Steph1988

@MochaSlap A world without music would be a terrible mistake. i play it myself, i listen while working out, i listen when i come home from work to chill out. When u listen or make it how does that make you feel? that is the most important question. And everyone has their own subjective taste of course but that music is a positive force is self evident so go for it .

@Huz Couple of questions hooking in on the idea that it might be fear. - What do you fear in socializing? - Is it only with certain people you have that anxiety if so what kind of people are those?

I am not into alternative healing and i know nothing about it, i am also very skeptic about it. But the day before i had my driving exam i was very nervous and my driving instructor recommended doing a session with a reiki practitioner. So i went and i expected nothing from it except as a funny thing to try. But i felt something strange, he used his hands to go around my arms and legs and he did never touch me his hands were like 10 cm from me at all times but at the place he had his hand i felt something i can only describe as if electricity went through that place. when i was done i did not feel weird at all and i was still nervous the next day i made it however on my first try although i don't know if that has anything to do with it. I try to be both skeptic and open minded at the same time with this. I still cannot explain this weird sensation can anyone explain to me what that is? has anyone else experienced it?

@Peace and Love Thank you for the explanation! That sounds like it is a kind of superpower i am gonna do some more reading in the other post if it works that well. U claim it cured u of your phobia's and some serious trauma in one hour and that was your first experience with it that sounds awesome. It raises this important question tho, If it is that powerful and easy to learn why don't u ever hear about it and why is it not practiced en masse? it should be mainstream then. i might try and visit him one day again maybe.

I want to listen to this with the windows shaking so loud ! For me it kinda reminds me off victory over your fears, so for me it fits in the self development category and i just like epic music.

@Loreena How do u want to achieve total well being? and u wanting to max productivity at work suggests that u like your work ( if i'm right of course ) what do u like about your work?

@Nahm haha i agree!

I do not have anything abstract to say really. I know what i want and work towards and i hope the journey will be as good as the results - Time for my interests and my family/friends i hope to gain that by having enough money to not get stuck in 40 hour jobs 30 hours is preferable - talking about that job i hope to enjoy my job in a certain way - an intimate relationship - mastery in guitar playing - a place for my own and someday starting a family - I have a thirst for knowledge so i want to tend to that - seeing more of the world This is enough to work towards and thinking in abstractions about it might come later. @Loreena what is yours btw?

@Nahm U were not pushy i didn't feel it that way at least i think u are right in what i have to to do i appreciate that very much. I just disagree about that one thing i place things under scrutiny and i look for the morals and values in things. And one of the most important things to me is to ask what actually IS valuable i am not just concerned with well being. But maybe i'm wrong who knows i have a long way ahead of me. @Leo Gura Yes thx i know what u talk about and i know what that feels like. up to this point i only felt it occasionally it is one of the best feelings in the world i think but it had eluded me mostly i am gonna try on more new things now. I heard in an interview with one of my favorite writers Robert Green that he had over 80 jobs before he began writing so i guess i am not the only one.

I have a few doubts about the whole business thing this is due to experiences in real life with friends,reading,thinking about it and just intuition i guess Ok so first let me say i am no specialist in anything i can cook reasonably well but not being interested of surrendering everything to it, same for playing guitar which i can do well, i love to read but that is just an interest as well. This makes me no specialist in anything but more a generalist and i kind of like that but i wonder do i miss out on something? or have i not found my main purpose yet? I am certainly never bored but i don't jump out of bed because of my all encompassing purpose either.And sometimes i wonder that is maybe not that bad. I have my own humbleness about the things i do and to build a business in my eyes implies that u want to sacrifice a lot of stuff. It means selling something you truly believe in and this seems to be kind of a moral choice as well to me in the case of building a self development business and if u have not mastered yourself to a very high degree how the hell can u begin a business in this then. A good friend of mine started his self development business a few years ago with some others but all were broke, had some bad habits left, working jobs on the side to pay bills so limiting the time spent on the business. it was doomed to fail and it did.seem to me they just decided on a whim to jump on the bandwagon of the massive self development trend. Self development is an ancient thing done by the ancient Greeks for example and adding to that and evolving it seems a good thing i think. But if u decide to start your self development business you have to ask yourself how can i add to this because the market at first glance seems incredibly saturated. So if you are interested in this and try to build your empire it seems to me u have to go all out on it. If not why not give your insights away for free on you tube, in real life among people who need help and point to good books written by people who gave their life for it instead of paying huge sums of money to hobbyists, I see a dark side in monetizing everything. This leads me to the question ''What can i add creatively what is not already there'' And too be honest i don't know. I can always point to people more skilled or articulate and experienced so i tend to do that. There is also a contradiction because many preach on the one had to be a minimalist, too be happy in the moment without stuff. and on the other hand building a business is seen as a staple in self development. and businesses need consumers. then i saw this very interesting comment on this forum i find it lets just say interesting. "Create your own online product or seminar or book and charge hefty for it. Don't care if already a thousand other people created the same content for free. After all nobody gonna know how much of a spiritual master you are if you don't have a thousand dollar product to sell to people who don't have the money but need it the most. Justify it with the phrase "You are abundand, so get the cash and pay for it, it's a self help product after all, it's the only thing that is worth buying anyway." Don't worry about the content of the product, it's just info you found from other spiritual gurus anyway. Don't make anything new up, don't even try. You will fail at this task. This product will rip off enough cash from miserable deperate people who need the cash for far more important stuff but who are so gullible that they willingly swallow ever glimpse of hope you throw at them so that you forever have a selfish and comfortable lifestyle..aka enlightened lifestyle with only sitting and dreaming your whole life.'' I am a little torn in this one what are your views?

