stevegan928

What (in your personal opinion) are the top 5 most practical Actualized.org videos? Here are mine in no particular order.

I think It's cool that you talk openly about drugs that aren't socially accepted on the forum. I myself have thought about what it would be like to try meth, I won't try it though, it doesn't seem like a good idea.

I'm beginning to think that enlightenment arises out of insanity, I do all this contemplation but at the end of the day, if my boss is around I make sure to behave, if my family is around I make sure to put on my family costume, if I'm at church I put on my church costume, if I'm talking to a pretty girl I put on my confidence costume, costumes, costumes, costumes. I'm absolutely sick of the costumes, I want to just burn them all. The issue with this however is it will result in insanity. I will make people uncomfortable, friends won't wanna be around me anymore, "Stevens gone" they'll say, same with my family. Enlightenment really is death in this sense. So in this sense I certainly am becoming suicidal, I do wish to kill myself, I wish to kill the self that I constructed. What's stopping me? Fear. This is actually why I don't meditate or "self-inquire." I can see through the bullshit, I know that if I finish my meditation session and I still have all these costumes there's no point. "Oh but the costumes fade away with time" bullshit. I can choose to burn the costumes whenever I want but the uncertainty of what may follow is what instills fear in my heart and stops me from doing it. I do meditate from a hedonistic comfort perspective, I spend all my time seeking comfort so when I experience discomfort I meditate on it to be more comfortable. In this world of costumes I've constructed that's all that I find worthwhile is hot cheetos, porn, daydreaming, and youtube videos. Earlier in my journal posts I mentioned how when I do choose to properly seek enlightenment I think I'll realize it rather quickly. I still stand by that. Let me explain. If I start meditating for an hour a day I see myself quitting my job within the next 5 months (that's being generous more like 3) then I'll get rid of most of my belongings, cut my sister and her boyfriend out of my life by explaining to them that I'm about to start undergoing serious changes, I'll explain the same to everyone else in my life. I'll go be homeless and meditate by the river all day in the heat, I'll get groceries when I'm hungry and while I'm at the store I'll practice openness (this is where the insanity comes in) if I see a girl that I think is pretty I'll tell her "you're gorgeous" with an insane wide eyed look on my dirty, smelly, hobo face, she'll then get scared and run off, I'll express how that makes me feel right there in the moment, I'll be very open to everyone in the store, so open they need to get the fuck away from me, I'll be the opposite of contracted, I'll be expanded, I'll manspread all over society. As I walk back to the river I'll continue with my insanity, I'll be singing in tongues, chanting, talking to myself, talking to animals and trees. Then when I'm back at my meditation spot I'll just go back to silence, I'll sit until I physically can no longer keep my back straight and then I'll lay down for sleep. You see what these monks get wrong is the humbleness and politeness bullshit that they tack onto spirituality. Burn that costume, burn it to ash. Be batshit crazy expressive and look the terrified civilian in the eyes as your presence expands past the point of comfort, make them cringe, make them all cringe. If they expand with you then good, you're in the presence of a real human, as opposed to the usual zombie. While in public I'll be led by my whim, while in solitude I'll be led by my will. You see because there's nothing challenging about going crazy in solitude so that's the time to be a monk, but while in public we're met with resistance to the idea of insanity. My idea is that if we face this resistance head on, if we face our fears, we'll purge ourselves of the lie, the lie of the ego, Truth will be all that's left. After we find Truth then maybe we make some costumes again but this time we'll add some breathing room.

Glad we managed to come to an agreement.

You did well here, Emerald may deny it, or it may be my projection but she seems properly triggered. Your responses where sufficiently epic, you seemed calm, cool, collected. That last post of yours cut really fucking deep as well, implying she may even be a sub-par mother, evidence being the amount of time she spends crafting a long, detailed response which you didn't even read. This shows indifference to this whole petty little internet argument that your opponent got so riled up over. Again, you stayed calm, cool, collected. I think it's safe to say you won the exchange, not like you even care about winning which just makes you even more legendary. Emerald will question her very identity as a mother and wife every time she writes a post on this forum from now on. You? Well you only have 50 posts as it stands right now, even if someone could cast such a spell on you it's not like you've invested much into this site anyway. But what could they even attack? You've severed yourself from the bonds of female and societal validation. Not much more I can say here really. As you continue on your self-actualization journey I ask that you remember back to this moment, this moment of victory. Remember back to this moment during your next psychedelic trip. Say to yourself "I won. I won. I won. Victory. Victory. Victory." I know you don't care but trust me this is an important milestone in your journey you just don't realize it yet. So I ask of you to repeat the victory affirmation on your next psychedelic trip. The results may astonish you.

MGTOW philosophy is great as long as you replace the word "woman" with something like "illusion" or "maya" otherwise you'll come off as sexist. I mean women aren't actually real after all and it isn't just these evil "women" that act this way. This is actually just the world we live in, it's a bitch, so release yourself from the bonds of maya and go within.

