Cheese

After a time of thinking and remembering. I think i am now leaning more toward your idea of what this is. That they are indeed lightships capable of interdimensional travel.

I hope he is right, i have now heard so many pov's and different explanations that my head is now exploding. All i know is that these light-orbs are also observed in a place in northern Europe for the past decade. So i wonder if this is a worldwide phenomenon. I can see in the video that it is flying by, why cannot it be in Europes atmosphere in a few hours and later appear above Australia.

Haven't been there. I think there is a movie/documentary in production about the ranch. Peter Maxwell from Australia usually records these types of orb flashes as well.

Well this was a wonderful post

The reason i do not commit suicide is partially that i held the info in this article being true or fear of it being true: https://blavatskytheosophy.com/what-happens-to-people-who-commit-suicide/ The first years i held myself alive because i did not want my close family to suffer. The deeper i got depressed, that barrier slipped away. Later i held myself alive by not wanting/feared to spend rest my life in the Astral plane (belief). Then that slipped away. Finally i accepted that the suffering i experienced is deserved, i am obliged to experience this suffering and not selfishlly escape it through suicide. I think after that the suicidal thoughts lessened. Giving up alcohol and starting antidep meds also helped.

How deep does self-deception and fantasy go? presenting: The biggest Spiritual ego-lift that (never) happened. "On January 30, 1987, Sri Chinmoy lifted a weight of 7,063¾ pounds using only his right arm. It was an achievement that challenged the limits of human possibility and it shook the world of weightlifting." “If I ask my mind whether I can lift 7,000 pounds, immediately it will say, ‘Impossible!’ ... But when I am in the heart, with the heart and for the heart, there is no such thing as impossibility because of the heart’s oneness.” — Sri Chinmoy https://www.srichinmoy-reflections.com/miracle-lift Quoting a forum post from a photographer about the lift, unfortunately it was in caps lock: WHEN IN ABOUT 1985 HE STARTED LIFTING WEIGHTS, HE DECIDED TO USE PHOTOGRAPHS OF HIMSELF DOING `SUPERHUMAN FEATS' OF STRENGTH, AS YET ANOTHER VECTOR OF HIS DRIVE FOR PUBLICITY, FOR WHICH HE HAD AN INSATIABLE APPETITE. IF HE DID NOT SUCCEED IN LIFTING THESE RECORD AMOUNTS OF WEIGHT, IT WAS NOT FOR LACK OF TRYING, INDEED HE DID LEGITIMATELY SUPPORT FAIRLY IMPRESSIVE AMOUNTS OF WEIGHT FOR A MAN OF HIS AGE; HE WOULD STRUGGLE, FOR EXAMPLE, WITH TWO HANDS TO GET A 100 POUND DUMBELL ABOVE HIS HEAD, AND THEN HOLD IT BRIEFLY ALOFT WITH ONE HAND. SOON I WAS ASKED TO COME TO HIS HOUSE, WHERE HE WOULD INDICATE FOR ME TO DRAW CLOSER TO HIM...`Good Boy' HE WOULD SAY( I AM PARAPHRASING HERE) ,` IS IT NOT POSSIBLE TO MAKE THIS THIS LITTLE PIECE OF THE MACHINE LOWER? YOU CAN SEE IT IS ALREADY LIFTED....BUT FOR THE PRESS?.............SO THAT THEY CAN SEE CLEARLY???'.... WELL, HE STARTED ASKING ME TO DOCTOR THE PHOTOGRAPHS OF HIS LIFTS MORE AND MORE TO MAKE IT APPEAR AS THOUGH HE HAD LIFTED HIGHER AND MORE IMPRESSIVELY THAN HE ACTUALLY HAD. BECAUSE OF THE FACT THAT THE WEIGHTS HE WAS TRYING TO LIFT WITH ONE ARM BEGAN TO GET PROGRESSIVELY MORE UNREALISTIC.. AND INCREASING EXPONENTIALLY, I WOULD HAVE TO AIRBRUSH IN.. OR OUT, BITS OF APPERATUS AND ADD SHADOWS WHERE THERE WERE NONE, GIVING THE ILLUSION OF A LIFT EVENTUALLY I WOULD WORK MORE AND MORE CLOSELY WITH THE PHOTOGRAPHERS....UNTIL I BECAME, MYSELF, ONE OF SEVERAL PHOTOGRAPHERS. AS THE WEIGHTS INCREASED I NO LONGER HAD TO AIRBRUSH. AS PHOTOGRAPHERS WE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE IT LOOK AS IF WEIGHTS HAD BEEN LIFTED. WE WOULD SHOOT FROM A LOW VANTAGE POINT SO AS TO MAKE IT LOOK AS THOUGH THE WEIGHTS HAD BEEN SLIGHTLY ROLLED UP THE BEND ON WHICH THE WEIGHT WAS CRADLED. NOW THE STORY OF THE 7,OOO POUND LIFT THAT NEVER WAS...... AND THE TURNING POINT FOR ME.. NO MORE DENIAL. THAT DAY, ( I CANT REMEMBER IF IT WAS DAY OR NIGHT?), ABOUT 15 PEOPLE WERE SUMMONED TO HIS HOUSE.. INCLUDING A HANDFUL OF PHOTOGRAPHERS. ON THIS OCCASION I WAS JUST A WITNESS AND NOT A PHOTOGRAPHER. THE APPARATUS, A METAL FRAME WITH TWO U-BENDS CRADLING THE WEIGHT AT SHOULDER HEIGHT STOOD THERE. THE BUILDERS OF THIS WELDED MONSTER WERE SCURRYING AROUND CHECKING THE FLOOR FROM THE BASEMENT WHICH HAD BEEN REINFORCED WITH STANDING METAL BEAMS. BARE IN MIND NOW THAT SRI CHINMOY HAD SAID ON AT LEAST ONE OCCASION, THAT HIS FEATS OF STRENGTH ON EARTH WERE AS NOTHING COMPARED WITH WHAT HE WAS DOING IN THE INNER WORLD.... SO SRI CHINMOY STOOD UP, WALKED AROUND THE WEIGHT, ROLLED HIS EYES IN MEDITATIVE REVERIE....THEN TOOK HIS GRIP ON THE BAR. HE CRIED OUT, HIS FACE TURNED RED.. ALL THE DRAMA OF GENUINE EFFORT, EXCEPT THAT THE WEIGHT DID NOT BUDGE, DID NOT EVEN TREMBLE, IT WAS AS IMMOVEABLE AS EXCALIBER. SHORTLY WE WERE WATCHING THE VIDEO TAPE. SRI CHINMOY WAS THRILLED.....AS HE PLAYED IT AT THE APPROPRIATE MOMENT, HE GLEEFULLY SHOUTED "THERE! DID YOU SEE?!'. CAME A DEAFENING SILENCE, AND THE TAPE WAS REPLAYED. `LOOK! DID YOU SEE?!' THIS TIME RANx AND A FEW OTHER OF THE GIRLS, POSSIBLY A FEW BOYS TOO, ENTHUSIASTICALLY AGREED, YES, THERE HAD BEEN A LIFT. THEN THE VIDEO TAPE WAS PLAYED AGAIN AND A FEW MORE PEOPLE WERE WON OVER. THEN AGAIN AND AGAIN. EVENTUALLY SRI CHINMOY WAS REDUCED TO ACTUALLY EYEBALLING INDIVIDUALS, ALL BUT PLEADING FOR THEM TO COME ACROSS. IT WAS ACTUALLY QUITE SWEET/PATHETIC. TALK ABOUT RETAIL POLITICS!

