dorg

Being aware of resistance or reaction, and if resistance or reaction happen, to not resist or react to that.

You are watching the wrong video or reading the wrong book for your stage of the journey. I have found diminished interest in 'entertainment' videos and books.

You just notice, be aware, that you are judging. That is enough. Being aware of it is enough. You judge in order to give the ego (who you think you are) some drama to feed on. Judging isn't good or bad. That is just more judging.

I notice that being authentic is being as I am moment to moment, which means that whatever is going on, I am that. Another way of relating this is that I am not splitting that into me and other, and I am finding that quite wonderful. At present that involves actively resisting the temptation to succumb to old conditioning such as specific fears and anxiety that split me into a fearful state and what is feared - and I am not involved in that as I see this would involve me in a split, or as you say becoming unconscious or not aware. That does not mean that nothing is done to ameliorate fear/anxiety, but rather, whether there is fear/anxiety or not, there is no resistance to any action, non-action or resistance that is that in any particular moment. PS. I could relate what my split self experiences day to day, but I do not want to go back into that and relate from that. I've experienced that. That's no fun at all. I want to relate as I am! Thank you @egoless for this thread. Writing this post has helped clarify myself. Not sure how long it will last Relating as honestly as I can.

Yes, in the sense that ego, who-you-think-you-are, would not be without personal thought. I mean, you have to (ongoingly) think you are someone somewhere in order to have an experience (and continue it) don't you. And thoughts are not meanings, they have no meaning unless meaning is taken or assigned to them by someone. Yes, they sure are. You sure can get confused if you take thoughts about yourself too seriously. And what is too serious? -To really believe that thoughts of and about yourself actually are the case. I mean, they are only intended to give you an experience, not to make you really believe them

I like what Jed McKenna said about this: There were emojis in this but did not survive the copy and paste from http://jedmckenna.createaforum.com/new-board/jed-rant-cut-to-the-chase/msg26182/#msg26182

What is conceptual in this is that you have imagined (conceptified) yourself as someone/something that can further conceptify or split itself into something asleep and something observing. This does not become conceptual as you say, it all is conceptual. Fully seeing this is the breakout you talk of. If you think you are living on earth, you are living as a concept in a concept. This is a widespread believed in concept is it not.

@Joseph Maynor how are you aware when some incredibly intricate math problem is being worked on (or is happening)? Isn't 'all of you' involved in that?

You are asking what to think/believe are you not? And you want to know this in order to extract yourself from thought/belief? How could this possibly work? Just observe how thought pulls you in to a world of belief.

You let go of it by seeing that you are not in a position where there is any fear to let go of. In order to be in a position, location or situation, you believe you are in it, don't you? Is this not the case with where you think/believe you are now, ie a human on earth? Well, just don't be (put yourself) in that (mental) position. It is as easy as that. You put yourself in a (mental) position by going into thought about it. All positions are mental ones are they not? I am not surprised. All that you do as a thought-to-be-person in a thought-to-be-world is of no help. At best it may loosen some of those thoughts about yourself that you are attached to, ie that you believe in. However if you see/understand/know that the only way that you can be anywhere is by thinking you are there and believing you are there, ie in that thought... then you obviously just take no notice of that thought, or don't think it, then there is no need for anything to be surrendered or to work out is there?

@Vladimir said: Yes, but ONLY because you believe you are someone located somewhere. Wherever you believe you are is where you are. You think this and believe it and that belief will need to be ripped off you, and dependent on how believed that belief is is related to how painful that will be. Is it any wonder that you are concerned about this. You do not have to let go, you just see that you are not actually on earth. You (awareness) are observing who-you-think-you-are in where-you-think-you-are. You have thought yourself into that earthly position, you are dreaming. Just see/observe (be aware of) this.

Pleased you have found something useful for you. If you already visualise yourself as someone somewhere doing something that you want to change, then visualisations are useful. It gets the mind moving to a different place. However if you do not priorly see yourself something like this then not much point in them other than for a self induced experience, eg, thinking/imagining (visualising) you are someone on earth. After all, don't we visualise ourself where we think we are. And yes I visualise myself where I think/imagine/visualise I am when I do, and when I don't I don't.

Funny, I can think via images or imagine via words.

@DocHoliday @Joseph Maynor thank you for your responses.

So what is authentic then? If inauthentic is gone, then does authenticity have any meaning? IOW, does the word "authentic" point to anything? Do any words actually authentically point to anything? Don't we need the inauthentic in order to refer or point to the authentic? Can they in fact be separated?

Thanks for this. And yes, I imagine that the normality and stability are provided by my insistence that it is all about me.

Yes, this is what I do in waking life.

In my experience, you get to be not so fearful, you progressively do not give in to your tensing up and in this progression you begin to see the world as not such a fearful place; you see that it 'projects back to you' what you think about it; you begin to trust more. I am now beginning to think/see (envision/understand) that really nothing can go wrong for me, as even if something 'conventionally goes wrong' that that is just a convention, a widely held view (thought/belief), and I will learn something from it, ie where I am still attached (to thought about myself). And is there actually anyone attached to thought/belief? Only if you think/believe so :).

@StephenK The ego is every perspective that you take. Every time that you think, that is the ego thinking.

You simply see that you are not the ego. Ego can be really strong but you are not it, you are not fooled by it. You are the witness, the consciousness that is aware of the ego and it's pranks. It is trying to get you involved in thought, in it's thought system; it is trying to keep you enthralled as the ego, as someone located somewhere, as who-you-think-you-are, trying to drag you back into 'the dream'.

Whatever the ego experiences, that is not you; you are not the ego. It does not look like you have separated from the ego (who you think you are) and 'taken the witness position'. By getting involved in thought you are dragged into 'the dream'. Just watch those thoughts pass by.

@LRyan Appreciated. "Everyday life issues and requirements is the trigger that pulls me away from my awareness" is just an example of a type of thought that pops up from time to time and talks about such things; just as the 'I' thought does. Nothing to be concerned about. And if a concerned thought pops up, that is just another example.... And on thought goes, or not.

It is not sufficient to just catch yourself moving into unconsciousness. You need to notice the thought pattern, the belief, that drives each of these movements. Notice that you (awareness) is not unconscious, the thought pattern, what you think you are, that is unconscious.

I see meditation and self inquiry as observation so it can be done at any time. Through observation you notice how, though your own personal thought, you have been creating a fictitious world for you to live in. You do this by going into or indulging in or dwelling in thought. For instance you say "I need to work more on observation". Observation is not work and is not something you do. It 'just happens' when you do not place yourself in any situation via thought. Also, up there^ you said: This is a good example of what I am saying. You IMAGINE (think/believe) you are someone living somewhere and then on top of that you further imagine that you have OCD. All imagined. And then you are trying to control what you have imagined (thought/believed). Can you see the nonsense of this? In actual fact you are simply over thinking your situation. Can you just sit in a quiet spot and observe this? No one anywhere is in any situation. It is all imagined. Hope this helps a little.

How about freedom as an identity. Freedom does not take sides.