So I've started my self-help journey by making a list of self help practices I feel would help me, then I put the list in an envelope and wrote on the envelope "Touch for self improvement" I made sure I touched it every day. Didn't do any of the practices, no, I would just make sure to touch a piece of paper each day. The paper is pinned up behind my shelf on the wall where I keep some of my self-help books (I've never read a whole entire self-help book btw) I just collect them I guess. So what this did for me I guess is it ensured that I cannot just buzz through my day without acknowledging at some point the necessity for me to self-actualize. If I feel myself dozing off I instinctively ask myself if I touched the paper today, so I guess it just gives me a little bit of responsibility. Then I added to my self-help practice, I started making my bed before I go to work, this ensures that I make my bed at least 4 times a week. Also just to switch things up I started doing a little ritual before I touch the paper, I would do a little spin, (a full 360) before I touch it, so now I'm a dog I guess. But now I feel I've ascended to the next level, I have actually cleaned my room and my kitchen, like the good little lobster dog that I am. They aren't spotless but they're good enough that I feel the difference, the energy in these rooms don't have the same dense frequency they had before. There is still more to do but I'm not gonna force myself to do it, I'm still trying to be conscious of my should statements. As for meditation I've given up on that for now, I meditate at certain points throughout the day or throughout the week. Whats the difference between proper meditation and proper life anyway? Notice how I said "proper" because these things done properly bleed into one another. What is my meditation practice? Throughout the day I find myself having neurotic thoughts, I then simply switch to "being cognition" and start perceiving reality from the perspective that I can't "get anything out of it" so that would mean I can't get anything out of my job, I can't get anything out of watching a self-help video,I can't get anything out of mindfulness, I can't even get anything out of being cognition. Releasing should statements sometimes feels like a meditation as well. That's just what I've been up to as well as a little bit of contemplation which I may make some journal entries about later.

30 Ways Stage Yellow Re-contextualizes Your Ass The Metaphysical Implications Of Making A Girl Squirt How To Become A Rockstar Vegetable Soup How Enlightenment Had A Leo Experience: God Becomes Absolute Leo 64 Benefits Of Hitler Reacting To A Commonplace Book Meditation's Solo Leo Retreat: 90 Hours Of Nonstop Leo In The Forest True vs False Squirting How To Shop For Healthy Non-Duality Learning = 5meo2cb Leo's Super Healthy Blueberry DMT Learning = Squirting Learning = Vegetable Soup How To Raise Rockstar Hitlers: Over 40 Techniques Understanding Explosive Orgasm Psychology: The Most SHOCKING Truth You'll Ever Hear The Dark Side Of Vegetable Soup

Yeah but Truth is just Truth and it has no outward appearance or "vibe" Truth is. But hey if you really want high standards then you shouldn't even be learning from lousy humans. You should let plants be your teacher instead. And no I'm not telling you to do drugs, I'm suggesting you go outside, stand in front of a tree, and let it preach it's gospel to you.

I read this and in my head I heard Jordan Peterson say "Ha, no. WRONG."

@Feel Good Anyone else find this Feel Good guy a little illogical? He's just spewing ad hominem attacks at the zen guy for no reason other than a sneaking suspicion that he might be "creepy".

@phoenix666 @brugluiz thank you

My best friend of 10 years just committed suicide and I'm having trouble processing it.

@Gabriel Antonio yeah i can talk to him again

@Emerald @Gabriel Antonio Today I went to church and spoke to the prayer minister for the week, (I lucked out today because I got to speak to a truly enlightened being) I've talked about it with others but when I talked with him I immediately started to weep, he then said a prayer for my friend's soul and his family. I wish I had got to talk with him for longer though.

@phoenix666 I would just look directly at him while he tells me his problems. I would occasionally repeat to him what he said and ask if I understood him correctly (thinking back he was naturally good at that himself). When we're done talking I'd give him a hug, let him know that I care about him and appreciate him, and let him know that if he ever just needs someone to talk to that I'll always be here to listen.

@RichardY I was talking with his sister and we both agreed that he seemed to always want more out of life, he felt severe lack. Looking back I wish I would've tried to connect with him more on a heart to heart level, that seems to be the only cure for someone feeling that level of lack. I would tell him it's all in his head, ironically that statement was coming purely from my head and not my heart. I guess it took the death of my best friend to realize the difference between preaching and helping. For some of us younger souls that's what it takes to get the message.

@RichardY That's one of the main things I've been thinking about. I went for a short jog and a long walk which helped me emotionally.

@ajasatya @Luna @Maximus Thanks, I'm having trouble getting the emotions out. I'm really sad and confused but I haven't really felt a strong urge to cry which adds to my confusion. Maybe I'll go for a run or clean the kitchen or something.

strawman argument. there has only ever been like 3 people in all of human history that have achieved enlightenment through smoking potatoes and those where baked potatoes. while thousands have achieved enlightenment through chakra work.

I imagine things all the time without believing in them. I guess that's another thing to add to my gratitude journal.

@Spacious There is a popular saying in occult circles "Acceptance and Will". This song comes to mind.

I'm beginning to realize that I'm doing the best I can. No need for self judgement, I'm doing the best I can given the cards I was dealt in this life, there is no possible way for me to be in a better place than the one I'm in right now, It can't get any better because better implies a sub-par alternative, sub-par doesn't exist, it's all "the best" as Donald Trump would say. Sadly this means there is no valid reason for me to judge others, however I will still continue to do so because it's a habit of mine, no reason to judge myself for judging either but I will continue with that as well. Everything is where it needs to be.

haha whoa dude, so you're using something non-physical to perceive physical objects? that's the most magical thing i've ever heard.

@see_on_see your inability to think of creative ways to make gaming videos shows a lack of imagination. frankly, as a human being with access to infinite creativity, you can do better.