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Remember the rule: You can't experience any jhana if you have pain in the body. So just drop that posture altogether. I personally can manage dullness so I literally lay down for a 5-15 mins until the pain goes away and continue the meditation like that until I increase the joy. For the sitting posture, use pillows as back support. Do the 'recline' posture where the body is straight but at a 110% sort of angle rather than a full erect and uncomfortable 90% angle. Leigh and Culadasa actually both recommend doing this posture for jhana practice. It must be alert but also not uncomfortable. This was my problem as well. In fact, for close to a year, I haven't experienced the 1st jhana simply because I've concentrated on the breath with TMI so much. I didn't think jhanas would be THIS amazing and powerful. Culadasa is always saying 'Your body and mind must be infused with joy and tranquility' Yeah, I got the tranquility but there is no joy. Well, now I understand why. His instructions on the first jhana are essential. Drop the attention on the breath. And then focus on the pleasent sensations. Don't completely throw it out. Keep the breath in awareness. So that is why awareness muscles need some extra training and this is what makes jhanas slightly challenging. Stage 5-6 must be minimum and awareness should be stable prior to attempting a jhana. Don't be afraid to drop the breath. Once I did that, jhana arised fairly quickly. But I had to smile for a while until the pleasent sensation arised. So I recommend that a lot as well. Jhana feels like taking a strong anti-depressant. It is not subtle AT ALL. I can now understand why people are addicted to anti-depressants. This is amazing stuff. I've never experienced this much meditative joy and happiness in all my meditation career. My mind is literally experiencing a dopamine rush as I'm writing this. It is kind of distracting as well. The joy becomes too overwhelming and I want to stop meditating and go talk to someone about it. This is insane. It sounds like a good level of equanimity. But joy and jhanas are different. If you are unsure, it is probably not a jhana since this is not something you can miss. It is not subtle. Jhana experiences started after my latest 4 hour mindfulness session. I had a report of it here:

So I have 2 options any given day. This is my current practice method. 1- Hardcore Spirituality Training: This is that 3-4 hour Solitary confinement training. I'll rotate between those 3 postures and maintain jhanas and high mindfulness for 4 hours. If physical pliancy occurs due to jhanas, I can always do some long SDS (like 90 - 120 mins) in those 4 hours. But I no longer force myself too much if there is too much pain. Otherwise, I can't access joyful states of mind. I also would do some insight practice like self-enquiry at the end of these sessions. But my main focus is surviving these 4-5 hours with high level of mindfulness and joy. 2- Daily Maintenance and Mindfulness in Daily Life: If I feel a lot of ego backlash, I meditate and get to the 1st jhana. This is most often a 30-60 mins sit. I do the access concentration, cultivate joy and maybe do some self-inquiry at the end. I put more emphasis on the daily cultivation of joy and mindfulness more than the formal sit. For instance, today I have used my 2nd strategy. I didn't have a lot of ego backlash but my friend was coming to my house and I only had an hour of free time so I did the daily maintenance. I got to the first jhana. Cultivated stable attention and peripheral awareness. That is what I do currently and It is a really powerful training method.

TMI - The Mind Illuminated (This is a meditation book by Culadasa. I use his techniques) SDS - Strong Determination Sits: Not physically moving in meditation for long hours. I rotate these 3 postures when I'm not doing SDS for long sessions like 4 hours: Sitting, Lying down, walking. I do normal cross-legged posture with a pillow for back support. I keep the body straight.

