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Everything posted by JKG

  1. 17/06/05 No phone in bed - Streak 0 Contemplating and embracing the desire to eat (10min) - Streak 0 Meditating 1h at a time - Streak 10 Switching meditation techniques no more than one time - Streak 7 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 26 Concentration (10min) - Streak 2 Fasting until 12 - Streak 3 Getting up directly - Streak 0 Waking up my body outside - Streak 31 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 2 Programming my Subconscious Mind (10min) - Streak 16 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 8 Gratitude - Streak 81 The new experience: Friends of our family were visiting us. It was nice to hear a different perspective from different parents - seeing a different "type" of parents, and not just my totally neurotic ones.
  2. Yes, its to easy. But building momentum slowly is better than no momentum at all. Its not particularly hard, but at least I do something that I normally wouldn't do. I would not take the opportunity to do something different, and instead stay at home and be productive. Normally when I have a lot of free time there are a many days where I just stay at home all day with the exception of running or biking. But otherwise I do not get out of the house, and all the days are like the same. Now I have a little bit of variation. Maybe I will commit for harder czcs, with the goal of one czc each week or something like that. I'll do that when the right time has come.
  3. 17/06/04 Contemplating and embracing the desire to eat (10min) - Streak 0 Meditating 1h at a time - Streak 9 Switching meditation techniques no more than one time - Streak 6 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 25 Concentration (10min) - Streak 1 Fasting until 12 - Streak 2 Getting up directly - Streak 2 Waking up my body outside - Streak 30 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 1 Programming my Subconscious Mind (10min) - Streak 15 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 7 Gratitude - Streak 80 The new experience: I was driving with my father to a few places, because he had to get some stuff done. I had to drive where I wasn't before. I am not comfortable with not knowing what to expect while driving.
  4. 17/06/03 Contemplating and embracing the desire to eat (10min) - Streak 0 Meditating 1h at a time - Streak 8 Switching meditation techniques no more than one time - Streak 5 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 24 Concentration (10min) - Streak 0 Fasting until 12 - Streak 1 Getting up directly - Streak 1 Waking up my body outside - Streak 29 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 0 Programming my Subconscious Mind (10min) - Streak 14 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 6 Gratitude - Streak 79 The new experience: some awkward moments while buying fruit and vegetables. I ran next to my sister while I taught her biking. I made a weird fruit salad with her. I again was to lazy to contemplate and just ate.
  5. Love of Learning I just love it to learn. Right now I am learning so much about programming and software architecture stuff. Not just by theory, but by doing it, applying it. Learning by doing. I feel like I learn much more than in all the 12 years of school. I always have learned the most when I did it on my own. I remember than about a year ago I taught myself vector stuff before we did it in maths class. I was done with that chapter so much faster than we did in class. And it was more fun too. Or when I tried to solve this complex equation without a solution which I needed for a little computer program. I love it to apply mathematical stuff to programming. Two passions combined! In these last two or three weeks I have learned much more in these three years of computer science class. Well, the computer science department of our school had some problems and therefore we couldn't follow the official curriculum. But still I don't know much about all these classes anymore. I just know what these concepts roughly are, but no depth at all. I need to get to the cutting edge of computer science in order to be successful, find my real life purpose, and to achieve something great. And this will still require years of intense studying and learning. At least 3 or 5 years of university. I am very excited to learn all this stuff. Especially advanced maths stuff and software engineering stuff. There are also some topics that I don't like so much, although I have almost no knowledge in these fields at all, like parallel computer architecture, statistics or a hardware practicum. Still I am excited to master this field and understand this deeply.