@Akeberg No never had guidance in this particular thing, but an overwhelming feeling that if i did not do something about it that it would destroy my life.

No you are not off i am taking action however, this week i am gonna make a change in my job for example w'll see how it goes. I am gonna write down the stuff i want that is a good idea but i think it keep it simple because maybe i gotta go more with the flow maybe as i am literally tired of thinking up grand visions for myself. Ok i think that is right I don't get this at all tho and i disagree completely that is extremely unsatisfying but whatever lets leave it at that and thx for the tips.

@Nahm Ok that is a good exercise something to work with i'm all up for that. Don't u think about hows and whys though? What do u think about that quote for example does that put u to thinking? if i see something like that my mind goes haywire i don't want to condemn it instantly that would be boring but seeing that post got reps and seeing no one addressing it just puts me to thinking. So for the record is your philosophy in this the following?''do not think too much and get to your goals after you identified them''

@Nahm Ok but how can u make somewhat nuanced point then? Leo's video's are long and he says he has to to make a nuanced point and about this topic i admit that i find it hard to express my thoughts about it. i read it over and i still think it is quite clear but maybe it seems vague because it is more about a feeling that i have and that is sometimes hard to put into words. I also have to say that i since i wrote a few things on the forum and reading it back it is really helpful i never done that and just doing it and reading back a few doubts are slowly disapearing actually i still have them but they are maybe less an issue very strange.

Consider what Charles Eisenstein wrote in Ascent of humanity it is a perspective i have never heard before he connects the way the economy and money creation system is structured to it and it makes sense. professionalism is a factor in breaking down community and hearing the stories from my grandparents that seems right all tho we have the internet now what is both a blessing and curse. quote from the book ''A further example of the professionalization of friendship is to be found in the proliferating professions of life coach, grief counselor, psychologist, spiritual adviser, and so forth. Wise advice and a steadying hand, a person to turn to and a shoulder to cry on—these too are now for sale. The rapid growth of these “services” can mean only one thing: again, that something people once did for themselves and each other has been taken away from them and sold back. Cut off from community and alienated from our own intuitive wisdom, we find ourselves increasingly dependent on professional advice. Another thread in the mosaic of the monetized society is the replacement of such social functions as reputation, word-of-mouth, credibility, and trust with their standardized, objective counterparts. Since the professionals we pay are unknown to us and outside our shrunken social networks, we rely on various kinds of certification and licensing to assure us that these professionals are competent and responsible, protection we need in the absence of personal connections. We don’t know anything about these people, except for that tiny sliver of their lives that remains public. We know much less about the people around us than ever before. We are likely to know more about the “private lives”—matters of sex, family, and health—of our celebrities than of our next-door neighbors. And while word-of-mouth retains some power to enforce responsible professional behavior, especially in small towns, in the huge anonymous cities and suburbs, where much of the population is new to the area, we know nothing about our architects, doctors, contractors, and other professionals except what expert opinion, embodied in licensing exams and the system that confers credentials, tells us. In essence, exams and credentials represent the conversion of a social function—reputation—into money. A similar dynamic is at work in the laws to enforce contracts—a replacement for trust—and the penal code to enforce responsible behavior—a replacement for community-based social pressure. These are only necessary in a mass-scale, anonymous, monetized society.''

@Marc Schinkel When u talk about this stuff lots of people intermediately get kinda offended, do not want to think about it and ask of you the big solution to this i find that such BS. First off all you can be just interested in the topics secondly u thinking about it alone helps because u learn and we can have only democracy with a well educated and aware population. Pointing out problems in itself is a solution if no one had things to work on and everything was perfect we would not come to this forum probably. Some people expect that after having long thought about some problem and contemplated it and read about it for years u have some kind of solution the truth is they are indifferent to it all and that is their good right but it is kinda annoying to hear such lazy remarks. I say it is a stitch by stitch process but it starts with education,awareness and contemplation. This video from leo works at both a personal level and on the collective level i think. Had to get that minor annoyance off my chest keep up the good work!@Nahm ( it is a very good question of course but unlike you maybe most people ask this question with different intentions the question just reminded me off it )

Interesting i like to add this one

@Peace and Love nice pics I love it too 2 years ago i walked 80 kilometers straight together with a friend and we prepared during the summer for it i could do that any summer this is something i would like to do more.

I love debates

@ElenaO I am a cook and i like cooking and but like any work the stuff around it can be a pain sometimes.