Congrats on your progress on TMI. Definitely keep going. I've gained so much spiritual strength yesterday that I'm still feeling the effects today. 4 hours of uninterrupted practice was INSANE and it was way more effective than 1 hour sits. I can't even imagine how a 4 hour long SDS would do if 4 hours with movement was this effective. I've experienced temporary insights earlier but I've never seriously experienced a psychedelic visual completely sober to this degree. That was 3 hours into it and looking back on it, I had to maintain mindfulness and do all this work for 3 hours to experience something like this. Psychedelic experience is definitely nothing a beginner can consistenly experience but it can be done if you do at least 3 hour+ sessions. I'm convinced that if you practice with diligence uninterruptedly and with a good technique, it can happen in a retreat-like circumstance. Doing these 4 hour sessions was fantastic. I doesn't burn you out like an SDS sit, because you have the comfort of changing movements and positions when 'hell' comes. But the length of a session is so long that you MUST maintain awareness to a high degree to combat boredom and impatience. Otherwise, you'll get sick of it and quit. I recommend this to people who struggle doing retreats or find it too expensive or doesn't have the time for it. The uninterrupted practice is an absolute recommendation for anyone who can manage such intensities. Everyone should try it at least a few times once they are skilled in the use of their techniques.

I've watched Leo's episode on 'Impermanence' today. Leo described it quite well but some of the more advanced perspectives on impermanence can be lost. Impermanence is NOT 'just' arising and passing away. That is the western bastardization of what impermanence is. This is a partial truth. That is coming closer to impermanence. Impermanence as a highly developed spiritual insight is the realization that 'there is only process'. There is no arising and passing away. That is a mind made construction. All fluctuations of consciousness are a mental construction. Impermanence as a developed insight is highly interlinked with emptiness. So the perception that there are sensations which you observe to arise and pass away is a semi-matured insight. The self there is not experienced as impermanent. There are still sensations and a sense of perception. You want to come to a point where, for instance, the emotion of sadness can be experienced not just as 'arising and passing away' but also as a 'process of mental construction' where there is no fluctuation of sadness. You experience this with a 'cessation event' where the mind no longer projects mentally constructed objects (emotions, thoughts, external information of senses) into sensory experience. That 'impermanent process' is seen as a mental construction. Feeling sad and depressed because you experience arising and passing away of formations is not quite where you want to end up. That 'melancholy' and 'aware' as Leo talked about is just another mental reaction due to craving and clinging. You actually want to experience the mental reaction of sadness and depression as a constructed process as well. And then you want to understand the following thing: The arising occurs the instant of passing. The passing occurs the instance of arising. This is not occurring in time and space. You can not experience impermanence on this level and depth if you are still observing sensations to, 1- arise 2 - have a period of existence 3 - pass away. This is the training instructions but not the impermanence itself as a developed insight. You want to get to that timeless state of consciousness where arising and passing away is seen as a mental formation, process and devoid of having any self-existing nature in space and time. That is true impermanence as a spiritual insight and your ability to get in contact with this in daily life shows your level of embodiment.

Well, I meant that since you don't do formal sessions nowadays, I recommend doing it for you. You do tell people to meditate hardcore. I wasn't criticizing that. In fact, I wasn't criticizing at all. Just giving some friendly advice. I kind of understand why you are not really interested in formal disciplined sessions. But they still have a lot of benefit in my opinion. This might also create cognitive dissonance where you tell people the importance of deliberate formal practice but don't really do it yourself daily. Just to remind everybody, 60-70 year old Zen Masters still have a daily formal practice even if they don't quite need the formal sits to experience deep states of meditation because of their skills. And this is not due to some mindless habit. It is because this path (both the insight recognition and embodiment) goes forever. There is always more to be conscious of and embody.

Great! I wanted to write this because this video wasn't entitled 'Part 1' so I didn't think there would be a follow up anytime soon. I'm looking forward to it.

This is most likely experienced through meditation and psychedelics but Leo already suggests doing all of these practices. I also suggest meditation and psychedelics. I have many forum posts here explaining techniques to do it. But it is true that Leo might give the impression that this is easy to experience for most people. He actually recommends psychedelics so that the insight process is faster and easier. Now, to experience these in meditation consistently is another matter. It requires disciplined formal practice which Leo no longer seems to subscribe to. I understand Leo but I still recommend him to practice formal sessions and embody the present moment more systematically.