  6. Health I have to set priorities. And health isn't at the top. Its currently "only" my 8th value or something like that. I used to spend a lot of time on working out, researching about workout plans, creating workout plans for myself... And at some days I have spend a few hours doing something with my body. I still know that in the summer two years ago - I was in my triathlon phase - I firstly was on a very long bike ride (about two hours), and then went on a run afterwards. And then I also stretched and stuff like that. So I have spend a lot of time doing this stuff. I also have set myself a lot of goals. Like running a 5k in 25 minutes, a 10k in 55 minutes, a 3k in 12 minutes... Or running each week 40km and biking 100km. Or being able to do x pull ups, y push ups and y minutes of a plank. This was like a motivation for me to spend more time working out. But afterwards I have realized that this was not a proper kind of motivation. I didn't enjoyed it so much. I still want to be active and healthy. I feel the difference a lot when I haven't moved much one day. But so much exercise isn't needed to just feel physically good. Maybe 6km of running, or an hour of biking. And maybe 10 minutes of stretching between working sessions. Or not working out, but standing and walking a lot. I guess a standing desk with a treadmill would be the optimal solution to use time effectively. I should write "working out a lot" and reaching sports goals on my "not-to-do-list." I have other, more ambitious and important goals. The other major component to health is diet. And diet is even more important than exercise. The stuff that I eat is already good. Just the quantity is too much. And I work on that with my habits. He end goal of my diet is eating less and even more high quality. Steps would be: fully vegan gluten free raw vegan mainly sprouts mainly breatharian But this will take time. 10 or 20 years probably. I have to get independent and then do fasting and detoxing.
  7. Life Purpose - 17/06/02 I again programmed today for several hours. I guess for 5 or 6. But its not hard to do that. Its fun. I want to do it. Anyways, I started with testing my SelectionActivity, where the user can select with lessons from which units he wants to train. I got it working. There is just one bug left. I don't know how to solve it yet, but I know where the problem is. This is what it looks like now: I learned how to use the debugger in Android Studio. This will be very helpful. I wish I would have done this earlier. And I have changed the theme of Android Studio to a darker one. Its different, but I like it. Then I have started to change my software architecture from MVC or MVP. My program simply got too complex and I couldn't separate the model, the view, and controller properly anymore. So I have watched a good tutorial and skimmed a few blog posts. I firstly was very confused, but I started to copy some code. Then I started to understand this stuff. The presenter has nothing to do with all the andriod functionalities. One guy said that you should be able to made a desktop program out of an app easily, just by changing the view component. The model and presenter stays the same. So I have spent the rest of my day doing this. I am still not done yet, but I should be ready with implementing the rest of my old version of the app, and to implement the new selection stuff. While I was lawnmowering today I listened to Leos summary of Mastery. It reminded me again of the crucial concept of the plateau. Its so important. I should never forget this. Maybe I should write this on my mission statements which I review every morning. I also like the concept from Cal Newport, that you firstly have to reach the cutting edge of your field, before you can identify what you really want to do (your niche) and before you can make a meaningful impact. I need to get his book so good they can't ignore you. Ideally as an audiobook. In the afternoon I contemplated for 30 minutes sounds again. This time "what is the source of sounds?" or "where do sounds come from?" I watched a video by a programming youtuber. He talked about programming languages. I am happy to hear that Java and Python are widely used in the development of artificial intelligence. I wanted to start doing something in Python again, after I have finished my current project. Python was the first language that I learned, from a book at the age of 12. But I haven't done anything with Python for years now. And my Java skills will improve anyways, because Java will be the main language in university I guess.
  8. 17/06/02 Contemplating and embracing the desire to eat (10min) - Streak 0 Meditating 1h at a time - Streak 7 Switching meditation techniques no more than one time - Streak 4 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 23 Concentration (10min) - Streak 5 Fasting until 12 - Streak 0 Getting up directly - Streak 0 Waking up my body outside - Streak 28 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 34 Programming my Subconscious Mind (10min) - Streak 13 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 5 Gratitude - Streak 78 The new experience: I went with my sister into the swimming pool and stayed there for about 30 minutes. At first it was very hard for me to get into the cold water. I am not used to the cold water since I have stopped the cold shower habit. While swimming there I got an idea. At that time the idea was brilliant, but I guess I will hate the idea tomorrow morning. Instead of jogging around in the garden in the morning I now want to go for a short swim. The water will be cold early in the morning as well as the air outside. So that is also a bit of the Wim Hof method I think. It will probably be very challenging. In the morning I had the desire to eat an oat meal for breakfast. I wanted to start contemplating the desire. But then I was to lazy and just ate a huge bowl of oat meal. I feel definitively better without such a breakfast!
