Nilas

Its something i also wanted to ask here on the forum. I always get quite strong tinitus from all psychedelics i tried. I never understood why tho. Can you elaborate on that?

First off: I don’t know every one of Leo’s videos and blog posts by heart. So if my questions are answered in one of them, I’d be happy to be directed there. In Leo’s teachings, worldview plays a central role. On the one hand, a worldview is an unreflective, socially mediated perspective or answer to central questions of existence. On the other hand, and above all, it serves the survival of the collective and the individual, legitimizes (unconsciously) selfish, biased behavior, and feeds the ego’s fantasies. How do I figure out my worldview? One problem I often have with Leo is that the examples he chooses are exaggerated and obvious: Of course I see and understand that Trump, Netanyahu, fundamentalists, ideologues, or some left-wing lunatics are trapped in their own self-referential logic. But I’m not one of them. Of course, I have political opinions and have been indoctrinated by family and society with a worldview and a notion of right and wrong. But I see that this is relative. I am open to the fact that reality is not made up of atoms, that consciousness does not die after my death. It’s just that I don’t know; I have no direct experience that gives me certainty. When I ask myself how my worldview—that is, my basic assumptions about reality—justifies my survival and my self-serving actions, I find nothing. I am not a banker who must believe in something in order to earn millions of dollars; I am not a university professor who must publish to keep his job. Of course, in order to be accepted by my fellow human beings, I have to hold certain opinions. If I go to work tomorrow wearing combat boots and a side part, I’ll probably get fired. I see these subtle signposts—but that certainly doesn’t determine my worldview. Often, when I ponder existential questions, I find myself thinking: “Well, I just don’t know; I have no direct experience.” And so I go about my life with a worldview that doesn’t really feel like any particular one (which makes me very suspicious), open to other opinions and perspectives, but also without any real sense of absolute truth.

Thank you for your replies. I´ll check Kykeon out. Yes, above all, I was surprised by how intense the trip was. I know I'm sensitive, but 7 mg didn't seem like a very large dose to me. And then it was also very diffrent from plugging, where i had a strong body-load and intuitively made these symmetrical movements, the same ones Martin Ball makes. Nothing like this via vaping. The other thing was that, especially in hindsight, I really didn't know what to make of the experience. Mostly, I was just focused on breathing deeply to calm myself down. It was just as fast-acting and overwhelming as nn-DMT, which I hadn't expected. And so i thought it must be a derivative. Maybe if I can relax, I'll have time to reflect and contemplate even while I'm on the trip... I ll guess i plug next time again then. Thanks again!

A few weeks ago, I smoked something that was supposed to be 5-MeO-DMT, but I’m not entirely sure. After struggling for a long time to get my hands on 5-MeO-DMT, I found a source that looked promising: from the Netherlands, Clear Web, and apparently lab-tested. The color is slightly brownish (I would, but I can't attach a picture; I don't know why), but noticeably darker than NN-DMT. The smell is similarly sweet, but still a bit different. It smells a bit dark, turquoise, if that makes sense. I vaped about 7 mg, and within 15 seconds realized it was significantly stronger than expected. The trip lasted about 15 minutes, during which I lay in bed with my eyes closed and my heart pounding. The trip was very similar to nn-DMT, just without the tunnel or fractals; completely without hallucinations. Otherwise, it was very similar: overwhelming, intense, dissolving, panic-inducing… The afterglow wasn’t long and calm like with nn-DMT (at least it always was for me), but abrupt, sudden, and left me with a headache and a strong monkey mind. The trip had nothing mystical, spiritual, or personal about it. I’ve taken 5-MeO before (only plugged), and I can’t connect the two experiences in any way. I’m hesitant to take it again, since I don’t feel like smoking a chemical when I’m not 100% sure what it is. So here are my questions: Could it be a 5-MeO-DMT (or even nn-dmt) derivative? Does such a thing even exist? Is vaping 5-MeO-DMT that different from plugging it? Is there a reliable way (in Europe/Germany) to test for 5-MeO-DMT? Any idea what this might be?