Hey Leo! I'm really curious how your practice is going. Especially, - What specific practices and techniques do you do daily? Both in formal and informal sessions? - For how long do you practice on average per day? - What are some of your roadblocks in your spiritual development? What are the challenges you are trying to overcome these days? - What are some of the positive effects this practice is creating in your life and spiritual development?

This time I wanted to do something different. Many people enjoy listening to music. I've observed that some people on this forum are also musicians themselves so I wanted to share my own piano performance and teach you guys how to listen and meditate deeply at the same time. If you are a TMI meditator, I'll also make a slight alteration and teach you how to combine it with TMI as well. Here is my piano performance: Aside from piano, business, psychology and meditation, I play video games in my spare time. I've purposefully played a relatively easy and slow 'new age' piece from a great JRPG called Ni No Kuni. The reason is that these sort of pieces have well defined and clear phrase structures which means we can use it as a training material for our music meditation. Here is the technique: 1- Close your eyes. 2- Put your attention on the ending of every clear phrase structure. (Find that longer pause that arises every 4-5 notes or so) 3- Once you are comfortable with that, now clarify the attentional skill further by clearly experiencing EVERY note (regardless of how fast or slow it arises) before the next one comes up. This is not that easy. The mind won't initially enjoy this way of experiencing music. It tends to listen with phrase structures, not with individual notes. 4- Now maintain this level of attentional depth and open your eyes. See if you can combine the sight and sound in a relaxed manner. Your concentration object is the sound of individual notes. By adding the visual component, I want you to relax a little bit and find some balance with visual awareness. Don't lose the clarity of attention but also take in more sensory information with visuals. Relax the whole body. 5- Finally add the body component with awareness. Attention is on the sounds. Awareness is on both the visuals and the body. Try to feel the whole body as the clearly as you can while listening with the same attentional stability. In this state of consciousness, there is no longer any conscious bandwidth for thoughts. If there is monkey mind, go back to step 2 and try again. Give yourself more time and practice. 6- Takes this music on loop, have an alarm clock and continue to meditate with step 5 for an hour (or however long you want to meditate) The technique alteration for TMI practitioners: It is the same with the regular instructions above but you stabilize attention not to the sounds, but to the breath. Do your usual breath meditation but this time bring your highly developed extrospective awareness to the sounds while maintaining clear attention to the breath. After this, bring the awareness to the whole body and visuals as instructed. All the other steps are the same. That's it. Try it and let me know if it makes your more conscious. The more you do it, the more effective this will become.