  9. @Gabriel Antonio The first half of the year isn't over yet. Only 5 months are over. You still have one
  10. Life Purpose - 17/06/01 Today I made good progress with my app. I worked on it all together for about 5 hours. I got the ExpandableListView working with a good tutorial from YouTube. I've had no major problems with errors. But I feel like the app is getting more and more complex. There are already so many classes and I really have to think about how to structure all of this. I have to think about how to handle the folder, unit, and lesson ids and names. Should I use Arrays, ArrayLists, HashMaps, TreeMaps... ? I see the importance of a good structure and software architecture. Maybe I will have to go from MVC to MVP for a better controllable structure. MVC worked fine until now, but MVP might be better when its getting even more complex. I also contemplated in my meditation session today for 35 minutes. I was not all the time super concentrated, but it was still good. I firstly contemplated the question "where do sounds come from?" and then "which meaning do sounds have?" I cannot identify where sounds come from. And sounds have inherently no meaning. My mind is just interpreting sounds and create the meaning. It was weird to listen how my neighbor was cleaning stuff with water, especially when he came near the fence. While eating lunch I watched a documentary about IBM Watson, and how he is able to win at jeopardy. Amazing. I guess I will now continue programming, because its really fun to have a more complex problem to solve.
  11. 17/06/01 Contemplating and embracing the desire to eat (10min) - Streak 0 Meditating 1h at a time - Streak 6 Switching meditation techniques no more than one time - Streak 3 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 22 Concentration (10min) - Streak 4 Fasting until 12 - Streak 1 Getting up directly - Streak 8 Waking up my body outside - Streak 27 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 33 Programming my Subconscious Mind (10min) - Streak 12 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 4 Gratitude - Streak 78 The new experience: I've had to do cut the grass in our garden at a different part of where I normally don't have to do it. So I had to use a different lawnmower which I have never used before. It is fueled with gasoline and is much heavier. So I spent about 2 hours driving around with this lawnmower. At some times it didn't want to work. I used coconut oil as a sun protection, because I yesterday had a sunburn. All the time I listened to the audio bonuses from the LPC.
  12. I am stuck with the same problem. I would love to master both life purpose and enlightenment at the same time, but I guess its more effective to do just one at a time. I chose life purpose, because I need to work my way up in Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs first. Like Leo said: "you still have to pay the bills." And I firstly want to be able to pay the bills in a high consciousness way. But still I will work on enlightenment for 1 or 2 hours each day and do retreats once in a while. So I would chose option A). But if you are able to go against the grain of society, chose B).
  13. 17/05/31 Feeling hunger in the afternoon - Streak 0 Eating no unreasonable snacks - Streak 0 Meditating 1h at a time - Streak 5 Sticking to one meditation technique - Streak 2 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 21 Concentration (10min) - Streak 3 Fasting until 12 - Streak 0 Getting up directly - Streak 7 Waking up my body outside - Streak 26 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 32 Programming my Subconscious Mind (10min) - Streak 11 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 3 Gratitude - Streak 77 The new experience: It was the day of the senior prank at my school. I had to explain a game to little kids and that was clearly out of my comfort zone. I also bought my friend back home which was challenging because of the traffic and because I didn't know the exact way.