That is great to read that you got something of your spiritual practice. I could have some unconditional joy right now, but the only thing I am aware from my 10 years half-assed spirituality is an extra 40kg and some debt. I guess I grow in size and not in wisdom. Seems like your internal super-ego voice is reffering Leo as an authority: "The superego is the inner voice that is always putting us down for not living up to certain standards or rewarding our ego when we fulfill its demands . . . In fact, our superego is one of the most powerful agents of the personality: it is the "inner critic" that keeps us restricted to certain limited possibilities for ourselves."

What are the actual issues are you referring to? Not interested in the alien stuff, only got aware of it from this forum.

I did experience my AA meetings that way after a few months of sobrerity. But yeah most addicts are some of the most damaged people, AA might purge a bit of the selfishness to not go back drinking but not more than that. Atleast in my AA group most people, including myself, hang on in the beginning of their sobrerity for a few months and then leave. It gave me a boost in remembering how horrible drinking was, but being a damaged individual amongst other damaged individuals does so much for healing, better to spend time with "ordinary" people and build a new life.

Might be an idea to meet with a teacher who has gone past what you term "awakening/enlighment" in real life. Some might sense where you are at and determine where you are stuck.

Like someone already mentioned, there are lots of different theories about this. But I found a theory to explain them all, the ultra-terresttrial hypothesis. An explanation of this theory can be heard in the video below, i post this just for entertainment.

Change cannot percieve change. Only the changeless can perceive change. Stuck in the ego, we see as if the world is still and not changing. This makes us want take action and change it. Being the changeless witness we see that everything is in constant change, there is great satisfaction in that observation.

My account has been inactive for over a year, I just logged in to comment on the above video. I partially watched this and it got me awestruck. Never have i seen a person achieving delusion to its completion in human form. I do not know if I should feel pity or disgust. The spiritual word sallad has been generously laced with mayas dew. The viewcount and traction towards such talks are concerning but not surprising.

Todays reflection: Feel sick, tired and a bit angry. Have had cravings now for the last days. I feel like this program aint worth it and doesn't help. I haven't done anything of it latelely. Probably will write in the steps and go through with my sponsor. Now i generaly think about relationship security as stated in above video. Probably will buy her book and see if it is worth it. I am right now filled with so much of my own bullshit that i cannot think straight.

God blessed me to live permanently in my moms basement