The following article is directly taken from Culadasa's Dharma website. Since it is already precise and well-written, it is faster for me to just copy-paste it. All credits go to him. Enjoy! My Brief Commentary: Keep in mind that subtle dullness is a very important phenomenon you MUST understand prior to mastering samadhi. It is one of the harder roadblocks to transcend to embody greater mindfulness that leads to insights like no-self and awakening. Your understanding of how subtle dullness arises and how to experientially deal with it in meditation is essential for progression into higher stages of mindfulness. Until mastering this with stable attention and strong peripheral, consider yourself a beginner on this path. ---------------------- On Mindful Awareness vs Dullness We all know what it is like to be asleep. And most of us have had the experience at one time or another of greatly heightened awareness and alertness, such that time seems to slow down, and there is an extreme vividness and intensity to all of our sensory perceptions. This latter experience may have been accompanied by a sense of being purely a detached observer, just watching one’s own body and mind react and respond to the situation at hand. These two states define and clearly illustrate for us the range of alertness and awareness that we are each inherently capable of. The level of awareness during ordinary waking consciousness lies somewhere near the middle between these two extremes, tending in the direction of one extreme as a result of fatigue or illness or intoxication, and towards the other in times of great excitement or danger. To use the analogy of the tachometer in a car, the engine speed of the mind is normally in its middle range where the energy is in balance with performance demands made upon it. Vividness, intensity, and clarity of awareness are the manifestation of sati, of full-minded, fully conscious awareness, and the level of sati depends upon the ‘energy level’ of the mind. As the energy level of the mind diminishes, sati decreases and full-minded awareness changes to dullness. Early on in meditation practice, samatha practice especially but this happens in almost every type of meditation practice, we encounter a decrease in intensity of awareness to a level below that which characterizes the ordinary waking state. Manifesting as sleepiness, grogginess, dreaminess, this is what I call strong dullness to differentiate it from the much milder form of diminished mental energy that I call subtle dullness. I consider it to be very important to distinguish between strong and subtle dullness, because I find that otherwise many meditators will not recognize the presence of subtle dullness. So how does a meditator evaluate the level of sati that is present? She learns to recognize the different degrees of sati and dullness primarily through noticing when it has changed. When a meditator perceives the sensations of the breath with approximately the same vividness and intensity that normally characterizes tactile sensations in her daily life, she has not yet developed greater sati, but neither has she slipped into dullness. When she experiences an increased acuity of perception, as when she can see the end points of the in- and out-breaths and the pauses between with great clarity, sati has increased. The distorted perception of the sensations of the breath that accompany drowsiness are obvious dullness. Subtle dullness, though, is more difficult to recognize. A meditator in a stable state of subtle dullness will be enjoying stability of attention and good concentration. They will most likely even experience their perception of the meditation object as very clear, and thus mistake subtle dullness for increased sati. But if there is a sudden sound, as when another meditator coughs or sneezes, or some other such disturbance, two things will happen. They will feel startled and will often jerk upright, and if they are observant, they will also notice that their awareness of the meditation object is immediately sharper and clearer than it was a few moments before. It is important to notice this difference, because by noticing it one learns to distinguish between the pseudo clarity of subtle dullness and true sati. As a meditator increases in sati, it becomes more and more difficult to startle her. So why does a state of subtle dullness seem so clear, how can it be mistaken for sati? First lets look at the ‘ordinary’ level of awareness. The attention is usually moving rapidly from object to object and we are usually attending to multiple objects at once. When it is off the meditation object for long enough, then we know that the attention has shifted. When it is away more briefly and less frequently, it seems more as though we are just aware of several things at the same time. But these brief wanderings that allow us to be aware of several things at the same time are a scattering of attention that still diminishes the vividness and intensity of the primary object of attention. Now lets look at subtle dullness. As the energy level of the mind falls, the attention does not move as much, and that, of course, gives us the experience of greater stability of attention to the meditation object. It also gives us a sense of greater clarity due to less scattering of attention. But as the energy level of the mind falls, there are also many more non-perceiving moments of consciousness, more gaps in flow of the stream of consciousness than before. Thus, when the meditator is startled and the energy level of the mind jumps up a notch, there is immediately an increased acuity of awareness! This is the tip-off to the presence of subtle dullness. The wise meditator can take good advantage of these ‘startling’ disturbances in learning to distinguish sati from subtle dullness. For this reason, I recommend that meditators do not go to great lengths to create an ultra-quiet environment for meditation, do leave the telephone plugged in while you meditate, do meditate in groups that can provide the occasional cough, sneeze or snore. It can also be very helpful to meditate while going to sleep at night, and to observe the transition from wakeful alertness, through subtle