers, but it lacks in certain areas. Firstly, it is under the umbrella of philosophy, and as such philosophy is not looked at very much. If I were you, I would study philosophy (as a hobby) while studying psychology. That is what I done and it helped me a great deal. Philosophy gives psychology more depth in regards to what a person is. Spirituality goes even deeper than philosophy (phi) or psychology (psi). However, without phi and psy, spirituality tends to float away from the human, and become unrelated in many ways. Whereas with phi and psy, spirituality becomes more related to the human. Because of this, spirituality becomes more responsible and governed by the individual rather than by outside influences. The truth (phi) and love (psy) side of spirituality becomes dominant. After gaining my degree in counselling, my truth seeking shifted from outside of me to inside of me. Self-honesty and dealing with all my fears became the cornerstone of my spiritual growth. Since then, I found that the practice of psychology and counselling is only skin deep. Spirituality helps to understand the core issues.

@Outer @Roxane Thank you for your interesting input. It has helped me to tweak my food intake. By the way, my body is now used to eating much less than it used to. It does not scream for food just because its time to eat. I eat much healthier foods and I eat without distractions, and enjoy smaller mouth-fulls. I take my time to enjoy the flavour and aroma of what I am eating. It's all new for me and I enjoy it. Also feeling much better within my body. Thanks again.

People are either fearful or loving at any particular moment. When we fear, we are unaware of the (deeper) truth of what we fear. This is normal, because hardly anybody is enlightened (not ignorant). When we love, we are aware of the truth of what we love. This is not so normal, because hardly anybody is unconditional (totally selfless). In other words, human beings are more fearful than loving (unconditionally). By knowing our own truth, through continuous self-honesty, we can discern the truth of others. We become attuned to what is true (loving) or untrue (fearful). We also see ourselves in others, and see similarities with our own fears (past or still present). In that similarity we understand and have empathy. We also understand that people need to find their own truth to understand what they have been untrue (ignorant/denial/fearful) about. Live and let live has its place until input is asked for.

@faith, you mentioned you have bad habits. You know that they are bad, and so that is not your ideal self (unless you want to be bad). If you want to improve, ditching a bad habit would be an obvious choice. If nothing changes, nothing changes.

@Principium Nexus Be honest, even if you fear losing the relationship. I know that maybe is not what you wanted to read. But I am just being honest.

Yeah, that does seem logical, but many people find themselves in situations where being 'as they are' does not fit their ideal self. They are not happy with themselves 'as they are'. So they try to reach their concept on an ideal-self. The strange thing about this is that once they get there, their ideal-self advances. There is no end to improvement. We all have an ideal-self. The ideal is what motivates us to change. For most in this forum, their ideal self is to be self-actualized. Where most others have an ideal self which is enough to just fit in, or be approved, by their peers (whatever that may be). So to 'fit in' has become their ideal, which is not 'as they are' but 'as others are'. I've been there and done that many times. The social part of existence is full of sub-cultures. Even this forum is a sub-culture of sorts. Sub-cultures are almost impossible to escape from if you wish to hang around like-minded people. The sassy ones, seem to me, to be those that wish to be seen on top, or too challenging, amongst their peers. They fear being seen as mediocre, or the underling.

Seems like there is no self-improvement in staying with the present task in hand. Performance results meets expectations when the processes of reaching those results are met, or performed. So try and just focus at one step at a time. One sale at a time. After all, that is what the boss is paying you to do, to perform the process correctly each time you go through it. Don't let yourself get distracted, like feeling bored, or looking forward to doing something else. Self-improvement requires a lot of practice, everyday we practice improving our ability to remain calm, tolerant, patient, forgiving, allowing, letting go of our fears, accepting what does not go our way, focus on the job at hand. All this brings a person to maximum efficiency. Though the world, these days, seems to care more about speed rather than efficiency. It may be better for us to find employers who care more about efficiency than the appearance of speed. Speed may be the culprit which pushes one to become inefficient.

From what you described, it sounds like self-promotion. Without it, they may see themselves as nothing special. If so, then they may try and make out that nothing else is special except themselves.