  14. The day of the Senior Prank I don't know if a "senior prank" is known everywhere. I just have looked up this work. Here in Germany we call this "Stürmung" or "Abistreich." There the 12th graders - who just have finished their exams a week ago - party around the school all day, make funny little games with the teachers and students, and vandalize in the school with thousands of ballons, paperstreams, barrier tapes... And on the school yard is a stage, with huge boxes, a DJ... Well, that was today. We met at school at 7:30am. At 8am when the students arrived our year made games with the students and teachers. It was actually funny and better than the years before. The best part was when my history teacher had to play a model with a pink umbrella or my maths teacher with pink stuff in her hair. In the breaks loud music was played. This music was so deeply meaningful and emotional. The text was something like: "I give you a blow job. Oh, you are so horny. We take drugs in school. Oh, this night we will have amazing sex..." The music was so loud. I could feel how the bass was shaking my body. That was kind of cool. And at around 12am, when all the students came we played games with them. I had to do some kind of mental arithmetic game with them. That was outside of my comfort zone, because I always had to explain the game and read out the tasks. The time between these events - when the others had classes and we weren't allowed to play music - it was kind of boring. But I talked with @Mango1998. We were almost all the time in the bright sun, and now I have a slight sunburn. The weather was perfect. Not too hot and sunny. After the even was over we had to clean the school. It was so full of stuff. Thousands of burst balloons, tapes... but we were faster than expected. Then I drove my friend home, so that I know how to get to her home. Then I had to find my way back home. I didn't know the way, but luckily I had a GPS. I once overlooked the exit ramp on the highway. And luckily again my GPS found a good way for me. But I had some problems with that. It wanted to guide me through a forest street where a car can definitely not get through. Anyways, I got home safely. But I have realized that I don't like driving in cities where there is a lot of traffic. My eating was very crappy today. I ate two ice creams at school, and three pieces of cake at home, because it was a birthday. And I have done almost nothing productive, just my habits. In the afternoon I felt so exhausted. I was glad that I could meditate and do nothing for an hour without falling asleep. Then I sat outside with my family. And then I did nothing productive while surfing on the internet. I just looked a bit on the page of my future university because of the minor subject. I just cannot decide between electrical engineering and maths. This will be a tough decision - like in the past when I had to decide between chemistry and physics as an advanced course. I took chemistry and am now happy with that decision.
  15. Don't take my formulations to seriously. I just write that what comes to my mind, and I don't reread it afterwards. One person doesn't has to know everything. I can work together with other people who are more passionate about Biology. That would probably be a waste of time. You have to focus on one thing. Maybe a little bit of cognitive science is necessary, but not the whole field of Biology.
  16. 17/05/30 Feeling hunger in the afternoon - Streak 0 Eating no unreasonable snacks - Streak 0 Meditating 1h at a time - Streak 4 Sticking to one meditation technique - Streak 1 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 20 Concentration (10min) - Streak 2 Fasting until 12 - Streak 4 Getting up directly - Streak 6 Waking up my body outside - Streak 25 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 31 Programming my Subconscious Mind (10min) - Streak 10 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 2 Gratitude - Streak 76 The new experience: We had to meet at school today. We firstly got information regarding tomorrow. Then we all had to blow up 5000 balloons - people want to do crazy shit when they want to party. We were like 80 people. I feel like I have blown 200 balloons. At some points I felt pretty bad because of breathing so much. And the taste of the balloons was also not that nice. And it was pretty hot. I need to find a better way to measure my fullness. Just saying "stopping eating when I am full" is hard to measure and I easily start to trick myself. But actually feeling hunger is a good indicator that I have not eaten too much at lunch. And then its also less likely that I will snack in the afternoon. Well, I still need to figure out a better way to measure this stuff. Right now i feel like I am falling back into old back habits, especially regarding eating raisins.