dullness, strong dullness and then sleep, a transition that can occur either quickly or slowly. Learning about mindful awareness vs dullness is only one of many benefits to be derived from meditating while going to sleep (and immediately upon waking, and there are some special features to these two meditations that are a topic for another time). But anyone can benefit from simply observing the mind while observing the breath while going to sleep. Sati is increased simply by intending to be more acutely aware, and by providing the mind with perceptual challenges that require an increased level of awareness to accomplish. (Noting practice in Vipassana is an example of just such a challenge, as is following the breath with increasing attention to detail in samatha practice.) But increasing the energy level of the mind also has the effect of increasing the rate of movement of attention from object to object, so in that sense increasing sati will also decrease the stability of attention unless the meditator has achieved a skill level of directed and sustained attention sufficient to remain focused at an increased level of mental energy. For this reason, it is best for a meditator not to worry about subtle dullness at all until they have overcome mind-wandering, gross distraction, and strong dullness. Permitting some subtle dullness is helpful in overcoming mind-wandering and gross distraction in the earlier stages. There is, in fact, a delicate balancing act between increasing sati and increasing attentional stability. They must increase in tandem with each other, otherwise one goes either too far in the direction of either agitation or dullness. But once the meditator has overcome both mind-wandering and gross distraction, it is of paramount importance that she work to overcome subtle dullness. Subtle dullness will almost certainly be present at this stage because it will have been part of the means by which this stage of attentional stability has been achieved. Dullness is relative, of course, and the meditator has already cultivated some increased sati in previous stages of practice, but what we are concerned with here is any state in which the level of awareness and the energy level of the mind is definitely less than what she is capable of while sustaining this degree of concentration, and most especially we are concerned with any tendency for it to further decrease. She must learn to achieve and then to sustain this degree of attentional stability with no decrease in mindful awareness. Then she must learn to further increase mindful awareness. The latter is actually much easier than the former. Once the mind can stabilize without increasing subtle dullness, sati can be readily increased. Before I leave this topic I also want to point out that sati ordinarily has two different aspects or ‘faces’, depending upon how it is directed. We have mostly been addressing full-minded awareness as directed towards the meditation object here, but introspective awareness, or sati-sampajanna, is that same full-minded awareness directed at knowing exactly what you are doing and why you are doing it in the present moment. This aspect of sati is only present with higher levels of alertness, and that is why there is the sense of ‘awakening’ in that moment when one realizes that their mind has wandered, and also that feeling of alertness that comes with ‘checking in’ during meditation to see what kinds of distraction or dullness might be present. At the beginning of this article I called attention to naturally occuring instances of powerful sati, of greatly heightened alertness and awareness that most of us have experienced at one time or another, typically in times of emergency. You might recall my mention of the fact that this is often accompanied by a sense of being purely a detached observer, of watching one’s own body and mind react and respond to the situation as it unfolds. This is very illustrative of sati-sampajanna when the level of mental energy is very high. In the earliest stages of samatha practice, the awakening to the fact that the mind has wandered is a distinct conscious event from the engaging with the object by the wandering attention. When one knows the mind has wandered, the thought it had wandered to is already gone. Likewise, the moments of ‘checking in’ with introspective awareness in the middle stages of samatha practice are distinct conscious events from the ongoing observation of the meditation object, and as such are actually interruptions of the attention to the meditation object (although if they are brief enough the interruption may not be especially noticieable). On the other hand, with upacara samadhi the sati-sampajanna can be simultaneous with the sati directed at the meditation object. How is this possible? In the early stages of practice, the energy level of the mind is not high enough that the mind has enough ‘bandwidth’ to encompass both at once. But in the later stages, as sati becomes more and more highly developed in tandem with attentional stability, conscious awareness can be focused on the mind while the mind attends to the meditation object, not as two separate objects, but as one object (the mind) that includes the other (the sensations of the breath). This is experienced as a change in perspective, as a ‘stepping back’, as an expanded scope of single pinted awareness. It is the opposite of what one does in order to enter jhana, which is also a change in perspective but is a ‘sinking in’ instead. At times in the past I have wondered whether deep jhana could be achieved with dullness, but was never inclined to find out for myself. Jhanic absorption does not require a high level of mental energy and sati, although it is completely compatible with it. I have since heard of several instances that seems to be deep jhanas with dullness. So without the deliberate cultivation of sati, a samatha practitioner can end up sitting in pleasant states of sustained dullness, or even progress to bliss-filled absorptions. But they will be lacking in one of the essential faculties required for Insight and Enlightenment, they will be lacking an indispensible Factor of Enlightenment – Sati, full-minded, fully conscious awareness.