Story of my life hahahahaha......ha I find most jobs so boring and frustrating almost to the point of aggression! to keep it in check i try to find all kinds of small projects during workdays and try to socialize as much as possible. occasionally i had some fun and i am actually quite a hard worker. it is especially on days that are quiet it is tough but we still have to be there 12 hours sometimes the only way to keep your sanity in check is to be a rebel on those days so playing pranks for example and i actually take great pleasure to confront those serious minded managers you know the types who do everything for their boss who are scared of authority and take it out on the people in lower functions well i have a permanent contract they don't throw me out so sometimes i make it my mission to make them feel as uncomfortable as possible and inciting some discontent among my coworkers putting them against the establishment in the workplace. Then there is the administration which in our case is completely meaningless i checked what they do with it and they glance at it one time and that's it so always when i do it i take last years pages and fill in the whole month or so putting last years stuff in random order never had any problems If i had to do my jobs like a good boy all the time i couldn't live with myself i think.

Listen the whole 9 minutes just beautiful not much words needed.

Ok some insights and questions about big topics i like to share let me know what u think. i was inspired to write this after seeing Leo's video on lying. topics are: - The lack of any clear long term plan or vision from our leaders and politicians - The lack of big idea's on mainstream media ( good AND bad ) - My suspicions about the charity subculture - My own impression that a large part of humans prefer emotional stimulus over deep thinking and problem solving Charity Questions Charity is something that is seen by most automatically as something good but i would like to pose some questions for u good Samaritans - If u are going to the third world and help ''develop'' those poor people did u think about the definition of development? Do u think this is long term? do we mean by development becoming like us? and having the same level of luxury as we have? Well who makes a LOT of our products for cheap and digs up resources? third world country's of course and armies of slave laborers. Do we even have enough resources on this planet to make it a reality and if not are we not giving them false hope? Are we ''the west'' at this moment a good example? - Why do u really go? ( and this one is of course not targeted to all of them i am not that cynical ) To feel good, to make selfies with poor children on your side and put them on your facebook and tinder profile? of course u go to really help! But how much does this this play a role in your motives? - If the problems would suddenly go away, so say we found cure for cancer and we solve the structural problem of poverty in a reasonably short period would u secretly be disappointed because the institute of charity in general would be obsolete and your purpose u put all your energy in would be gone. Intellectual laziness These days we let footballstadions stand up in the fight against cancer ( literally ) , we practice charity at extravagant dinners, and our celebrities do shows on TV to gather money for all good causes and people cry tears of joy. I sometimes mistrust these elaborate social rituals mostly because i am not hearing plans i see no discussions about how to structurally solve problems, Where does the problem come from? Do we need these problems maybe in some way to keep the status quo? instead i see a huge crowd being riding high on their emotions, is this enough? What is really going on i sometimes wonder. Sincerity i have this short documentary made by Christopher Hitchens ( who i always very much love seeing debating ) about mother Theresa He argues that she was a friend of poverty and not the poor and brings some dubious stuff to light i also heard for example that she refused to install elavators in the buildings and that she carried the sick which is i can imagine less efficient and i think to myself ''what is going through her mind while she makes such decisions '' does hard work equal effectiveness automatically? do we want to be effective? is there some part of her that knows that at that moment she depends on that poor person for her spiritual well being as he is on her to be dragged upstairs? This is such an example of suspicious charity. I think we need to think clearly on what doing good means i think we need to ask the most important question ''DOES THIS WORK LONGTERM?'' Lack of imagination The lack of idea's and debates do not stop with charity of course it is just an example. I miss it most off all in politics and during elections where we should talk about the big idea's and if u are gonna talk about the short term plans which are of course not unimportant at least talk about how they connect to the big idea's if trump wants to build a wall he can make some compelling arguments for it But once it is done then what? On the other side of the spectrum we can welcome all immigrants instead but again once they are in then what? where are the PLANS? maybe there are gonna be some success stories but i can see a lot of them going unemployed,bored maybe even joining radical Islam and why not after all we need a purpose right? And this is what i mean what about these future technology's? 3D printing,electric cars,nano robots,fusion energy or the countless alternatives but even then what about just planting some crops look at this! Where is the pragmatic problem solving? ( or at least talking about it ) something i find inspiring tho is for example what Elon Musk is doinghttp://waitbutwhy.com/2015/05/elon-musk-the-worlds-raddest-man.html this is an interesting piece about his idea's he asked himself a simple question how ''why is sending out rockets so expensive'' the solution was to reuse them and that cuts the cost drastically that was a technical solution and required no celebrities or chanting crowds just imagination. these are some insights i had and maybe they are wrong or can be improved i am open to that possibility i would like to know your views on this.

Yes the slow building up is to bypass u getting overworked this happened to me as well multiple times, u have to optimize your reward system and that can take a while but u can do it i assure u. U might even begin to like it.

i do mostly 5 k sometimes 10 k my record is 15 k in 1h27 i used to procrastinate with exercise but found a balance now the trick is indeed to do it daily if possible and don't exhaust yourself every time initially that will come when the habit is set.