  17. Spending Time I have neglected meditation and personal development stuff in the last few weeks. I have been focusing more on working, which means life purpose stuff, and that means programming and working on my app. I just want to get this goal done of developing 3 usable applications. Today I have been doing less programming - maybe just 3 hours. And I have been doing a little bit more consciousness stuff. I contemplated/meditated in the morning for 25 minutes, and did 1 hour of do nothing in the afternoon. And I did some inquiry stuff, and by that I mean journaling and applying the wisdom from "loving what is." I should do that a little bit more, and not just doing programming. I will do enough programming stuff in university, and then i will have less time for personal development stuff or consciousness stuff. If I do that stuff now i will feel better in a few months when I have no time for that anymore. But I still have this feeling of wanting to get stuff done. My ego sometimes sees things like socializing, skyping, doing stuff in the household or doing others a favor as a distraction, so that I will not be able to get as much programming stuff done as usually. I should do "the work" on this belief. I should do "the work" now everyday if possible to get all of these stupid believes out of my mind and feel better in the long run. One problem that my ego sees is "the one thing." Successful people have only one main activity or one domain of mastery in their life. Elon Musk has huge visions and is proceeding well on his way towards colonizing the mars or transforming the industry of electrical cars. But on the other hand he doesn't seem as happy and calm as some other people who are on this path. He also looks not that healthy. He mainly focuses on his business and working on his huge vision. I just need to find the right balance for the right time. I need to balance consciousness work, life purpose work, and other self-actualization work. Oh god, there is so much stuff that I could do. And Leo always says you should do all of these things, and that all of these things are absolutely important... I need to learn how to unicycle properly.
  18. Life Purpose - 17/05/30 Today I feel like writing a bit about my life purpose and what I thought throughout the day. In the morning I tried to make a new activity with a list view. I just created another project, so that I don't have to deal with this whole testing stuff anymore. But still I've been having a few technical problems. So after 1.5h I ran out of steam, and anyways I had to go to school soon. Later in the afternoon I dealt with that problem again. It started working a bit. It worked out a bit. I have realized that I can work much more efficiently when I have a calm mind and am not annoyed or frustrated. Then I can read blogs or watch tutorials much more concentrated. Otherwise I just skim through the content and search for the one solution that fixes my problem immediately. And that doesn't work out most of the times. I have to understand the context. I also contemplated my zone of genius a little bit. I am not in my zone of genius when I am dealing with all these technical problems. I hate that. But that is probably what Leo calls drudgery. That is stuff that is quite annoying, but which has to be done anyways. I am more in my zone of genius when I actually develop a structure for the whole project and a plan on how to implement it. With the time I have to go more into the details. And then I can start working on implementing the stuff. Then I "just" have to search through the web for ways to do it with the code and work through the technical problems, exceptions, and errors. While I am dealing with the technical problems and errors I should practice a bit mindfulness. I don't like the feeling of frustration and annoyance. That is a very low consciousness feeling. The computer can't do anything about the problems. The computer just does what its told to do. And I just want the computer to do what I want him to do. Thats my whole problem. I need to understand that the computer cannot do anything against my problems. I need to understand the problem more deeply, and then its easier to find a solution. I have been thinking a bit about AI today. I have been kind of discouraged by a topic. I really want to create technology that advances human consciousness. And then I started to think about how to achieve that with AI. AI is just like a program on a computer. Its needs data and data is the only think an AI can process. Therefore AI needs some data input. Maybe that could be some neuro feedback, to create better neuro-feedback-training. Or it directly connects with the brain and is implanted in the brain. And then I have been thinking about my minor subject in university, also because my father said that I should start to specify what I want to study. Maths or electrical engineering. Both seem legit. For pure AI maths would be better. But if I want to create other kinds of technology without AI which need some hardware electrical engineering would be better, because then I know how to build the hardware - at least a little bit. I don't know which one to take. I just want to make the right decision, and not be totally influenced by my father - who obviously would prefer electrical engineering.