I don't have chronic depression but I have mood swings like everyone else. What helps is the structured and diligent practice TMI lays out for you. Once you trust in the process and do the instructions with humility, the practice starts to work. 2 years is an important time frame to stop and look how far the practices had an effect on you. Normally, you should have some level of proficiency in formal sessions. (Like doing 90 mins sits even if it is hard. Sometimes accessing deep concentration. Not getting sleepy every session) And some skill in high quality mindfulness in daily life (like walking and moving meditation). Unless you feel these effects, stop the technique and try a more structured method like TMI. Depression is a roadblock but what you are experiencing is not due to depression but due to bad instructions and lack of systematic training. Depression can reduce your overall energy and create more subtle dullness but you'll get them through with a practice like TMI. You need to learn to maintain mindfulness even in dullness or extreme mood swings. This will happen post-stage 7 in TMI's system of training.

I'm glad my posts help you to practice better. Feel free to chat with me whenever you want

Attention and awareness are distinct ways of knowing in the mind. This is the same terminology Shinzen uses in different words: concentration (attention) and sensory clarity (awareness). Both Culadasa and Shinzen makes the same distinction but Culadasa emphasizes the importance of utilizing these 2 ways of knowing AT THE SAME TIME for deep mindfulness development. His techniques revolve around the delicate balance of these skills. Shinzen's noting techniques on the other hand eventually expect you to understand this exact same thing experientially without explicitly telling you what to do or how to do it. That is why I find Culadasa's explanation clearer. Again, read TMI for deeper understanding. Realize that VERY FEW books and teachers succeed to make this distinction to this degree that Culadasa does in his teachings. This one practice transformed my own practice and enabled to shave off years of frustration on the contemplative path.

Just read 'The Mınd Illuminated' by John Yates. It will answer all your questions about breath practice. Also short answer is: You need to first develop more stable attention by focusing on the tip of the nose ONLY. Don't move around too much without developing awareness. Then you should use awareness to simultaneously attend to external sounds, sights and mental formations AS you are focusing on the breath at the tip of the nose. You shouldn't let the attention move back and forth. Attention is on the breath. Awareness is on the rest of the sensory experience. AT THE SAME TIME. For more information, read TMI. Hope this help.

I've recently read this from Culadasa's Dharma website. I'm directly quoting the article from there as it is very precise and to the point: ------------------- Exactly how much concentration is needed to attain enlightenment? Stable one-pointedness in the degree corresponding to what is known as ‘Access Samadhi’ to some and ‘Jhana Light’ to others. Other aliases this samadhi is known by include ‘samatha’, ‘the first proximate stabilization of calm abiding’ and ‘shi-neh’. Is jhana heavy absolutely necessary? Cultivation of ‘jhana heavy’ is totally unnecessary for achieving the first stage of Enlightenment, Sotapanna, although it will spontaeously occur at the time of attainment. It becomes prevalent in the stage of Sakadagami and onward, developing naturally and easily. Is dry insight sufficient? Trick question. If you examine so-called ‘dry insight’, it is a method that involves achieving the level of samadhi identified as ‘access’ or ‘jhana light’ above, but without strictly limiting oneself to using a fixed object during the process. It has the advantage of developing a high level of sati, while pure samatha practice can result in access samadhi or jhana with significant dullness and relatively little sati. Mahasi Sayadaw provides a precise description of access samadhi in the Progress of Insight but he calls it “Knowedge of Arising and Passing Away”. U Pandita in In This Very Life and On The Path To Freedomdescribes exactly the same thing in very similar words, and even explicitly labels it as “Vipassana Jhana”, in which the first three vipassana jhanas are unmistakably what is otherwise known as “access samadhi”, or in our little circle, “jhana light”. As so many great masters of centuries past have repeated over and again, there is no Insight without Samadhi, and Samadhi without Insight cannot bring Enlightenment. A better question would be: “Is dry insight practice as effective at developing the necessary concentration as samatha followed by insight?” My answer: Perhaps for some, but probably not for most people. And the distinction between access samadhi and khanika samadhi is more apparent than real when one has done this practice for a while. What is the difference between stable one-pointedness that lasts one hour and stable one-pointedness that lasts for 30 minutes? Duration, nothing more. What is the difference between access samadhi sustained for five minutes and access samadhi sustained for five seconds? Only 295 seconds, nothing else. I am sure that those of you who have become skilled at access, aka jhana light, have noticed that after you have been doing this for a while you can shift the attention from the meditation object to the light, or the experience of piti-sukha, or the clarity of the mind, and so on without losing focus. Some of you have probably noticed that the mind can even dabble in some discursive thought along the way at the access/jhana light level without losing its stability. It is only in the early stages of achieving this samadhi that such transitions of object cause loss of stability. What makes Mahasi style Vipasanna practice special is that by making the arising and passing away of momentary experience its primary focus, it allows us to know what is going on behind the seemingly continuous and stable perceptual continuum we usually dwell in. For those of you who are familiar with the physics of light, it has the characteristics of both a wave and a particle simultaneously. If you design an experiement to reveal its wave-like properties, that is what you find. If you look instead for its particle-like behaviour, that is what you see. Does this remind anyone else but me of jhana (heavy type) and bhanga-nana? Once there is access samadhi, you can go either of two ways with it, just like the physicist can with light. Take the khanika path and it is Access to Insight (Mahasi style). Take the apana path and it is Access to Jhana.