@poimandres Sorry poimandres, I meant to click on PetarKa '@ User' button. Nevertheless, my point was that he may wish to do nothing, but life is the result of one moment to the next regardless if you did nothing. Generally, if nothing changes, nothing changes, but that is not so because we do get older. But by ceasing the concept of time in yourself, there is a chance that another concept of time, and/or life, may be revealed. Such as a life of timelessness. Some call the Spirit life as a life of eternity. In other words, while thinking about self, and this world, we become slaves to the concept of time 'ticking away'. By ceasing/pausing the train of thought, we effectively pause time, and then a knowing happens which cannot be explained by reasoning (a time process). It just is. And that IS, is as definite as a truth is. It cannot be broken down like the concept of time can. So while we are alive in this world, we might as well play with this concept of time. Play with it to create something, like making a sandwich to eat for lunch. Or just sit still and try and stop breathing. While we are alive, time is difficult to escape from, so we might as well play with it while we can.

@Ilya Meditation can be used for avoiding the truth or exposing it. The enlightened, by definition, are no longer stuck in ignorance. That is, they know the truth. To meditate, or practice introspection, to reveal your own core truths requires facing ALL your fears about self and its association with the world you walk through. It's not about relaxing to feel good, it is about relaxing to be vulnerable and exposed (as contradictory as that sounds). That is why the word 'faith' is often used to explain that contradiction. To come across an enlightened person is like finding a diamond in the rough. It's rare.

@poimandres 'Life' is living one moment after another. Otherwise 'life' as we know it ceases. Then again, it is this ceasing (like in meditation) which reveals other than the 'life we live'.

@Dan Arnautu Since he is prone to mood swings, there is nothing on this thread to suggest that it will stop. Alcohol maybe to culprit, The Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde symptoms is common with drinking too much alcohol. Or he may be suffering from Bipolar disorder. Just to let you know that these two possibilities maybe something for you to consider if your father shows no overall change. Also, some father do have difficulty taking guidance from their son. Many think it should be the other way around. My father was like this, but later took on those suggestions. However, I do have a concern for you Dan. Just as a reminder, taking care of your father is one thing, but taking responsibility for him is not a good idea. So while taking care of him remind yourself that if he goes against what you feel is best, he is making the choices for his direction in life. As hard as that may sound, you must also look after yourself. Many people in this caring position quickly learn that tough-love is not only tough on the father, but also tough on the son. The tough bit is the truth of the matter. But in most cases it works out best overall. Your a good son. He is lucky to have you.

@Siim Land Okay, I'll give that a go.

@Dan Arnautu Many depressive drunks, at times, talk in a depressive way. I used to be one. My motto at the time was "poor me, poor me, pour me a drink". I used it as justification for getting drunk. After all he did admit to this by saying " I would at least mention to him that he is still okay (a loving and supporting father when he is off the drink), well I don't know him, but from what you say it points to that. If you get a chance to talk with him in a non threatening way, find out if he actually has a 'plan' for committing suicide. If so, I would be very concerned. In Australia, and in my ex-profession as a counsellor, if a client had a definite plan, it would be my duty to tell the client that I have to call the mental health team and get them to have a chat with that person. Surprisingly, nearly every one of my clients, probably for the first time, realized that what they were planning to do was very serious. They became willing to be consulted by the team. The team are specialists in helping people to circumvent their suicidal tendencies. Also, if your father has already attempted suicide in the past, then that is also a major concern, because he will have less fear of dying. If you are having difficulty dealing with this, I would advise talking with a mental health team, or those trained for attempted suicide, to get help for both you and your father.

