EnlightenmentBlog

JUST DO IT! There is no other way. It will be painful but it's worth it. I feared doing pickup. Nevertheless, I went out there and talked to girls. Did I suffer. Yes. I mumbled my words, I was extremely uncomfortable, my heart was racing and I thought I would faint. BUT I did it. And the payoff was huge. I felt great. I was finally facing my fear. The pain of not taking action will grow even bigger, so do not put it off. Good luck!

In the past couple of months I'be grown so much doing a lot of the practices Leo has suggested - meditation, shamanic breathing, simple observation, contemplation, concentration and mindfulness throughout the day. You'be got to try them and see for yourself.

I've been struggling with it too. What I've found in my own experience is that I focus too much on myself. "What is this person going to think about what I said?", "Is this the right thing to do?", etc. Instead, I try to be aware of the other person/people, try to understand them. Shift the focus from yourself to the other one(s). What you will discover is that they are just as you, they have their own problems to care about. So even if you do screw up, they'll soon forget about it.

I thought meditation and mindfulness were going to solve my problems. They do, in a way, whenever I practice them. But the moment I have to be me again, my shyness, people-pleasing tendencies and perfectionism come back. And the funny thing is, now I suffer even more than before because I'm more aware of them. People would say that's a good thing, now I can act differently whenever I spot my weaknesses. Well, not exactly. It makes it even more painful because I cannot find strength to change my behavior or even if I do, this comes at the price of tremendous effort. I can feel my whole body react against it, as if it's programmed to act the old way. I guess Leo was right when he said that a strong ego is more easily surrounded than a weak one. I guess I have to deal with my own shit before really continuing on this journey, just as the people in the article.