I'm pretty sure that are people like that. Because there are upstanding moral individuals who are not awake spiritually at all. Awakening makes this process easier but doesn't guarantee anything. For instance, I'm not aware that Eckhart Tolle, Sahdguru or Shinzen have done such immoral behaviors. So it is possible. These are just different lines of development.

Yes. This is something I'm aware of as well. I've listened to Culadasa's life story, bipolar disorder and traumatic childhood experiences in his deconstruct yourself podcast. The claim: Culadasa spent money on hookers even though he is a family man. He lied to his family and engaged in adultery. A little bit of context is important. This guy had left his family and house when we was 15 years old. He was homeless for years. Try to imagine. His mother had severe psychological problems. Culadasa never went to public school in those 15 years. Very little social contact with his peers. Sometime down the line, he was admitted to a psychiatric hospital. Now for someone who had such traumatic experiences and depression, Culadasa experienced very deep states of meditation. His level of awakening is high. But as Ken Wilber talks about, he still needs work in 'cleaning up'. Culadasa is currently open to enter therapy to work with his shadow aspects. I'm not defending Culadasa but I can certainly understand these sort of ego backlashes due to his past. I'd expect someone who lived Culadasa's life to end up a criminal or a crazy person, but he did 180 and became a spiritual teacher. Culadasa's circumstances are similar to Joshua Sasaki Roshi. 'Waking up' line of development is very high, but there are still works to be done in morality and 'cleaning up'. And that doesn't mean TMI is bad. It just means that you need to supplement TMI with psychotherapy.

Hi Jordan. I'm not experienced in kasina practices. Daniel Ingram talks about it a lot though. Give it a try and if you get value from it, write down a post in detail how you do the technique, I'd be glad to learn from your experience

Mahasi noting has a concentration aspect to it so it is essentially an advanced samatha vipassana technique designed to facilitate insight. But you can also attempt to do this without any stable attention or awareness skills, then it becomes a dry insight approach like self inquiry. You can skip the concentration and stable attention development for the first stage of awakening (stream entry) but to advance further mastering the path of stable attention and strong mindfulness is essential.

Start a diet that supports the production of testosterone. Maybe add some modifications to your vegan diet. Also, do weight lifting and make sure your sleep quality and quantity is high. Alternative medicine methods can help you a lot unless there is a serious medical condition that underlies low testosterone levels. Check it with another doctor just in case.