The deeper you go the fears that have been categorized as "I don't want to know" become more apparent. As one goes deeper, uncovering the veils of denial, the most covered are becoming apparent. Secrets long forgotten will no longer be forgotten. And the ego senses threat of losing self-esteem. It gets sensitive to what may shortly arise (anxieties). Fear of how people looking at you, doubting you, are examples of the fear of being judged. This primary fear passed its fears to the fear of rejection, segregation, abandonment and annihilation. The best, permanent, way to overcome this fear of judgment is to truly know yourself (self-honesty to your core). That way you then no longer need to be afraid of being found-out, exposed, and/or vulnerable to the unknown judgments of others. The AA 12 step program has a few steps which works wonders for eradicating fears. Read about steps 4, 5, 9 and 10. There are other approaches for clearing the wreckage of our past. For example, the Catholic religion has confessionals. Though you don't need to be a Catholic to use the service. Otherwise, you can try and do it yourself by doing step 4, and I highly recommend doing step 5 to get rid of any guilt and/or shame. I know this all sounds too hard. you could try sweeping those fears under the carpet of denial, but to deny it you always have to know is truth before you know what to deny. So in effect it won't go away. fear, resentment, and all the negative emotions such as anger, intolerance, impatience, and irritability will dog you. Until you clean house there will always be a good chance of getting tripped up on the carpet.

I wanted to add some felt between the clear perspex front panel and the metal console. Could not get it in a grey colour, so I bought a cream coloured felt and grey dye. Dyeing the felt worked well. I cut strips and glued them to the console edges. Bought a length of flexible LED strip and attached them around the inside edges of the console where the front panel will be attached. Bottom photos show inside the bottom left corner of the console opening. These strips can be cut (see scissor symbol in top photo) at intervals. Then wire can be soldered to join them again. In this way, the strip can follow a 90 degree bend. Now the clear perspex front panel needed to be attached. However I soon discovered that the PIR sensor does not work behind perspex, let alone glass, because the infrared heat-waves cannot penetrate it. So I had to drill a series of holes across the front of the PIR to allow the infrared waves to reach the PIR. The bottom section is the kick-plate cut from the original front panel. The original manufacturing plate was re-attached to its centre. Below shows what the finished console looks like in both the dormant and activated states. Activation occurs when somebody approaches the console. The interior lighting turns off when either there has been no movement detected for about ten seconds, or when somebody starts using the console to operate the model bridge. I am very pleased with how it turned out. I am sure the museum visitors will enjoy looking at what is involved within the console. Now that the console is finished. I can now get back to working on the model bridge display.

Recently retired. Worked for decades as a counsellor, and now revisiting my childhood interests in creativity. But having difficulty starting 'a blank canvas' so-to-speak. Then, not long ago, the local maritime museum acquired an old console for operating a local lift-span bridge. One of the museum's volunteer workers new I had done electronics in the RAAF during the 1980's. I was asked to examine the console for the possibility to have it operate a model bridge. I did so, and ended up volunteering to create a working model for the museum. My friends doubt that I can do the project alone. That I have overestimated my skills and abilities. Maybe so, but I never thought I could not do it. However, I soon discovered that there are no plans available of the bridge, or schematic drawings for the electrical wiring of the console. I had to start from scratch. I am still trying to work it all out. This project will be challenging and testing. I feel that this project will help me rediscover my childhood creativity. This will largely be a photographic journal. The reason being is that the museum's workshop is too small for the project, so it will be created in my lounge room. Photo updates will be sent to the museum's curator so that they can observe my progress. In doing so I will also upload photos into this journal. Examining the console interior. To better map the wiring of the control panel I stripped all loose wires which had exited through the console base plate. Reverse engineering is required to understand how each switch, and other parts, functioned.

@Siim Land Thank you very much Siim. Funny video. They distracted me a bit, plus the fast talking. I had to match it again to get a better grasp of all you said. Oddly enough, I do a long fast of about 14-16 hours most morning, most of my life. That is, I don't do breakfast, though everybody tells me I should start the day with a good breakfast. The trouble is I eat too much in the evening. But now I am starting to eat half doses but more regularly. So instead of 2-3 larger meals I am doing 5 smaller meals. Starting to eat from 10am-12noon, depending what time I get back from cycling. I cycle nearly every second day for 40-60 kms, from 7am-9am, then have a chat with friends at the cafe. I don't drink coffee like I used to, but have a hot cup of water instead. I actually like it. Last week I found that if I cut my open sandwich in smaller pieces, cutting a piece each time I want to eat more, it slows my eating and I appreciate the food more. My half dose actually fills me by doing it this way. I think it's because satiation kicks in by the time I finish the dose. Thanks again for your help.