  19. Loving what is I have been applying "the work" on my mother. I often have bad thoughts about my mother. They are kind of judgmental. The situation: She often is cleaning the house. She cleans the house for multiple hours each day. Much more than she would have to. And much more than is necessary. She could clean for half the time and the house would be still very very clean. She is addicted to leaning. She so often uses the vacuum cleaner. That is so loud and the sound is very unpleasant. For example yesterday I got pretty angry and annoyed. I wanted to program in my room, but Monday is the day on which she cleans my room pretty much. Firstly she uses the vacuum cleaner, then she goes with the mob through my room, and then also she cleans all my shelves... It is so unnecessary that she uses the vacuum cleaner and then uses the mob. She is doing so much every day, week after week, month after month, year after year, and soon decade after decade. My thinking: I sometimes become angry and annoyed because she cleans the house so much. She is wasting her life by cleaning so much. She is stressed, neurotic, unhappy... It hurts to see her this way. I want her to be happy. I want her to use her time with more useful stuff so that she becomes happy. And if she has free time she wastes it with television, news papers, websites about "vips." Insights and turnarounds from doing "the work:" My thinking is annoying me, not her cleaning. My thinking makes me sad. I waste my life by thinking these thoughts. I want myself to realize that my thinking wastes my life. I should stop believing these thoughts to be more happy. I should stop believing these thoughts to do more stuff that makes me happy. I waste my own life and annoy other people with that behavior. I am looking forward to see her not realizing that she is wasting her life. I am looking forward to see her cleaning. She is really good at cleaning. She wants to clean, so she cleans. It brings her (very low consciousness) satisfaction. So why should I not want to see her cleaning?
  20. Programming Progress After a few problems with the database in which the vocabulary is saved, I was able to finish the first version of my little "VocabTrainer" app. As I finished it two days ago I was pretty happy and excited. Here is a shot of how it looks right now: Yesterday I started with creating a structure for a bigger database. One of the big problems is opening the existing database file with android. Its more complicated than I thought. Then I wanted to start "unit testing." That means testing only one part of the application - in my case the database. But this is way more complicated than I thought. Android Studio has a good solution to do this - with stuff like Mockito, Espresso or Robolectric - but I just can't handle that shit. It just doesn't want to work. And when I search for solutions on stackoverflow there is no such solution, probably because nobody else wants to test a database that way. So yesterday I spent almost my whole working hours on this unit testing stuff - without success at all. So today I didn't wanted to do testing with the database, but instead trying out creating a ListView and an ExpandableListView. And again I ran into the problem of testing. Now I need an Instumented Test. So again I tried out this testing stuff - and again it just didn't work out. I am frustrated and annoyed. Why am I doing this android app development thing? Just because my father gave me this task of creating a vocabulary trainer for my sister? Probably yes. But I don't want to quit this now. I firstly want to create a working app that is usable - thats one of my goals. I have already quited so many little projects as soon as they got a little bit too complicated and the structure too complex. I want to finish it first. Then I will get into some AI stuff. And I don't let my father give me another programming project idea/task.
  21. 17/05/29 Eating only until I am full - Streak 1 Eating nothing after finishing dinner - Streak 0 Meditating 1h at a time - Streak 3 Sticking to one meditation technique - Streak 0 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 19 Concentration (10min) - Streak 1 Fasting until 12 - Streak 3 Getting up directly - Streak 5 Waking up my body outside - Streak 24 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 30 Programming my Subconscious Mind (10min) - Streak 9 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 1 Gratitude - Streak 75 The new experience: I picked up my sister and a boy from the neighborhood from school. I was mountain biking at midday in the heat. I skyped.
  22. how much do you drink now? I have an idea of how you could appease your mother. You could fast for one day each week - but with drinking water. This is actually very healthy for your body.
  23. 17/05/28 Eating only when I am hungry - Streak 0 Eating only until I am full - Streak 0 Meditating 1h at a time - Streak 2 Having a new experience or doing a comfort zone challenge - Streak 18 Concentration (10min) - Streak 1 Fasting until 12 - Streak 2 Getting up directly - Streak 4 Waking up my body outside - Streak 23 Dorsiflexion exercises - Streak 29 Programming my Subconscious Mind (10min) - Streak 8 Apple cider vinegar in the morning - Streak 0 Gratitude - Streak 74 The new experience: I visited my grandmother in the afternoon with my mother and sister. There I went for a 50min run in the heat. I think its enough to firstly try to "eat only until I am full."