From an outer perspective, he is not only enlightened but rather deeply enlightened in many aspects. Of course, he is not perfect. He has shadow aspects like all of us and even if he may not be a complete arhat, it is undeniable from his works that he is more advanced and spiritually awake than 99% of human beings. He has written one of the most detailed and well structured meditation book of modern times: The Mind İlluminated. Try the techniques and see if they work

I'm looking forward to it

This is my opinions on Leo's defense on Slavoj Zizek's Buddhism critiques. This is for fun. Nothing too serious but there are some important things I'd like to say. I'm not a Buddhist but I use Buddhist techniques as a primary investigation towards what is true. I definitely understand Leo's arguments but Slavoj Zizek doesn't appear to have a sophisticated understanding of Buddhism. This seems evident not only from his arguments but also from his non-experiential and academic demeanor. Here are some of the key points I'd like to talk about. Zizek's argument: Life is suffering but not all of us wants to escape suffering. Falling in love (knowing that it will eventually lead to suffering) is given as an example to support this claim. Leo's Defense: Suffering is only problematic from ego's perspective. God wants to experience all modalities of suffering and non-suffering as it is infinite. The reason there is so much love is that there is a lot of suffering. And that contrast of duality is the paradox of this work. Suffering is a negative motivation and pursuit of what is true is more authentic and less egoic motivation. Suffering is delusional so once you become conscious of what is true, non-suffering comes as a part of the package. Suffering is there for survival purposes. It is there so that you don't put your hand on a stove. My analysis: Both Leo and Zizek fail to make the distinction of pain and suffering to a clear degree for this argument. Zizek doesn't seem to understand that from the ego's perspective, even the most pleasurable moment is tainted by suffering due to craving and aversion. This idea that not everyone wants to escape suffering comes from lack of experience. Lıfe, as known from ego's perspective, IS suffering both the pleasure and pain. Ego wants to fall in life mostly because of the perceived pleasure it will bring. And it does that with a lot of craving and aversion. In this context, the ego is primarily dissatisfied without a relationship partner. It, then, realizes that falling in love comes with less suffering as a part of the package and accepts it without knowing a better alternative. Boredom and loneliness results in WAAAY more suffering compared to romantic relationships. So you are still running away from pain. The ego is just choosing the route that will result in less suffering. This is true for all egos. Leo is correct for the most part. I'd personally also view the pursuit of truth as a less egoic and more authentic positive motivation. But that doesn't mean people who want to eliminate suffering is shooting themselves in the foot. Leo also suffers as an ego and it gets in the way of non-dual consciousness. Once the suffering goes away, the truth is revealed. So separating these as radically different motivation is splitting hairs as both forms of motivation leads in the same non-dual consciousness. You can't know which motivation will actually get you to awakening more effectively as both are different perspectives on the path considering that awakening is a multi-faceted jewel. That motivation difference is more to the do with personality types, value systems, past experiences and conditioning. If you were a torture victim for the past 10 years, your primary motivation for awakening would be to escape from suffering by penetrating the experience of physical pain, not realizing what is true. On the contrary, if you were to spent the last 10 years discussing and thinking about philosophy, truth and science in relative comfort, your view of the spiritual path would be about realizing what is true. And non-suffering would come as a part of that pursuit. Leo's motivation is more holistic and deeper but that doesn't devalue suffering as a motivation in the beginning of the path. In fact, I'd argue that suffering was at least a part of the reason why Leo started the path even as a truth seeker. As you go deeper, your motivations and value systems will change and become more holistic and deep. Suffering is there for survival purposes is half-true. Pain is there for survival purposes. Suffering is how pain feels like from the ego's perspective. And ultimately suffering is an illusion because there is no self that can suffer. Also about Leo's example: The non-dual consciousness would also not result in you putting your hand in a stove. You don't become stupid when you get awake. You still experience pain as a raw sensation but there is no suffering anymore. You CAN turn this raw burning pain sensation into a pleasurable experience but when you are on that level of non-duality, would you even do such an act? You can do the same more effectively sitting on a chair and breathing. You might argue that on such levels of consciousness the distinction between breathing and putting your hand on a stove disappears but I'd say this as a counter-argument: Deep Awakening not only results in compassion for others but also yourself as the distinction between 'self' and 'other' is transcended on a deep level. Deep Awakening doesn't turn you into a masochist for this reason. I know Leo is aware of this but his example gave the impression that awakening would result in such behaviors. I agree with Leo's defense for the rest of the points.